Then What? Go on, Keep Talking

Xiao He came and went like the wind, and reaching the pinnacle of skipping class was certainly not something achieved in a single day. Xiang Yuan could not help but suspect that Wang Wenxu had not noticed at all that someone had entered the classroom, then left again.

So this was not called skipping class. It was outright truancy.

Because they were moving so quickly, the servants were still resting their horses by the roadside when the two of them boarded the carriage and headed straight for the western gate of the county seat.

Inside the carriage, Xiao He was beaming with excitement. He urged the servant several times to drive faster.

He was eager to "pay his respects" to his close friend Xu Jixian, wishing he could appear at the man's bedside in the blink of an eye.

Xiao He explained, "Although the Xu Family's fortunes have declined and its descendants are few, it was once immensely prosperous. One of their ancestors served as the governor of Dezhou, and they even produced a Martial Top Scholar. You could say they were a family of eunuch officials..."

"You mean an official family!" Xiang Yuan could not help correcting him.

"Close enough. Eunuchs are officials too." Xiao He waved his hand casually. It was not important; the meaning was the same.

Eunuchs lacked that particular part, though, so there was a huge difference. They were much older too.

"By the generation of Brother Xu, he was the only male left in the family. He was neither accomplished in literature nor martial arts, and guarded the family ancestral estate without any proper income. He lived entirely on rent—a poor, unfortunate man!"

"Brother Xu's parents died young, so they named him 'Jixian,' hoping he would restore the Xu Family. But look at him. Every day, he goes to the pleasure quarters seeking amusement. I bet the ghost he encountered was an attractive female ghost."

"When I first arrived at the academy, I saw that he was incomparably ugly, which made my own heroic and impressive appearance stand out even more, so I befriended him..."

Xiao He cheerfully mocked his bad friend while telling Xiang Yuan an amusing story.

Xu Jixian was both virtuous and talented, ranking dead last in the academy. During the academy examinations some time ago, he had wanted to seize second-to-last place, so between solving the questions and cheating, he chose sorcery.

"Hahahaha, I nearly laughed myself to death. The old man almost died of anger that day."

"..."

Xiang Yuan rolled his eyes, having already guessed who was ranked second to last.

From Xiao He's words, the two seemed more like a pair of frustrated people who shared the same bad habits and huddled together for warmth. Xu Jixian's family had fallen into decline and could not rise again, while Xiao He's family was full of outstanding talents who did not receive any affection. They were both unfortunates cast adrift in the world, becoming confidants and inviting each other along for company.

It was quite nice. Two foul smells fumigating each other without choking anyone else.

No, they were about to choke him too!

With the servant urging the horses onward, the carriage soon reached the western gate.

The Xu Family had been prosperous two hundred years ago. At that time, East Street had not yet been built in Fengxian County, so their ancestral estate lay to the west of the county seat. It was a large manor with additional fields and land deeds, barely maintaining the bearing of an aristocratic clan.

The outside looked impressive, but the inside was another matter.

The household had only one old servant to attend to their daily needs. Much of the corridor was covered in dust, and weeds grew thickly in the courtyard. Apart from the family temple and ancestral hall, which were swept clean and constantly filled with incense, spiderwebs could be seen everywhere else.

What? This poor fellow could collect rent, so why did he not hire a few more servants?

What kind of question was that? He had spent all his money on his lovers, of course.

"Brother Xu, your elder brother has come to visit you."

Xiao He noisily pushed open the door and entered. Xiang Yuan followed him and saw a young man with unusually striking bones lying on the sickbed.

He had a horse-like face, dark skin, thick lips, coarse eyebrows, protruding ears, and a garlic-shaped nose. Calling him unattractive would not quite do him justice, but he was certainly unique in all the world. Xiang Yuan could not help wondering whether this Brother Xu had hidden himself away when humanity was evolving.

Judging people by appearances was wrong, and calling someone ugly was even more impolite. One could only say that he had retained the dross while discarding the essence, that he had been born with a great deal of personality and did not follow the crowd.

Comparing him with a physiognomy manual, Xiang Yuan was astonished to find that there was no solution to Xu Jixian's face. Or rather, there were too many obvious features, and any interpretation could work.

He was a truly extraordinary man.

With Xu Jixian as his foil, Xiao He looked handsome and dashing, while Xiang Yuan looked refined and clear-featured. The two of them, graceful as jade trees in the breeze, seemed like twin streams of pure water flowing into the room.

Xu Jixian groaned several times on the sickbed. When he saw Xiao He coming to visit him, he tore off the white cloth around his head and sat straight up with a whoosh. "Brother Xiao, what brings you here? You did not go to the academy again today?"

He was tall, broad, and quite robust. His face looked mature enough that he could easily pass for thirty.

"How could that be? Your elder brother is no idle wastrel!"

Xiao He looked disdainful, then said in disappointment, "I heard you encountered a ghost last night and had your yang essence stolen by a female ghost, leaving your vital energy utterly drained and barely clinging to life. How come you do not look sick at all?"

"Then again, I cannot say you have no problems. That female ghost really was ruthless. She beat Brother Xu into this state. Just look at you—she ruined your face."

"Brother Xiao, stop fooling around. The female ghost did not hit me. She was very gentle. I have always looked like this."

Xu Jixian did not get angry after being mocked twice. Instead, he looked curiously at Xiang Yuan. "Who is this brother? Why is he carrying a saber? Did you hire a servant?"

"He is not a servant. Brother Xiaoyuan is a new friend I just made. Like you and me, he is an unfortunate man. He is temporarily staying at Xiao Residence, and since he felt embarrassed eating and drinking for free, he protects me in return." Xiao He explained.

"So this is Brother Xiaoyuan. Forgive my disrespect." Xu Jixian rose and apologized, then had the old servant bring tea.

"Brother Xu, the pleasure is mine."

Xiang Yuan accepted the tea with a cupped-fist salute. In just a few words, he categorized Xu Jixian as a doubi: not bad at heart, but incapable of being serious. No wonder he and Xiao He got along so well.

Flies were always attracted to other flies.

The three of them sat down, and Xiao He could not wait any longer. "Quick, tell me! Which pleasure house did you encounter the ghost in last night? Jade Sheng House, Red Sleeve Pavilion, or Emerald Cloud Tower?"

"None of them. Your elder brother is not some frivolous lecher!"

Xu Jixian first defended himself with a booming voice, then continued, "Last night, I came home from Emerald Cloud Tower after having a little wine. I do not know which alley I walked into. A cold wind blew, my legs began to wobble, and in my drunken haze I saw a woman in white sitting beside a wall..."

"She said her husband's family name was Wang and that she was a widow, so I called her Widow Wang."

"Widow Wang had a difficult life. She had sprained her ankle walking at night, and her lantern had broken. She had fallen by the roadside, but no one had extended a helping hand."

"Seeing her dressed in mourning—no, seeing how pitiful she was, I felt compassion and helped her home so she could rest properly. There was no harm in waiting until dawn, when her foot would hurt less, before she left."

"All I was thinking at the time was that my house was nearby. I was simply being kind. I had no other intentions."

At this point, Xu Jixian sighed mournfully, lamenting that good people received no good reward and regretting that he had helped someone in need the previous night.

"And then? Go on, keep talking!" Xiao He was frantic. This was not the time for "find out what happens next time."

"There is not much to say. Widow Wang saw that I was kindhearted and insisted on repaying me. Brother Xiao, you know me. I am upright, never take advantage of others in their distress, and certainly never use a favor to demand repayment..."

"I do not want to hear this!"

Xiao He flew into a rage, and Xiang Yuan's eyes widened as well.

"Then there is even less to say. I upheld propriety and refused her repeatedly, but she looked as though she intended to defile me. I am timid, and when I became nervous, I forgot to resist."

Xu Jixian looked remorseful. Sensing the disdainful gazes of the two men opposite him, his dark face flushed red, and blue veins sprang up across his forehead. "Do not disbelieve me. I swear I struggled at the time."

"On the bed?"

"In my heart."

"..." x2

"It was also because I am too kindhearted. I was afraid rejecting her would hurt her feelings. She was already so pitiful, and besides, I deeply regret it now..."

Xu Jixian pounded his chest and stamped his feet, saying that because he had carelessly stumbled into helping the female ghost, he now could not drive her away.

"What do you mean, you cannot drive her away?" Xiao He's eyes lit up.

"Last night, Widow Wang and I shared several bouts of passion. Although she had not studied for many years, whenever she opened her mouth, she made people feel very comfortable... You two brothers, do not glare at me. I mean that Widow Wang was cultured and reasonable, and it was very pleasant to listen to her speak."

Xu Jixian had most likely been bewitched by the female ghost. Although he knew she was a ghost, he still could not help making excuses for her, calling her pure and unaffected, unlike the coquettish temptresses described in books.

After speaking, he sensed that something was wrong and hurriedly defended himself. "At first, I truly did pity her. Who would have thought... Sigh, I alone am to blame. I made the decision with a slap to my forehead, then realized my mistake with a slap to my thigh."

"I slapped the table and laughed myself to death." Xiao He looked utterly disdainful.

Were the two of them performing crosstalk here?!

Xiang Yuan rolled his eyes and interrupted Xu Jixian's desperate attempt to clear his name. "Brother Xu, get to the point. Why did the female ghost refuse to leave?"

"After we were intimate, Widow Wang revealed her true form. Her long hair drifted in the air, her white clothes were like mist, and her body was as cold as ice. Only then did I realize she was not human."

Xu Jixian's face was filled with lingering fear. "She said my life was in her hands, so she stopped hiding it. She also said that during the day she lived beneath the old well in my backyard, and told me to seek her out at night. If I did not go, she would come find me. She was not afraid I would run away."

"How many years of cultivation does this female ghost have to be so arrogant?" Xiao He wore a resentful expression, as if asking why he had never encountered Widow Wang despite being so handsome.

"Ooh, her tendons were loose, her waist was soft, and she could twist and turn. Her cultivation was profound." Xu Jixian poured oil on the fire, constantly provoking Xiao He.

You simply could not sleep, while I slept just fine. That will teach you.

"Infuriating!"

Xiang Yuan: (_)

In this world, there were all kinds of people. Some people were responsible for all kinds, like him. Others were responsible for all kinds of lewdness, like Xiao He and Xu Jixian.