People Arrive

Li Fan found a seat in the corner of the main hall and sat down. First, he poured himself a bowl of Thunder Wine. The liquor was slightly cloudy, with a few yellowish dregs floating in it. It smelled pretty strong, and looked like a kind of strong sorghum liquor. It was indeed quite different from the wine here at Ink Bamboo Mountain.

He took a small sip. It was fiery and sharp on his tongue, making his mouth go numb as if he'd been struck by lightning. His tongue brushed over it, and he found it thick and bitter. When he swallowed, a rush of fire surged up from his throat, choking him so badly that his nose nearly started running.

'Li Fan's mood increased by 1 point.'

Wait, the system gave points for something this awful? Kun, you try some.

Li Fan grabbed Kun and poured the rest of the wine in the bowl down its throat.

Kun's eyes bulged. It slapped its fins and spat the wine out with a string of "ptooey, ptooey, ptooey!"

See? Even Kun thinks it tastes bad.

Then Li Fan leaned over and peered into the wine jar. Inside, he saw a three-inch-long shard, sharp-edged and gleaming silver, thin as a cicada's wing. It looked like the broken blade of some treasured sword, or perhaps a lone swan's feather—like a silver fish, like a bamboo leaf—as it swam slowly through the wine.

The Profound Heaven Sword Intent seemed truly drunk, delighting in its freedom as it swam through this tiny space, through wine as murky as the Human Dao.

Perhaps it was thinking about how a peerless sword immortal, blessed with the highest talent and a lucid sword heart, had ended up in such a state: their sect destroyed, their sword shattered, their body lost, and forced to rely on another. Or perhaps it had forgotten everything—the great Dao of Heaven and Earth, the legacy of its sect, old grievances and grudges.

Maybe it was simply reminiscing—about a young man galloping beneath the sunset all those years ago, about the vanished youth of the swordsman who had traveled the world with a sword in hand.

Wine didn't have to get you drunk. Sometimes, you got drunk all by yourself...

Li Fan drew back and left the Profound Heaven Sword Intent alone to enjoy its little wine bath.

He was beginning to appreciate just how important mental health was, especially for antisocial, mentally unstable sword immortals like these. Spending a month's salary to raise the Profound Heaven Sword Intent's mood by one point wasn't a bad deal.

He felt the half-string of coins Xuanbao had given him in his pocket. Then he beckoned to the waiter and ordered another bowl of rice wine and a dish of peanuts. He chewed as he casually tossed peanuts for Kun to chase, then used the Red Vein Child's method to sharpen his eyesight and watch the travelers coming and going through the inn.

Some were merchants, some martial artists, some Qi cultivators, and some ordinary folk. Some were from the Central Plains, others from beyond its borders. They came in all shapes and sizes, but they all had one thing in common: they were people.

People.

What exactly was a person? Did the "objectified" Profound Heaven Sword Intent still count as a person? Did Fairy Wangshu, who had become a "Non-Thing," still count as one? And did Li Fan, who had crossed over into this body, still count as human? How far did one have to change before becoming "inhuman"?

Li Fan didn't understand such abstruse questions, nor had he ever given them much thought. In his previous life, he'd hardly engaged in any deep philosophical reflection. The only thing he'd ever really agreed with was something Professor Ji Xianlin had said.

So the question of what was and wasn't human only flickered through his mind before vanishing almost immediately. His attention was drawn back to the things he found much more interesting.

"I'd like two rooms. Cut us some mutton and bring two plates of naan. No liquor, but do you have Eight Treasures tea?"

Before Li Fan saw her, he heard her voice. He looked toward it and saw a foreign girl in a yellow jacket and felt hat. A leather harness was strapped around her, a feather stuck in her hat, and a long braid hung over her shoulder. A golden saber was fastened at her waist. Two guards in white clothes and wrapped headscarves followed behind her as she spoke with the innkeeper in the Central Plains tongue, her accent slightly rolling.

"We don't have Eight Treasures tea, but we do have barley tea," the innkeeper replied. He was a well-traveled man, and could tell roughly where she was from just by looking at her clothes.

"Then bring two pots. You two go put our luggage away first, then come down to eat."

The girl took out several Blood Coins to pay. As she gave her attendants their instructions, she turned around and untied the blue gauze veil she'd been wearing to keep out dust.

It was like a songbird calling beyond a gauze-curtained window, each note tinged with sorrow for spring's end. Her bright eyes and pearly teeth shone white as snow. Her gaze was clear and tender as stars on a frosty night. Graceful as clouds at sunset, her beauty outshone spring, dazzling beyond compare. Even the proud look in her eyes made her all the more captivating.

Li Fan's eyes nearly bulged out like Kun's.

'Li Fan's mood increased by 1 point.'

Oh my, now this was the real deal! Li Fan's gaze swept over her and, in the interest of fairness, gave her an 85. Let's review: the girl had a high nose and deep-set eyes, and her bones were more prominent than those of Central Plains girls her age. She was clearly mixed-race. Her figure was still a little slender and hadn't filled out yet. Calling her a beauty right now was a bit much; she was just a young girl with a lovely, spirited look. She'd probably need a few more years to reach her peak. But as long as she didn't grow up awkwardly, she'd score at least a 95.

What? He should rate Fuling and Fairy Wangshu too?

Well... to be honest, Fuling could get no higher than 78 without makeup. With some dressing up, a little squeezing here and padding there, she might just make it to 90.

Real Person Wanshu had a score above 80, and her long legs added another five points. Unfortunately, when she transformed, her score could drop straight into the negatives...

No helping it. Teacher Li Fan had very strict standards!

Ahem, ahem! Just kidding, just kidding. Li Fan was simply appreciating beauty. For the record, he absolutely had no intention of objectifying women in some lecherous way.

So, having looked, he moved on. Li Fan had only been admiring the view; he had no plans to go hit on her. He took out a Scarlet Fruit, split it in half, and munched on his share while Kun ate the other.

But today might really have been Li Fan's lucky day. He hadn't even finished half the Scarlet Fruit when another commotion broke out at the inn's entrance.

He turned to look and saw two men and a woman rush into the inn, nearly crashing into the merchant caravan at the front of the line. The merchants were about to complain, but one of the men had been badly injured. His waist bandage was stained with blood, and the wound had split open. The man and woman supporting him had red eyes and carried a saber and a sword. They looked like they knew martial arts and weren't to be trifled with, so the merchants sensibly stepped aside to let them through.

"Shopkeeper! One room! Wound medicine and blood-replenishing pills! And bring us a basin of hot water!"

The woman's face was pale, and she was completely panicked. It was the man with a massive saber strapped to his back, half-supporting the wounded man, who spoke.

"Honored martial artists, this humble inn is only a small business. Wouldn't it be better to take your friend to a clinic?" the innkeeper asked, bracing himself as he tried to persuade them.

"What did you say?" The saber-wielding man glared, spread his arms, and puffed out his massive chest, looking ready to lay into him.

Instead, the injured man forced a smile. "Fifth Brother, don't worry. I've got a strong constitution. Shopkeeper, I fell off my horse and scraped myself up. It's nothing serious. Just give me a place in the stable to rest, and please bring me a jar of good wine to help me recover. Xuan Niang, Xuan Niang! Pay him!"

"Ah, yes. Fourth Young Master, how are you feeling? Are you sure it's nothing serious?"

Only when she heard her name did Xuan Niang come back to her senses. In her panic, she actually produced a piece of Horseshoe Gold the size of her palm.

The innkeeper's eyes widened. He immediately cupped his hands and said, "You're too kind, honored martial artist. Anyone who travels from afar is a guest. How could I let you stay in the stable? This way, please, I'll show you to a superior room. Waiter, bring the wine!"

Perhaps little scenes like this weren't unusual in a place like the Dragon Gate Inn. Still, plenty of people in the inn—including Li Fan—couldn't help rolling their eyes as the three followed the innkeeper.

Of course, most of them were looking at the young woman called Xuan Niang, though it was also possible someone was admiring Fifth Brother's massive chest. Ahem...

Strictly speaking, Xuan Niang wasn't much prettier than the mixed-race girl who'd just arrived. Li Fan would give her about 80. She had a classical oval face, balanced features, and a dignified appearance. Her hair was styled in a youthful updo, with arched brows and pale, smooth skin. And at that moment, as she worried about Fourth Young Master, her eyes were full of distress. She bit her cherry-red lip, her expression so sorrowful that it stirred sympathy. Depending on the viewer, that could earn her a few extra points.

But what was impressive was her figure.

It was really impressive. Even though she was wrapped up tightly and showed no skin, she was a martial artist, after all, dressed in a tight-fitting training outfit. With no long skirt to conceal her, her tall figure stood out clearly: slender waist, long legs, and graceful curves. She had the perfect proportions of a nine-headed supermodel. Even the way she walked looked like a goddess gliding by, trailing the scent of sweat and fragrance, making everyone's necks turn after her.

Her appeal lay in her mature beauty, and in the full, alluring softness of a newlywed woman, like a flower just about to bloom. And the weight she carried was all in the right places, distributed just so, without a hint of excess.

'Li Fan's mood increased by a full 1 point.'

Kun patted him.

'Kun says to toss it some more peanuts.'

Oh, you're such a pain! Go on, eat, eat!

Li Fan tossed it the whole plate and sent Kun off to chase the peanuts by itself. When he turned to look again, Xuan Niang had already followed the so-called Fourth Young Master and Fifth Brother upstairs to a private room.

What a shame... But that catlike walk up the stairs, those hips—tch, that figure was easily worth another ten points...

Ahem, ahem! Don't get the wrong idea! Li Fan wasn't sharpening his eyesight to look at a married woman's figure! He was purely trying to gauge the strength of these martial artists. After all, Xuan Niang had wrapped her body up so tightly, and she'd just taken the Horseshoe Gold from a Storage Jade pendant. That was why he'd been staring three inches below her navel, trying to figure out what level of Qi cultivation she had...

Of course, you couldn't tell just by looking. You had to touch... Ahem, ahem! Just think about it, that was all...

He drank some more rice wine and savored the aftertaste. Just when he was enjoying himself, another commotion rose at the inn's entrance.

Hm? What beauty is it this time? Let this Daoist take a look!

Li Fan immediately turned around with excitement, only to see a man with skin fairer than snow, rouged cheeks, painted brows, and eyes that darted alluringly... a man!

"Pfft—! Cough, cough, cough!" Li Fan nearly choked to death.

"Hm? Hmph!" The "man" in makeup swept his gaze across the hall. The diners fell silent and lowered their heads, not daring to meet his eyes. He didn't pay them much attention, slapped a hand on the counter, and shrilled, "Innkeeper! I want a room!"

"Coming, coming! Sorry to keep you waiting, sir." The innkeeper hurried out from the back. He saw the "man," then the eight bodyguards behind him, standing still with their heads bowed like wolves or dogs, their faces hidden under bamboo hats and their shoulders draped in cloaks. He immediately recognized where the visitor was from. "Eunuch, how may I serve you..."

The eunuch gave his order without a trace of politeness. "Clear out the second floor! I'm taking all the superior rooms!"

"Ah, but..." The innkeeper glanced at the eunuch, saw his glare, and immediately bent over. "Yes, yes! I'll clear it out right away! Please wait, Your Excellency. Waiter! Bring the finest tea! And the finest wine!" Then he hurried upstairs.

The waiter also bowed and apologized as he went to speak with the diners in the main hall. Those merchants had just been made to wait by the two men and the woman, and now, before they'd even settled in, they had to change tables. They were having a rough day.

But people who made their living on the road didn't want to cause this sort of trouble, so they willingly gave up their seats, making space for the eunuch and his guards to eat and drink.

Coughing, Li Fan also took the opportunity to study the group, simply because they were something new.

There was nothing to say about the guards. Every one of them was broad and burly, wearing close-fitting martial uniforms under their cloaks. Their sleeves revealed chain mail, and their knuckles were thick and callused. They were clearly professional soldiers, and might well have been experts in the military's Body Domination Technique.

The eunuch wasn't simple either. A string of Storage Jades hung at his waist. Perhaps because he'd been traveling, wisps of white vapor rose and swirled around his body and skin as he breathed, then circled his head before being drawn back through his mouth and nose into his abdomen. It was obvious he had practiced Qi cultivation too.

Li Fan took another look. He'd never seen a real eunuch before. In movies and TV shows, people in this profession were usually villains or comic-relief figures, but to be honest, the eunuch before him had a good face. His features were regular, and he was quite handsome—not the kind of person you'd immediately recognize as an eunuch. He'd only put on women's makeup, and at first glance he looked much like the celebrities Li Fan had seen in advertisements in his previous life. Li Fan hadn't even realized what he was... After all, what kind of normal man would wear lipstick?

"Is he from Liqiu Palace? Why come all the way to this godforsaken place to throw his weight around..."

"Keep your voice down. Don't cause trouble right now."

The unlucky merchants who'd moved to the next table were discussing in low voices. Li Fan glanced their way without thinking, then suddenly sensed something was off. He couldn't put his finger on it, so he turned to look at them again.

He moved too conspicuously, and their leader noticed him at once. The leader was a bearded man in a square cap and long robe. He smiled and nodded at Li Fan, then tapped the table. The other merchants fell silent along with him.

Li Fan looked away, pretending nothing had happened, though sweat was already soaking his back.

Damn it, he'd known the name Dragon Gate Inn was unlucky. Something seemed off about those people too!

He couldn't be sure, but when the merchant leader had tapped the table, his hand had been exposed. Li Fan's sharp eyes had clearly seen calluses on the web between his thumb and index finger, as well as along the side of his index finger. He might be someone who used a sword often. And the bearded man looked fake too! There were five or six of them in all, and they were putting on an act. They probably weren't here for anything good!

Kun! Kun! Things don't look right; we need to get out of here! Damn it, where did you go again?

Li Fan ducked under the table to look for Kun, but he couldn't find it. Instead, the waiter came over with several people.

"Little master, sorry, we're crowded today, and the patrol guards will be coming for a meal later. Would you mind sharing your table with these guests?"

The mixed-race girl and her two attendants were the ones the waiter had brought over.

Li Fan picked up the wine jar. "No problem, no problem. I've just about finished eating anyway, so I'm leaving."

"Thank you." The mixed-race girl had put her blue veil back on. She nodded her thanks to Li Fan.

Li Fan just smiled at her and didn't try to strike up a conversation. He wouldn't believe it if someone said that a foreign girl with two guards had crossed Mount Buzhou just to enjoy the scenery. Beautiful women brought trouble. It was fine to admire them from afar, but he'd better not get involved.

Before he could find Kun, Li Fan spotted the two men and one woman from earlier coming downstairs with the innkeeper. People of the martial world like them apparently didn't want to provoke those from the palace either. They were going to switch to an ordinary room downstairs.

Just then, the inn's front door was kicked open with a bang.

"Damn it! That crooked Daoist from Louguan! He brought his Dragon Herd all the way to Mount Buzhou! Nearly scared me into pissing myself!"

"Hahaha! Ji Chang, you sure were shouting loud just now!"

"Bullshit! You wouldn't have shouted too? Innkeeper! Bring out the meat and wine! The brothers need something to calm their nerves!"

More than twenty soldiers in armor came in noisily, their voices loud as gongs. They shouted and hollered as they filed through the door, holding their long halberds upright. Their scabbards clanged against their skirt armor, as if they were trying to show off their martial prowess.

At the front was a bald man with a full beard. He clutched an iron helmet decorated with pheasant feathers under one arm and shouted as he wiped the sweat off his shining scalp. "Innkeeper, bring me some iced rice wine to quench my th-thirst..."

Ji Chang raised his head and spotted Xuan Niang coming down the stairs. She'd probably been helping Fourth Young Master change his bandages. Her clothes were damp from the hot water and clung to her figure, revealing her shapely curves beneath the tight fabric. Even the flesh of her thighs showed clearly.

The bald man couldn't help wiping the sweat from his hand across his bearded face. "Whoa..."

The soldiers gathered around to get a closer look, flaring their nostrils as they breathed.

Well, what had he said? In times like these, beautiful women really did bring trouble...

Xuan Niang blushed and turned aside, covering her chest. Fifth Brother stepped in front of her, puffing out his massive chest as he roared.

"What are you looking at, you corrupt official?"

"Hm?" The eunuch turned to glare at Fifth Brother... and swallowed.

Li Fan was speechless.

"Ji Chang! Great Ji Chang!" The innkeeper came over with an awkward smile and tried to stop the bald man. "This guest was injured in a fall from his horse. Do me a favor..."

"Fell off a horse?" The bald man finally dragged his gaze from Xuan Niang's thighs and looked at Fourth Young Master's wound. "Bullshit! That's clearly a cut from a blade! You're obviously bandits! Arrest them all and haul them away!"