"Meow?"
"Meow!"
"Lord Takeyasu, where are you going?"
In a flash, Uchiha Takeyasu vanished. Freed from his warm embrace, Tachibana landed lightly on a branch, her feline face full of confusion.
She had been looking forward to watching her master grind that ugly great ape to dust, so she could brag about it to the other Ninja Cats later. Anxious, she meowed nonstop.
"My master's calling, meow."
Feeling the Summoning Jutsu's pull, Tachibana leaped excitedly. Following the summoning formula, she sprang into the void and, in the blink of an eye, landed in her master's arms. Her curious eyes darted around. They were in the middle of a great mountain.
The mountain was full of peach trees heavy with fruit, their branches laden with ripe peaches.
On the thick branches stood apes with fierce faces and coats of many colors. Some were empty-handed; others carried knives, spears, swords, or axes. They surrounded the man and cat.
"Uchiha Takeyasu!"
Enma, who had just been about to contact the Sarutobi Clan with a Summoning Jutsu, stepped forward through the crowd. His dark monkey face was troubled, and deep unease and panic welled up inside him. He lowered his voice, but it still held a trace of alarm.
"This is Monkey Mountain, beyond the reach of the mortal world. What are you doing here?"
"Beyond the reach of the mortal world? You think this is one of the Three Great Sage Regions?"
"As for what I'm doing here..."
If his opponent had been a breathtaking beauty, Uchiha Takeyasu would have blurted out, "I came to screw you." But facing a muscular ape, he decided not to waste his breath.
"Disaster comes from the mouth."
"Though you're nothing but a pack of beasts, I, who have studied the Analects of Fist, am still willing to teach you the ways of being human."
"Don't worry about the tuition. It'll cost you no more than your monkey lives."
"The first lesson is benevolence!"
"The character for 'benevolence' is made up of 'person' and 'two.' It means the technique of chopping a person in half."
As he finished speaking, Uchiha Takeyasu calmly drew his katana and cleaved a shaggy, savage-looking ape in two with a single stroke.
"The second lesson is righteousness."
Practicing what he preached as he taught the apes how to be human, Uchiha Takeyasu unleashed his Susanoo. The red skeletal giant's upper body slapped three apes, who had nowhere to dodge, into a pulp with a single blow.
"Righteousness is the strength to hammer someone else's head down into their chest."
"Sorry, I didn't quite control my strength, teacher."
"But I think these great lessons on benevolence and righteousness have already sunk deep into your hearts and souls."
"Your tuition wasn't paid in vain."
Watching Uchiha Takeyasu lecture so eloquently, Enma's dark monkey face flushed with rage, and blood vessels spread across his eyes. With a long howl, he led the elite of the Monkey Clan in a fierce charge.
Then, to their despair, no matter how they attacked or what sacrifices they made, the red skeletal giant continued slaughtering their clan with leisurely ease.
Blood spread. Flesh and bone littered the ground.
When their leader, Enma, was seized in the giant's palm, the remaining apes stared blankly at him as he screamed in midair. Someone let out a terrified cry, and the apes, their courage shattered, scattered and fled.
"Please... spare... them..."
As Susanoo's hand slowly closed, Enma felt as though a python had wound itself tightly around him. His muscles and bones creaked all over as he begged in broken phrases.
"They're... innocent..."
Pfft!
Blood sprayed from Enma's mouth. His tall, powerful body finally slipped from Susanoo's palm like a limp noodle. Uchiha Takeyasu withdrew his calm gaze and dispelled Susanoo.
The remaining stragglers weren't even as strong as Jonin. He only needed to maintain the holographic map in his left eye to avoid ambushes and traps, and to find any apes in hiding. Using anything else would be a waste—like using a sledgehammer to crack a nut.
Monkey Mountain wasn't very large, perhaps five hundred hectares. At Uchiha Takeyasu's pace, he covered the whole area in around thirty minutes. He now considered it his own private land, and every ape there had been killed.
Uchiha Takeyasu stopped and tossed aside his chipped, ruined katana. The killing intent radiating from him was almost tangible. Paired with his scarlet Sharingan, he looked like a ruthless butcher fresh out of hell, killing without batting an eye.
The icy air made Tachibana, nestled in his arms, look frightened. Even the whiskers on her feline face trembled.
Noticing her unease, Uchiha Takeyasu asked softly, "Tachibana, how are you feeling?"
"I'm a little scared, Lord Takeyasu."
Tachibana answered honestly, her eyes shifting as she cautiously watched her master's expression. "Lord Takeyasu just now seemed like he'd gone on a killing spree."
Uchiha Takeyasu's face remained expressionless, making Tachibana shrink her head. A master who wore every emotion on his face and acted completely crazy was a normal master.
One who said nothing at all was terrifying to a cat.
After a long while, Tachibana's heart still pounding, she finally heard Uchiha Takeyasu speak with feeling.
"...I really did go a little overboard."
"That exhilarating feeling of life slipping away in my hands—even when it's just monkeys, I can't get enough of it."
"So, Tachibana, hurry and let me take a sniff to calm down."
Uchiha Takeyasu turned off his Sharingan and gathered the orange cat into his arms. He stroked her smooth, silky fur and lowered his head to take a deep sniff, easing his excited nerves.
(With the Three Tomoe, killing people is like killing chickens. With the Mangekyo, I'm practically an emotionless fishmonger.)
(Once I've killed Senju Tobirama, the biggest obstacle in my way, I'll have to rein myself in. I don't want to become a lunatic who knows nothing but killing.)
(After returning to Konoha and becoming the Third Hokage, it'll be time to cultivate my mind for a while. Or maybe I could find a pretty girl to cuddle with. I'm not getting any younger.)
(Damn it, I crossed over too early. Tsunade should have just graduated from the Ninja Academy this year. She's still a cute little girl.)
(Wait, have I ever met Tsunade's mother?)
For a great demon to lay down his butcher's knife and become a Buddha, the only thing comparable to that state was being brainwashed—or entering Sage Mode after getting some.
Having figured out how to address the root of his bloodlust, Uchiha Takeyasu was in high spirits. He settled Tachibana, who was panting from all his sniffing, in his arms and began to draw on the Chakra within him.
"Earth Style: Earth Core Movement."
Uchiha Takeyasu made the earth rise and fall, adjusting the terrain as he buried all the blood beneath the ground.
In some ways, ninjutsu was incredibly powerful for farming and infrastructure projects.
"Tachibana, this place will become a Paradise for the Uchiha Clan."
Uchiha Takeyasu hadn't decided what to do with the land yet, but that didn't stop him from stamping it with the Uchiha Clan's mark.
At the very least, it could become the Uchiha Clan's last retreat.
That was what Uchiha Takeyasu thought, having long since regarded the Uchiha Clan as his property.
"This will be my Paradise, too."
Tachibana, thoroughly blissed out from Uchiha Takeyasu's sniffing, had a blush on her feline face. It filled Uchiha Takeyasu with unease—even Ninja Cats were starting to look pretty to him. If he didn't find a female companion soon, he figured his tastes would go completely off the rails.
(Could Tachibana turn into a catgirl?)
(Hmm, worth looking forward to.)
"Ahem. Behave yourself, Tachibana. We should get going."
Under Tachibana's gaze—the look she gave a scumbag—man and cat vanished from Paradise.
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