Buying a home deep in the mountains? You've really earned that Great Emperor of Holy Water title!

At noon the next day, in Jinghai University's second dining hall.

The morning's military training had just ended, and the dining hall buzzed with voices.

Ruan Qingwu carefully threaded her way through the crowded aisle.

Lin Bei followed behind her, carrying two meals and still looking half asleep.

"Qingwu, over here!"

At a window seat not far away, Zhao Mengyao stood up and waved excitedly.

Beside her sat Lin Ruoxue, wearing black-framed glasses.

The four shared a table.

Lin Bei set a large serving of oil-braised prawns in the middle of the table, keeping only a bowl of plain rice and a plate of stir-fried bok choy in front of himself.

Once the two sat down, Zhao Mengyao's eyes kept darting slyly over Lin Bei.

She had insisted on dragging Lin Ruoxue along for lunch today precisely to vet him for her campus-belle best friend.

After all, from the first day of school, she had noticed that this campus-belle cabbage, Ruan Qingwu, had already had her soul stolen by the boy before her.

She wanted to see just what magic Lin Bei possessed besides a handsome face.

But Lin Bei paid no attention whatsoever to her scrutiny, concentrating only on peeling the prawns in front of him.

Whenever he finished one, he casually dropped it into the white porcelain bowl before Ruan Qingwu.

Without even standing on ceremony, Ruan Qingwu naturally picked it up with her chopsticks and popped it into her mouth.

The whole sequence flowed like drifting clouds and running water.

The one peeling the prawns didn't think he was currying favor, and the one eating them didn't feel embarrassed.

It was as though this was how they had spent the past eighteen years.

Watching them, Zhao Mengyao felt the flames of gossip blazing in her heart.

"Lin Bei, let me interview you."

"I heard you and our Qingwu are childhood sweethearts?"

Lin Bei continued peeling prawns without even looking up. "Pretty much. We grew up running around bare-bottomed in the same courtyard."

Ruan Qingwu was drinking soup and nearly choked at his words. Under the table, she gave Lin Bei a kick, neither too hard nor too soft, a faint blush rising to her cheeks.

Zhao Mengyao chuckled, leaned forward, and launched into a series of probing questions.

"Then how would you soothe Qingwu if she got angry someday? Our Qingwu is stubborn. Not just anyone can coax her out of it."

Lin Bei took off his gloves and wiped his hands with a wet wipe, answering casually, "What's so hard about that? When she gets angry, I generally don't have to do anything."

Zhao Mengyao frowned, about to say that his answer was far too clueless, when Lin Bei continued.

"She finds a handy weapon herself. My main job is checking how many minutes the ambulance will take, and figuring out whether playing dead or running away would be quicker."

"Pfft-" Lin Ruoxue couldn't hold it in and burst out laughing.

Both angry and embarrassed, Ruan Qingwu reached over and pinched Lin Bei's waist.

"What nonsense are you talking about! Since when was I that violent!"

Lin Bei caught her wrist, pressed her back into her seat, and stuffed another prawn into her mouth to cut her off.

Watching the pair interact as though no one else existed, Zhao Mengyao nodded inwardly.

The guy had decent emotional intelligence. In just a few sentences, he had turned a potentially awkward question into playful flirting.

But she wasn't about to let Lin Bei off so easily.

"All right, you pass." Zhao Mengyao leaned forward a little and tossed out her second question. "What about the future? Any plans after graduation? Staying in Jinghai to build your career?"

Lin Bei lifted his eyelids. "Depends. I'll stay wherever feels comfortable."

That answer was far too perfunctory.

Zhao Mengyao decided to bring out her trump card and cut straight to practical matters.

"Jinghai is comfortable, sure, but housing prices aren't low. If you want to marry Qingwu someday, you can't expect her to live in a rental with you, can you? Where do you plan to buy a home?"

The question was rather pointed.

Ruan Qingwu frowned slightly and wanted to speak up to help Lin Bei out.

She knew Lin Bei's family's circumstances. Jinghai's housing prices really were astronomical for an ordinary family.

But Lin Bei didn't hesitate at all.

"Why buy a home? Jinghai's a lousy place, with bad air and traffic jams. I'm planning to get myself a blessed grotto-heaven someday and live deep in the mountains. Good air, a longer life, and no property management fees."

The table instantly fell silent.

Zhao Mengyao and Lin Ruoxue exchanged looks, both seeing utter bewilderment in the other's eyes.

What blessed grotto-heaven? What deep mountains? Do you think you're an immortal cultivator?

Zhao Mengyao rolled her eyes hard. Handsome though Lin Bei was, she felt that not a single honest word came out of his mouth. He was far too unreliable.

But then she turned to look at Ruan Qingwu.

This girl, acknowledged throughout the university as a campus belle, didn't seem to think Lin Bei was boasting at all.

Instead, a sweet smile curled her lips, as though she were seriously considering the possibility of going off into the mountains to live like a savage someday.

Hopeless.

Zhao Mengyao wailed inwardly. This silly girl had fallen completely.

Just as Zhao Mengyao was about to continue questioning him, a sleazy voice came from beside them.

"Oh, Qingwu. What a coincidence."

The voice was greasy, with a deliberately affected tone.

Lin Bei didn't even look up. The sound alone told him who had arrived.

Zhou Zihao.

Today, the guy had changed into a white bespoke casual suit, his hair combed so slick and shiny that even a fly landing on it would do the splits.

Four lackeys trailed behind him, completing his grand entrance.

Yesterday on the training field, Zhang Liang had failed to make a fool of Lin Bei and had instead broken his own front teeth in a fall.

Zhou Zihao had been so angry he hadn't slept well all night.

But "back down" wasn't in Young Master Zhou's vocabulary.

Running into Ruan Qingwu in the dining hall now was the perfect opportunity to regain face.

After all, there were no instructors around, and with his status as Young Master Zhou, he had to reclaim his ground somehow.

Zhou Zihao walked up to the table, ignored Zhao Mengyao and Lin Ruoxue, and fixed his gaze directly on Ruan Qingwu.

"Qingwu, how can you eat this dining hall food? I've booked a table at a Michelin restaurant outside campus. Come with me?"

Ruan Qingwu didn't even glance at him and continued drinking her soup with her head lowered.

Ignored in public, Zhou Zihao's face twitched, and he took all his anger out on Lin Bei.

He walked over beside Lin Bei and tapped the table, looming over him.

"Brat, I want this seat. Move."

His tone was arrogant, as though no one else mattered.

The four followers behind him immediately edged closer, looking ready to throw punches at the slightest disagreement.

Startled, Zhao Mengyao and Lin Ruoxue instinctively shrank back.

The other students eating in the dining hall noticed the commotion too, putting down their chopsticks to watch.

Yet there wasn't the slightest trace of humiliated anger on Lin Bei's face. He leisurely picked up the chilled cola on the table and took a sip.

"I was wondering who was making such a grand entrance."

Leaning back in his chair, Lin Bei looked at Zhou Zihao with a faint, ambiguous smile. "Well, if it isn't Jinghai University's famous Great Emperor of Holy Water. What, out for a spin today? Haven't crapped your pants?"

"Pfft-"

A boy drinking soup at the next table sprayed it straight out.

"Holy shit! The Great Emperor of Holy Water! I remember now!"

"He's that rich kid who crapped his pants yesterday!"

"Quick, quick, get away from him before he blows again!"

The nearby students who had heard of the Great Emperor of Holy Water couldn't hold back and erupted into laughter.

Those who didn't know the story were soon filled in by their neighbors and doubled over laughing too.

The arrogance on Zhou Zihao's face instantly froze.

The title "Great Emperor of Holy Water" brutally dragged his most unbearable memory back into the open.

The extreme humiliation instantly turned his eyes red.

"You're fucking dead!"

Humiliated and furious, Zhou Zihao abruptly stepped forward, raising his hands to flip the table in front of Lin Bei.

At the very instant he exerted himself.

Under the table, Lin Bei casually curled a finger on his right hand.

A girl at the next table had accidentally spilled a cup of orange juice earlier, leaving a small yellow puddle right beside Zhou Zihao's feet.

With a slight shift of Lin Bei's thoughts, Spiritual Power instantly changed the position of that puddle of orange juice.

Zhou Zihao's foot, clad in a limited-edition sneaker, landed directly on it.

Before he could finish shouting his threat, his foot suddenly slipped without warning.

"Sliiip-"

Zhou Zihao lost his balance completely, his legs flying into an exaggerated full split in midair.

"Rrrip!"

The crisp sound of tearing fabric rang out especially harshly in the noisy dining hall.

His white Gucci casual trousers, worth several thousand, split wide open at the crotch.

Zhou Zihao landed in a solid full split, slamming heavily onto the floor.

The impact strained the tendons along his inner thighs, hurting so badly that tears shot from his eyes.

But that wasn't the worst of it.

Even better, his split had planted him right in the yellow puddle of orange juice.

His white trousers instantly soaked it all up.

From the onlookers' angle, Zhou Zihao lay sprawled on the floor, his legs spread wide.

And across the crotch of his torn white trousers, a large, glaring yellow stain was spreading.

The entire dining hall instantly fell silent.

A full two seconds passed.

"Holy shit! He pissed himself again!"

Someone shouted at the top of their lungs, their voice filled with incredulous shock.

That shout instantly sent the dining hall into an uproar.

"My God! Has his fucking sphincter completely lost control?"

"Crapped his pants yesterday, pissed himself in public today. What the hell happened to this guy?"

"That's disgusting! Hurry, take a picture and post it on the university Tieba! I've already got the title: 'Shocking! The Great Emperor of Holy Water retreats from court a second time, flooding Golden Mountain in the dining hall!'"

"Urgh-I'm about to throw up the braised pork I just ate!"

The watching students covered their noses and backed away, staring at Zhou Zihao on the floor with disgust all over their faces.

Countless phones rose, flashes going off nonstop amid a chorus of clicks.

Lying on the floor, Zhou Zihao's head buzzed.

The searing pain in his inner thighs mingled with the mockery around him, utterly shattering his psychological defenses.

He lowered his head to look at the yellow stain across his crotch and felt as though he had been struck by lightning.

"N-no... it's not... it's a drink! It's a drink!"

Zhou Zihao struggled desperately to stand up and explain.

To everyone else, his furious, bedraggled state looked exactly like someone lashing out in humiliation after wetting his pants.

"Young Master Zhou! Young Master Zhou, are you all right?"

Only then did the four followers snap out of their daze and rush forward in a flurry of limbs, suppressing their disgust as they hauled Zhou Zihao off the floor.

Zhou Zihao clamped both hands over his crotch, not even daring to raise his head.

"Go! Hurry!"

Gritting his teeth, he squeezed the words out between them and, supported by his followers, scrambled out of the dining hall like a beaten stray.