After dinner, Shen Shuangjian went upstairs first. His room was located on the far right of the manor, with a large floor-to-ceiling window overlooking the manor's courtyard.
Shen Shuangjian she had forgotten her luggage when she went upstairs, so the others each carried two pieces and slowly carried them upstairs for her.
Shen Shuangjian thanked Yi Yi softly, then knelt on the plush carpet in front of the French windows, lost in thought.
What exactly needs to be done to be considered proactive?
Shen Shuangjian it really difficult to take any step towards anyone, whether it was the first or the last step. When he hesitated, it was actually a subtle way of giving up.
There was a knock on the open door. Shen Shuangjian lowered her eyes, looked at the door, and thanked them.
"Trouble..."
The last two words caught in her throat abruptly. Seeing the man pushing a suitcase at the door, Shen Shuangjian subconsciously stood up.
Xie Jinghui's deep-set eyes were softened by the dim light. He gazed quietly at Shen Shuangjian by the French windows for a long time before finally speaking.
"Sorry, I'm leaving."
Xie Jinghui pushed all the boxes into the house, lowered his eyes, took a step back, and grasped the handle, just about to close the door.
Mr. Xie...
Shen Shuangjian suddenly called out to him.
These three words, absent for two months, lingered in his ears again, burning into his heart with a scorching heat.
Xie Jinghui stopped almost surrendering, slowly turning around to look at his beloved who was avoiding his gaze.
"Thank you... Mr. Xie, would you like some water?"
Shen Shuangjian he still couldn't change his inarticulate manner.
He would never ask Xie Jinghui why she suddenly stopped talking to him, nor would he ever take a step beyond his comprehension.
But Shen Shuangjian would never realize that he never thought to ask others why he suddenly stopped getting close.
"What?"
Xie Jinghui raised her hand again, and closed the door as she stepped inside.
"What did you say."
Xie Jinghui gazed at the boy in front of the French windows, watching his eyelashes flutter as he softly repeated, "Do you... want some water?"
There will always be someone in this world who can understand Shen Shuangjian's inarticulate words, his irrelevant answers, and his insincerity.
When Shen Shuangjian his head, his smooth, long hair would always slip down his shoulders, covering his body and making him appear even thinner and more delicate.
He used only four simple words, yet they spoke volumes, enough for Xie Jinghui understand.
He always wanted to use a single sentence to make Xie Jinghui surrender and be completely helpless.
But Xie Jinghui understood. She understood his unspoken meaning, his current restraint and subtlety, and that he might not truly be resisting or avoiding her.
The most incomprehensible response was Shen Shuangjian, who never initiated conversations with anyone, to start a pointless chatter with him.
I don't drink water.
Xie Jinghui finally took a step, slowly approaching Shen Shuangjian. During this time, he took each step very slowly, carefully observing Shen Shuangjian's every expression.
But even as he approached Shen Shuangjian, Shen Shuangjian kept her eyes down, standing quietly in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows, waiting for him.
Like a frozen world, it finally granted him the right to let spring bloom.
Xie Jinghui had thought that he would be moved to tears by Shen Shuangjian's words and actions, and that he would feel a surge of joy or even be deeply touched.
But at this moment, he seemed to be controlled by fate, acting entirely according to his own heart, rather than trying to figure out Shen Shuangjian's personality to do what he wanted.
He thought he shouldn't ask Shen Shuangjian, nor should he give him a choice; he should just let him answer directly.
" Shen Shuangjian, I've said it before, I don't want to be unrelated to you."
Xie Jinghui closer and closer until the scent of agarwood gradually mingled with the faint, cool fragrance. Only then did Shen Shuangjian notice and remember to step back.
Xie Jinghui lowered her eyes to observe his every expression, like a puppet being manipulated by intense love and desire.
I want to hold your hand, but if you really want to reject me, you can turn away.
Xie Jinghui's trembling fingertips slowly and gently enveloped Shen Shuangjian's slender hand.
But at this moment, Xie Jinghui inevitably thought of the scene at the dinner table just now, when Shen Shuangjian him with those amorous, brown eyes, which seemed to hold a thousand unspoken words that gently touched his heart.
I want to hug you, but if you feel I can't, you can turn away.
Xie Jinghui's voice was too close, deep and alluringly gentle. Every time he spoke, it wasn't a question, but rather an Shen Shuangjian to answer with his actions.
If you don't want to, you can avoid it. It's not about whether you can or can't, or why, but whether you're willing to.
When the tall, slender figure approached, Shen Shuangjian trapped and clenched her hands tightly. Shen Shuangjian shy about such a direct embrace, without any preconditions, just a simple hug.
He instinctively tried to curl his knees up, covering his eyes with his hands as he tried to squat down, but inevitably fell into Xie Jinghui's embrace.
At this moment, Xie Jinghui finally grasped the last part that he had been pondering but could never figure out.
He used to love Shen Shuangjian too sensitively, too painfully, and too humbly. So, at the last moment, Xie Jinghui lost the ability to recognize her true feelings.
It turns out that the reason he could not see the end even after walking ninety-nine steps towards Shen Shuangjian was not because he could not reach the illusory hundredth step.
It was because, at the very beginning, Shen Shuangjian had taken a step back from everyone.
Therefore, he cannot just walk a hundred steps; to get closer to Shen Shuangjian, he must walk the full one hundred and one steps.
" Shen Shuangjian, tell me..."
If you can allow me to cross those boundaries.
"What's your nickname that you didn't tell me?"
Xie Jinghui will regain all her confidence and courage, and no matter how hard she is pushed, she will never let go again.
Shame, unease, and the fear of the unknown rippled through Shen Shuangjian's senses and her conditioned reflex of reason.
He slumped onto the soft plush carpet. Xie Jinghui's embrace was so broad that it almost completely encircled Shen Shuangjian, bringing a long-lost gentleness and indulgence.
Tell me, I'm begging you.
At that moment, her slender white fingers, tinged with a faint red, almost uncontrollably gripped Xie Jinghui's sleeve.
Shen Shuangjian was even on the verge of tears, his shyness and restraint made him blush with embarrassment, but he still spoke up in a low voice.
"Only... Zhizhi."
He was both ashamed and afraid, yet as if tempted, he uttered those two words.
Zhizhi, Shen Zhizhi.
Xie Jinghui a soft, almost sighing laugh; he could feel Shen Shuangjian trembling.
So he slowly let go, filled with the joy of regaining what he had lost and the satisfaction of having his wish fulfilled.
Xie Jinghui gently lifted Shen Shuangjian refused to lift. When he saw the mist in her affectionate eyes, his voice was hoarse, carrying a low, soothing tone.
" Shen Shuangjian, I want to kiss you now. If you refuse, I will accept."
The boundaries that had been crossed made Xie Jinghui no longer want to give Shen Shuangjian a chance to choose, but instead let him decide the final two paths.
If Shen Shuangjian says no, he will continue to wait.
If he chooses to remain silent, then Xie Jinghui will cross the final line.
Make up for that night when, in his most passionate moment, he only dared to place a kiss through his own hand.
" Shen Shuangjian, you're not going to refuse?"
Xie Jinghui's sudden approach and aggressive attacks were too fierce. Shen Shuangjian unable to defend herself, yet she could not find an opening to refuse.
The blush on his face had spread from behind his ears to the side of his neck. Shen Shuangjian avoid him, tilting her head back, but couldn't utter a single word.
Xie Jinghui deciphered the implication in his reaction.
For someone who gets shy even thinking about saying "I love you," a direct kiss is too much; Shen Shuangjian might even be so embarrassed that she'd cry.
The next second, Xie Jinghui braced himself against the glass window behind Shen Shuangjian, leaned down and planted a delicate kiss on her without hesitation.
Just now, Shen Shuangjian's reaction showed shyness, fear, and unease, but not resistance.
He couldn't accept it, yet he was willing to accept it.
Xie Jinghui would never receive a kiss in return, so he chose to always take the initiative to approach Shen Shuangjian.
Whether it's the hundredth step, the hundred and first step, or the thousandth step, or the ten thousandth step, even if this road has no end, and is a wordless book with endless pages, it doesn't matter.
But as long as he is willing to grant Xie Jinghui access, Xie Jinghui will never stop.
He was forever willing to drown in this boundless sea of suffering that intoxicated him.
" Shen Shuangjian, it's snowing."
Xie Jinghui raised her hand and gently wiped away a tear from the corner of Shen Shuangjian's eye.
"I've always forgotten to mention that when I first met you, my world went blank for ten seconds—that was the process of falling in love with you."
Just like the first snowfall in Moscow right now.
Xie Jinghui's love was like falling snow; it was delicate and silent, and it would never stop. By the time it was discovered, the snow had already fallen quite thickly.
He triggered an avalanche, causing chaos, and only when Shen Shuangjian close could he willingly melt.
Just as the long night ends and the day begins.
He fell madly in love.