The Top's Little Thoughts (10,000 Words)
"There's something in the backpack. Let's open it together and have a look."
Tao Qiu set the cubs on the stone bench so they could see inside the backpack.
He pulled open the zipper, and the first thing he saw was a small first-aid kit taking up one corner of the backpack. Tao Qiu lifted it out and undid the clasp, revealing bandages, rubbing alcohol, and several packets of medical cotton swabs inside.
They were sorted into separate compartments. Several were empty, though he didn't know whether they had always been empty or their contents had been used up or taken away.
The missing items were most likely first-aid medicines useful in the wild. If the man had taken them, perhaps he had been afraid Tao Qiu wouldn't know how to use them or would misuse them and poison himself to death.
The man probably didn't know he had powerful healing abilities, or he wouldn't have given him these things.
After briefly explaining what the items were for to the cubs, Tao Qiu set the kit aside.
Next, Tao Qiu pulled out a cloth bag. He loosened its drawstring and found it full of food.
Tao Qiu took everything out one by one.
First came strips of dried meat packed separately in clear plastic bags. Each strip was two fingers thick and felt rather hard in his hand.
Tao Qiu tore open the seal, and a familiar aroma wafted out. Only humans would know to gather so many spices to make a single dish.
The little bird cubs smelled it too. It was their first encounter with an aroma that so stimulated their sense of smell, but rather than finding it unpleasant, they began to drool.
"Chirp, chirp?" Second Cub was the first to give in.
That meat smells so good. Can I eat it?
"You can." Tao Qiu trusted that the man wouldn't harm him.
The dried meat was hard, but not so hard that it couldn't be torn apart. He pulled it apart with two fingers, revealing the clear grain of the meat.
Tao Qiu couldn't tell what animal the meat came from.
He fed the torn strips to the three cubs and ate one himself.
The moment it entered his mouth, the complex aroma seemed to carry Tao Qiu back to his previous life.
Back then, the world had been largely peaceful, and humans had still stood at the top of the food chain. Though he had quite a few little troubles, he had more happiness than anything else.
His grandparents had kept him company as a child. They had passed away after he grew up, leaving him without familial love, but he had still had no worries about food or clothing, and his grades had been good. His future had looked bright.
If his parents hadn't discovered his sexual orientation, if they hadn't argued and fought over it that day, if he hadn't tried to stop them and hadn't been shoved down by them, would everything have been different?
Human life was sometimes just that fragile. The back of his head had merely struck the corner of a table when he fell, and he had even forgotten whether it hurt.
By the time he opened his eyes again, the world was completely different.
His parents had given birth to him, had not loved him, and had indirectly killed him.
Both his birth and his death seemed so absurd and unnecessary.
Tao Qiu was so deep in his memories that he completely forgot when and where he was.
It wasn't until the cubs called out to him.
"Chirp!"
Dad!
Tao Qiu abruptly came to his senses. Looking down, he saw the bird cubs staring at him, their eyes full of shock and worry.
Third Cub jumped down from the stone bench and flapped her wings, flying unsteadily toward Tao Qiu.
The cubs weren't yet used to flying. Afraid she would fall, Tao Qiu hurriedly reached out and caught her.
Third Cub steadied herself in Tao Qiu's palm, the worry on her face undiminished. "Chirp, chirp?"
Dad, why are you crying?
"Ah..." Only when Third Cub said that did Tao Qiu realize his face was icy cold. He raised a hand to wipe it, and the remaining tears immediately wet his fingers.
For a moment, Tao Qiu was at a loss.
He had actually cried, for himself in his previous life.
The pain of his previous life had not, after all, been worn away by time. The memories were still vivid enough to hurt.
He had simply chosen to deliberately suppress them before, yet now they had burst forth because of a strip of dried meat.
The cubs didn't know the pain in Tao Qiu's heart. They only knew that Dad definitely wasn't crying because he was happy, because his expression was so very, very sad.
Second Cub's thoughts were simple. Seeing that Dad had cried after eating the dried meat, she said foolishly, "Chirp, chirp, chirp? Chirp, chirp, chirp!"
Did Dad cry because the meat tasted so bad? Then I don't like it either. I won't eat it anymore!
As she spoke, she made to spit out the rest of the dried meat. Fortunately, Tao Qiu stopped her in time.
"No, the dried meat is delicious. Dad just remembered some things from before and felt sad, so he cried."
Tao Qiu's heart softened, and he also found it funny. His cubs were so sincere and loved him so much.
Eldest Cub's gaze grew grave. "Chirp, chirp?"
Did bad guys bully Dad before?
Chapter 30: The Top's Little Thoughts (10,000 Words)
Tao Qiu thought for a moment, then told them the truth. "Yes, bad guys bullied Dad."
"Chirp!" Second Cub reacted most fiercely. "Chirp, chirp! Chirp, chirp? Chirp, chirp!"
What?! Bad guys dared to bully Dad! Where are they? I'll go beat them to death!
Eldest Cub and Third Cub also looked at Tao Qiu with determination, wearing solemn expressions that said, "If you start the fight, I'll follow."
Tao Qiu was both touched and charmed by how cute the cubs were. He stroked their fluffy little heads and said, "The bad guys are gone. We can't find them anymore. Sweethearts, you can help Dad by cursing them a few times."
"Chirp, chirp?" Third Cub was confused.
Did the bad guys die?
"Maybe," Tao Qiu said. "Either way, we'll never see them again."
Tao Qiu wasn't sure whether he was now on the same Earth, in the same world, as before. But it no longer mattered. Even if he was, so many years had passed that his parents would have died long ago.
"Chirp." Second Cub was very disappointed that she couldn't avenge Dad. She said fiercely, "Chirp, chirp, chirp!"
All right, then. I curse the big bad guys to never get to eat anything tasty for the rest of their lives!
Third Cub said, "Chirp, chirp, chirp!"
I curse the big bad guys to go three days without pooping!
Eldest Cub said, "Chirp, chirp, chirp."
I curse them to be a hundred times sadder than Dad.
The people were already gone and couldn't hear the cubs' abuse. The curses had no practical effect, but to Tao Qiu, those words were good medicine for healing the scars on his heart.
His parents had cared about appearances all their lives. When they were young, they had married because others praised them as a well-matched couple;
After they married
and no longer had feelings for each other, they had been afraid of gossip. They would rather torment and cheat on each other than divorce. To play the part of a warm family of three, they had often forced him to take photos with them and post them on Moments, even though their hatred for each other had extended to him.
He had deliberately gone to a university as far from home as he could, but they had forced open his bedroom door and gone through his private belongings without permission. After discovering from his diary that he liked men, they had found an excuse to trick him into coming home.
They had forced him to take it back and say that what he had written in his diary was false. They couldn't accept that their son was gay, because that would expose them to criticism from the people around them.
He had refused to do as they said. He no longer wanted to live with them under a false pretense of happiness.
They had grown angry and accused him together. Later, somehow, they had begun blaming each other, each believing it was because the other had failed as a husband or wife that their son had come to fear heterosexual relationships and like men instead.
The conflict between them had been building for a long time, and now it was ready to erupt at the slightest spark.
The argument had escalated into a physical fight. Seeing that blood was about to be spilled, Tao Qiu ultimately couldn't bear to stand by and stepped forward to stop them.
Amid the pushing and struggling, he didn't know whether it was his father or his mother, or perhaps both of them.
He was shoved violently to the floor, and behind him stood a heavy solid-wood table.
In the last second before Tao Qiu lost consciousness, his parents' hoarse shouting was still in his ears. That meant they hadn't even glanced at him after he fell.
He and his parents had been family by blood, but enemies in reality.
He was pitiable, but also fortunate.
In his previous life, his grandparents had made up for the familial love he lacked. In this life, he had the cubs to love and care for him.
He hadn't lost the ability to love, and through loving others, he had received love himself.
Tao Qiu shed tears again, but this time the corners of his lips were turned up.
Third Cub comforted him in a soft voice. "Chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp."
Dad, don't cry. Yuanyuan will hug you.
With that, Third Cub stretched her wings as wide as she could, trying to wrap them around Tao Qiu's waist, but unfortunately she failed.
Eldest Cub and Second Cub also flew into Tao Qiu's arms and gently nuzzled him, offering comfort through their actions.
They had come from Dad's belly, and when they snuggled close to it, they were also close to Dad's heart.
Tao Qiu wrapped his arms around them, just as he had when they were still eggs, sleeping quietly and obediently in his belly.
"This time, Dad cried because he was touched by you, sweethearts. These are tears of happiness, because Dad felt your love for me. Dad's heart is even sweeter and warmer than when I eat fruit."
"Chirp?" Second Cub looked up at Tao Qiu.
Really?
Tao Qiu smiled. "Of course it's true."
Second Cub smiled too, Tao Qiu's face reflected in her green eyes. "Chirp, chirp, chirp!"
Then from now on, we'll be Dad's fruit!
Tao Qiu said, "All right. From now on, you'll be Dad's fruit, and Dad will be your fruit too."
Third Cub covered her heart and said in delight, "Chirp, chirp, chirp!"
Dad, my heart feels warm now too!
Eldest Cub and Second Cub followed suit, making the same gesture and saying the same thing.
Tao Qiu didn't question whether it was true. He held them happily and said, "Then we'll all be warm and sweet, and we won't be afraid of the cold or bitterness anymore."
"Chirp, chirp."
Not afraid anymore.
The cubs pressed even closer to Tao Qiu, and he didn't put them back on the stone bench. After calming himself, he set the backpack aside for the time being, picked up the cloth bag, and continued sorting through the food inside.
This time, he took out a bag of sugar.
It wasn't candy mixed with all kinds of additives, but rock sugar that looked like irregular transparent pebbles and gave off a simple sweetness.