Zugabe: Army of Two
Foreword:
I will go against my nature and defy my instincts to love you forever.
--Richard Dawkins | The Selfish Gene
[Part 1: Rap Battle]
In the neglected shallows of North Bay No. 2, a small boat no more than three meters long carries two lonely and unfortunate souls who share the same fate, to once again realize their wicked dreams.
Mr. Parker. Sirius Parker, draped in a protective plastic sheet, felt his holy blood gradually boiling at sunrise. Without Patriarch Gloria, he was no longer the beloved steward, and Dionysus no longer protected him.
As a pure-blooded Homo sapiens, Man Yin Carter was not afraid of the sun. He took good care of his companions and took the initiative to pick up a paddleboard and start rowing vigorously.
"Fate is fickle, Mr. Parker," sighed the manager of the Tequila Hotel.
Unexpectedly, the two masters, who fought each other in life, ended up having to rely on each other for survival after their deaths.
"Who the hell can I complain to?" Sirius, who had lived in East Horse Port with Gloria for over twenty years, spoke with a thick Southeast Asian accent, "I just glanced at the flower garden and fainted—when I woke up, there was nothing there!"
Man Yin added, "Yes, that's why fate is so fickle, Mr. Parker."
The small boat was getting further and further away from the reef area of the North Second Bay. The two of them had to go upstream to the northwest to another port city to borrow a boat to go out to sea—back to the Shambhala Islands, back to their hometown to find another way out.
"This isn't right! This isn't right!!" Sirius Parker was still unconvinced.
Man Yin advised, "Evil will always be defeated by justice."
Sirius: "Who's evil?! We just lost! We were never bad!"
Man Yin: "Really?"
Sirius recalled Lady Gloria's teachings; that twisted logic of "the winner takes all, the loser is nothing" seemed untenable.
"Well"
He was speechless for a moment, unsure how to answer. After a while, he finally managed to utter a sentence.
"This won't do! It seems to lack a sense of ritual!"
Man Yin: "Please speak."
Sirius Parker described it in a serious tone.
"At least let me fight the enemy for a few rounds! Then I'll flee in defeat! That way I can make up some stories and fabricate some plots with my fellow villagers. Otherwise, how will I get the next round of start-up capital?"
"Is there a difference?" Man Yin didn't understand. "It's all about losing."
Sirius slapped the boat's first mate, responding with agitation and anger.
"Of course there's a difference! The difference between losing willingly and being defeated involuntarily is huge! One is accepting defeat willingly and honorably, swallowing the bitter pill of inferior skill; the other is..."
"Damn it! I woke up without any explanation and everything was gone!"
Man Yin smiled faintly.
--His smile had a hint of sarcasm, but he quickly suppressed those emotions.
Because Sirius Parker is a genuine cannibalistic monster under Gloria's command, while Man Yin Carter is merely a mortal who has signed a devil's pact.
I am at their mercy, like a fish on the chopping block; how dare Man Yin disobey Sirius's will?
"You're right, you're absolutely right!"
Right now, at this very moment--
Two ordinary people who were lying in wait at the Tequila Sunrise Hotel suddenly emerged from underwater.
Captain Quack and Ethan Mate Ethan were quick and agile, grabbing the oars and climbing onto the small boat in the blink of an eye.
With the added burden of two more people, the little boat of friendship maintains a delicate balance, teetering on the brink of capsizing at any moment.
"You blind bastards!" Sirius was about to explode, just looking for a suitable target to vent his anger on. These two arrogant flies, oblivious to the danger, had followed him here like ghosts. He'd cut off their heads and use them as material for his startup presentation; he'd definitely make a lot of money that way.
Ethan reacted quickly, grabbing the stern and pressing and shaking Mr. Sirius. The plastic sheet nearly slipped off Mr. Sirius's unsteady body, and the moment his skin touched the scorching sun, he howled in pain, his eyes becoming clear.
They simply cannot fight in this environment.
Even if they walked from bow to stern, the ship would capsize. He and Man Yin never be able to return to East Malaysia; they would only become fish food.
Man Yin shouted, "Where did you two lowly bastards get the guts to board Lord Sirius's ship?"
"Because I heard it!" Ethan shouted.
Captain Quack's expression was serious, his eyes wide with anger. "I heard it too!"
Ethan: "Two stray dogs, broken-backed jackals, are licking each other's wounds."
In order to subdue Sirius, the Blood-giving Monster, Quack took out a lute from his waterproof backpack and began to strum the strings rapidly.
"Hoooooo!~"
The strange spiritual pressure immediately took control of everyone present. Man Yin Carter dropped his paddleboard and was unable to move under the control of this demonic spiritual sound, only able to sing along with the string music.
Don't be fooled by their sweet talk!
"The evil magic of the hybrid monster! It's not worth much!"
As a powerful singer in the Church of Dionysus choir, Sirius immediately stepped forward, determined to defeat Quack's strange spiritual power head-on with the most ruthless lyrics, to proclaim his ideals, and to spread his story.
"My dad disciplined me with corporal punishment from a young age, teaching me to get ahead by any means necessary."
"It has had fourteen or fifteen different masters, but few of them have amounted to anything."
"I have also read the story of the knight and Sancho Panza, and I can bear this sentiment."
"But after killing all these useless people and signing the inheritance transfer certificate..."
"To shed insincere tears at a grave is what it means to be compassionate and righteous."
"I married for love and studied abroad, but after reading so many books, I suddenly realized that I need to find a reputable evil leader to rely on!"
"You traitor! You shameless scoundrel!" Ethan's deep voice broke the silence. "Do you know how many sins you've committed?!"
"The radiance of Dionysus! The devil of the Netherworld!" Man Yin chimed in with a high-pitched "High C": "I have never acted with a guilty conscience!"
"Stop spouting your Japanese nonsense! What are you talking about, civilization and order!" Sirius followed up with the second paragraph. "People who grew up drinking cola and eating steak dare to lecture their poor Western brothers?"
"I'd like to ask you, and you too! I'd like to ask Heaven and Earth!"
"I was born here, I grew up here, am I destined to die here?!"
"The first step of the plan has been completed." Man Yin immediately followed Mr. Sirius's rapid-fire output. "There's a second step, a third step."
"You're going to send me to school? So I can study hard?"
"No, no, no, no, only a fool would think that you have to work hard to achieve something!"
"Leave the lessons, education, and admonitions to the common folk! I'm already tired of hearing about Old Wood's '[Yo-ho-ho-ho]'!"
"Magic, magic, demonic power, damn it! I only believe Hope's four-word mantra—[Ah, right, right]!"
Mr. Sirius sang loudly. "The glory of Dionysus! ~~The devil of Netherworld! ~~"
"No one understands, Master is merciful," Man Yin replied.
Sirius: "All things return to one! ~ No regrets! ~"
"Even a dead duck's beak is still tough." Man Yin inadvertently sang out her true feelings. "That's what makes it so intimidating."
Captain Quack was immediately shocked. He was stunned by the impromptu performance of these two cult henchmen and kept giving Ethan meaningful glances.
In this rap battle, Captain Frogman had no chance of winning; his style was completely outclassed by these two weirdos.
Quack: "My palms and soles are covered in cold sweat, Ethan? I suddenly feel very scared."
Ethan exclaimed in surprise, "My God, Captain, you look like a big old woman. Is this the Quack I know?"
Quack's hands trembled slightly as he strummed the strings. "This jinx and the cursed nail's tone is absolutely explosive. He has bel canto singing skills—a world-class tenor from C3 to C6. I only have a 13-centimeter rotten tongue and a broken guitar."
"You're going to lose face too? I can't let you lose face like this!" Ethan said with a grim face. "The brothers and sisters on the Nostalgia are waiting for our triumphant return. Ming De is watching you. How can you fall on the eve of victory? If you keep backing down, I'll film it and send it to your ex-wife!"
"Summon your courage! ~Quack Hussein (Captain Quack's father's real name)!" Quack mustered all his strength to compete with the Blood-giving Monster in singing ability.
Ethan timely helped the captain, whose will was on the verge of collapse.
"--Demon slayer, invincible hero!~"
Quack felt a burst of scalding heat from his throat and tongue, then suddenly relaxed, and his pharyngeal voice soared straight to the top of his head.
"Exquisite martial arts! ~Knightly combat skills!~"
Ethan replied, "And the War King's Pankrasin!~~~"
Upon hearing these names, Sirius turned deathly pale, Quack the increasingly intense croaking made him unable to move.
"Go ahead and make your move! Shout all you want! You incompetent, shameless heretics!"
Captain Quack's voice was hoarse with anger, and his words were violent.
"A master who bullies the weak and fears the strong is dead! This dog of a servant still dares to dream of escaping?"
"This tropical storm destroyed the Nostalgia cruise ship, but it cannot destroy human pride!"
"Don't be impatient! ~Wild Wolf, cocking its gun, lets out a top-notch voice!"
"General of Tears, I'll tear your intestines out and use them as a noose, then shoot you dead!"
"Can you enjoy wealth and luxury forever while sucking the blood of the poor?"
"A nightmare woke you up in the middle of the night!?"
"Who's knocking on your window and banging on your door? Don't believe a word of nonsense!?"
"Cult Leader, get off the bed right now and open your dog eyes wide!"
"Your worker Grandfather are everywhere inside and outside the church!"
Ethan banged his maracas on the deck. "It's too noisy!"
Who decides how anyone lives? Who wrote these cruel rules?
How can this horrific cycle of cannibalism finally end?
"Your master knows how to answer! Cowards just pretend to be stupid!"
Quack croaking was aggressive and pointed at Man Yin Carter.
"Then let the Sexy Bomb take his mom and blow him up! Blow up one of your Horcruxes--"
Ethan: "Two, three, thousands upon thousands!"
Quack: "The wicked banshee Lamastu is also blown to bits!"
Ethan: "She won't get away with it either!"
"Ming De virtuous! ~ Acting on behalf of Heaven! ~~" Ethan gripped Quack's hand tightly, but Quack shook him off with his intense playing.
"Nameless hero! Shout out!"
"Your entire family will not live!!!"
The lute and maracas unleashed astonishing Inspiration Pressure, and the combined power of the two nearly paralyzed the Blood-giving Monster and the devil's cultist.
Ethan: "Inciting men to use drugs?"
Quack: "Kill him!"
Ethan: "Forcing women into prostitution?"
Quack: "Kill him!"
Ethan: "Things that break the hearts of the elderly and bring tears to the eyes of children."
Quack: "Bang! Bang! Kill! All!!"
Ethan: "You want to wager a duel!?"
Quack: "Shouldn't we at least be fair?!"
Ethan: "Pushing innocent people into a life-or-death gamble, causing bloodshed and tears!"
Quack: "All he does is hide in the audience and eat human flesh, a drunken gold-digging fan!"
"You! And you!" Ethan pointed at them one by one. "You two vermin! You lackeys of the local tyrant, keep dreaming!"
"The Vita Imprint of the Madness Butterfly can turn insects into dragons?" Quack replied, "If I were Judas, I'd blush with embarrassment upon hearing that!"
Ethan: "You drank the holy blood and turned into a monster, and you still have the nerve to be so smug?"
Quack: "You little brat, you dare call yourself Wings of Light?"
The astonishing croaking of frogs caused blood to flow from the Blood-giving Monster's ears, and Man Yin's eyes rolled back, nearly causing him to faint.
"Monster, take this! Eat my Berloberg White God Sword Qi!"
Captain Quack seized the opportunity, ripping off the plastic sheet covering Sirius Parker's head. The sunlight instantly burned away the monster's eyes, and before it could even scream, the overwhelming, Duo Hun sound rendered it unable to react, completely robbing it of its will to fight. It quickly turned into ashes.
On the other side, Ethan, mustering his courage, snatched the paddleboard and slapped Man Yin Carter hard on the head—
--Man Yin had signed a life contract with Fret Caesar, and he possessed a superpower of soul power that would not die even if his body were torn to pieces.
But this time, even his shattered body couldn't save his life.
His head flew out without any obstruction, like being hit by a powerful paddleboard in the air, soaring more than twenty meters into the sky.
The low-flying pelican widened its eyes, snatched the takeout food's hair in its beak, and flew further and further away.
Man Yin Carter first regained consciousness, then struggled desperately, his body and mind acting independently. Finally, with a kick of his legs, seemingly exceeding the limits of his Soul Power's range, foul-smelling urine flowed from his trouser legs, and he vomited a torrent of crimson blood, like a hot spring, from his throat and neck.
--They're dead!
[Part ②: We are going around in circles with the sun]
On the other side of East Horse Port --
--At the mouth of the underground watercourse, at the end of this fairy tale.
Flavia wanted to get her candy back, so she followed the General of Tears's directions and led Duran all the way to the entrance of the Fjord Cave.
The shipping containers still lie there; they are her national treasury, an important treasure of the Fairy Tale Kingdom.
The happiness of finding what she had lost made her jump for joy, and she cupped Duran's face in her hands, kissing him repeatedly.
"--It's back! It's back! Duran! It's back!"
"Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!"
Just like the evil thoughts in the Black Serpent's heart, they returned to her heart once again, only this time she accepted them and embraced them.
Duran remained calm. "Let's check if there's anything wrong with the goods first."
Flavia started running, nearly falling as she crossed the mudflats and rocks.
Duran's heart leaped into his throat, then he saw the stumbling little black snake regain its balance, naturally start running, stand up straight, and run incredibly fast.
She first clasped her hands together before the remains of the blood-giver, hoping that the Goddess Aio would take away Gloria's wicked soul as soon as possible. Then, she bypassed the bloody mess of broken bones and rummaged through the box lid, carefully examining the outer packaging of the chocolates.
Her beloved magic props were her livelihood and the key to her happiness.
"Very good! Extremely good!"
Flavia screamed in terror--
"--Everything is perfectly fine! No melting or coming unglued! The packaging was all very secure!"
Duran followed him in and saw the torn and scattered packaging bags in the comic book.
"A few bags are missing? Are there rats on the ship?"
Flavia quickly explained, "No! These are cat paw prints! The BOSS ate them!"
"How are we going to transport it?" Flavia suddenly scratched her head with a bitter face. "Over four thousand five hundred kilograms! Add the comic books, and it'll be at least five tons—our combined soul power isn't enough!"
Duran said, "Are you General of Tears?"
Flavia replied, "He's not enough either! His spirit, plus Mr. Wood's spirit, can't carry such heavy crates."
How to take the candy away became a big problem, but someone quickly came to solve it.
Outside the cave, the Vice Minister of War led the way, barging in with his sword at his side.
"Outrageous! You audacious madman! How dare you attack and murder the Patriarch of the Church of Dionysus!"
Following closely behind were more than forty arquebuses, along with the governor and numerous soldiers. They surrounded the cave completely, waiting for the governor's order to arrest people and seize the stolen goods.
The small boat on the beach swayed precariously, gradually approaching the shore.
Captain Quack rushed over with his lute in his arms. Not content with just winning an MVP award, he was preparing for a second concert.
"I understand the process! I understand the process!"
This hybrid monster squeezed past the Vice Minister of War and approached the chubby governor, preparing to clear his throat and begin to sing.
"Oh!~~~ Hooooooo!~"
Flavia was suddenly possessed by evil thoughts and snatched away Quack's harp.
She was breathing heavily, her face flushed.
It wasn't the inner black snake that made her lose her mind, nor was it the embarrassment brought about by her strange singing style.
Rather, she didn't want to use psychic powers to solve the problem, and she didn't want to simply cheat.
She finally restrained her destructive urges and held the lute in her arms.
Captain Quack covered his head, nervously opening a crack between his frog paws, as if he had already foreseen the fate of the last harp.
"I don't want to."
Flavia burst into tears; she was almost a sobbing mess.
I don't want this to happen.
I don't want this to happen.
"Duran, I don't want this."
"This is me, and that is me too!"
She was nearly delirious, spouting incoherent nonsense and muttering incoherent poetry.
"We're going around in circles around the sun! Going around and around! I feel so warm!"
I will love you forever! I love you! Forever and ever!
"Ars Claudia Duran! Duran!"
She hugged the violin case tightly, embracing the instrument that brought her joy and courage.
Beyond the mudflats, tens of thousands of people from East Horse Port stood along the entire length of the beach, some even standing directly in the sea, their trousers rolled up and holding their children, all gazing towards the end of the fjord.
Among those who had eaten Flavia's candy to varying degrees, those who suffered during the Flash Butterfly infestation, those who were pulled from the ruins by the feathered serpent in the midst of hail, rain, and snow disasters, and those who witnessed giants smashing up homes and taking lives, a White Snake goddess dressed in a magnificent black dress flew in to fight against this terrifying monster.
"Teach me," the governor whispered to Ethan.
Ethan asked, puzzled, "Teach what?"
Governor: "So it turns out I...!"
Ethan suddenly realized. "Oh! Oh! Oh! Inhale! Inhale! Your Excellency! You need to use your cardiopulmonary function, bring out the advantages of your baritone voice! Don't be shy! Don't feel embarrassed! Release your soul!"
The Vice Minister of War tried to interject, "Your Excellency, this is..."
The governor's voice was loud and clear as he sang his heart out with the two "immortals".
"So it turns out I... had already..."
"--I love it!"
Singing, singing and laughter.
Cries, screams, and hysterical shouts.
Drifting back and forth, this city has so many people, so many people. They all become the surging waves of the crowd, the heartbroken people in this place of sorrow, the prisoners of chocolate.
He seemed to have gone mad, drunk, and was lost in the sound of the rising and falling waves.
Wait a moment! Let me personally deliver this glass of wine to you.
--To your brilliant life.
Kapitel.01 SOS - Need Rescue
Kapitel.02 Abandon
Ende.01 Mother Gaia
Ende.∞ Bloodstone
--From Lingyun Band
Kapitel.03 Keep the Flame·Continue the fire
Kapitel.04 Ordinary Man
--Oz Osborne
Kapitel.05 Iron Man
Kapitel.06 Dear Father
--From the band Black Sabbath
Kapitel.07 Dream On: Wishful Thinking
Kapitel.08 Hide In The Rainbow
--Ronnie James Dior
Kapitel.0⑨ Angel·Angel
Kapitel.10 Painkiller: The Terrifying Killer
--From the Band of Saint Judas
Ende.09 Through The Rain
Ende.08 Heartbreak Station
--From the Cinderella Band
Ende.07 All Out Of Luck
Ende.06 One Of These Days
--From the band White Snake
Ende.05 Talk Dirty To Me: Let Me Scold You
Ende.04 Ride The Wind
--From the band Poison
Ende.03 Strutter - A Person Who Walks with His Head Held High
Ende.02 Kissin' Time
--From the band Kiss
Zugabe① Dear God
-- David Tao | Soul Power Concert
Zugabe② Day Becomes Night
--From Two Steps From Hell
Zugabe③ Army Of Two: An Army of Two Girls
--From <Carol and Tuesday> by Nai Br. XX and Celeina Ann
Original Author: Fox Man
[Abyss Special Train]
[Chapter of Honey]
[The poisonous bee sips the sweetness from the flower, buzzing its thanks as it leaves.]
But the red butterfly believed that the flower should be the one to thank.
[To be continued]