Hidan: Anyone Else Relate?!

When Simu got up the next day, a cultist came to report that the Cult Leader wanted him to go to the laboratory.

Simu raised an eyebrow. Instead of heading straight there, he made for the cafeteria.

He had barely stepped outside when a murderous intent pricked at his skin like a needle.

Without hesitation, a thick purple centipede burst from Simu's back and shielded his head.

A black spear plunged down from above, its immense momentum piercing Simu's Weihe. But the centipede's contracting body trapped it in place, leaving it unable to move.

"Damn it! You actually spotted me, you bastard Simu!"

Hidan's furious voice came from above.

Simu didn't even need to look up to know it was that useless idiot.

After all, Hidan had been stubbornly trying to assassinate him three times since last night.

The only reason it had been just three was that after each attempt, Simu had cut off his head again and left it in the Blood Pool for genetic analysis.

Who knew who had fished him out this time?

But the result was no different.

After all, [Koukaku: Mantis] moved far too quickly for an idiot like Hidan to react to.

A dark red flash of lightning streaked across the sky, and Hidan's head dropped limply to the ground once more.

Simu curled his centipede's tail around Hidan's head and taunted him expressionlessly. "Next time you try to assassinate me, I suggest practicing on a rabbit or two first."

The meaning was obvious: with his current level of skill, he probably couldn't even beat a rabbit.

Hidan immediately launched into a furious tirade. "Kamizuki Simu! I'm telling you, you'd better never get injured. The moment I get my hands on your blood, you're dead!"

Simu gave him a speechless look.

So there really were idiots who would openly reveal their abilities. Did he think he hadn't died enough times yet?

Looking at Hidan's moronic expression, then thinking of that Jashin who only ever cackled, Simu suddenly understood a few things.

No wonder Jashin had chosen this guy.

But it didn't matter to Simu. That was before even taking into account the many kinds of Kagune he had.

Even if Hidan got his blood, the most he could do was sacrifice one of Simu's clones. He could always make another.

In short, Simu's abilities were practically the perfect counter to the Jashin Ritual.

And even if Hidan somehow found his real body, Simu also had an Immortal Body. The Jashin Ritual still wouldn't be able to kill him.

With that in mind, Simu dragged Hidan's head into the cafeteria.

It was the lunch rush, and dozens of Jashin Cultists were lining up. The moment they saw Simu and Hidan, they hurriedly stepped aside to make way.

"Are those two the God Children?"

"Hidan's so lucky. He won Lord Jashin's favor and can stay alive even after getting his head cut off."

"Fools really do have all the luck."

These people were longtime members of the Jashin Cult, so of course they knew about Hidan, who had grown up in the cult.

In short, he was a blabbermouth and a brainless idiot who worshipped Jashin.

Hidan felt the people's stares and heard their comments. His anger immediately turned toward them instead.

"What are you looking at, huh? Never seen a severed head before?"

"Keep staring and I'll cut your heads off too! I'll send you straight to meet Lord Jashin!"

Faced with Hidan's nonstop stream of vicious insults, everyone avoided his glare and fell silent.

Not everyone had abilities like Simu's, after all.

As an immortal wielding Curse Power, Hidan had plenty of ways to make them suffer.

Simu pushed up his glasses. Beneath the lenses, his gaze softened with an inscrutable tenderness as he gently stroked Hidan's head.

"Come on, come on. Don't be mad."

Hidan was practically green with rage. "You bastard Simu! How many times have I told you not to treat me like a pet?"

Smiling, Simu carried Hidan over to the cafeteria server and politely said, "Ma'am, I'd like half a roast suckling pig and a bowl of miso soup, please."

The server had cooked for the Jashin Cult for thirty years. She had seen hundreds of corpses and prided herself on being able to cook in the middle of a pile of dead bodies. Even so, she froze when she saw Simu holding a severed head.

"What are you looking at? Hurry up and serve me. I want tonkatsu!" Hidan shouted, thoroughly annoyed.

The server didn't dare argue. She gave an awkward smile and hurried to get to work.

A short while later, Simu took the generously filled tray from her and said politely, "Thank you."

The server looked completely at a loss.

Hidan was different. He glared viciously at her. "You old hag! If it doesn't taste good, I'll kill you!"

The server relaxed. Now that was more like it.

Simu shook his head helplessly.

Could the entire Jashin Cult be full of masochists?

Considering the system's option that said he'd become Jashin's favored consort if he refused to become a follower, Simu was once again certain that Jashin was not a proper god.

Mm.

And the cultists weren't proper cultists, either.

Simu carried his tray over to an empty seat.

Everyone in the cafeteria kept their distance, afraid Hidan might lay eyes on them.

Hidan's reputation did have one upside: the server's hand stopped shaking.

Simu's half a roast suckling pig even came with a pig's trotter, which made him so happy he grabbed it and started gnawing.

The Jashin Cult's food was genuinely good—far better than the food at Simu's university in his previous life.

As he ate, Simu suddenly felt a resentful gaze.

He turned his head.

Oh, it was Hidan.

His little head had been propped up on a chair, where he watched Simu chow down.

Simu smiled apologetically. "Oh, sorry. I forgot about you."

With that, Simu picked Hidan up, pinched his nose to force his mouth open, and poured an entire serving of tonkatsu over rice straight into it.

"Mmph! Mmph!"

"Gonna kill you!"

The carefully prepared tonkatsu must have been delicious. Just look at how Hidan couldn't even speak while he ate!

Simu smiled in satisfaction and went back to his own food.

Hidan finally managed to swallow the whole bowl of rice and the entire piece of tonkatsu. Then he realized the food he'd struggled to get down was flowing right back out through his neck!

"I'm going to kill you, Kamizuki Simu!"

Hidan's voice echoed throughout the Jashin Cult's base.

Of course, Simu was used to it. After polishing off his roast suckling pig, he took a tissue from his clothes and wiped his mouth.

Then he used the same tissue to wipe Hidan's mouth, picked him up with satisfaction, and walked out of the cafeteria.

Hidan: Anyone else know what I mean?