Dragged Out and Stewed

Autumn winds rise, and the three snakes are plump.

As a seasoned foodie, Lin Xian had long been craving the legendary chrysanthemum three-snake soup, rumored to be sweet, refreshing, and rich without being greasy, when he worked in Guangzhou in his previous life.

However, lacking both courage and time, this became a significant regret for him.

In this life, benevolent fate seemed to have heard his plea. The moment he opened his eyes, he saw someone on the opposite side stewing snake soup.

At this moment, the firewood was burning fiercely, and the water in the pot had already boiled.

On the grass opposite, a young man with blond hair and red eyes, a stern face, and a perfection that resembled a marble sculpture, was idly playing with a curved blade inlaid with rubies, chopping ingredients.

Within the misty vapor, the thrown-in onion chunks, celery leaves, and finely chopped mushrooms tumbled and churned, releasing an alluring aroma along with various base spices.

So tempting…

Hiss! No, it's cruel!

As a drop of splashing hot water scalded him, Lin Xian hurriedly swallowed his saliva, trying to hiss and gasp to relieve the burning sensation in his airway, irritated by the pepper.

Someone looked down at the scalding soup pot below, then glanced at the slender body hanging from the rack. His wandering thoughts were pulled back to the cruel reality, and his heart roared in frustration.

Hey, hey, hey! Is something wrong here!

I wanted to eat snake soup, not be hung up and stewed into snake soup!

That's right, the ingredients were already in the pot, just waiting for him, the main ingredient.

Lin Xian flicked the tip of his tail, which had been scalded by the boiling water. He looked at the mysterious black patterns covering his entire body, the layered, cool scales, and his forked tongue. His snake head was filled with bitter resentment.

Indeed, reality was even more magical.

In his previous life, he was an ordinary member of the Blue Star Chinese nation.

Facing the social tide, Lin Xian chose to honestly work 996 for benefits, lying down to be slaughtered. He was truly a good leek, content with his lot.

However, as an adult, one always has various pressures that need to be released.

Lu Xun once said that one either breaks out in silence or becomes perverted in silence.

Lin Xian was somewhat the latter. His favorite way to de-stress was to write online in his spare time to earn some living expenses.

After building up readers' anticipation, this guy with a morbid sense of humor would often suddenly ghost his work, disappearing amidst a storm of curses.

After changing his online persona and scamming a large number of readers, he grew accustomed to eating his meals while reading the furious comments in the comment section, filled with insults like "knife-wielder" and "pigeon soup."

Well, his appetite was excellent; he could eat an extra bowl every day.

However, fate is unpredictable. He, this prolific pigeon, was ultimately brought to justice by the light of righteousness.

A furious old reader, after reading seven or eight unfinished books, could no longer tolerate it. He grabbed his internet cable and cursed furiously.

But due to his beginner-level keyboard warrior skills, he couldn't out-argue the devious, bad-intentioned pigeon.

In his rage, this practical and irritable fellow used hacker skills to pinpoint his location, then traveled a thousand miles to find him and chopped him to death with a kitchen knife.

As the kitchen knife plunged into his chest, Lin Xian deeply understood a truth through this bloody lesson.

There is no good end for being a pigeon!

Perhaps it was retribution, but when Lin Xian opened his eyes, although he didn't turn into pigeon soup, he became snake soup about to be cooked.

However, he had already paid for the sins of his past life with one life.

Therefore, even after reincarnating as a snake, Lin Xian was not lacking in the will to survive.

The slender figure on the rack twisted restlessly. After a few struggles, a row of scales was even peeled off.

But Lin Xian finally discovered a cruel reality with sorrow.

He couldn't break free from this rope carved with strange cuneiform symbols.

Lin Xian's flexible tongue flicked around in his mouth. As he approached two hard, sharp objects, a hint of self-comforting hypnosis appeared in his dark vertical pupils.

It's okay, I have poison!

When the other party is caught off guard, won't I just jump up and slide tackle them!

However, when that chilling shadow loomed over Lin Xian's head, this snake, which had rehearsed countless counterattacks in its mind, immediately became like a spicy strip targeted by a flat-headed African brother.

The instinctive tremor in his heart and the uncontrollable trembling of his muscles made his entire body turn into a puddle of mud. He even forgot to react when his tail was scalded by the boiling water.

What a joke, a slide tackle!

Slide tackles are generally used against tigers, but the guy opposite could raise tigers and lions like cats – a freak!

The professional skills don't match!

The hot springs at a glance, the cuneiform script from the Two Rivers region, the familiar features, the luxurious gold decorations weighing at least ten catties, the proud and sinister smile on his lips…

All these signs, combined with disjointed memories from the original host in his mind, made Lin Xian realize just how terrifying this person was, no matter how foolish he was!

That's right, the one who was about to stew him was the Lord of Uruk, the Heroic King of ancient Babylonian mythology – Gilgamesh!

The world's earliest known heroic epic is "Gilgamesh," which originated from the civilization of the Two Rivers region.

It is an ode to Gilgamesh, the hero of Uruk, a city-state that ruled the ancient Mesopotamian region.

The handsome, cold, and arrogant blond youth before him was the living legend from the story.

According to epic records, in ancient times, the gods, to curb the growing power of humanity after its excessive reproduction, combined mortal royalty with goddesses to create Gilgamesh, the "wedge" that the gods used to control humanity.

As a being who was half-human and half-god, he possessed an extremely high divinity, with "two-thirds divine and one-third human," and held the viewpoints of both gods and humans.

In his youth, Gilgamesh was a highly respected and beloved ideal ruler, possessing kingly qualities superior to any other on earth: tolerance, thoughtfulness, justice, and virtue.

Passersby on the road all praised him and were captivated by him.

As time passed, years later, Gilgamesh matured from youth to young adulthood.

At this point, Gilgamesh decided to create a torrential rain to admonish humanity, no longer content with merely being a ruler who managed them.

To set the standard for humanity, he arbitrarily seized and accumulated wealth.

However, due to concerns that Gilgamesh was not fulfilling his duty to suppress humanity, the gods created the warrior Enkidu, the "chain of heaven," to oppose Gilgamesh during his youth.

Upon reaching adulthood, to display the gods' wrath and bring Gilgamesh back to their side, the two met and fought, ending in a draw.

After the battle, Gilgamesh and Enkidu, having encountered an equal for the first time, became friends.

To protect Uruk and prevent its people from starving, they joined forces to defeat the divine beast "Humbaba" in the cedar forest, guiding Uruk onto the right path and bringing it prosperity.

With Enkidu's assistance, Gilgamesh created a prosperous civilization, thereby becoming an excellent tyrant.

Later, because the two angered the gods, the sky god Anu dispatched the strongest divine beast, the Bull of Heaven, to be unleashed upon the mortal realm.

Gilgamesh and Enkidu worked together to repel the Bull of Heaven, saving the land from the devastation of floods.

However, the combined resistance of the "chain of heaven" and the "wedge of heaven" infuriated the gods.

For some reason, unable to punish Gilgamesh, they cursed Enkidu, who could not disobey the gods, to weaken and die as a form of punishment.

Having lost his dear friend, Gilgamesh fell into overwhelming grief and shadow, unable to control himself.

Witnessing Enkidu's death firsthand, Gilgamesh realized that he too would eventually die, and thus embarked on a journey to the underworld in search of eternal life.

He crossed mountains and rivers, enduring all sorts of hardships, and finally met an old man named Utnapishtim in the underworld, where he obtained the herb of immortality.

As a son of man with flesh and blood, he decided to bring the power of immortality back to his city-state.

On his return journey to Uruk, Gilgamesh bathed himself in a clear spring, his spirit and body liberated from all constraints.

However, at this moment, a snake took advantage of his rest and stole the herb of immortality, gaining the ability to shed its skin and be reborn.

So, that's right.

Lin Xian also became one of the main characters in the epic of Gilgamesh...

Except, he was the snake that stole the herb of immortality.

"You have quite the nerve, daring to swallow my property, you mongrel!"

The Heroic King Gilgamesh crossed his arms over his chest, looking down coldly from above. His eyes, like blood-red gems, glinted with a chilling amusement.

"Tsk, if I stew you now, the effects should still be there."

Lin Xian's body trembled uncontrollably as he stared at the scalding boiling water in the pot, a shiver running down his spine.

It seemed he would soon be transformed from a snake into snake soup.