Proof of Being Alive (Part 1)

(Am I dead? Am I dead?)

Zheng Zha stood there blankly, his mind still vividly recalling what had happened a second ago. That monster from his nightmares had lunged straight at him, its enormous claws already before his eyes. All it would take was an instant, just one instant, and he would be torn to pieces!

(So... am I dead?)

Zheng Zha stared blankly at the scene before him. He was standing on an incomparably vast platform, at the center of which floated an enormous sphere of light. Like the sun, it illuminated the entire platform. Beyond the platform in every direction lay boundless darkness, a deep black void without the faintest trace of light. After only a few glances into that darkness, Zheng Zha already felt dizzy.

"We survived! Damn it, that was close! We finally survived!"

Zhang Jie's voice suddenly rang out. Only then did Zheng Zha snap back to his senses. Besides himself, Zhang Jie, Zhan Lan, and Li Xiaoyi were also on the platform. No—apart from the four of them, a girl suddenly ran out from a room at the edge of the platform. Crying, she rushed toward Zhang Jie. For the first time, the burly man wore such a tender expression. He ran toward her as well, then grabbed her in his arms and kissed her passionately in front of everyone.

"...If there's anything you don't understand about the rules, ask the Main God. Just communicate with it through your thoughts..."

"Other than creating yourself a woman, don't exchange for anything else! Wait until tomorrow before doing anything! Oh, right, pick any room you like. Just imagine what you want it to look like..."

Zhang Jie ran into a room with the woman in his arms without even turning back. He only had time to say those two sentences before the pair disappeared through the doorway, leaving Zheng Zha and the other two staring at each other. After a long while, all three suddenly collapsed to the ground.

"That guy's amazing. He can still run that fast, and he actually has the mood to do that sort of thing..."

Lying weakly on the ground, Zhan Lan said, "I was terrified back then. My hands and feet are still weak now. I never thought that guy would act like nothing happened..."

After talking for a while, she realized no one was listening. When she turned her head, she saw the two men standing beneath the sphere of light with their eyes closed. Judging by the bulges beneath their lower bodies, they were probably both imagining the women they wanted.

"You two idiots! Men are all idiots! We barely survived and went through such a huge scare, yet the first thing you think of after getting back is sex! Men are all giant idiots!"

Fuming, Zhan Lan charged into one of the rooms. She shoved open the door and rushed inside. With a loud bang, the sound of the door slamming shut startled the two men out of their closed-eye states. They both smiled awkwardly, then closed their eyes again.

It was a very strange feeling. As long as Zheng Zha stood beneath the sphere of light and closed his eyes, he felt as though he had merged with it. Before him appeared a screen resembling a computer control panel. Four major categories were listed there: Technology, Magic and Legends, Assistance, and Entertainment. Beyond that were his six personal attributes: Intelligence, Mental Power, Cell Vitality, Nerve Reaction Speed, Muscle Strength, and Immunity Strength. The remaining entries were Reward Points and Horror Movie Side Story counts.

Zheng Zha saw that his six attributes were Intelligence 107, Mental Power 122, Cell Vitality 97, Nerve Reaction Speed 131, Muscle Strength 112, and Immunity Strength 103. Aside from exercising regularly and having slightly greater Muscle Strength than an average person, his other attributes were about the same as an ordinary person's. His Mental Power and Nerve Reaction Speed had increased because he received rewards during the Horror Movie, gaining twenty and thirty extra points respectively.

He had 6,502 Reward Points. One thousand came from completing a Horror Movie, another five thousand were rewards from a B-Class Side Story, and another five hundred came from other rewards. As for the remaining two points, he had probably earned them by killing more than twenty zombies.

"Create a woman for myself, create a woman for myself..."

Zheng Zha had no plans to use his Reward Points to exchange for items or strengthen himself today. After several brushes with death in the first Horror Movie, he had already learned the importance of caution. Although he had quite a few Reward Points, he intended to ask Zhang Jie before seeing what he could strengthen or exchange for. Right now, his mind held only one thought.

(Loli... can I create Loli?)

The Main God's sphere of light seemed able to discern Zheng Zha's thoughts. The Entertainment category instantly opened, and one option began enlarging in his mind. A stiff yet solemn voice spoke.

"Your first creation of a humanoid life-form is free. Every subsequent creation will cost 500 Reward Points. Please simulate in your mind the life-form's type, sex, appearance, height, age, skin color, race..."

Zheng Zha slowly sank into his memories. That year... it had still been his innocent childhood. A faint crush, a subtle ambiguity. What he remembered most clearly was the fragrance drifting from her beautiful hair, her smile, her voice, her memories...

That lifeless existence that had seemed as dull as death had been because she was gone... The reason he had kept falling into darkness was because he had lost her little hand...

"So long as you are by my side, my heart will never fall into darkness..."

A tear slowly spilled from the corner of Zheng Zha's closed eye, then fell to the ground and shattered out of sight.

When he opened his eyes, a giggling girl stood before him. She looked around fifteen or sixteen, with long beautiful hair, snow-white skin, misty eyes, and crimson lips. This girl was clearly the figure etched so deeply into his memories, the one he would never forget—Loli.

They had been childhood sweethearts. Her presence had been as natural as the breeze at his side. He had grown so used to it that he no longer noticed, yet they both knew how important they were to each other. Children in the city were mostly lonely. In that jungle of steel and concrete, even the other side of the door was sealed behind another heavy metal door. People could live beside one another for years without even knowing what their neighbors looked like. Children raised in cities were especially lonely.

Zheng Zha had always considered himself lucky. His parents were straightforward, generous people who liked talking loudly and inviting their neighbors over to share good food. By chance, the couple next door had the same sort of personalities. Such people were exceedingly rare in the city. Most fortunately of all, he had met the little girl next door, who was one year younger than him.

She was like something cherished by the gods, perfect as a transparent crystal without the slightest bubble or flaw. She was clever, kind, and strong. Unlike her soft, delicate appearance, she was a girl who loved laughing and making noise, someone no difficulty could frighten. She always liked wrapping her arms around his neck to tease him and blowing into his ear.

He thought that as long as she was by his side, his heart would never grow cold.

But why was human life so fragile? She had been fifteen that year. Lying on a white hospital bed, she had looked so frail. Radiation therapy had caused all of her long hair to fall out, and the blush of health had vanished from her pale face. Only that bright, open smile remained. Yet he knew that smile was merely to comfort the family around her... and him.

What was human life, exactly? Why had she been smiling so beautifully one moment in his memories, then become ashes inside a porcelain urn the next? He did not want this. He still wanted to see her gentle smile, to see her rolling around on top of him, to see her blow into his ear. He did not want this...

He drifted through the sea of people, through a black-and-white world. Fights and disputes among classmates, the tangled lusts and legendary youth of university, the exhausting work after graduation that seemed to prove he was still alive. He kept falling, kept rotting away. One woman after another, sleeping together and then breaking up. One bar after another, women, ecstasy, crystal meth, perhaps even heroin before long...

"So long as you are by my side, my heart will never fall into darkness..."

When Zheng Zha woke up, the clock on the wall already showed eleven in the morning. Scratching his head, he was about to reach for the cigarettes on the bedside table when his arm touched something incomparably soft.

"Mm... don't bother me. Let me sleep a little longer..."

An utterly enchanting voice immediately sounded from beneath the blanket. Zheng Zha froze. Instinctively, he squeezed that round, soft mass. A small protrusion in his palm slowly hardened, while the voice let out an even more alluring moan.

The options on the computer screen, the Horror Movie reincarnation, Resident Evil 1, death, and Loli...

Memories spun endlessly through Zheng Zha's mind. He abruptly threw back the covers. Sure enough, a breathtakingly beautiful girl was curled up against his chest. She looked around fifteen or sixteen. Her skin was as white as snow, even brighter than the white bedsheet. Setting aside her appearance, there were also two tear tracks on her little face. Zheng Zha looked down along her body and saw mottled bloodstains on her thighs and the bedsheet.

The girl reached for the blanket that had been covering her, but failed to grab it. So she shifted closer to Zheng Zha. Her eyes remained shut as she slept in a daze, and she did not even notice when both hands grasped something hard.

Zheng Zha only remembered that when he created a person at the Main God yesterday, he had kept recalling Loli from his mind—every word and smile, every movement and gesture. Not only had he imagined her completely, he had also recalled countless memories about her one by one. Then, when he opened his eyes and saw the beauty before him, the emotions he had suppressed for nearly ten years erupted all at once. He had randomly chosen a room and taken her there. They had made love countless times through the night, until she cried and begged for mercy, and only then had they fallen asleep embracing each other.

At that moment, the girl's hands were tightly gripping his hardness, leaving him afraid to move even slightly. Looking at that face, so familiar yet so unfamiliar, Zheng Zha felt as if he had a thousand things to say but could not utter a single word. Before he knew it, his eyes were brimming with hot tears.

The girl seemed to feel cold and reached toward herself again, but still found nothing in her hands. She secretly opened her eyes a sliver and saw Zheng Zha staring at her intently. Her face immediately flushed with embarrassment. She hurriedly struggled up and snatched the blanket from his hands, wrapping it tightly around herself several times. Only then did she feel a stabbing pain in her lower body, and she could not help bursting into tears.

Crying, the girl said, "Damn Zheng Zha, stupid Zheng Zha! You hurt me so much yesterday, and you're bullying me again first thing in the morning! You bad guy! I even made you breakfast this month. You promised you'd give me a ring when I turned eighteen, and that we wouldn't do that until after we got married at twenty-two. You big bad guy! I still have several months before I turn sixteen..."

Zheng Zha shuddered from head to toe. He suddenly grabbed the girl's little hand. "You... Loli, do you have memories? Do you remember what came before?"

The girl stopped crying after a while. She kept sneaking glances at Zheng Zha from the corners of her eyes. Hearing his words, she said oddly, "What do you mean? What do you mean, do I remember what came before? Why are you talking so unclearly? And... Mr. Pervert! Please put some clothes on, then go to my house and bring me my green dress. You tore all my clothes yesterday... Hmph, luckily Mom and Dad have already gone to work, or how would you explain this!"

Zheng Zha's heart shook violently. The girl's expression, tone, movements, even the adorable way she huffed—she was clearly a replica of the Loli in his memories. No, she was exactly the same! Only then did he notice the room. This was clearly his own bedroom from when he had lived with his parents more than ten years ago. Even the small furnishings were completely identical.

"Oh no, Uncle and Aunt must have heard us yesterday. Boohoo, now they'll definitely think I'm that kind of bad girl. You big bad guy, you pervert... Boohoo, I was supposed to learn cooking from Auntie during summer vacation. Now I'm too embarrassed to see her again..."

The girl began crying softly as she spoke. She looked like a pear blossom drenched by rain, leaving Zheng Zha utterly stunned. Then, as she cried, she suddenly wore an expression of embarrassed anger. She hurriedly began slapping Zheng Zha with both hands, but she was also too shy to let him see her body. After hitting him a few times, she wrapped the blanket tightly around herself again, then reached out to hit him a few more times. Her petite and adorable manner left Zheng Zha completely intoxicated.

"Wait, wait... could it be that I've been dreaming all along? Everything just now—no, even everything about you getting sick—was all a dream? Hahaha, so it was all just a dream!"

Zheng Zha laughed loudly and hugged Loli tightly. He kept laughing, ignoring how she struggled and bit him in his arms. But after laughing for a while, he began crying quietly. A grown man clutched a girl and wept without stopping. Loli gradually stopped struggling and instead wrapped her arms tightly around him.

(That's wonderful. So it was all just a dream. I don't want that future. I don't want it...)

Just then, knocking suddenly came from outside the living room door. Loli immediately grew embarrassed again and dove beneath the blanket, saying anxiously, "Uncle and Auntie are back! Boohoo, you big pervert, you big bad guy! How am I supposed to go out now? You tore all my clothes yesterday!"

But Zheng Zha felt a chill in his heart, because he could faintly hear someone calling his name. That voice belonged to Zhang Jie. In other words, he was not dreaming, and the Loli in his arms was merely a life-form he had created.

Zheng Zha forced a smile. "Loli, I'll go take a look and bring you some clothes. Be good. Stay here and don't wander around."

Fortunately, Loli had her head buried beneath the blanket and did not see Zheng Zha's expression. She merely huffed softly a few times, then lay still. Zheng Zha silently sighed, got dressed, and headed toward the living room.

Sure enough, every furnishing in the room was exactly the same as the home he had lived in more than ten years ago. Zheng Zha crossed the living room and opened the front door. Zhang Jie and the other three were indeed standing outside. Looking past them, he saw the platform plaza beyond the door, and at its center was that massive floating sphere of light.

"Wait for me a moment."

Before the three could speak, Zheng Zha hurriedly said this, then pushed past them and ran toward the Main God's sphere of light.

"Tell me, Main God, isn't she a life-form you created? Why does she have her memories? Why is she exactly like her? Why doesn't she know anything about this place? Tell me, Main God, what exactly is going on?"