Because I Am Surtr
Chapter 46

Section Forty-One · When Happiness Comes Knocking (Continued)

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Persephone really did take off her outerwear and undergarments right in front of her, leaving her slender, fair, even somewhat pale body completely exposed to Surtr's eyes. The Queen of the Underworld's body possessed the refinement and splendor befitting the name of a goddess. Aside from her chest, every curve perfectly conformed to the golden ratio, and every inch of skin was flawless and immaculate. A cool, secluded air surrounded her, making what ordinary people would see as flaws seem natural and fitting—as though she were the surviving statue of Venus, whose broken arms had instead created a beauty born of imperfection.

Surtr merely watched her indifferently—or perhaps without feeling at all—as though this beauty were shallow and pale, utterly worthless and meaningless in her eyes.

The naked girl slowed her steps slightly as she passed by.

"If you had killed me just now, or pinned me to the floor, the bed, or somewhere else and ravaged me mercilessly, how interesting would that have been?"

"But that is merely the reaction of a mortal. Only mortals feel shame, anger, sorrow, and lose control. It is precisely because you do nothing that you are worthy of my special attention. Surtr, my opponent, my ally, my kindred—I look forward to the fate that awaits us both."

She whispered beside the Flame-haired Woman's ear, then continued forward into the designated shower area. The patter of water soon rang out, but the crisp, suggestive sound of droplets striking one another held no allure for the other occupant of the room.

Five minutes. Ten minutes. Fifteen minutes.

Persephone remained in the bathroom for the amount of time a girl would normally spend bathing.

When she emerged draped in a towel, she found, unsurprisingly, only an open window and an empty hall. Her gaze swept across the tabletop, and the corners of her lips lifted slightly.

"At least it wasn't a total loss." She walked to the empty seat at the head of the table, took up the other set of utensils, and put the exquisite dishes—whose heat had mostly dissipated—into her mouth. She tasted a little of everything, then summoned a drone to transport the leftovers away for disposal.

"Average."

The goddess of the present world delivered her verdict.

Surtr left the Sarcophagus and the temporary command center. If possible, she even wanted to leave Chernobog.

She felt fear.

Fear of that version of herself... who actually felt not the slightest bit of fear.

It was contradictory, but it was the truth. She landed atop an abandoned skyscraper, ignoring the drones patrolling and circling the surrounding area.

She pressed a hand to her chest.

Was this thing really beating? Or was there nothing inside but a stone? Perhaps she should cut it out and take a look. Maybe then she could prove that she was nothing more than the Tin Man who had encountered Dorothy, with nothing in her chest but an exquisitely crafted self-winding clock.

Yet she could sense her heartbeat.

Steady, powerful, and... utterly without fluctuation.

Perhaps it really was a heart made of flesh... perhaps.

She leaned against a pillar and sank down, her gaze dropping before she—sighed soundlessly.

If it were a normal person, an ordinary person with normal likes and dislikes... If it were Amiya, Kal'tsit, Yelena, W, or Talulah... If any one of them had been in that room in her place, hearing those words and witnessing those things, what would they have done?

Perhaps they would have been angry. Perhaps disappointed. Perhaps furious. Perhaps sorrowful.

Perhaps they would have attacked Persephone, cut ties with her, slapped her, or even wounded her with a weapon. Or perhaps, after everything, they would still have chosen to forgive her... That was what normal people did, wasn't it? Normal people possessed the full range of emotions, and knew the difference between malice and kindness.

But what about her?

—I had never hated, detested, or rejected Persephone. I had never rejected her personally, nor had I ever rejected what she did.

That was why she could cooperate with her so intimately, speak with her so calmly, and respond to all sorts of matters with perfect coordination despite having crossed swords only moments before. There was no anxiety, no friction—only cooperation and progress, as though they were the two hands of a single person.

—I had never hated her, so naturally, I could not hate anyone else.

—Do I... really have to go on like this?

Her heartbeat did not quicken, her pulse did not rise, and her glands did not secrete any additional hormones. Yet memories continued to surge through her mind. Some were unfamiliar, some familiar, and some close enough to touch.

"Have you ever truly been angry? Have you ever truly cared about anyone?" —Talulah

"So stones can talk after all?" —Yelena

"Sister Surtr, you can actually relax a little..." —Amiya

"If only you weren't all talk, and would actually do something." —W

"You and I are the same kind. You have merely chosen a different way to play." —Persephone

"You're so pitiful." —???

"..."

"..."

"..."

She sank into contemplation.

The scales in her heart were shifting. Some things that had once been indestructible were cracking inch by inch amid the rumbling. The river of memories from the past ran dry and broke apart. A new understanding of the world was trying to replace the old.

Night fell.

The sun descended and the moon rose. Before long, the moon reached the center of the sky, accompanied by a dense spread of stars.

—I am... Surtr.

She turned her head and shifted her gaze. A small food container sat by her feet, liquefied droplets dampening the ground as the fragrance of honey and cream spread through the air.

It was ice cream, the portion Persephone had made. She had unconsciously taken it with her when she left. In this northern city of Chernobog, chilled desserts did not melt easily.

Try it.

She picked up the spoon and put the ice cream into her mouth. The sensation on her tongue was sweet and refreshing. It tasted exactly like the flavor in her memories; the only difference was perhaps that it had been made by a different person.

—I am, Surtr.

"Average." She gave her verdict, but still ate every last bite in the container. Then she set the container and spoon aside, sat against the pillar on the rooftop, and gazed up at the stars.

The starry sky of Terra had always been indistinct. Even when the stars filled the heavens, only a few people could identify them with the naked eye.

Did she have a place of her own among the stars?

No, this world was different. This was not Teyvat from Genshin Impact, so where would there be a celestial seat to house one's destined star?

—I am Surtr.

The decision was made. Persephone's words had been the final grain of sand that tipped the scales.

"Provoking me is useless. You should understand that better than I do, Persephone. So..."

"...have I reached the point where even you find it necessary to pay me a little attention?"

She extended her fist and clenched it.

End of Chapter
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