Chapter 257

She wanted to finish quickly so she could go home. Hua Xin still remembered the regret and sadness. Why couldn't she even blend into a crowd alone? Why did Xia Yan, who claimed he would help, forget that she was talking to those girls? In fact, the girl felt that this handout of help was so insignificant. She wanted to grasp it but couldn't. Until the knock on the door. But how long had she deceived Xia Yan? How could she resolve all this? "I wasn't worried about this," Hua Xin said softly. "I know you wouldn't." Her hair flew wildly in the wind, making it difficult to see the sea clearly. She could only see... it was getting dark. Xia Yan paused, then smiled slightly, "That's good." But his smile carried an indelible bitterness. His gaze, however, unconsciously drifted towards the sea, not the girl beside him, but then he heard the girl's voice again. Hua Xin said softly, "I have very few friends, only a few." "I don't have a home." "I spent a large part of my life alone in my house." "This world seems to be full of malice to me." "My parents divorced when I was young, I have depression, autism... I have many illnesses. You should stay far away from any girl who has even one of these." "I'm not normal." "Are you scared by me?" The girl's voice was light, as if none of this was a big deal. She was abnormal to begin with. How many miracles and unknown things are there in the world that made this seemingly absurd thing happen to her? But to Xia Yan's ears, it was so jarring. Xia Yan's heart ached terribly. He gripped the hem of his clothes tightly, trying to make his voice sound calm, "No, never." What he thought was what he said. He couldn't say anything more comforting. Why did it have to be like this? He didn't want the atmosphere between them to become like this, he didn't want to reopen the girl's wounds. To be hypocritical? For the first time, Xia Yan felt so guilty and painful about doing something wrong. If he could, he wouldn't want to pursue any more sense of security, nor would he want to know more about the girl. As long as she was happy, that was enough. Regardless of the truth he was wondering about. "Actually, after all this time, you probably already know," Hua Xin continued softly, "I'm dirt poor." "I always wear the same two outfits, and you always pay for my meals and shopping." "At first, when I suggested we have Online Relationship, it was just to scam you out of your money, to get revenge for winning so many games against me." "How bad am I?" "And you, like a fool, transferred so much money to me. Aren't you afraid I'll just disappear and vanish without a trace?" The implication was that she wanted to tell Xia Yan that this was her initial purpose in approaching him through the Online Relationship. "Money can be earned back." "You can take everything I have."... She probably imagined how Xia Yan would react. Outrageous disdain is the least likely outcome. Perhaps there might be initial shock, but she'd quickly adjust her emotions and return to her previous gentle demeanor. After all, people tend to be more sensitive when money is involved, whether it's paying for things or borrowing money... money is always the most important thing. In this cold and busy era, relationships often seem fragile; a slight touch on the bottom line can shatter a precarious bond. Ultimately, the most probable result is that Xia Yan doesn't care about this at all. Or perhaps, this is simply the Xia Yan she knows? Hua Xin didn't know what expression to make. The fiery sunset seemed to ignite the entire world, gradually eroding the sky's original color, leaving only impending darkness. She wanted Xia Yan to hate her. She wanted Xia Yan to say it out loud: she was a terrible person, someone who approached him with ulterior motives, after money, a very, very bad person, saying, "So this is the kind of person you are. All my previous feelings were wasted." Even if it would cause Hua Xin a lifetime of sorrow and endless tears, the girl wanted to end this doomed farce. She had been lying to him from beginning to end. But why... couldn't she say it? Although she desperately wanted Xia Yan to say it himself, he could never utter those words, because he loved her, loved her deeply. Were Xia Yan Gu Xin Hua and Hua Xin the same person? These questions plagued Hua Xin for a long, long time. As her relationship with Xia Yan grew closer, she asked herself, could she bear to give up this life? Four years—not a long time, not a short time. It was just like the years she spent in her Little Black during high school, the days passing by, and she only had to worry about what to eat each day. But now it was different. Hua Xin's world had been quietly changed by someone. Changed in ways she herself couldn't believe. "Listen to me, Xin Hua." A coat was suddenly draped over her shoulders. The strong sea breeze no longer clung to the girl's exposed skin, nor could it penetrate the pale blue coat. Underneath the coat, the girl's left hand was tightly gripping the bracelet on her right wrist. Strands of hair fluttering wildly in her vision seemed to divide the setting sun and the sea into several pieces. In the distance, the massive shipwreck, a popular spot for young couples during the day, lay forlornly on the boundless ocean. Hua Xin lowered her voice, trying to keep it calm, and responded to the man beside her. "Mmm," she replied, her voice slightly hoarse. "At first, I didn't think you were a girl." "You like playing games and watching anime. After spending time with you, I discovered that you also like the hobbies that I have hidden in real life. That special feeling is something I've never experienced before." "Before seeing you in person, I also wondered what kind of person you were." "Probably a tomboyish type most of the time." Xia Yan kept fiddling with the bracelet on her wrist, her eyelids slightly lowered as she slowly recounted the story. When she said the last sentence, her tone carried a hint of a smile, as if the memory she had left behind was quite amusing. "Until I saw you at the subway entrance." "You looked so good in that JK uniform that day. I don't know why, I remember there were so many people there, but the moment I saw you, I had the thought, 'This is definitely you.'" "Gu Xin Hua so cute, so cute it breaks my heart." "I don't know why a simple bouquet of flowers and an ordinary cup of milk tea can make her so happy, her eyes seem to sparkle." "I feel sorry for you." "I can feel your emotions." "I've never seen someone who, when Online Relationship, only carefully scams two hundred yuan a month from a man." She even bought a slightly nicer lipstick...