The Immortal Master Knows Best

In a Taoist temple deep in the mountains, beneath a goose-yellow lamplight, a man was talking to a cat:

"Why did you run out?"

"Ran out to eat meat!"

"You've barely got any skills. What would you do if you ran into danger?"

"Side-Swept Bangs! Clever!"

"I couldn't tell." Chen Du pointed an accusing finger at him. "And I told you, you can't go asking for meat whenever you please. I'll buy it for you."

"Can eat it! Just go eat!"

"That costs money!"

"No money! Just go eat!"

"You stubborn mule!"

"Stubborn mule! You!"

The cat's voice was thin and clear, but stubborn.

If anyone from the foot of the mountain had stumbled upon this scene and heard those words, who knew how they would have felt?

"Anyway, remember this: don't go asking other people for meat anymore."

"Didn't ask! Went there and got some!"

"If something like this happens again, don't run off on your own unless I tell you to. It could be dangerous." Chen Du sighed helplessly. "At least you came back."

"Side-Swept Bangs! Amazing!"

"In that case, tell me what happened after you went down there."

"Can't tell!"

What a brazenly self-assured illiterate!

"Take your time."

"Side-Swept Bangs, ate meat, finished at one house, ate at another, Yunzi, inside the house, clang clang, door shut, wouldn't let me in, door wouldn't open, Side-Swept Bangs clever, on the roof..."

As the cat told his story, a picture gradually formed in Chen Du's mind.

This was a good chance to learn what the monster and Yunzhi could do, and catch a glimpse of what monsters and magic from real legends were like.

Yunzhi had returned to the outskirts of the town.

Dressed in ancient robes and carrying a longsword, she naturally exuded an otherworldly, valiant air. Now that she stood here again, she was brimming with confidence.

The bustle had faded and the night was growing late. There was no audience here, only the bright moon hanging overhead and a few stray dogs that had followed her.

The temple doors could be opened again now.

"Thank you, fellow Taoists, for coming to my aid earlier. There's no need now. Tomorrow, I'll ask the immortal master for some magic money and buy meat to thank you all."

Once again, she entered the temple. Once again, the doors slammed shut, plunging it into darkness. But Yunzhi no longer felt any fear.

Though the immortal master was not beside her and there was no incantation for the treasured sword, out of reverence for something mysterious and profound, she held it up respectfully and said, "Yunzhi acts on the immortal master's orders and humbly asks the treasured sword to reveal its divine might and help me subdue the monster and vanquish the fiend."

Clang! The treasured sword left its sheath!

A sheet of white frost immediately swept across the floor, hard to distinguish from sword light or moonlight leaking through the roof. The early spring night grew noticeably colder, and a keen edge spread through the wind. She even watched several strands of her hair fall away in the breeze, and saw paper-money ashes drifting past her face silently split in two by an invisible force.

Now!

The woman spun around and swung her sword.

Her mamianqun skirt bloomed like a flower, and dust spread across the floor. The monster, already drained of strength, seemed to sense the killing intent:

"This door does not..."

Before it could finish speaking, the sword frost had reached it.

There was scarcely a sound, like a thin blade slicing through coarse paper or the tip of a needle piercing tofu. Then came a piercing howl.

Boom! A cloud of black smoke erupted from the temple doors, and within it, a black spider as wide as the doors themselves faintly appeared.

"I knew it..."

Yunzhi spoke calmly. With the treasured sword in hand, she seemed to have gained the bearing of a master:

"I told you long ago that the immortal master possesses vast divine powers and boundless magic. Even if it isn't a good time for him to come down the mountain these days, he has plenty of ways to deal with you. Why don't you surrender at once and come back with me to beg the immortal master's forgiveness? With his magnanimity, he'll surely pardon you."

"I am the door god..."

The spider shouted hoarsely, but was already extremely weak.

"You still dare resist!"

Yunzhi frowned deeply and suddenly blew a puff of green smoke at it.

"Whoosh..."

The spider's eyes immediately glazed over. No one knew what it dreamed of, but it actually shrank of its own accord, becoming an ordinary-sized spider.

"As expected, a great tree offers good shade, and an immortal at your back makes monsters easy to catch. A breeze."

Not long afterward, in the temple courtyard.

"Yunzhi has not failed the immortal master's trust. I've injured the monster and brought it back. How would you like to deal with it, immortal master?"

Yunzhi opened her right hand, revealing a spider sitting squarely on her fair, tender palm.

The spider occupied about half her palm and was dark in color. Its distinctive feature was the flat end of its abdomen, which resembled a round door. It even had golden patterns on it, much like the decorations on a door.

Aside from his own cat, this was the first time Chen Du had seen a monster's true form, and he could not help finding it novel.

Besides that, he was also surprised-

Did that sword really have the power to subdue monsters and vanquish fiends?

"Back in my time, I called this kind of spider a trapdoor spider. It's good at digging, and its burrow is usually underground, with a door on top that can open and close naturally. Its abdomen can also serve as a door," Yunzhi explained to the immortal master. "I used an illusion to trick it into using its transformation technique. It's currently been shrunk by that technique. Its true form is as big as a door and can fill a small room."

That big? How had it fit inside the stone box?

Chen Du was curious about that, but for now he only nodded and said, "Mm. It should also have an extraordinary bloodline flowing through its body."

"Really?" Yunzhi thought for a moment before saying, "I didn't know that. But when I fought it, I discovered that not only was the door on its rear indestructible, it also seemed to have a divine ability that could send anything entering the door back exactly as it came."

"That's it, then."

The words on the jade plaque really didn't deceive me.

"That makes sense. It isn't very intelligent. I tried several times to use your prestigious name to persuade it to behave and come back with me, but it couldn't understand. I was wondering how it had become a spirit. If it's because of its bloodline, that would explain it."

"..."

"Have you decided how to deal with it, immortal master? Should I dispel the illusion so you can seal it away?"

"Seal it for now."

"Yes!"

Yunzhi immediately dispelled the illusion and tossed the spider from her hand.

To her surprise, the monster looked clumsy, but reacted with incredible speed. Before it hit the ground or revealed its true form, it flew swiftly outward and, with a boom, crashed headfirst into the temple gate.

The spider revealed its enormous, fearsome true form and collapsed on the ground, fluid still oozing from the wound on its rear. The wooden gate had broken apart under the impact.

"I'm finished..."

Yunzhi stood frozen, her face pale with fright.

The temple gate had been smashed. Wouldn't the immortal master punish her severely now?

She promptly came to her senses and hurried forward with her sword.

"Use this."

Chen Du handed Yunzhi the jade plaque.

"Hiss!"

Yunzhi took it instinctively, then immediately acted as though she had grabbed a branding iron. It felt scorching hot, and she began tossing it back and forth between her hands as she approached the spider like a juggler.

The spider's eyes were open. Whether it had seen the suppression jade plaque or Chen Du with the seal on him, all eight of its eyes showed fear plain to see.

"Spare me! Spare me! I am the door god!"

"Huh? You know how to be afraid and beg for mercy?"

Hearing it plead, Yunzhi stopped and looked at Chen Du while continuing to toss the jade plaque.

She could not help thinking that her cultivation was still lacking and her virtue insufficient. Borrowed authority was never truly her own. Poor her: she had racked her brains for a clever plan and worn out her tongue, yet failed to persuade it. But as soon as the immortal master appeared, he made it gain intelligence and obediently bow its head and beg for mercy.

The immortal master remained perfectly calm and said to it, "If I spare you, you'll just go down the mountain and cause trouble again."

"Eat sheep! Eat sheep!"

"You've got some nerve, falsely calling yourself a door god and demanding sacrifices, and you still refuse to change your ways. No wonder the patriarch sentenced you to a hundred years of suppression," Chen Du said. "If you'd run into the Taoist masters of the Talisman School, you'd have died long ago."

"I am the door god!"

Its voice was as clumsy and guileless as ever.

"With brains like yours, you could sit at the same table as Side-Swept Bangs, and you still want to eat sheep."

"Door god! Eat sheep!"

"How will you deal with it, immortal master?"

Beside them, a woman of breathtaking beauty was still juggling.

"Spare me! Spare me!"

The spider's eyes were full of awe and fear.

Chen Du fell silent and pondered.

By rights, the patriarch had sentenced it to a hundred years of suppression. Now that it had escaped, it was hard to say whether those hundred years had passed. Judging by the look of it, even if Chen Du asked how many years it had been sealed, it probably wouldn't be able to answer. But considering the unusual nature of this era, Chen Du really ought to put it back under seal.

At the very least, he couldn't let it go down the mountain now.

Sometimes a fool could be no less dangerous than a villain.

Even sealing it for a while and releasing it once he felt enough time had passed and spiritual energy had revived would be better than simply letting it go.

That was right. Because Chen Du had stamped it again, he judged that the "hundred years" in "a hundred years of suppression" might have started counting over, so he would have to release it himself when the time came.

But the gate it had smashed before him had happened to give Chen Du an idea, leading him to consider something else.

A clumsy, guileless monster; its awe and fear of him; the confidence given him by the several "mountain god stone talismans" he now carried; the need to keep the temple's only monster in check; and the need to strengthen the temple's defenses against monsters that might still escape from the mountain;

And even the gate it had smashed!