Itachi Uchiha: I Should Be Under the Car, Not in It

The eerie purple glow reflected in their eyes flickered within the sea of flames, while this group of elite Root ninja stood there as if bewitched, frozen in their poses without moving.

Arrogantly and completely defenselessly, they used their flesh-and-blood bodies to take a B-rank Fire Release: Great Fire Annihilation enhanced by Sage Mode Chakra head-on!

"Seriously, who said Fire Release can't burn people to death?"

Daren Yi made a snide remark as he watched the ninja die instantly in the blazing inferno, without even having time to scream. Even the metal ninja tools they carried melted into molten iron under the searing flames of the Sage Mode Fire Release, and some even vaporized into gas...

In the blink of an eye, after he had already been captured alive and held in someone's hand like a chick,

Shimura Danzō finally realized that he had once again been ambushed by those Uchiha Clan bastards who had no sense of fair play.

Last time, it had been "Shisui Uchiha." This time, it was "Uchiha Yi." Both of them first dropped some earth-shattering revelation on him, then quietly used genjutsu to launch a sneak attack while he was emotionally shattered and out of control...

Damn it, all that "Uchiha glory" and "Uchiha pride" that the Uchiha Clan always talked about—none of you ever mentioned them when you were ambushing someone!

Truly a clan born evil! The depths of your Uchiha evil truly knew no bounds!

At that moment, Danzō, filled with grievance and resentment, had completely forgotten that he had been the one to launch a sneak attack first and gouge out one of Shisui Uchiha's eyes!

"Finally captured you alive! I didn't give you a chance to activate the Reversed Four Symbols Seal and kill yourself first."

Holding Shimura Danzō in one hand, Daren Yi looked as though he had finally relaxed, yet he continued speaking words that cut straight to the heart.

"Although your method of taking everyone down with you couldn't actually hurt anyone, I agonized over it for quite a while to prevent you from successfully killing yourself!

"You know, stepping over an ant without taking its life is a difficult level of strength to control."

After being struck by an excessive, saturated wave of "emo" emotions, Shimura Danzō's mind had become muddled and depressed, and he had completely lost control of his body.

Struggling to preserve the last shred of clarity in his mind, he glared viciously at Daren Yi before falling completely into a vegetative state.

Yet a single muddy tear silently slid down his weathered old face.

Shameless! Two Mangekyo against one severely injured Shimura Danzō, and they still had to ambush me without leaving me even the slightest chance. Now they were even talking trash and showing off...

Behind the shameless pair of "dog man and woman," Little Sasuke stood with his large dark eyes wide open, attentively observing and studying the "combat experience" of his outstanding clan seniors.

He seemed to understand something. So this was what a true ninja was? So this was how the true Uchiha Clan fought?

Suddenly, Sasuke attained enlightenment...

No wonder Father was always dissatisfied with me. My fighting style is too outdated! This is how the Uchiha Clan needs to fight!

Fugaku: ???

Daren Yi turned around and saw the little fellow staring excitedly with wide eyes, seemingly deep in thought. He was quite pleased with Sasuke's comprehension. Bringing him here to observe and learn from his "advanced experience" had not been in vain.

Casually tossing the vegetative Danzō aside, Daren Yi crouched down and reached out to pat Little Sasuke's head. The seven-year-old's black hair was soft and smooth, and felt quite nice to the touch. He continued his earnest instruction.

"To fight, you need to use every possible method. You already understand the principle of taking the initiative and launching a sneak attack, but you must also remember that a ninja's battle is a battle of deception.

"Anyone who honestly shouts out the name of their technique before using ninjutsu is either showing off or an idiot! Either attack directly without saying a word, or prepare to use Fire Release while shouting Water Release in advance.

"If the enemy comes at you for close combat, find an opening and throw shuriken or kunai.

"Don't rush to show off before a fight, and definitely don't introduce all your abilities. Wait until the enemy has completely lost the ability to resist, then step on their corpse and take your time showing off.

"If the enemy stays calm, provoke their emotions. For example, with a girl like Sakura, call her flat-chested. If they're an orphan, laugh at them for not having a mother. If it's an older female ninja, mock her for being unable to get married.

"For an old man like Danzō, laugh at him for being old and ugly, and for never becoming Hokage even until his death. For little old men who have already become Kage, laugh at them for having no successor and being unable to retire even until they die.

"If you run into someone who likes rapping, mock them for not enunciating clearly and for singing songs nobody listens to. If you meet someone who likes playing with explosions, laugh at them because explosions aren't art at all—dogs wouldn't even play with them..."

Although Little Sasuke still could not understand some of it and felt that some of Daren Yi's examples sounded rather strange,

he still obediently nodded, firmly committing every lesson his brother-in-law taught him to memory.

Excellent! So obedient and well-behaved!

Daren Yi was even more pleased with Little Sasuke. He was obedient, affectionate, especially adorable, and not mischievous in the slightest. Who wouldn't like a child like that?

Izumi Uchiha stood to one side, covering her mouth as she giggled. Watching the "heartwarming" interaction between the older and younger pair, they looked so wonderful together, like a family.

At that moment, another person finally could not bear it any longer. He stepped out from the depths of the forest where he had been hiding and could not help clearing his throat as he tried to explain, "Ahem, Sasuke, the Uchiha Clan isn't like this!"

"Itachi Uchiha, you followed us for half the day and watched until now. You finally decided to come out?"

Daren Yi rose with a smile. One hand still stroked Sasuke's smooth black hair, while the other held Sasuke's little hand.

Without any surprise, he asked the newcomer a question that struck straight at the heart. "Did you come to see Sasuke?"

Caught red-handed in front of the brother!

Pfft!

Seeing the scene before him, Itachi Uchiha felt as though a kunai had pierced straight through his heart.

The pain nearly made him put on a mask of agony, and even his usually calm, rational eyes showed a brief moment of confusion!

It hurt. It hurt so much!

It hurt far too much!

I'm clearly Sasuke's real older brother! Sasuke used to call me "Oniisan" all day long and ask to be held.

Why was he leaning so affectionately and obediently against someone else now? Why had he even stretched out his free hand to hug this stranger's leg?

My little brother Sasuke has been defiled!

The bone-deep despair, pain, and hatred flooded Sasuke's small heart once again with the appearance of the man before him, surging out through his eyes.

It was so overwhelming that the seven-year-old child needed something to rely on in order to find the courage and reason to keep living.

Luckily, luckily... luckily, he still had Brother Shisui. Luckily, he still had Sister Izumi and Brother-in-law Daren Yi... Luckily, he still had family. Luckily, he could once again feel the love of family.

Luckily, he no longer had to live in this world alone and lost, like a wandering ghost!

Veins bulged on the back of his hand. Little Sasuke, only seven years old this year, tightly gripped Daren Yi's hand and held onto his leg.

Only then did his body, shaking from pain, manage to steady itself instead of collapsing to the ground.

Sasuke Uchiha almost forced out the name that, together with his despair, hurt him down to his very bones through clenched teeth. "Itachi Uchiha!"