True Self at Ease

Chapter 038: True Self at Ease

"Xue Ding, you almost lost control just now. Your state of mind still needs cultivation. You must not let demonic thoughts invade your spiritual platform. Our Ancestral Master's situation is a clear warning."

After the Quanzhen Sect and the Wang Family left, the Sect Leader Celestial Master admonished Xue Ding.

"Disciple understands," Xue Ding replied softly and respectfully. Just now, under Feng Qi's provocation, he had indeed harbored killing intent and nearly lost control, drawing his sword to strike him. As the senior disciple of the Celestial Master Temple, if he were to actually do such a thing, it would be truly terrible.

But...

"Master, they will come again in three days. At that time, disciple..." Xue Ding hesitated, unsure of what to say or do. Should he draw his sword?

"You don't need to worry about this matter. For you, the most important thing is still suppressing the demonic thoughts."

"Xue Ding, you are the senior disciple of the Celestial Master Temple and a role model for all disciples. If you fall into demonic thoughts, how can we bear it?"

Xue Ding looked up and said solemnly, "Master, please rest assured. Disciple will absolutely not let the Celestial Master Temple become a laughingstock."

"Mm, it's good that you understand."

Watching his master and the other disciples leave, Xue Ding, left alone on the spot, looked at the Celestial Master Sword in his hand again, a look of confusion appearing in his eyes.

He had verbally promised his master that he would restrain his demonic thoughts and rectify himself, but deep down, Xue Ding was very lost.

He hated himself for not being able to draw his sword.

If he could have, by suppressing Feng Qi, the Celestial Master Temple would not be in such a passive situation.

Currently, his Ancestral Master was recuperating due to a previous qi deviation, and outsiders were unaware of this. In three days, when the Quanzhen Sect and the Wang Family returned, how would the Celestial Master Temple resist? Would they really have to cede their mountain gate?

Gazing at the surrounding mountains, Xue Ding suddenly turned around. Instead of returning to the temple, he went to Yuan Tianzong's wooden house once more, alone.

At the same time, in the wooden house.

Yuan Tianzong sat cross-legged under the moonlight, with hundreds of shattered stones floating around him. Each stone was enveloped by true energy, following its own trajectory and rotating around his body.

To simulate the forty-nine thousand white marks in the nameless scripture, he needed to improve his control over true energy, and for this, he immediately threw himself into training.

Geniuses are not frightening.

What is frightening is when geniuses work harder than you and are more persistent on their own path.

And this is Yuan Tianzong, a fool solely pursuing the great path of cultivation.

Suddenly, the suspended shattered stones all landed.

Yuan Tianzong, who had stopped cultivating, looked in the direction of the Celestial Master Temple and waited quietly.

A few minutes later, Xue Ding appeared in his sight.

"Why did you come back?" Yuan Tianzong asked.

Xue Ding stepped forward, raised his hand, and bowed, "Senior Yuan, I lied to you earlier. I have indeed practiced swordsmanship."

Yuan Tianzong did not reply, guessing that the matter was not simple, and waited for Xue Ding to tell him everything.

"Regarding my swordsmanship, there is a huge problem—demonic thoughts."

Demonic thoughts?

Yuan Tianzong nodded. "Continue."

"Demonic thoughts are different from qi deviation. They..."

Yuan Tianzong interrupted, "I understand demonic thoughts better than you. No need to explain. Talk about your swordsmanship."

Hearing this, Xue Ding felt a glimmer of hope. Since Yuan Tianzong understood demonic thoughts, perhaps he could truly offer help, break through the demonic obstacles, and clear the fog.

"Senior Yuan, as soon as I grasp my sword, demonic thoughts escape from my heart. The uncontrollable killing intent is enough to shatter my spirit. This is the root cause."

Yuan Tianzong nodded.

Demonic thoughts and qi deviation are different.

So-called qi deviation is more of true energy rioting within the body, impacting the nerves and meridians, leading to confused thoughts, like a madman.

True energy riots, surging everywhere within the body, causing unbearable pain.

Pain would make those who suffer qi deviation develop a violent heart and want to vent.

This is why the vast majority of people who suffer qi deviation become irritable and bloodthirsty.

Demonic thoughts are different.

When demonic thoughts act up, a person is clear-headed and knows everything they are doing.

If you were to ask what demonic thoughts specifically are, someone in the late Dharma Age once offered an explanation—demonic thoughts are a second personality, a symptom of schizophrenia.

"You must have experienced some extreme stimulus before, haven't you?"

Xue Ding's pupils trembled slightly, as if recalling some past events. After hesitating for a long time, he nodded heavily. Just as he was about to confess, Yuan Tianzong raised his hand and interrupted again.

"There's no need to talk about what kind of stimulus it was."

"Your demonic thoughts arose because of it. It is a part of your psyche and cannot be stripped away."

Xue Ding's heart sank to the bottom of a lake. If even Yuan Tianzong said so, he felt completely hopeless. The hand holding his sword trembled slightly.

Demonic thoughts plagued him; once he gripped a knife, his killing intent would surge uncontrollably, compelling him to murder.

How could he possibly be worthy of the righteous Celestial Master Sword in such a state, let alone serve as the Celestial Master Temple's senior disciple…

"A deformed true self is still a true self. Demonic thoughts are a part of your spirit; you cannot strip them away, nor can you suppress them forever, unless you die."

"Facing yourself directly is the correct approach."

Xue Ding, who had already fallen into despair, looked up sharply upon hearing this: "Senior Yuan, what do you mean by that?"

"Only by facing your true self can you achieve it. What demonic thoughts, what not… the name itself instills fear. You've simply got a bit of a mental issue, a touch of split personality."

"For an ordinary person, seeing a psychologist and taking medication would be enough to manage it well."

"However, in the cultivation world, demonic thoughts might not be entirely a bad thing."

"I've seen this situation in someone else before. He came up with a method and, based on it, created a martial art called the 'Demon Subduing Heart Sutra'."

That person was one of Yuan Tianzong's few friends during the Dharma-ending era, someone who had experienced complex matters since childhood, suffered from a split personality, and was somewhat paranoid.

Xue Ding's face lit up with surprise, and he immediately knelt: "Senior Yuan, I... I..."

"If you want to learn, just say so. I'm a rogue cultivator of the mountains and wilds; I don't have rules about only teaching those who formally become my disciple."

Xue Ding replied forcefully: "Senior Yuan, I want to learn!"

"Mm, the concept of this scripture is actually simple. First, you must accept your deformed true self. Don't bear any psychological burden; your thoughts must be clear and unobstructed."

"In other words, even if everyone calls you a pervert, you must believe you are normal and they are the abnormal ones."

Xue Ding asked doubtfully: "How should I do that?"

"What is the matter that troubles you most in your heart right now?"

Xue Ding immediately recalled Feng Qi's face, a killing intent flashing through him: "I want to kill someone."

"Then go kill him," Yuan Tianzong replied calmly.

The teachings of the Celestial Master Temple since childhood made Xue Ding instinctively resist: "As the senior disciple of the Celestial Master Temple, how can I kill someone arbitrarily without reason?"

"No reason? Then why do you want to kill him?"

Xue Ding thought for a moment and said: "The reason isn't sufficient to outweigh the value of a life."

"He causes you distracting thoughts, clouds your mind, hinders your cultivation, and disrupts your path. Is that not reason enough?" Yuan Tianzong couldn't understand. "Do you know what the first step of cultivating the Demon Subduing Heart Sutra is?"

"What?"

"Let your self out. You must understand that it is your own, not an enemy. You are the one who has pushed it to the opposite side."

Xue Ding was still hesitating.

Yuan Tianzong sighed helplessly: "Xue Ding, the path of cultivation is arduous, like walking in pitch-black darkness. If you doubt yourself, constantly battle your inner demons, fearing you'll choose the wrong direction and fall into an abyss with one misstep, how can you stride forward?"

"You fear that once you start killing, you'll become a demon who slaughters everything."

"When you no longer fear this, you will discover another world."

"If you wholeheartedly strive for good and your will is firm, then whether you save someone or kill someone, it is an act of goodness. Understand?"

"Your true self is at ease, your thoughts are clear and unobstructed. Understand?"