Awaken, My Memories!

"Ugh... why are you dawdling like this? Just think of it as digging your own grave."

"Are you even speaking human language...? And I have a feeling this is supposed to be my grave."

Your grave?

"Yes, because I think I know who wrote this letter."

"Hmm? Is there some secret that you don't know, sister? Tell me quickly."

"..." Xingsu ignored Lin's gossipy nature and just kept digging the grave. He knew that the people, memories, and everything from the past that he had been searching for were buried here.

Without any tools, he bent down and plunged his hands directly into the cold soil, digging at the soil with almost obsessive force.

The rough gravel and hard soil rubbed against his palms, and his fingertips were quickly cut. Warm blood mixed with the soil and soaked into the pit, but he seemed not to feel the excruciating pain. He just mechanically and frantically dug downwards.

Each time a hand probes into the ground, it feels like tearing open a layer of the past that fate has sealed away.

The truth was so close, yet fate had already written the ending, and he was destined to be entangled with the broken old times. The night wind blew through the broken walls, making a mournful sound like a sob. Two wordless stone tablets stood silently, and the flower that had never withered quietly witnessed him using his bleeding hands to personally uncover a long-destined fate full of regrets.

He wanted to retrieve his lost memories. He wanted to know who he really was, to understand the buried past between him and Arlecchino, to figure out the secret the necklace carried, and to understand the source of his recurring heart palpitations and inexplicable familiarity.

The pain in his palm had long since gone numb; only the obsessive obsession in his heart continued to surge. What was buried underground was not just a necklace, but also his missing youth, the answer he had to reach.

The moment Xingsu's fingertips touched the hard object, his movements suddenly stopped.

Fingers stained with mud and blood brushed away layers of damp soil, finally revealing a necklace long buried by time. The metal gleamed faintly in the pale moonlight, and the patterns hidden beneath the mud remained clear—the very object Lin had been searching for.

He held the necklace tremblingly in his palm, blood trickling through his fingers and dripping onto the cold pendant. The clue he had been searching for was finally in his hands, but instead of the joy he had hoped for, a huge emptiness welled up in his heart.

He knew that this necklace unlocked not only the mystery of his origins, but also his past among the Fatui, and the inexplicable love and hate between him and Arlecchino.

The missing memories were right before his eyes, yet he suddenly felt lost, wondering if he was truly ready to accept everything from the past.

Lin's slightly teasing voice echoed in his mind, breaking the dead silence around him.

"Hey, what are you standing there for? We've come this far, you're not going to be a coward, are you?"

Xingsu looked down at the necklace stained with blood in her palm, her fingertips trembling slightly. The unease that had been building up in her heart ever since she met Arlecchino finally turned into a soft question to herself.

"Lin... I was just wondering, if I regained my memories from the past, would I still be myself?"

Now, she has a stable life in Poisson, with the highly capable leader Callas guiding the Spina di Rosula forward, the warm-hearted Navia treating her like family, and a group of harmonious townspeople and partners.

The Fatui are no pushovers.

If all the long-forgotten memories were to return, would those entanglements with the Fatui and Arlecchino bring danger to everyone in Poisson?

"But... have you ever considered that your past determines your present?"

When you first helped that little girl in the House of Daena of Sumeru, did you ever think about what made you choose to help others without hesitation?

When your research was suppressed by the Akademiya, did you ever consider why you refused to compromise with the Great Sages and instead pursued new technological breakthroughs on your own?

Even if your memories return, you will still be the same strong and kind person you are. Everything that happened in the past will only make you cherish the life in front of you more, rather than completely replacing who you are now.

However, if you keep moving forward with an incomplete life, no matter where you go, there will always be an unfillable void in your heart.

Where did your magnanimity from Chapter 36 go?

You said back then that you didn't care whether you were a savior or a heinous villain in your past life. Now that you've been reborn, I can do whatever I want and save whoever I want.

At worst, once I regain my memories, I can make up for all the mistakes I made before.

If a person can't even face their own past, then that person is nothing but a coward, a timid coward who only knows how to run away.

"..."

"Ah, yes, now that I'm here, what am I still hesitating for?"

Even if my past self has presented me with challenges, I am determined to overcome them in the future.

Moreover, I intend to trade these memories with you for power and blessings.

"Come, child of memory, hold the necklace tight, feel the memories within, and repeat after me."

I use the stars as my guide.

I use the stars as my guide.

"Traces of Memory"

"Traces of Memory"

"Revive, my memories!"

"Revive... my... memories!"

The necklace in his palm suddenly glowed faintly, and countless shattered images, like a torrent breaking through ice, rushed wildly into Xingsu's mind.

In the dimly lit, cold corridors of the House of the Hearth, Crucabena's cruel and ruthless rule pushed countless orphans into endless slaughter. The law of the jungle, where the strong prey on the weak, was the only rule in that inferno. He saw his younger self struggling to survive amidst blood and fear, encountering the gentle Clervie and also Peruere.

Those times of mutual support and comfort were especially precious amidst endless strife. Together they endured the cruel selection process, finding warmth in each other's despair, believing they would eventually escape the darkness. But ambition and oppression would not cease; Crucabena's control grew increasingly ruthless, ultimately leading to an inevitable and fateful final battle.

The firelight tore through the deathly silence of the House of the Hearth, and the clang of clashing swords echoed in his ears. To protect those he wanted to protect, he stood alone in front, fighting Crucabena to the death with all his might. The excruciating pain of weapons piercing his body was crystal clear, his life force was slowly draining away, his vision was gradually blurring, and the last thing he saw was Arlecchino's figure.

It turns out that the eternal slumber was not an illusion. Buried beneath these ruins is not just the necklace, but also the final fate of someone who died here. The past battles, the regretful partings, and the sorrowful ending have all returned to their rightful place.

"Arlecchino, the House of the Hearth, the Fatui... I see, you did it, Pepe..."

As the final image of his death in battle faded from his mind, Xingsu slowly opened his eyes.

All the memories of the past returned: the battle at the House of the Hearth, Crucabena's tyranny, the moments spent with Arlecchino and Clervie, and the final battle that ended with his life—those real moments that belonged to his entire life.

He instinctively tightened his grip on the necklace that awakened his past. At that moment, a gentle chill spread through his fingers.

Looking down, he saw an Vision, gleaming with a pale blue, cold light, materialize out of thin air in his hand, which was gripping the necklace.

"Speaking of which, Lin, if I want to use my memory ability in the future... do I have to shout that curse that will kill me?"

Of course not.

"Then why did you make me...?"

"I just felt that since the atmosphere was right, we should shout something."

"Your praise of Lin and your poignant recollections of her."

"Hey!"