Classroom of the Elite, I Have a Life Simulator

Kitagawa Ryo studied Horikita Suzune, who for some reason seemed exceptionally nervous. It was strange, considering that when he had caught a glimpse of her from afar yesterday, she had been radiating that distinct, dignified aura typical of a girl with long, straight black hair.

After the introductions were finished, the two fell into a bizarre, blind-date-like silence. Kitagawa Ryo looked at the copy of Crime and Punishment resting on the table, trying his best to find a topic of conversation:

"Do you usually read these long foreign literary works, Horikita?"

"What is your take on the engagement between the two of us?"

Horikita Suzune spoke almost at the exact same time as Kitagawa Ryo.

A loud sound suddenly came from a nearby table, sounding as if someone had slammed a knife hard against a plate.

Chapter Fourteen: Why Lie, There Is No Need to Lie

Karuizawa Kei sat huddled alone at the door of Kitagawa Ryo's room. She sat with her knees pulled to her chest, leaning against the door. Since the floor was covered with a soft carpet, she didn't feel cold. Karuizawa Kei touched the fluffy fibers with her fingers, feeling a bit impressed with herself that upon hearing the word "engagement," her first reaction hadn't been an extreme outburst, but rather walking out of the restaurant in a daze before returning here in such a pathetic state.

If this had been six months ago, she definitely would have walked right up to him and demanded an explanation. He had clearly only referred to her as a "friend's younger sister" before, and she had already grilled him on whether he was lying. She would have had plenty to argue about with Kitagawa Ryo, but this time, she had chosen to leave silently.

Karuizawa Kei realized she was afraid and avoiding the truth. She didn't want to face the reality herself; she would rather have the facts explained by Kitagawa Ryo. All she had to do was trust him, nod, and say, "Okay, it's fine, I understand, Ryo, don't worry about me."

Just like the last thing she said to Ryo when she went home last night:

"I'm very happy that Ryo came back to find me."

Yes, that was it. Karuizawa Kei was truly happy about Kitagawa Ryo's return. Ryo was still protecting her just like before, Ryo was still cherishing her just like before...

As if by doing this, she could ignore the fact that he would leave again soon; as if by doing this, she could ignore this inexplicable engagement that had suddenly appeared.

Karuizawa Kei gripped the clothes over her chest tightly. She tore open the packaging of the dress she had bought this morning with such force that it was almost violent. Then, clutching the pure black dress, she pressed her face against the soft fabric. The unique scent of new clothes filled her nostrils, and the hem of the dress cascaded down from her knees like flowing water. In that moment, she felt as if she could see Kitagawa Ryo's black eyes from that morning, filled with urgency and even pleading.

He really did like the way she looked in this dress.

Karuizawa Kei stood up and held the dress in front of her, spinning around. The hotel corridor wall was as bright as a mirror, and her shy, pursed-lipped expression made her look like a bride-to-be trying on a wedding dress.

Bride.

The word suddenly appeared in Karuizawa Kei's mind. It was a natural association that had begun to spread from the word "engagement."

She suddenly remembered when she was in the first grade of elementary school, the homeroom teacher had asked every student to state their ideal profession. Some boys said they wanted to be scientists—though in their understanding, a scientist was just someone shaking a bottle in a lab, regardless of what medicine was inside, the feeling was just incredibly cool. Some boys said they wanted to be professional baseball players; they probably didn't understand the specific rules of baseball either, but they thought the image of swinging a bat and hitting a ball away was just too cool.

At the time, Karuizawa Kei had stammered for a long time and couldn't think of a single profession. Fortunately, the teacher didn't give her a hard time and let her sit down when she truly couldn't answer. Immediately after, a girl whose name and face she had long forgotten stood up and loudly declared that she wanted to be a princess and become a prince's bride.

This answer instantly eclipsed the scientists and professional baseball players who had gone before. The children who had already answered regretted not thinking of such a sensational answer, while those who hadn't followed suit. For a while, the whole class was full of princes and princesses, grooms and brides.

Karuizawa Kei seriously thought about this question again today at fourteen. Now, seven or eight years later, it felt like she still couldn't do anything, nor did she have any ideal profession.

Idol? Writer? Actor? Even though she was at an age where she dared to dream of anything, Karuizawa Kei was distressed to find that she really didn't have any ideals in those areas.

But the moment the word "bride" abruptly appeared, Karuizawa Kei suddenly understood.

Even she had desires and a profession she wanted to become.

"Ryo..."

Karuizawa Kei hugged the dress and slowly squatted down again. As soon as that name appeared in her mind, her heart would involuntarily beat faster, as if she were about to shout "Wow!" There was a strange, itchy, and unbearable feeling in her heart.

As long as Kitagawa Ryo was by her side, she felt a strong sense of security.

Could she define this emotion as "love"?

In this empty corridor, Karuizawa Kei suddenly calmed down.

"Then why, in the six months after Ryo left, did I only think of Ryo after being bullied?"

In fact, in the three months after Kitagawa Ryo cut off contact with Karuizawa Kei, she had enjoyed her status as the core of the class. At that time, she hadn't noticed any negative impact from Ryo's departure, as if she could survive independently of him.

But.

Karuizawa Kei closed her eyes in pain. When Kitagawa Ryo suddenly appeared before her yesterday and pulled her away from that tilting cup of Americano, she had truly and genuinely experienced that long-lost sense of security and dependency, to the point where she had cried while holding him and kissed his neck.

Now, Karuizawa Kei wasn't sure which of her emotions were genuine and which were merely derived illusions—whether she was deceiving her own heart because she craved his protection.

"Liar..."

Karuizawa Kei whispered to herself. She had once read about the "suspension bridge effect." This psychological phenomenon suggests that when a person is crossing a suspension bridge in fear, their heart rate involuntarily increases. If they happen to meet someone else at that moment, they might mistake the increased heart rate caused by the situation for a physiological reaction to the other person, thus developing romantic feelings. Generally, many "hero saves the beauty" scenarios are influenced by the "suspension bridge effect."

"It's so strange..."

It shouldn't be a problem that she liked Ryo because she was saved by him after being bullied at school for so long, right?

Karuizawa Kei shook her head in frustration and bit her lip. She was desperately trying to find evidence to prove that she really liked Ryo, that it wasn't because she was seeking so-called protection, that it wasn't because she couldn't survive on her own, and that it wasn't because Kitagawa Ryo was a willing host for her...

She absolutely could not admit these things, because once she did, Karuizawa Kei would no longer be able to face Kitagawa Ryo.

Who would call such a twisted emotion "love"?

Karuizawa Kei glared hatefully at her reflection on the wall. The young girl had a cute face, but Karuizawa Kei knew how many ugly and indelible scars were hidden beneath this body. Even if some had been washed away by time, they were still carved into Karuizawa Kei's heart one by one. Thinking this way, she hated herself even more for being merely cute, yet having no talent, no willpower, and no way to protect herself.

If only she could.

Karuizawa Kei touched her face in the reflection. She really wanted to start over, to redo everything from the very beginning.

She would work hard to hone herself, never be bullied by anyone, grow up healthy, and then—fall in love again, and like him in a normal way.

Perhaps this was also a weak and escapist thought; Karuizawa Kei didn't even have the intention to change starting from now.

It didn't matter anymore, Karuizawa Kei stood up.

Regardless of whether her feelings of love were real or fake, the only thing she could do now was stay by Kitagawa Ryo's side. Karuizawa Kei had long since become a fragile existence incapable of independence.

"I lost sight of Kei in the blink of an eye; so that's where she went to change into new clothes."

Kitagawa Ryo followed the map on his phone back to the clothing store from earlier that morning, just in time to bump into Karuizawa Kei as she stepped out wearing the long black dress.

"Since Ryo said I looked good in it, I figured I'd let you look at me in it a little longer."

Karuizawa Kei replied with a beaming smile, taking the lead in the conversation. Compared to the morning, when she had been shy and hesitant about wanting it, the current Karuizawa Kei appeared exceptionally confident. She spun around in front of Kitagawa Ryo without a hint of bashfulness, showing off the dress:

"It's the same color as Ryo's eyes, isn't it?"

"I suppose it is."

Kitagawa Ryo was somewhat surprised that Karuizawa Kei hadn't brought up his meeting with Horikita Suzune at noon. He clearly remembered that when Horikita Suzune had uttered the words "engagement," Karuizawa Kei's reaction had seemed quite intense. However, that outburst seemed to have lasted only a moment, and he hadn't heard much about it since.

Kitagawa Ryo himself didn't feel any sense of guilt, as he had made his thoughts clear to Horikita Suzune right from the start:

An engagement was merely a promise made by the previous generation. If neither of them had any intention of following through, there was no need to pay it any mind. In fact, Horikita Suzune only needed to state her stance, and Kitagawa Ryo could handle the rest himself.

What Kitagawa Ryo hadn't expected was that Horikita Suzune's attitude would be rather strange. Instead of clearly refusing right away, she had said that because she was a good friend of her brother, she wanted to understand him better, using this opportunity to learn about Horikita Manabu's preferences.

Kitagawa Ryo naturally bowed to such an inexplicable obsession. He was genuinely curious now about what kind of strange impression Horikita Manabu had left on Horikita Suzune, to the point where she was still so fixated on him two years after he had left.

In any case, after that relatively short conversation, Kitagawa Ryo had chatted with Horikita Suzune about some of his philosophies, and finally, using the book Crime and Punishment as a starting point, they had exchanged views on literature. Kitagawa Ryo felt he had fulfilled the task set by his parents and Horikita Manabu.

Perhaps because the noon conversation had been mentally taxing, or simply because he hadn't napped and lacked energy, even Kitagawa Ryo felt a bit listless after browsing a couple more shops. Just then, Karuizawa Kei read the room and suggested taking a break. The two found a random bench on the side of the road. Since there was a bus stop right next to them, Kitagawa Ryo passed the time by looking at the bus schedule, counting how many stops it would take to reach certain destinations.

Suddenly, he spotted a familiar place name, and his eyes lit up as he pointed it out to Karuizawa Kei:

"Kei, do you remember this park?"

Karuizawa Kei tilted her head and leaned in, pressing her head against Kitagawa Ryo's to take a look:

"It sounds vaguely familiar... Did you and I go there before?"

"We must have. I still remember there's a temple on the hillside there."

Kitagawa Ryo nodded with conviction, resting his head on his right hand as he spoke:

"I remember you were the one who took me there. To be honest, that was the first time I'd ever ridden a bus for so many stops at once. I felt like I was so far away from home, I was actually worried I wouldn't be able to get back."

"I can't believe Ryo was afraid of something like that back then."

Karuizawa Kei let out a giggle, looking as if she found it hard to believe.

"After all, in my mind, Ryo has always been an all-powerful childhood friend."

"What 'all-powerful'? Even if you're on your own, there are always things you can't do."

As he spoke, Kitagawa Ryo unzipped his jacket, took it off, and put it on backward, gesturing to the zipper on his back for Karuizawa Kei to see:

"Look, if you're alone, there's no way to zip up a zipper on your back by yourself."

While saying this, he comically reached his right hand behind his back, trying to pull the zipper up, but he couldn't get it past the halfway point.

"Ryo, you look so stupid..."

Seeing the gazes of passersby gathering on them, Karuizawa Kei hurriedly reminded him:

"Put it on properly, quick."

Once Kitagawa Ryo had put his jacket back on the right way, he said with a grin:

"See? That's why I made Horikita do that move at noon, too. She kept insisting that she could survive on her own and didn't need anyone else."

"And the result?"

Kitagawa Ryo shrugged, recalling how Horikita Suzune had turned bright red at noon, refusing to admit defeat, struggling desperately to pull the zipper up herself.

"Right, let's go to a pet store."

Seemingly struck by a good idea, Kitagawa Ryo stood up abruptly:

"Do you have any plans to adopt a cat or a dog, Kei? I'll buy enough cat or dog food for you in advance. If it gets sick, I also know the director of a pet hospital. That way, even after I'm gone, you'll still have a companion."

Karuizawa Kei could tell at a glance that Kitagawa Ryo had been prepared for this, so she simply played along with a sense of orchestrated surprise and excitement:

"Yes, please! I really like cats and dogs too."

Regardless, all she had to do now was accept every gift Kitagawa Ryo offered. She wanted to build a deeper, tighter bond with him until their Fates were completely intertwined. It felt like only by doing this could she feel a little at ease; even if Kitagawa Ryo were to run away one day, Karuizawa Kei would be able to follow the rope and pull him back to her side.

Half an hour later, Karuizawa Kei saw this beautiful white cat with Hotaru-colored eyes. Upon seeing Kitagawa Ryo and Karuizawa Kei, it rubbed its hazy, Hotaru-colored eyes with its tiny paws and trotted over to Kitagawa Ryo's finger, wagging its fluffy tail as it acted spoiled.

"How about we name it 'Hotaru'?"

Kitagawa Ryo picked it up and handed it into Karuizawa Kei's arms.

"That's a lovely name. I really like it."

Karuizawa Kei took Hotaru gently and softly. She played with the white cat's little paws; Hotaru wasn't fierce at all.

"Then from now on, Hotaru is Kei's cat."

Seeing that Karuizawa Kei was clearly fond of it, Kitagawa Ryo made his conclusion with satisfaction.

"I think this should be a cat that you and I raise together."

Karuizawa Kei lifted Hotaru's little paw and waved it cutely in front of Kitagawa Ryo's eyes.

"Isn't it?"

Her eyes were filled with nothing but amusement.

I don't have to lie, and why would I even need to lie?

[Plot CG: Lying, read complete.]

Chapter 15: The Little Prince and His Rose

On the night Emi Eura's grandmother died of illness, her mother hugged her in the hospital corridor, clutching that body tightly while weeping.

"Why are you crying?"

Ten-year-old Emi Eura asked her mother this at the time.

Taken aback by the question, her mother felt bewildered.

Her mother told her that she would never see her own mother again, and that Emi Eura would never see her grandmother again; wouldn't that be painful?

"Why would it be painful?"

Her mother did not understand the state of mind behind her question.

"Grandmother just died, and we will all die too."

What did that mean? Her mother asked Emi Eura, horrified, her voice trembling as if she could not comprehend her own daughter.

"I don't know what the meaning of being alive is."

Her mother never understood her words, so Emi Eura sighed.

"I don't understand what life is, nor do I know what it means to be alive. From the moment I was born until now, I haven't felt a single shred of resonance."

"And you have never talked to me about these topics either."