Sorry (cont.)

However, the moment the words were spoken, the turning point, the "but," arrived instantly:

"But I'm sorry, I can't easily accept sharing someone I like with others in a harmonious and friendly way."

The feelings were real, the liking was real, and the confession was real.

But similarly, possessiveness is also real.

Gently freeing her grip, Shiina Hiyori and bent slightly at the waist.

This was the first and only rejection card that Asakusa Toru had ever received.

"Why—I don't think I need to ask that, do I?"

Somewhat unexpected, but for Asakusa Toru, it was more of a no-brainer.

That's why he likes Shiina Hiyori, that's why Shiina Hiyori is rejecting him at this moment, and that's why he feels it's all expected.

Rather, it would be less like Shiina Hiyori if she didn't refuse.

The balance between emotion and reason, the intersection of emotion and morality.

Yes, I do like Shiina Hiyori.

Once again, Asakusa Toru thought this.

"Hmm." Shiina Hiyori and sat back down.

Although she refused, she did not choose to leave decisively. Instead, she sat down and turned to look at the drama that was still unfolding in front of her, but which seemed to be less captivating than the drama being performed in the audience.

"If you can, you should ask me more questions; it might make me feel much better," Shiina Hiyori said softly.

If it's simply a matter of answering the question 'why,' the reasons she gave when she refused should be sufficient to explain it.

But he still went through the trouble of asking the same question again.

It was clearly not because he couldn't understand her.

Rather, he could tell that she needed a pretext to start a conversation.

It's not easy to reject someone you like who confesses their feelings to you. No matter how many reasons you have, they can't overcome the power of that one word. "I like you."

Who can blame me for liking it? Because I just like it, I...

After the initial surge of emotions subsided, reality became the final consideration.

"Why?"

He asked.

So she spoke up.

"Does Asakusa- kun know?" she asked first, then answered herself, "Asakusa- kun should know."

"I'm in the tea ceremony club. Although I like novels, the club I joined is the tea ceremony club."

Learn etiquette, receive guidance on using props, be gentle and refined, graceful and quiet, and embody harmony, respect, purity, and tranquility.

Harmony, respect, tranquility, and silence.

Purify your mind and moderate your desires.

The tea ceremony sounds wonderful.

When it comes to the tea ceremony, many things come to mind, but the most common one is probably the term "lady of a prominent family".

The primary purpose of most women learning tea ceremony is clearly not out of love for it, but rather to 'increase their social standing'.

Learning the tea ceremony teaches etiquette, manners, elegance, and poise.

She meets the required standards, and then she gets married.

If one wishes to cultivate a refined taste, in addition to calligraphy and painting, the tea ceremony is clearly a very convenient option.

Anyone can tell the quality of a person's writing without talent, but the standards of tea ceremony etiquette obviously vary from person to person.

Of course, this might be a bit extreme, since with the development of the times, the so-called tea ceremony can only be considered a 'hobby' in modern times.

"It's not that there's anything wrong with the tea ceremony." Shiina Hiyori paused slightly, then said softly, "Now, I no longer have any feelings of liking or disliking for the tea ceremony."

"It's just that, surprisingly, I'm actually quite conservative."

Her hands were quietly placed on her lap, her fair fingers interlaced, and the back-and-forth movements clearly revealed the turmoil in the girl's heart.

"I enjoy the outrageous and thrilling parts of mystery novels; it's a personal preference. I like the uncertainty and unknown in the stories, the mysterious future, and the sequels," she said. "But only within the story itself."

"If I were to be the protagonist of a story, I don't think it would be a very interesting one."

When her name first appeared in her Diary, Shiina Hiyori was filled with curiosity and anticipation.

What would it be like if I became a part of the story?

As readers, we must all have this kind of curiosity.

So she was always waiting for him to write his own story.

But the moment he actually wrote it down, his curiosity and anticipation vanished instantly. The moment the words touched reality, she suddenly donned a chainmail of thorns.

Don't offer unsolicited comments, don't push things around, and don't interfere in my feelings.

The girl quickly realized that she wasn't the free-spirited type.

She is very conservative.

So conservative that they might only accept one person for life, so conservative that they might not be able to imagine escaping their current life and no longer spending their days in the library with books in their hands, so conservative that even if their heart is full of joy, they still bite their lower lip and shake their head to reject the confession of the person they love.

Shiina Hiyori is a conservative.

A conservative group that expects to remain forever, making no progress.

"So, I'm sorry." Shiina Hiyori apologized again, lowering her head slightly and looking through Asakusa Toru to Ichinose Honami, who was sitting quietly on the other side. "I can't be Ichinose Honami."

Ichinose Honami is really amazing.

She had thought about this before.

Not only can she casually stay by the side of someone she likes and easily integrate into their life, but she is also adept at other aspects of social interaction, winning the affection of everyone in the class.

The most powerful moment is indeed now.

When the person she likes takes her along and confesses his love to another woman right in front of her, she remains completely unfazed.

I can't do it.

Asakusa Toru: "..."

Will it become a regret?

The girl's heart swayed in the wind.

... As expected, it turned out this way.

What I think in my heart, what I say on my lips, what I long for.

I knew it would turn out this way, which is why I decided to make things clear.

I don't seem to want this outcome, because it would push Shiina Hiyori away from me.

But what is my true intention? What do I hope for right now? What do I want to achieve?

What Asakusa Toru has always pursued is perfection.

Regretfully, we stopped; we regretfully went against the tide.

If money can make up for or salvage something, then money should be used to resolve it.

Money can't solve this.

... And what will we rely on then?

Let me look through my hand. What do I have?

A Diary of infinite possibilities, but the possibility and expectation should be considered non-existent the moment they fail to materialize.

With superhuman physical abilities, it is well-suited for time management.

A naturally beautiful face can increase others' initial goodwill towards you.

Some miscellaneous props are useless when it comes to expressing emotions.

A special item that needs to be ignored.

Asakusa Toru is very casual about many things, but he takes matters of the heart very seriously.

So none of these things are useful.

Her hand was empty, and what she had to face was what Shiina Hiyori was worried about...

Ideas? Perspective? Friends? Family?

As a fellow reader, Asakusa Toru knew very well that the girl's views were not rigid or stubborn; the more immersed a reader was in reading, the less likely they were to be bound by conventional ideas.

Words are free.

Needless to say, she's become a regular NPC in the library since the start of the semester, and there are definitely quite a few people who look at her strangely. You can tell from the farce that just happened on the deck that the girl doesn't care about other people's gazes.

Friends? A friend's words, a friend's thoughts, a friend's attitude.

These will only be influencing factors, not determining factors.

The girl was not someone who would be easily swayed by others.

... family.

That's a word that's quite distant for him.

Shiina Hiyori's father was a mystery novelist, one of many almost unknown writers, but he had still managed to write a few interesting stories.

To some extent, it was the beginning of my interest Shiina Hiyori reading.

At least in this respect, Asakusa Toru had some understanding of his father-in-law.

However, nothing about Shiina Hiyori's mother seems to have been mentioned.

He didn't ask the person involved about their plans, but he figured that their parents and family wouldn't be an obstacle.

She is by no means a defective product of growing up in a bad family.

So...

As expected, what remained in the end was the line drawn from one's own psychology.

If you can get through it, then it's over; if you can't, then it may never be over.

Maybe one day, while the wind is blowing, you'll suddenly understand.

Or perhaps you toss and turn at night, unable to let go of the memory.

Forcing it is pointless.

Missing out will inevitably become a regret.

"The idea that you can have everything go smoothly just by becoming someone else is inherently arrogant."

Asakusa Toru seemed to have reached a dead end, but Ichinose Honami, who had been listening quietly all along, finally spoke up.

"A person cannot become someone else," Ichinose Honami said softly. "Shiina Hiyori cannot become Ichinose Honami, Ichinose Honami does not believe she can become Shiina Hiyori."

"The only thing that limits you is yourself."

"However, perhaps I should thank you." Ichinose Honami smiled. "Thank you for choosing to give up."

Shiina Hiyori: "..."

"... You're welcome."

Although it was my own decision and my own words.

But when she actually heard Ichinose Honami thank her like that... she suddenly felt extremely sad.

"It's hard to express your feelings." Ichinose Honami stood up slightly, but instead of turning around, she leaned forward a few steps and pressed herself against the seat in front of her. "It's even harder to confess your feelings and then refuse."

"I can't let go, I can't do it. On the contrary, I actually admire you for that."

"If I may, I'd like to give you a suggestion."

Only after saying this did she turn around, her eyes meeting those of Shiina Hiyori.

"If you don't want to regret it later, at least try to have it for a moment."