Although Robert hadn't played many games, he knew a little about them.
That's a simulation game, which is essentially a simulation of real-world scenarios.
But apart from the clothing and decor, which barely suggested it was a hospital, everything else had absolutely nothing to do with medicine.
Who's the kind person who uses a chainsaw during surgery?
Besides, even if the rescue fails, you can't just dump someone into the pit with a thud, can you?
After just watching this absurd opening animation, Robert understood something.
That means you were wrong.
This lousy game isn't a realistic hospital simulation at all.
This is a parody game!
The title screen is even more baffling.
A complete skull is divided into four parts by some kind of dotted lines that resemble cutting lines.
Each of these corresponds to one of four different options.
[Continue Game], [Start New Game], [Load Save], and [Exit Game].
But this title screen is just a bit too bizarre.
Is this some kind of plan where he chooses one piece and then just saws that piece off?
How is this different from slaughter?
Robert rubbed his temples in exasperation.
There are just too many flaws.
Perhaps this is what a hospital looks like in the imagination of a group of nerdy programmers in their studio?
Don't underestimate medicine, you bunch of bastards!
Well, anyway, it's just a game after all.
Robert silently chose to start a new game.
As with any game, the beginning naturally involves adjusting some basic settings.
The player's name, difficulty selection, and whether this is their first time playing, etc.
Just like GAMENOVA's consistent approach since the Wolfenstein 3D era, the difficulty wasn't directly presented through so-called...
The terms "simple", "ordinary", and "difficult" are used to represent these qualities.
Instead, it is presented in the form of job titles.
Interns, physicians, and senior consultant physicians.
Since this is my first time playing, I really don't understand what's going on with this game.
Choosing a high-difficulty level rashly is very unwise.
After much deliberation, Robert chose the default physician difficulty level.
Surprisingly, Theme Hospital is not a sandbox game like SimCity.
At least not entirely.
It is divided into multiple levels, rather than a fixed map that you play through all the way to the end.
The first level is called Gas Town, which makes it really hard to feel at ease.
Welcome to your first hospital!
[First, a reception desk should be set up, a general examination room should be built, and a receptionist and a doctor should be hired. Then----]
Designing a beautifully crafted tutorial like Pokémon is no easy feat for a simulation game.
An excessive amount of complex and redundant information can easily lead to a lack of information if players are guided through soft methods.
For this type of game, sometimes a sufficiently detailed tutorial is better.
Otherwise, you'll end up like some Paradox Interactive Air Combat or some World War II war criminal, spending two hours and still not understanding the basic game mechanics, only to end up having to look up guides online.
The objective of the first level is not complicated.
You only need to cure 10 patients and keep your reputation above 200.
Although it was Robert's first time doing this, a mere 10 patients were a case that any small clinic could easily handle.
"Okay, let me see what's going on. The first hurdle is probably just minor illnesses like colds and fevers, right?"
Following the tutorial, Robert built a reception desk and hired reception staff.
The hiring interface is more complex than I imagined. Different employees even have their own character portraits and names, and their attributes seem to be different as well.
Just considering this aspect alone, its richness is astonishing.
However, the tutorial didn't tell him how to choose, and since he couldn't understand it anyway, he just randomly picked the one with the lowest salary.
Next up is the diagnostic room.
Doctors will diagnose patients here and determine specific treatment plans.
Hey----it really does feel a bit like running your own clinic.
"Ideally, the patient should be able to reach the examination room via the shortest route after registering. Let's place it next to the room; that would make the flow of movement more efficient. Then—"
That's how simulation management games are; perhaps in some unexpected moment, a player will inadvertently fall into it.
What followed was an intense and obsessive addiction.
Robert has already gotten completely absorbed in making plans, even before he's done anything himself.
He had seen the hospitals and clinics owned by his partners' families and knew roughly what they should look like.
I glanced at the list and saw that in addition to the general diagnostic rooms, there were also advanced diagnostic rooms.
Judging from the equipment on display, this place is likely used to diagnose complex conditions that cannot be confirmed through routine observation and questioning.
Robert didn't rush to build all the rooms at once.
The initial capital was not much, only 50,000 yuan.
Without knowing what the future needs might be, Robert preferred to build the necessary things first and get the clinic up and running as quickly as possible.
Once the cash flow stabilizes, expansion will be a piece of cake.
Pharmacy, restrooms, benches for resting, wards with IV drip beds----
After a simple planning process, the hospital began to look more professional.
With his construction completed, the hospital finally welcomed its first patient.
A simple diagnosis revealed, unsurprisingly, that it was just a common cold.
He can just go to the pharmacy across from the examination room and get some medicine; that will solve the problem.
At least up to this point, everything is still quite normal.
Robert finally breathed a sigh of relief.
"Okay, it seems I misunderstood them. Although the opening animation was funny, the game itself is quite decent."
The entire treatment process is very meticulous; either the doctor personally visits the hospital to investigate, or the team has professional physicians providing guidance.
"Ding-dong"
A message pop-up window suddenly appeared in the lower left corner of the screen.
According to his assistant, this is a list of various notifications he has received, some of which require him to make decisions on his own.
The notification is not presented as a typical message pop-up.
It was a fax machine labeled "[Hospital Asset]".
The notification is displayed above in fax format.
[John Carmack, the producer of Gamenova, wishes to visit your hospital!]
[Invitation extended to VIP guests]
[Making excuses to prevent VIPs from visiting]
What else is there to say? Let's invite him to come and take a look.
Your employee has been diagnosed with a new disease.
It is Excessive Nose Hair ).
[Cause - Frequently looking down on people who are inferior to oneself.]
[Symptom - Excessively long and bushy nose hairs, almost like a bird's nest.]
What is all this nonsense?
There's no such thing as Excessive Nose Hair!
The treatment plan shown below is even more outrageous.
[Treatment - Oral administration of an unpleasant hair removal agent, which is prepared by a nurse at the pharmacy]
The symptoms are minor and can be cured with medication, so there's no need to build extra clinics.
"Watching Carmack walk into the ward and drink a bottle of brightly colored, seemingly dangerous-looking liquid, he was actually cured."
Robert then realized that he might have relaxed too soon.
The seemingly normal part at the beginning of the game was probably designed to lull him into a false sense of security.
They've started making up diseases that don't even exist!
"Okay, at least it's somewhat plausible; some people do have more abundant nose hairs."
However, in this situation, he usually recommends just trimming it with nose hair clippers.
Oral hair removal products are really...
Attention! One patient has a head as large as a watermelon and requires emergency surgery!
Please have the doctor go to the inflator.
Two sweet female voices announced something, followed by a notification tone for a new message.
"Ding-dong"
Your employee has been diagnosed with a new disease.
[It's Bloaty Head ]
"Uh... that makes sense. Sometimes my head does get a little throbbing, like it is right now."
[Cause of illness - smelling spoiled cheese and drinking unclean rainwater.]
[Symptoms - Very uncomfortable.]
[Treatment - Break open the swollen head and use an air pump to restore the head to normal.]
Robert silently observed the examination room.
The patient's head was swollen wider than his shoulders, looking like an inflated balloon.
The doctor in charge of treating him reached into his pocket, pulled out a needle, and mercilessly jabbed it into the patient's head.
Dude, this is blatant murder!
He committed murder in broad daylight!
He used a steel pestle to stab a hole in someone's head!
The head, poked like a balloon bursting, deflated and drooped against the patient's chest.
The doctor calmly walked up to the machine and pulled out a rubber tube.
"Gulp----"
Robert swallowed hard.
He built this machine not long ago, and he still remembers its name.
[Air inflator]
What exactly is this thing trying to do?
The doctor simply shoved the nozzle directly into the patient's deflated head and mouth.
The next moment, his head instantly swelled up to the size of a normal person.
"Healed? Healed?"
Even Robert, who was usually very composed, couldn't stay calm at this moment.
This guy just does whatever comes to mind!
Aside from the initial cold and hemorrhoids, what did the subsequent symptoms have to do with reality?
Who in their right mind would treat someone by first poking a hole in their head with a pestle, then inflating it with an air pump?
Okay, okay, anyway, at least the game's foundation is good.
Although these symptoms are all fictional, they are surprisingly fun to play.
Especially since these guys always deliver a bunch of nonsensical lines with a straight face.
Robert really liked this dry humor.
Although he was usually regarded as a very serious, even old-fashioned, guy.
But to be honest, Robert is actually just a guy who's cold on the outside but warm on the inside.
This dry, British-style humor hit him perfectly in his area of strength.
"Please don't let the patient die in the hallway!" --- Pfft!