Original God, But It's a Chat Group

Original God, But It's a Chat Group

Author: Foster Father

Synopsis:

Li Yue had drifted through half his life, regretting only that he had never met a wise master. If Lord Aizen would not reject him, Yue was willing to acknowledge him as his foster father!

Aizen: 6!

Though you lost the Monarch, you still have me! I can completely become your new ruler!

Zhongli: 6!

Raiden Shogun, do me a favor and end the Vision Hunt Decree!

Raiden Ei: 6!

When did you develop the illusion that I wasn't using the authority of dreams?!

Scaramouche: 6!

Li Yue, an amusement-seeker from the twenty-first century, had transmigrated into Original God. But it wasn't just Original God—there was also a very interesting Chat Group! Li Yue declared that it was time to have some fun!

Volume One

The Vago Monarch Didn't Understand People's Hearts

At Tian Tiezhui's storyteller's stall in Liyue Harbor, a strangely dressed young man had taken Tian Tiezhui's usual spot and was telling a story about the Vago Monarch.

"Before the Vago Monarch led the Adepti out to battle, the Dust Archon Guizhong came to see him off."

"Facing the taciturn Vago Monarch, the Dust Archon Guizhong smiled as she always did while bidding him farewell. In her eyes, the Monarch would be just as he had been on every previous campaign: swiftly drive away the invading Demon Gods, then return at the head of his army. But unlike before, she said one extra thing as she saw him off."

"Morax, when you return, I have a gift for you."

"The Vago Monarch did not think much of his friend's intention to give him a gift. He merely smiled and nodded, for he too believed he would return quickly, just as he always had."

"Yet not long after the Monarch departed with the Adepti, the Dust Archon Guizhong was attacked by other Demon Gods. The Dust Archon, who was not skilled in battle, fought desperately to protect her people. Upon receiving the news at the front lines, the Monarch immediately rushed back at full speed. Unfortunately, by the time he arrived at Guoli Plains, the Dust Archon Guizhong had already fallen, turning into a cloud of dust and leaving only a strange lock at her side."

"To prevent the lingering power of a fallen Demon God from causing devastation, the Adepti could only seal away the Dust Archon Guizhong's remains. As for the Monarch, he picked up that strange lock."

"Morax, I sealed all the secrets in my heart inside this lock. As long as you open it, you'll be able to see all my secrets!"

"The Dust Archon Guizhong had sealed everything within that strange lock, intending to give it to the Monarch upon his return. Yet everything came too late. The Dust Archon Guizhong did not see the Monarch one last time, nor could she personally tell him the words she had prepared. She left behind only that strange lock."

"That was the origin of The Vortex Vanquisher."

After finishing, the young man stepped down from the platform and sat at a nearby table. He picked up his teacup and drained the remaining tea in one gulp, while the surrounding audience wore enlightened expressions, still immersed in the story.

"So The Vortex Vanquisher had such an origin. I truly didn't expect that."

At the tea table, a girl in a purple dress with long hair tied into two cat-ear-like points could not help sighing. Afterward, she looked toward the dignified young man seated beside her.

"Mr. Zhongli, you're so knowledgeable. Do you know anything about The Vortex Vanquisher?"

The young man pondered briefly before answering.

"As far as I know, The Vortex Vanquisher was indeed created by the Dust Archon Guizhong. However, I do not know whether it truly sealed any secrets within."

"But according to common sense, as a Demon God, she should not have sealed away any secrets, much less spoken such words."

"Zhongli, that's where you're wrong."

The young storyteller set down his teacup and refuted the young man's words.

"Oh? Why do you say that?"

"Because no one understands the Dust Archon Guizhong better than I do!"

The young man spread his hands, forming an OK sign with one while pointing upward with the other index finger.

"Everything you know, Zhongli, comes from orthodox historical records. And those records were mostly written down by the Vago Monarch, the God of History. But what does the Vago Monarch understand? Even if he were standing right here, he wouldn't understand the Dust Archon Guizhong as well as I do. He's just a rock who only knows how to fight. He doesn't understand a girl's feelings at all. Even the emotions a girl wants to convey, he merely takes as friendly interactions between friends!"

The young man could only let the corner of his mouth twitch before helplessly choosing to remain silent. The purple-haired girl, meanwhile, could not help commenting.

"People say I disrespect the Monarch, but I think you're the one who disrespects him most, Li Yue. You actually dared call the Monarch a rock. If anyone else in Liyue Harbor heard that, they might drag you straight to the Millelith on the spot."

"If I said it before anyone else, what you described might really happen, Keqing. But in front of you and Zhongli, there's no need to worry."

The young man casually spread his hands, pointing at the purple-haired girl with one.

"Keqing, the Yuheng Star of Liyue, publicly questioned the Monarch at last year's Rite of Descension. The people of Liyue secretly call her a Monarch hater."

Then he pointed at the young man with the other.

"Zhongli, consultant of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, is exceptionally learned, yet he loves refuting every account of the Vago Monarch whenever it concerns the Monarch himself. He is the ringleader of Liyue's Monarch haters."

"You two are Liyue's Sleeping Dragon and Phoenix!"

Just as the young man had said, the three people present included Keqing, the Yuheng Star, known as the Qixing member least respectful toward the gods. She firmly believed that Liyue should be governed by humans, and that even the Vago Monarch had matters he could not account for. Thus, she was called a Monarch hater. The dignified young man was Zhongli, a consultant of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. Because he frequently refuted stories concerning the Monarch in all sorts of settings, even more excessively than Keqing, he was called the ringleader of Monarch haters. As for the final young man, he was merely Li Yue, an ordinary transmigrator from the twenty-first century—Yue as in joy!

Having transmigrated to Teyvat, Li Yue naturally knew Liyue's true circumstances. Of the two Monarch haters before him, one was a warped Monarch fanatic, while the other was the Monarch himself living under an assumed name. As for Li Yue, he was merely an amusement-seeker who knew perfectly well that Zhongli was the Monarch, yet deliberately made up stories about him right in front of him!

Keqing and Zhongli both could not help letting their eyes twitch when they heard Li Yue say this.

The other audience members around them had now recovered from the story of The Vortex Vanquisher and could not help asking Li Yue.

"Mr. Li Yue, since you said the Dust Archon's secrets were sealed inside The Vortex Vanquisher, did the Monarch ever open it?"

"No!"

Li Yue answered decisively.

"With the Monarch's abilities, he could have easily opened The Vortex Vanquisher. Yet after obtaining it, he did not open it. Instead, he preserved it as a relic of the Dust Archon Guizhong, as a memento of an old friend. To him, that was a form of erosion."

"So he never opened it..."

Keqing felt somewhat regretful. She had wanted to know the Dust Archon Guizhong's secrets.

Zhongli, seated beside her, nodded in agreement.

"To the Vago Monarch, the departure of an old friend indeed counted as severe erosion."

"I knew you'd say that, Zhongli."

Li Yue shook his head with a disappointed expression.

"Oh?"

Zhongli looked at Li Yue curiously.

"Because your personality is made of stone too."

Zhongli was speechless. Could they stop talking about rocks?

"Not only that, the Monarch kept The Vortex Vanquisher without opening it, so he never learned the Dust Archon Guizhong's secrets. Naturally, he never understood her feelings either. This greatly disappointed Great Demon of Dust and Waves, the Dust Archon Guizhong's friend, so she chose to leave and live alone."

"Great Demon of Dust and Waves?"

Keqing was greatly surprised. She had heard the title before, but the figure was not active in Liyue's legends.

"That's right. Great Demon of Dust and Waves was also one of Liyue's ancient Adepti. Unlike the other Three-Eyed Five Manifestations Adepti, she was deeply disappointed in the Monarch because of the Dust Archon Guizhong's death. So she left him and began living in seclusion. Before leaving, she said one thing."

"What did she say?"

Everyone grew curious, including Zhongli.

"The Monarch... doesn't understand people's hearts!"

No One Understood the Vago Monarch Better Than I Did

Inside the Jade Chamber, suspended high above the clouds over Liyue Harbor, the Tianquan Star Ningguang looked at the intelligence report that had just been delivered and could not help laughing.

"The Monarch doesn't understand people's hearts? That's quite an interesting evaluation."

In less than an hour, the phrase "the Vago Monarch doesn't understand people's hearts" had spread throughout Liyue Harbor alongside the story of The Vortex Vanquisher. Even Ningguang, high atop the Jade Chamber, had heard the tale.

"Lady Ningguang, should we have the Millelith arrest this Li Yue?"

Bai Wen asked from the side. Ningguang merely waved her hand lightly.

"No need. He's only an ordinary person with some personal opinions about the Monarch. There is no need to arrest him. If we arrested people over that, then Keqing and Zhongli, who sat with him, would also have to be arrested."

As the Tianquan Star, Ningguang held everything in Liyue Harbor in her grasp, aside from the Adepti and the Monarch.

A month ago, a strangely dressed young man named Li Yue had arrived in Liyue Harbor. That itself was nothing unusual. As a famous commercial port on the Teyvat continent, Liyue Harbor naturally received outsiders all the time. Yet only days later, this young man began making a name for himself in Liyue.

He first went to Wanmin Restaurant and became friends with the young chef Xiangling. Then, together with Xiangling, he introduced novel dishes such as spicy lizard, charcoal grilled frog, and Deep-fried Spider Skewers, becoming a newly famous expert in unconventional cuisine.

Next, he went to Wangsheng Funeral Parlor and, together with its director Hu Tao, introduced an aristocratic sales model specifically aimed at selling burial plots to wealthy people. Unlike Hu Tao's usual second tombstone half-price deal, this time they sold expensive and scarce plots, which nonetheless sold exceptionally well. The limited slots were quickly sold out, and Liyue's wealthy were still waiting for Wangsheng Funeral Parlor to launch a second round.

Afterward, he went to the Feiyun Commerce Guild and partnered with its second young master, Xingqiu, to release a wuxia novel titled The Smiling, Proud Wanderer. The moment it was released, it immediately became a popular book in Liyue and the favorite tale of Liyue's storytellers.

After that, seeing how lively the storytellers' area was, he went there himself to act as a temporary storyteller. He started a program called Past of Teyvat, dedicated to telling tales from Teyvat's past. Because the details in his stories differed from many historical records, were even more exciting, and often involved the Seven Archons and the Adepti, he quickly became another hot topic in Liyue. Keqing, the Yuheng Star, and Zhongli, consultant of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, had even become loyal listeners, sitting at the front VIP table every time.

With an outsider causing such a stir, Ningguang naturally had to pay attention.

As for Li Yue's claim that Great Demon of Dust and Waves had said the Vago Monarch did not understand people's hearts, Ningguang believed Li Yue had added that line himself. In essence, Li Yue himself was saying that the Monarch did not understand people's hearts.

But as Ningguang had said, if someone had to be arrested merely for making up stories about the Monarch, then Keqing and Zhongli, seated at the VIP table, would both have to be arrested as well.

"All right, Bai Wen. You may leave. As for Li Yue, simply have someone continue watching him."

"Yes."

Bai Wen withdrew, leaving Ningguang alone to look over the complete version of the story that had been sent up.

"Though it sounds somewhat absurd, what he said isn't entirely without reason."

"Li Yue is right. The Monarch may not understand people's hearts!"

At the tea stall in Chihu Rock, the listeners had already dispersed, but the three people at the VIP tea table remained.

Keqing had spent this time thinking about the final line in Li Yue's story. In the end, she reached the conclusion that it made a great deal of sense!

"Mr. Zhongli, what do you think?"

"According to common sense, even though the Vago Monarch was a god, it would be impossible for him to account for everything. As a god, he could not know what everyone was thinking in their hearts. Therefore, in a certain sense, the Monarch indeed did not understand people's hearts."

"Oh, Zhongli, you do see that point quite clearly."

Li Yue grinned at Zhongli. The gag he had copied from the Type-Moon side had actually received the Vago Monarch's personal approval. That was truly interesting.

"The Monarch was a god. When he considered matters, he mostly did so from a god's perspective. That was entirely different from us ordinary people, who considered matters from a human perspective. So Great Demon of Dust and Waves was not wrong to say that the Monarch did not understand people's hearts—especially that he did not understand a maiden's heart!"

"A maiden's heart... Indeed, even after all these years since the Dust Archon Guizhong's passing, the Monarch still failed to understand her feelings. What a pity."

Keqing sighed. Though she was a workaholic, she was also a young woman, so she felt quite a bit of resonance with such matters of a maiden's feelings.

I do not believe the Dust Archon Guizhong thought that way.

Though he answered so in his heart, Zhongli did not say it aloud. He merely sighed helplessly, because if he dared say it, this young man named Li Yue would fiercely refute him.

Who understands this? As the Vago Monarch, I can't even decide my own feelings!

"Although the Monarch didn't understand a maiden's heart, he was quite good in other respects."

Seeing Zhongli's helpless expression, Li Yue chose to raise another topic.

"Oh?"

Zhongli became interested. He had listened to Li Yue's stories here for many days, yet the immortals and gods in those stories had rarely received much praise. For example, Li Yue had called Mondstadt's Anemo Archon Barbatos a slacker, described Inazuma's Raiden Shogun as a shut-in girl, and today the Vago Monarch had earned the title of someone who did not understand people's hearts.

Now Li Yue was actually going to say something good about the Vago Monarch?

"That's right. Take Keqing, for instance."

"Me?"

Keqing pointed at herself curiously. What did this have to do with her?

"That's right. Last year, Keqing, you publicly questioned the Monarch during the Rite of Descension and said Liyue should be governed by humans. Yet the Monarch did not blame you. That proves one thing!"

"What thing?"

"It proves that the Monarch thinks very highly of you!"

Li Yue tapped the table, narrowing his eyes.

"But the Monarch did not approve of what I said at the time."

Keqing was confused.

"That was because the Monarch had already made plans for that year and could not change them because of your momentary statement. Therefore, the request you made then naturally would not be granted. But this year will be different!"

"This year? But this year's Rite of Descension is being presided over by the Tianquan Star Ningguang."