As a Ninja, All I Want Is to Live Off Women in the Nasuverse

"My brother's family is named Kurogiri. His son is Kirito Kurogiri, a few years older than you, while his daughter, Kirie Kurogiri, is about your age..."

Akimichi Daisuke began describing just how wonderful the Kurogiri Family was, saying that Higashino Kanade would surely be happy if he became their adopted son.

On the surface, Higashino Kanade listened patiently, occasionally showing a look of longing. Inside, however, it felt as though an earthquake had struck, and he had no idea where to even begin complaining.

Kirito Kurogiri... Kirito Kurogiri...

He remembered now. He was the male protagonist of Kara no Kyoukai, Ryougi Shiki's future husband, the man who had successfully entered and left the Root.

Kirito Kurogiri and Higashino Kanade were undoubtedly romantic rivals, because Ryougi Shiki was also within Higashino Kanade's target range.

Higashino Kanade also recalled the identity of the man before him. Akimichi Daisuke seemed to be Kirito Kurogiri's uncle. He worked at the police station and had a thing for Aozaki Touko.

He had actually been invited to join his rival's family. What a wonderful misunderstanding!

What a coincidence. No, no, I absolutely can't join the Kurogiri Family. Higashino Kanade made up his mind.

As for why Higashino Kanade wanted to pursue Ryougi Shiki, it was a decision he had made after careful consideration.

Higashino Kanade had lived only twenty years from birth to death in the Naruto world. During that brief lifetime, he had come to understand one truth—there were limits to a person's abilities!

No matter how hard an ordinary person worked, there would always be a genius who could achieve in a short time what took you ages to accomplish, then effortlessly surpass it.

It felt like all your hard work was being pinned to the ground and rubbed raw over and over by a bunch of burly men.

Take learning the Rasengan, for example. Naruto had needed less than a month, while Higashino Kanade had spent an entire year!

Naruto and Sasuke had gained the power of the Sage of Six Paths before they were even twenty, while Higashino Kanade was still an ordinary Jonin at twenty.

At the moment Uchiha Madara crushed him to death, Higashino Kanade understood—hard work couldn't beat those born with powerful fathers, and those born with powerful fathers couldn't beat cheaters.

As an ordinary man, what right did he have to participate in the Otsutsuki Clan's civil war? Ordinary people should just accept being background characters and stop dreaming!

After reincarnating, Higashino Kanade had come to terms with it. He had let it go.

He didn't want to live so exhaustingly anymore. He didn't want to become scenery meant to prove a genius's greatness. Someone else could be the protagonist. He only wanted to cling to a rich, beautiful woman and live out his life safely and steadily.

Simply put, Higashino Kanade no longer wanted to work hard.

Right now, all he wanted was to find a rich, beautiful woman and become her live-in son-in-law.

Of course, in the perilous Nasuverse, an ordinary rich, beautiful woman clearly could not satisfy Higashino Kanade's desire to live peacefully. Only super-rich beauties like Ryougi Shiki, Arcueid, and Illya could do that.

Take Ryougi Shiki, for instance. Once he became the Ryougi Family's live-in son-in-law, he would definitely enjoy a life of luxury. His wife would be beautiful and capable, and if some blind Dead Apostle, Magus, Heroic Spirit, Goetia, or whoever came knocking, he could just throw Ryougi Shiki at them while cheering "666" from behind her.

For the sake of his wonderful future life, sorry, Kirito Kurogiri. I'm definitely living off Ryougi Shiki!

As for a man's dignity, pride, and the like, Higashino Kanade only wanted to say sorry. The doctor said his stomach was weak, so he could only live off women for the rest of his life. Pride couldn't fill his belly. There was nothing shameful about a man living off a woman!

"...So? What's your decision?"

After saying all that, Akimichi Daisuke looked at Higashino Kanade with great anticipation.

"Officer, your proposal is truly wonderful. I'm sure the Kurogiri Family is every bit as good as you say."

Higashino Kanade first gratefully affirmed Akimichi Daisuke's offer. Then he took a deep breath and said with a firm expression, "But I refuse!"

"???"

Akimichi Daisuke froze. He had never expected Higashino Kanade to answer like that. The rejection was far too decisive.

Higashino Kanade squeezed out a few tears. His still-childish yet handsome face, coupled with his sorrowful expression, was deeply moving. Looking at the pitifully charming young boy before him, Akimichi Daisuke was stunned for a moment, unable to summon even the slightest thought of blaming him.

"My parents only passed away a few days ago. Before I've even properly paid my respects to them, I'm already looking for a new family. That would be too ungrateful for everything they did to raise me."

"I know you mean well, Officer, but I truly don't have the heart to adapt to a new family right now. I want to live alone for a while and properly honor my parents before making plans for the future. Please understand."

Higashino Kanade's acting was excellent, and his voice was moving. Akimichi Daisuke did not doubt the boy before him in the slightest. Instead, he sighed inwardly. What a good child!

Seeing Higashino Kanade's resolute attitude and his flawless reasoning, Akimichi Daisuke did not try to force him. He merely patted his shoulder.

"I understand. I was too hasty. Here is my business card. If you run into any trouble, you can come to me at any time. The offer to join that family will remain open as well. Get some rest."

After saying that, Akimichi Daisuke got up to leave. He did not want to waste any more time trying to persuade him. Police officers were busy too.

"Wait!"

Higashino Kanade reached out with his pale little hand and grabbed a corner of his clothes. With a pleading expression, he asked, "Can you tell me about the criminal who killed my parents? Please!"

Akimichi Daisuke was quite surprised to hear such words from a twelve-year-old. As a victim, the boy had not been scared witless by the terrifying Murderer. Instead, he wanted information about the culprit.

Did this child want to avenge his parents? Or was he simply curious?

No matter which possibility it was, Akimichi Daisuke did not want to give Higashino Kanade an answer. He did not want a child to live under the shadow of revenge for the rest of his life.

"Well... I can't disclose that. Just rest well. As for the criminal, we police officers will catch him for you."

Akimichi Daisuke rubbed Higashino Kanade's soft hair and promised with a smile.

A head pat? Pat your sister!

Having his head touched by a burly man made Higashino Kanade deeply uncomfortable. His two lives combined added up to nearly fifty years. He was no child.

Since you won't tell me, I'll use a ninja's methods to get the answer I want.

While Akimichi Daisuke was immersed in the pleasure of the head pat, Higashino Kanade quickly formed several hand seals.

Nirvana's Nest Illusion Technique!

An inconspicuous feather landed on Akimichi Daisuke. He felt an unprecedented drowsiness rise within him and, unable to control himself, sat down on a chair and entered a half-awake, half-asleep state.

PS: The review process wasted some time yesterday. Starting tomorrow, chapters will update at 8 AM every day—three chapters a day, over 2,000 words each time. Seeing how hard this newbie is working, asking for some votes isn't too much, right?

The Cheat That Arrived Twenty Years Late

Nirvana's Nest Illusion Technique was a Genjutsu that could put its target to sleep. This technique had appeared when Orochimaru invaded Konoha.

However, putting someone to sleep was merely the most basic use of this technique. Konoha ANBU frequently used it during interrogations, because when people were asleep, their consciousness was at its weakest and they were at their most defenseless.

Higashino Kanade had little talent for Genjutsu. What he excelled at most was Fire Release Ninjutsu, but as long as he put in the effort, he could still learn this most basic Genjutsu.

"Phew... There goes the Chakra I worked so hard to extract. I hope you can give me some valuable information."

Higashino Kanade wiped the sweat from his forehead and began extracting information from Akimichi Daisuke.

It had been less than ten hours since Higashino Kanade woke up. Ordinarily, the amount of Chakra he had extracted should not have supported a Genjutsu for long.

Yet to Higashino Kanade's pleasant surprise, this new body had far better aptitude than his original one. Back when he was studying at the ninja academy, it had taken him half a year to extract Chakra for the first time, and the amount had been pitifully small. As a result, he had to carefully calculate every bit of Chakra during combat. If he could deal with an enemy using taijutsu, he would never use ninjutsu.

Yet this new body had extracted Chakra almost immediately. The amount he had extracted in just a few hours even exceeded what the old Higashino Kanade could extract in a full day of focused effort. A large part of that was because Higashino Kanade had originally been a Jonin, and extracting Chakra was as familiar to him as eating and drinking. Still, there was no denying that this body's aptitude was vastly superior to his old one.

Higashino Kanade did not know whether his current aptitude could compare to Naruto's or Sasuke's, but it should be somewhat stronger than that of an ordinary ninja. To put it simply, if the old Higashino Kanade had been traveling on foot, then the current one had gotten himself a bicycle.

Ten minutes later, Higashino Kanade had obtained all the information Akimichi Daisuke knew. After also having Akimichi Daisuke leave behind the Kurogiri Family's contact information, Higashino Kanade snapped his fingers, and Akimichi Daisuke woke up.

"Huh? What happened? I think I fell asleep."

Akimichi Daisuke rubbed his sleepy eyes, looking somewhat bewildered.

"Officer, you nodded off just now. You looked like you were sleeping so soundly that I didn't wake you. You must have been exhausted from work lately, right?" Higashino Kanade put on an innocent child's expression and asked with concern.

"Oh, right. I was indeed a little sleepy just now. Looks like I've been too busy staying up late and working overtime recently. It's all because of that Murderer."

Akimichi Daisuke complained once, instinctively accepting that he had fallen asleep due to overwork. After all, he was only an ordinary person, and that was the explanation he found easiest to believe.

After reminding Higashino Kanade to rest well, Akimichi Daisuke hurriedly left. The enormous private hospital room was left with only Higashino Kanade inside.

Higashino Kanade recalled the information Akimichi Daisuke had provided about the Murderer, searching his memories for anyone related to it. But after thinking for a long time, he still could not remember who the Murderer was.

"Sigh, I've forgotten nearly all the plot. The culprit must be some insignificant background character."

Higashino Kanade sighed, but his habits as a ninja did not allow him to lower his guard against a "background character" he could not remember.

This was not a world for ordinary people. Magi, Dead Apostles, Heroic Spirits—none of them were opponents the current Higashino Kanade could afford to provoke. The Murderer emerging in Kan'mu City might have been a background character in the anime's plot, but in the real world, he definitely would not be an ordinary person.

In other words, the current Higashino Kanade was very likely no match for the Murderer.

Repaying kindness was one of Higashino Kanade's principles, but compared with revenge, he feared death far more. He had no desire to experience the pain and despair of being crushed to death by Madara-sama a second time.

"I'll investigate the Murderer's identity first. If he's just an ordinary person, I'll kill him directly and take revenge. If he's some powerful opponent I can't beat, then I'll wait until I'm living off Sister Shiki or have trained back to Jonin level before getting revenge."

Ding—Loading complete. Strongest Hokage Cultivation System activated!

Who? Who said that?

The sudden voice gave Higashino Kanade a fright. With a swift kip-up, he sprang from the hospital bed, his hand instinctively reaching behind him to pull out a Kunai.

As a Jonin who had carried out hundreds of dangerous missions, reacting at the slightest sign of trouble had become a habit. Without such sharp reflexes, Higashino Kanade had no idea how many times he would have died already.

Host, please remain calm. I am a system bound to your soul. According to the terminology in your memories, you may call me a Golden Finger. Everything I say is transmitted directly into your consciousness.

This time, Higashino Kanade heard it clearly. The instincts brought by his life as a ninja allowed him to calm down quickly and begin analyzing the situation.

After remaining silent for a long while, Higashino Kanade cautiously muttered in his mind, System?

I am here.

The emotionless mechanical female voice appeared in his mind again. This time, Higashino Kanade completely believed that something incredible existed within him.

Higashino Kanade took a deep breath. In an instant, shock, joy, doubt, excitement, and countless other emotions flooded his heart. His mind was a complete mess.

...What system did you say you were again?

My name is the Strongest Hokage Cultivation System. My purpose is to train the host into the strongest Hokage.

Hokage... Heh, Hokage my ass! Your daddy is already dead, and this is the Nasuverse!

An unprecedented sense of grievance and pain surged into his heart. At that moment, Higashino Kanade wanted to curse the system's entire family tree and transform into a legendary trash-talking hunter!

...After scanning, I have concluded that this is indeed not the Naruto world. It bears a 98.8% similarity to the Nasuverse in the database.

Host, what happened during the twenty years that this system was loading?

Twenty years. I endured for a full twenty years. Do you know how I spent those twenty years?!

Tears burst from his eyes. Memories of the past flooded his mind, and Higashino Kanade, who had suppressed himself for twenty years, finally erupted!

Can you understand what it feels like when no matter how hard you work, your achievements don't even amount to one-tenth of someone else's?

Can you understand what it feels like in a world where bloodline limits are everywhere, while all I had was a Fire Release technique that couldn't even kill anyone?

Can you understand what it feels like when some people become Hokage at twenty, while I, someone from the same generation, was only a Jonin?

Can you understand what it feels like when all those beautiful female protagonists either die tragically or get married, while I'm not even qualified to approach them?

I...

No! You don't understand!

Konan, I still couldn't save you in the end. Mei Terumi, I still never got to marry you.

Higashino Kanade threw himself onto the bed and cried his heart out. It was fortunate the nurses had not seen this scene, or he would have received a comforting lap pillow and some motherly affection.

MMP! The only thing you actually cared about was that last line, wasn't it?!

If the system had a snark module, it would definitely have wanted to curse Higashino Kanade for being shameless.

PS: Three updates today, please vote!

Struck Hard by the System

Host, please do not be overly saddened. Although you are no longer in the Naruto world, this system is still capable of training you into the strongest Hokage. You merely need to work hard and complete the tasks issued by the system.

You mean that as long as I complete tasks, I can become stronger? Higashino Kanade wiped away his tears.

Yes.

Stronger than even the Sage of Six Paths?

Theoretically, as long as the host works hard, even Kaguya Otsutsuki will be nothing more than a stepping stone beneath your feet.

The terms sound pretty generous, but I refuse!

...

The system suddenly fell silent, seemingly unable to understand why Higashino Kanade had said that.

Reason?

The reason is simple. I don't want to work hard anymore.