Honkai: The Herrscher is a Bit Too Lazy
Chapter 3

Defective Herrscher and Pseudo-Herrscher

1,827 words•6 min read•16 views
1mo ago•

"Right this way, ladies!"

At the entrance to the hotel restaurant, two attendants in red cheongsams warmly greeted the two guests.

Both girls entering wore fitted cheongsams. The white-haired girl on the left had her gorgeous hair braided into two lovely plaits. She playfully curled her lips as she looked at the dazzling spread of food, breaking into a radiant smile.

As for the girl in the blue cheongsam on the right... well, her muscle definition was extremely obvious. One look was enough to tell she had the makings of a martial artist.

Of course, if she were not dressed as a woman, calling her a young hero would not have been inappropriate either...

The moment she reached the table, the white-haired girl threw her mission to the back of her mind. She sampled a little of this and a little of that until her mouth was stuffed full. "This is good, and this is good too! I never thought I'd get to eat such delicious food during a mission!"

"Sigh..." The blue-clad young hero—no, Fu Hua—sighed. She picked up a wineglass beside her and poured herself a glass of grape juice.

"Huh?" Kiana turned her head to look at her gloomy companion, took a bite from the chicken drumstick in her hand, and mumbled, "Class Monitor, aren't you eating?"

"I..." Fu Hua had barely opened her mouth when Kiana began rattling off question after question. "Come to think of it, I still don't know what our mission target is this time!"

"And... why did you choose me as your partner, Class Monitor?"

"Before, you said we had to check into this hotel first. So we got a room."

"Could it be... you actually wanted to lure me in with food, then take advantage of my body!"

"No! My body and heart belong to Mei!"

Fu Hua: "..."

Looking at Kiana, who had gone off on a wild tangent all by herself, Fu Hua was momentarily speechless. She had not expected the girl's imagination to be so vivid. If she put even half that effort into her studies, she would not have failed her classes...

"Kiana, you are overthinking it. This mission is simply to gather intelligence. I could complete it on my own." Fu Hua adjusted her glasses and picked up a piece of cake as she awkwardly explained.

"The reason I asked you to partner with me was because this mission gave us a chance to visit Singapore. Besides, I wanted to repay you, Kiana. During Anti-Entropy's previous invasion of the academy, if you had not stepped forward, my life might have been in danger."

"Huh? Really? I never knew you were such a nice person, Class Monitor~ Then I won't hold back~" Kiana scratched her chin shyly, took the cake from Fu Hua's hand, then tossed it into the air and swallowed it in one bite as if she were eating popcorn.

In an ignored corner, a security guard in a suit stared in astonishment at Kiana, who was devouring food in the restaurant.

Honestly, in all his life, this was the first time he had seen a girl finish an entire roast suckling pig in three bites. Xina even walked past him from behind carrying a tray, yet he failed to notice her...

"Scheduled check-in. A12, report the situation in the restaurant. Have any suspected Valkyries entered?"

A call from an Anti-Entropy operative came through the guard's earpiece.

"Yeah, two girls just came in, but there's no need to worry. They're just ordinary girls. Nothing unusual." The suited guard reported while watching Kiana eat.

To be fair, watching that girl eat really did make one hungry.

"Don't let your guard down. Continue monitoring them," the person on the other end of the earpiece kindly reminded him.

Fu Hua had watched the entire exchange through the corner of her eye. Only after the suited guard withdrew his head did she turn and walk toward the corner.

There's only one elevator leading to the VIP Room where Dr. Magi is... Mm, just as expected, it's guarded.

Fu Hua pondered for a moment. Just as she came up with a less-than-ideal plan, she saw a young attendant in red pushing a food cart out of the kitchen toward her.

"Ah! I've got it!" Fu Hua's lips curled slightly. She quietly moved behind the red-clad attendant, and when they passed an empty corner, she knocked the attendant out with a chop to the neck. Then she changed into the attendant's red cheongsam in the storage room. "I'll blend in like this!"

Fu Hua straightened her clothes. The very next second after she pushed the food cart past the nearby corner outside the storage room, the storage room door opened from within.

Xina rubbed her aching neck as she watched Fu Hua's retreating figure, unable to stop herself from muttering, "You could've just told me you wanted to change clothes! Why did you have to hit me... Now I have to figure out another way to sneak upstairs."

After taking that chop to the neck, Xina finally had a clear grasp of the situation.

The suited guard squatting in the restaurant corner and contacting people from time to time was with the unlucky guy she had turned into an ice sculpture. They were most likely the side currently holding the gem.

Though she did not know who Fu Hua worked for, her objective was probably the same as Xina's: obtaining the Serenity Gem that God had mentioned.

And Xina needed to snatch the gem from both groups. It had to be said, this mission was a little too difficult for someone like her, who had only just started out.

Seriously, shouldn't a beginner's first mission be easier...

Could it be that she truly was worthy of being a future Apostle of God? Even the difficulty of her internship mission was terrifying...

Forget it. No point thinking about it. She should go find another set of staff clothes to wear...

Meanwhile, with Xina's complete outfit, Fu Hua passed the elevator and inspection without incident. She arrived outside the VIP Room, stepped forward, and knocked on the door. "Hello, room service."

"Got it. Come in!"

The moment the words fell, the VIP Room's door let out a series of faint clicking sounds.

Pushing open the door and stepping into the pitch-black room, Fu Hua saw a thin figure slowly emerge from the shadows behind her. "I didn't order room service, little bug. Welcome to my cage."

"Not good!" Fu Hua's expression changed, and she quickly pulled away from the person behind her...

In the restaurant, Kiana, still feasting heartily, had not noticed the white-haired old man who had approached behind her after Fu Hua left.

"Miss... could you help this old man with something?" The old man greeted Kiana with a smile, holding a bottle of red wine with a cork that had snapped in half.

Inside the VIP Room...

Fu Hua deliberately held back and pretended to be no match for a certain Defective Herrscher, allowing herself to be suspended in midair by him.

"So it was a trap. Damn it..." Fu Hua, an award-winning actress, gritted her teeth as she glared at Welt before her, wishing she could bite this tasteless, vulgar, and downright hentai bastard to death.

Watching Fu Hua struggle painfully in midair, Welt felt that he had complete control of the situation and decided to pop the champagne at halftime.

He frivolously grabbed Fu Hua's fair, oval face and kneaded it hard. "Hmph. Under Cocolia's orders, I have to stay in this city for a while. It's so boring here, so I have to find myself some entertainment!"

"Don't worry. Before I leave this city... I won't kill you. Just remember to keep me entertained."

"The 'gem' is still... in this city?" Fu Hua suddenly asked, questioning him repeatedly like some stubborn Valkyrie.

"Tch, what a stubborn Valkyrie. You're still thinking about the mission at a time like this? Don't worry, that thing is still in this city." Welt released her hand and carelessly revealed the most important information.

"But it isn't here. We put it in the Underground Safe long ago."

"The Underground Safe?"

Having gotten the answer she needed, Fu Hua frowned and prepared to break free and retrieve the gem.

Indeed, Fu Hua broke free of Welt's restraints as easily as snapping two strands of hair, then cut off Welt's tongue the instant she landed.

Welt: "How is that possible?"

With a tiny burst of force, she sent the stunned Welt flying. Fu Hua picked up the glasses that had fallen to the floor earlier, smiled faintly at Welt, who was questioning his entire life, and said, "It seems you have a lot of questions."

Welt: "@*%*&%$#@$%%" (Even an A-rank Valkyrie shouldn't be able to recover from a million volts that quickly.)

"Mm, out of politeness, I would have liked to answer your questions, but unfortunately, I can't understand what you're saying right now. Still, thank you for the information." Fu Hua put on her glasses, stretched lazily as if she had not even warmed up yet, and smiled. "After all, there's no need to hide one's strength in front of a dead man."

Why did Cocolia leave the gem in this city... Shouldn't she be in a hurry to bring it back to headquarters?

It looks like I need to gather information about the Underground Safe quickly.

And since this is a trap, Kiana is in danger too. I must get her out of here immediately.

Before leaving, Fu Hua, deep in thought, failed to notice the venomous resentment on Welt's face. Or rather, she noticed it but did not care.

The instant she pulled open the door, the Poison Spider Mechas on the floor suddenly emitted a crisp mechanical voice. "Self-destruct system activated. Countdown: 5... 4... 3..."

Even Fu Hua could not remain calm upon hearing such an explosive mechanical announcement. After all, no one had a peculiar fetish for being blown up by bombs.

"Tch, that cunning vixen, Cocolia!"

As she spoke, Fu Hua abandoned any attempt to escape the blast zone through the main entrance. Instead, she turned and charged back into the room, crossed her arms before her chest, and rammed headfirst into the enormous floor-to-ceiling window.

Crash!

As countless shards of glass rained down from above, Fu Hua landed steadily on the ground, then vanished into a dark alley beneath the astonished gazes of passersby.

In the restaurant, the old man in white accepted the opened wine bottle from Kiana and thanked her warmly. "Thank you for helping me open this bottle of wine, kind Miss."

"You're welcome, Grandpa. Protecting humanity... oh, no, helping others is my..."

Ever-helpful Kiana pressed her left hand to her chest and spoke with great pride.

Unfortunately, before she could finish, the entire building began to shake violently from the self-destruction of the Poison Spider robots.

End of Chapter
Novel
How was this translation?

Explore the wiki