Real Estate Investment

"Lord Xiuchuan, I heard you haven't been reading the papers much lately?" Changchuan asked.

"Oh, it's nothing. I've heard that 'That Dead Big Guy' tech stocks have plummeted lately, the inflation index is climbing worse than Zichuan Canxing's blood pressure, and bank interest is lower than the nails on Shirakawa's high heels—the most reliable investment now is real estate! I was just wondering whether you might be interested."

"Oh, that... you do have a point. Do you have anything good to recommend?"

"Ah, my lord, what a coincidence! You've come to exactly the right person! Look, I happen to have a residence: thirteen by sixteen square meters, a three-story building, located in the central district of Longke City, capital of Shalu Province. Convenient transportation, pleasant surroundings, excellent development prospects—it's bound to appreciate! Here, these are the map and photographs. I have the deed."

"Mm, it looks quite good. I just wonder about the price? I don't have much money..."

"My lord, what's our relationship? Talking about money? You're looking down on me too much!—But since you brought it up, let's just say twenty thousand."

Zichuan Xiu secretly rejoiced. A house in that location would normally sell for two hundred thousand—but he still put on a deeply troubled expression. "I see, Changchuan... You know your lord is a poor officer too, without much savings. I can't produce that much all at once... How about fifteen thousand?"

Changchuan hesitated for a moment, then finally said with great reluctance, "Who told me to be short of money lately? Sigh, my lord, let's make the deal at once! Please keep the deed safe. The money..."

Changchuan's eagerness made Zichuan Xiu a little suspicious. He picked up the deed and examined it from every angle...

Changchuan looked deeply insulted. "My lord, how can you doubt my character and credibility? Look, the deed was issued by the Longke City government of Shalu Province, and it even bears the official seal—since you don't trust me, I might as well go talk to Roger—"

"Hey, hey, don't go, don't go! Fine, fine, I'll pay you." Zichuan Xiu pulled a stack of foul-smelling banknotes from inside a shoe beneath his bed and counted them out to Changchuan one by one...

"Good, then our money and goods are both settled. No backing out!"

They spoke at the same time, then laughed together with a "Heh heh"—their smiles were indescribably sleazy!

Five minutes later, Roger and Shirakawa came in.

"My lord, Changchuan said you've recently taken an interest in real estate? I have an ancestral property in Shaja City, Far East, and I've been planning to let it go..."

"My lord, I also have a property at North Sea in Minsk Province that I'm planning to cash out..."

Zichuan Xiu examined their property documents one by one and found no problems. Puzzled, he asked, "Why are you all selling real estate? Changchuan too, just now..."

"Oh, my lord, Changchuan went to Spring Return House and got caught by Zhibu Shao's 'anti-pornography and illegal publications' office. He has to pay a fine."

"Then Roger is because..."

"Roger lost money gambling and is being chased down and hacked at by loan sharks."

"Then what's your reason, Shirakawa?"

Shirakawa's eyes reddened, tears glistening at the corners. She took out a handkerchief and wiped her face. "My mother's eldest aunt's cousin's fiancée's younger brother's neighbor has stomach cancer. The operation costs a great deal of money... I have no choice. The reserve force salary is low, so I can only sell off the family property passed down through generations."

She covered her face with the handkerchief and began to cry.

Zichuan Xiu suddenly felt terribly sorry for her. He had been the one to get her into the reserve force, and he had even swindled away her hard-earned savings to "pull strings through the back door"... What little conscience he had left actually began to ache—an occurrence rare in recent years!

So he only haggled their already-low prices down by half before closing the deals, paying on the spot.

Zichuan Ning came in. "Big Brother, what are you grinning foolishly at that pile of papers for?"

"Oh, Ning, do you remember Big Brother once said he'd give you a big doll?"

"I remember. That was seven years ago—but you never gave it to me! And the computer, game console, cosmetics, Chanel set you promised me... and all the money you borrowed from me! And you haven't paid rent or food expenses for so long, and—"

"Ning, don't I always teach you that you're going to succeed the Chief Commander? You need to have a broad heart! You remember those chicken-skin-and-garlic-scraps little matters so clearly, honestly—never mind the rest. The day after tomorrow, I'll go buy you a doll from a secondhand market stall! Once I flip this real estate..."

Zichuan Ning leaned closer to inspect the deeds and properties.

"Ning, I've suddenly discovered that I have a real talent for business—I'm wondering whether I should quit my job and plunge into commerce. This Deputy Commander post is half-dead anyway—hey, where are you going? I'm discussing serious matters with you!"

Zichuan Ning went out, then returned carrying a stack of newspapers. She spread them out one by one, their headlines more eye-searing than the last:

"Far East Rebellion Spreading Like Wildfire, Longke City in Mortal Peril!"

"Flash! Rioters Breach Longke City! Lin Wei, Red Guard Captain and Governor of Shalu Province, Dies for the Nation! Five Thousand Family Members Die for the Nation!"

"Longke City Burned to Bare Earth by Rioters! Rebel Army Begins Massacre of Humans!"

"Top-Level Crisis! Shaja City, Yun Province, Surrounded by Rebel Forces!"

"Urgent Appeal! Large Rebel Forces Appear in Minsk Province; Seven Areas Including North Sea and Sanglong Have Already Fallen!"

"Far East Army Red Guard Captain Li Ke Appointed Commander of the Rebel-Suppression Forces!"

"Army of Five Divisions Sets Out to Suppress Rebellion, Its Bearing Majestic!"

"'The Rebels Will Soon Be Crushed!'—Li Ke's Interview with This Reporter"

"Song of Sorrow in Blue Blood! Chronicle of the Far East Rebel-Suppression Army's Bloody Battle"

"Loyal Heart, Crimson Soul! Lord Li Ke Will Live Forever in Our Hearts..."

"Special Dispatch: Utterly Shameless! Beastmen Division Garrison Stationed in Yun Province Mutinies!"

"The Entirety of Shalu Province Has Fallen; Not a Single Living Human Remains—Interview with Hu Hai, a Minor Banner Warrior Who Escaped Death"

"I Kissed the God of Death—Hu Hai Describes His Daring Escape"

"Flash: Snake Clan Garrison Troops in Minsk Province Mutiny! Minsk'an, Provincial Capital, Has Fallen"

"Conservative estimate: the number of people taking part in the rebellion has already reached three hundred thousand—Military experts discuss the Far East Incident."

"Just received notification from the Commanders' Office: 'In order to stabilize the army's morale, your paper is henceforth forbidden from reporting news of the war in the Far East Region!'"

"From now on, this paper's theme will be the wholesome topic of 'A Boy Falls in Love with a Girl.' Authors are welcome to submit enthusiastically!"

Zichuan Xiu's expression changed drastically, going from green to white, then from white to black...

"Big brother, don't be in such a rush! My uncle and the others made this huge mess, so let them clean it up themselves!"

"..."

"Brother, your face... it's terrifying!"

"..."

"I never knew Big Brother cared so much about affairs of state, about the country and its people... How noble!"

"Brother, you rushed out so urgently—did you eat something bad and need to use the toilet?"

"Roger, Changchuan, Shirakawa! You three bastards, get out here! How dare you toy with me! Tonight, I'll make you wish you were dead!"

"Where did you all go?"

"You there, the ones carrying bundles of luggage—stop right there! Don't run!"

"Ah, sir, you've got the wrong person—I'm not Roger! I'm Roger's twin older brother, Luokuang!"

"Yeah, this gentleman looks so familiar? Haven't we met somewhere before? Let me introduce myself—I'm Shirakawa's cousin, Baipi!"

"Oh, then of course I'm not Changchuan either—I'm Changchuan's younger brother's older brother! Does this gentleman need something from us?—Ah, we're all civilized people here, let's talk things over, don't be like this..."

"Exactly! Ah—how can you kick a lady in the butt, sir?!"

"Help!"