Being an Idiot Is a Way of Life

"Second match, Teuchi versus Okano Nisuke!"

One of the two students was wrapped head to toe in bandages, while the other was skin and bones. This was a match that should have taken place in an intensive care unit. Neither specialized in close-range taijutsu. After throwing kunai, using the Substitution Technique, throwing shuriken, using the Clone Technique, tossing smoke bombs, and using the Transformation Jutsu, the panting Teuchi knocked the swaying Okano Nisuke down with a single punch. They demonstrated the limited attack methods expected of academy students, as well as their frail, sickly physiques. Still, overall, their standards were acceptable. Compared to students in peacetime, these academy students living under the shadow of war had already become proficient with what they had learned.

"Second match, Teuchi wins!"

Although the fight had lacked any highlights and both students' physical condition left much to be desired, Aida-sensei was quite satisfied. He could not expect everyone to be a genius like Kakashi. The second match had already met his expectations.

"Fifth match, Nohara Rin..."

"Ah, it's Rin!" Obito, whose kidneys had taken a blow, was instantly revived at the mention of Rin's name.

"...versus Sarutobi Asuma!"

"!" Asuma froze, then turned to Obito with wild delight on his face. "Hehe, despair, Obito! I won't go easy on her!"

"Please, go easy on her! From now on, I'll be your little brother." Obito immediately began groveling. How could Rin, a commoner, defeat the Hokage's son, who had received elite training since childhood? Obito might have been dumb, but he was not insane.

"That's impossible, Obito. To respect this match, I'll use my full strength!" Asuma righteously rejected the shameful deal. Leaning down beside Obito's ear, he sinisterly whispered, "Obito, live on with your hatred and despair toward me!"

Asuma kicked away Obito, who was hugging his thigh and howling in tears, then strode into the arena in two steps. With Earth Release: Swamp of the Underworld, he trapped Rin, who had intended to circle around and attack, then gentlemanly knocked her unconscious. Facing Obito's nearly murderous glare, he even claimed that he had gone easy on her—he had originally wanted to use Earth Release: Earth Dragon Bullet.

"..." Duke stood silently to one side, already preparing to build Asuma a gravestone when he got home. You were acting so cocky. Did the Third Hokage know? Who did you think Obito would destroy the world for? Kid, you had successfully courted death. So I would not get dragged down by you, our friendship ended here. Out of humanitarian concern, after you die, I shall raise your wife myself. Do not worry! In short, Asuma, go in peace!

Match after match followed, and soon it was Duke's turn. His opponent was...

"Tenth match, Mitarashi Duke versus Yūhi Kurenai!"

"Go, Duke! I choose you! Beat her up hard! You have to avenge me!" Obito once again hugged someone's thigh, only to be kicked away again.

"Duke, I have several pretty good ninjutsu scrolls here. I think we can discuss them after school!" This time, Asuma was the one who could not stay calm, hugging Duke's thigh.

"Hmph! Asuma, what are you doing? Are you trying to interfere with this fair match? You disgrace the Hokage's son!" Obito got back up and kicked Asuma away, imitating his earlier tone. "A ninja duel must not be insulted. Duke will not go easy on her. He will use his full strength, because that is his respect for Kurenai."

Karma came quickly. Asuma wailed endlessly and could only hope that Duke was a fraud. It was not that Asuma looked down on Kurenai. In any world, women were at a disadvantage on the battlefield. Speed, strength, endurance—women lagged behind men in nearly every respect. It was innate. Even Tsunade, the sole woman among the Sannin and the pinnacle of all female ninja, was famous among the Sannin for her Medical Ninjutsu.

Without the slightest hesitation, Duke entered the training ground first. Across from him stood a little girl with rosy lips, white teeth, and red eyes. She was quite cute. Asuma and Obito did not think highly of women, but Duke did not agree. Women could hold up half the sky. In the future, when the Five Kage joined forces against Uchiha Madara, two of them would be women. Besides, the hidden boss Ōtsutsuki Kaguya was also a woman. In the Hokage World, women were dangerous—especially women who could use ninjutsu!

"Duke, make sure to go easy on her! And Kurenai, don't lose heart!" Asuma shouted from outside the arena. The "goddess" he had once confessed to was fighting the goddess he currently admired. It felt like an eight-o'clock evening drama.

Duke ignored him, but Yūhi Kurenai shot Asuma an annoyed glance.

Smoking, lechery, reckless confessions, disrespect toward women—what an idiot! Generally speaking, leaving that sort of impression in a woman's mind meant there was no hope. Poor Asuma, he still had a long road ahead in love.

Yūhi Kurenai looked at Duke and drew a kunai, going on guard. This was her first time seeing Duke up close. She had to admit, his delicate little face made Kurenai feel somewhat ashamed of herself.

Why did a guy have to be so pretty?

"Aren't you going to use Illusion Techniques? You'll be at a disadvantage if we compete in taijutsu." With Hades on his head and his hands on his hips, Duke offered a well-meaning reminder. Whether it was taijutsu or ninjutsu, he was confident that he held an overwhelming advantage. Of the three major ninja disciplines—taijutsu, ninjutsu, and genjutsu—only genjutsu was something he had yet to experience. Now that he had encountered a future genjutsu jonin, he was eager to give it a try.

Illusion Techniques were a form of mental attack. Through powerful spiritual intent, along with seemingly casual yet concealed movements, sounds, images, drugs, or objects, they caused the target to fall into a dazed mental state and experience all manner of illusions within their consciousness. Ninja generally used chakra to interfere with an opponent's five senses and disrupt their chakra, causing them to fall into hallucinations. Though the methods of attack varied greatly, their purpose was the same: disrupt the opponent's mind, seize control of their five senses, and drag them into a world of illusions.

"You know I can use Illusion Techniques?" Yūhi Kurenai asked doubtfully. As a female ninja, her physical attributes could not compare with those of male ninja, and no ninja with immense chakra reserves had ever appeared in her family. From the first day Yūhi Shinku taught his daughter, he had focused on cultivating her Illusion Techniques. Kurenai had also lived up to expectations, showing great talent and making excellent progress. Yet she had never mentioned any of this to anyone at the academy.

"As a qualified ninja, gathering intelligence is indispensable." Duke began making things up. Knowing the abilities of characters from the plot counted as intelligence gathering too... the ability to foresee the future. Anticipating the enemy's moves was a transmigrator's true Golden Finger.

"In that case..." Yūhi Kurenai pulled out a handful of shuriken and, together with her kunai, scattered them toward Duke like a rain of flowers. Using the hidden weapons as cover, she stepped forward several paces and formed hand seals. "Genjutsu: Demonic Illusion: Cherry Blossom Viewing!"

Dodging the hidden weapons, Duke immediately met Kurenai's eyes. A pulling force drew his attention toward her. Then the world spun, his head grew heavy, and an overwhelming drowsiness washed over him. As sleepiness assaulted him, Duke hurriedly bit his tongue, sending the chakra within him churning wildly. Illusion Techniques were intricate, but breaking them only required a simple and brutal method—being awakened by a teammate, or using immense chakra to forcefully break free.

His immense chakra instantly tore apart the illusion trap Kurenai had painstakingly constructed. Kurenai had never imagined that her classmate possessed such enormous chakra reserves. Her Illusion Technique was forcibly broken, and with no preparation, she suffered backlash. She let out a muffled groan, rolled her little red eyes, and adorably fainted.

"Ah—Kurenai!" Asuma looked as though his parents had died. Seeing him cry so miserably, anyone unaware of the situation might have thought the Third Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi, had died.

"Ahahaha! Nicely done! That's it!" Obito sang and danced in celebration, forming a sharp contrast with Asuma.

"So amazing... though I have no idea what happened!" Might Guy said admiringly. He did not understand it, but a win was a win.

"Kurenai lost?"

"What just happened? Didn't Kurenai launch an Illusion Technique? Why did she fall asleep herself?"

"I don't know. Maybe the Illusion Technique failed, and she suffered backlash!"

"What a shame!"

"..."

The bewildered onlookers filled in the blanks of the duel themselves. Kurenai, an honor student, could not possibly have been defeated by Duke, who was usually completely unmotivated. Therefore, Kurenai must have defeated herself. The minds of the masses were terrifying. Even when they knew nothing, they were always willing to believe the truth they had imagined.

"Tenth match, Mitarashi Duke wins!" Aida-sensei was very satisfied. The battle between the two students had lasted less than five seconds, yet it had been extremely exciting. A clash between Illusion Techniques might seem brief, but it was actually fraught with danger. The tenth match had already reached genin level. Duke, the victor, was naturally superior in substance, but Yūhi Kurenai was not to be underestimated either.

"Eleventh match, Uchiha Obito versus Fukuda Shoichi!"

"Hahaha, it's time for Lord Obito to take the stage!"

Facing the ordinary Fukuda Shoichi, Obito was full of confidence. The only regret was that Rin was still unconscious and would not get to see him show off.

"Damn Asuma! One day, I'll take you down!"

"Who do you think will win?" Asuma maliciously asked. "Probably Fukuda, right? He may be weak, but Obito is the dead last, so he's even weaker!"

"It won't be that simple. Obito is usually a little lousy, but his overall score is dragged down by the written exams. In actual combat, he has some redeeming qualities. If... he doesn't get careless." Duke wanted to help the future boss save some face, but for some reason, he felt that betting on Obito would only get him slapped in the face.

"No way! I think Obito's shuriken skills are really impressive!" Facing the two men pouring cold water on him, Might Guy spoke up loyally. He was indeed correct. The Uchiha clan's shuriken throwing was acknowledged as the best in Konoha. Although Obito was known as the Uchiha clan's disgrace, his shuriken throwing still ranked near the top of the class... of course, that came with one condition: he did not act like an idiot!

"Watch my Uchiha Style Shuriken Jutsu!" Obito reached toward his waist, about to unleash his ultimate technique. Across from him, Fukuda Shoichi faced him as though confronting a great enemy, running back and forth in an attempt to evade it.

Ten seconds later, Fukuda Shoichi stopped, panting as he looked at Obito in confusion. Where was the Uchiha Style Shuriken Jutsu he had been promised? Why had it not come yet? Was Obito trying to exhaust his stamina? Damn it, he had underestimated this dead last. He actually had such scheming!

"Um... uh... Aida-sensei... I left my Blade Tool pouch at home..."

Everyone collapsed!

"Eleventh match, Fukuda Shoichi wins!" Aida-sensei rolled his eyes and declared it cleanly without waiting for the match to continue.

"No! Aida-sensei, I still have Uchiha Style Taijutsu and Uchiha Style Fire Release—" The grief-stricken Obito was thrown out of the arena by Aida-sensei, leaving Fukuda Shoichi as the victor.

"See? I told you! Obito definitely couldn't win!" Asuma wore an expression that said he had known everything all along as he pulled a lollipop shaped like a cigarette from his Blade Tool pouch.

"Hehe!" Duke wiped the sweat from his forehead. Only now did you realize you had not brought your Blade Tool pouch? Just how thick were your nerves? Luckily, he had not bet on Obito to win, or he would have been thoroughly slapped in the face. Might Guy's face was already swollen!