Assassination Classroom: Oops, I Became the Stand-In!
Chapter 13

Whose General Is This? / Behind Every Unreasonable School Rule...

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The two people in the infirmary turned at the sound. Then they saw a demon-like man charging toward them, carrying a pale-faced student over his shoulder like a corpse.

Their minds went blank. Before they could make sense of what was happening, the man had rushed into the infirmary and dumped the corpse onto a bed.

The corpse on the bed abruptly sat up, clutching his stomach. He coughed twice, then muttered, "Kito, I didn't die from exhaustion, but I'm about to die from your rock-hard elbow..."

Whose Subordinate Is This?

The faint smell of disinfectant filled the infirmary, and the medical equipment gleamed coldly.

"Your blood sugar's a little low." The school nurse checked the reading on the glucometer as she examined Mikage Touji's complexion. "Did you skip breakfast or lunch? That won't do. You young people need to learn to take care of yourselves."

Mikage Touji's eye twitched. He knew this school nurse, Hoshinomiya Chie.

She was the math teacher in their class. She always seemed tipsy and smelled of alcohol during lessons. It was obvious she went out drinking a lot at night!

"It's nothing serious. You just need a little sugar. Be more careful next time." Hoshinomiya Chie put away the glucometer and wagged her index finger in admonishment.

Mikage Touji listened thoughtfully. So when your mental energy ran out, your body would start burning sugar to make up for it?

"Is that so?" The girl with golden-pink hair who had been with Hoshinomiya Chie seemed relieved. She patted her ample chest and smiled. "I'm so glad you're okay."

Huh? What was this?

Mikage Touji instinctively raised a hand to shield his eyes.

At that moment, the girl seemed to radiate countless soft beams of light from behind her, spreading outward and illuminating all creation.

A glint flashed in Mikage Touji's eyes.

It was you!

You stole my light!

I'd thought General Kushida was already peerless, but it seemed there was someone even more formidable. Whose subordinate was this?

"Ichinose Honami, you and Mikage haven't even met before. Isn't this a bit much?" Hashimoto Masayoshi stepped forward at just the right moment, blocking Mikage Touji from view. He shrugged as he spoke.

Ichinose Honami?

Prompted by Hashimoto Masayoshi, Mikage Touji recalled what he knew about her.

Ichinose Honami was the most likely person to unite Class B, a class second only to their own Class A.

No! It was more accurate to say she'd already united Class B. In fact, she'd brought the whole class together on the very first day.

With her formidable social skills, sweet looks, and gentle personality, she'd won over everyone in Class B on day one. The only reason people didn't call her Class B's leader yet was that they hadn't learned the truth about the S System. Once it was revealed, there'd be no doubt that she'd be their leader!

What's more, her network of connections extended to other classes as well. You could tell from how many people in their class were friends with Ichinose.

"You can't put it that way, Hashimoto. We're all students at this school. Even if we don't know each other now, we're bound to meet eventually. Isn't it nice to show some concern for a future friend in advance?"

A beam of light shot into Mikage Touji's inner world, dragging him straight out of his thoughts.

There it was again!

With words that seemed to enlighten all living things, Mikage Touji was sure she could last longer than three minutes if she turned into Ultraman.

"Yeah, yeah! I can't argue with you. There's just no dealing with people who are this good at socializing."

Out of the corner of his eye, Hashimoto saw that Mikage Touji had gathered himself. He promptly stepped aside and spread his arms with an exasperated look.

"Here..."

A hand in a black glove offered him a cup of warm water mixed with glucose. Kito Hayato had gone to fetch it while everyone else was talking.

"Thanks, Kito. And thanks for bringing me here." Mikage Touji accepted the cup, his eyes glinting.

"..."

Kito Hayato paused, then replied, "You're welcome. It's what classmates should do."

Mikage Touji then looked at Ichinose Honami, who had been standing nearby and waiting for them to finish. "Thanks to you too. I appreciate your concern."

"You're welcome. It was only natural." Ichinose Honami reached out her hand and smiled sweetly. "Let me introduce myself properly. I'm Ichinose Honami from Class 1-B. I look forward to getting along with you."

"I'm Mikage Touji." He set his cup on the cabinet beside him and shook her hand, his voice brimming with enthusiasm. "I've heard so much about you, Ichinose. My classmates have all said you're an outstanding person."

"Oh, not at all. The students in Class A are too kind." Ichinose Honami bashfully scratched her fair cheek.

"Then... this might be a little embarrassing to ask, but could you tell me?"

Mikage Touji's expression suddenly turned serious. His previously playful face grew stern, as if he were about to make some momentous decision.

"Huh? Tell you what?"

"Which hypnosis app do you use? Would you mind sharing it with me?" As he spoke, he pulled out his phone. "I can pay you points."

"..."

"Ahaha." Ichinose Honami gave an awkward laugh. "Mikage, there's no such thing."

"..." Mikage Touji was stunned. "There isn't? Seriously?"

"It'd be strange if there were!" Hashimoto Masayoshi chimed in from the side.

"I... I see..." Mikage Touji looked dejected.

"All right, you two, stop fooling around." Hoshinomiya Chie came over with the examination report. "There's nothing wrong with him apart from low blood sugar. He's perfectly healthy. I haven't seen such a textbook report in ages. Stay for another twenty minutes, and you can leave if everything's fine."

"See? I told you I was fine." Mikage Touji took a sip of the grape-flavored drink. The warm, sugary water slid down his throat, bringing a touch of warmth.

Over the next twenty minutes, Mikage Touji chatted with Ichinose Honami for quite a while. Hashimoto Masayoshi occasionally joined in, while Kito stood with his arms crossed, leaning against the doorframe and quietly listening to them talk.

By asking questions indirectly, Mikage Touji picked up quite a bit of information from Ichinose Honami. He also couldn't help marveling at her terrifying social skills. Talking to her never made anyone feel pressured. Instead, it was like a spring breeze sweeping across the earth, leaving you feeling at ease.

Mikage Touji figured that if the school hadn't strictly forbidden anyone from telling the first-years about the S System, Ichinose Honami would probably have been the first of them to figure out the truth behind the exams.

"Well, Ichinose, let's talk again some other time." Once he felt mostly recovered, Mikage Touji was the first to say goodbye.

After adding Ichinose to his friends, Mikage Touji slipped his phone into his pocket and waved goodbye to her.

"Mm. I also think there's something fascinating about talking with you, Mikage..."

Ichinose Honami nodded and watched them leave with a flawless smile.

Only after Mikage Touji and the others vanished around the corner did Ichinose Honami lower her waving hand and furrow her brow slightly.

"What's wrong, Honami? I've never seen you make that face before," Hoshinomiya Chie asked curiously.

"Mm..." Ichinose Honami shook her head, though she still seemed uncertain. "I'm not sure. Something feels strange, but I can't put my finger on it..."

"Maybe it's that Mikage student. I heard his classmates in Class A call him a weirdo."

"Huh? Really?"

"If you think something's off, why not go find out? Put your charm to work and sweep him off his feet."

"Teacher, please stop saying things like that all the time."

"Haha, I'm just kidding. But seriously, if something feels wrong, it's best to figure out what it is."

"Is that so..."

Meanwhile, the three of them had already left the infirmary and started talking.

"So, what do you think of Ichinose Honami?" Hashimoto Masayoshi asked.

"Well..."

Mikage Touji slowed his pace, gathering his thoughts.

"She's a good person." After thinking it over for a while, that was all Mikage Touji could come up with. "Mm... a capable good person," he added.

"Everyone who knows her says the same thing." Hashimoto Masayoshi rolled his eyes.

"Hashimoto, apart from Ichinose, is there anyone else in Class B worth keeping an eye on?" Mikage Touji lowered his gaze and rubbed his chin as he suddenly asked.

"I heard there's a guy named Kanzaki Ryuji, but apparently he's already completely fallen for Ichinose." Hashimoto Masayoshi looked like he was enjoying the gossip.

"Then that's strange..."

"What's strange?"

She's too perfect...

Ichinose Honami...

As Orochimaru would say, this is sugoi!

She was beautiful, had incredible social skills, and was exceptionally observant. Otherwise, Mikage Touji wouldn't have needed to distract her with the "hypnosis app" just now. He'd also heard she was one of the top students academically.

A student this perfect... why wasn't she in Class A?

Mikage Touji, who'd gotten in through System-chan's back door, didn't count.

Even Morishita Ran, with her chuuni tendencies, childishness, grudges, and love of pranks, and the low-key Yamamura Miki had been assigned to Class A. That meant the school was willing to overlook minor flaws that did no real harm.

Yet Ichinose was in Class B...

Class D was known as the defective class, while Class C's acting leader was a violent delinquent.

So what was wrong with Class B?

Behind Every Unreasonable School Rule...

After several days of classes, the new students welcomed their first weekend at Kouiku.

The morning sun fell across the white sheets. Tiny flecks of dust swirled through the beam of light...

The clock on the wall ticked steadily until it struck eight. The person sleeping in bed opened his eyes right on time, guided by his internal clock.

He sat up without changing expression, put on his glasses, got out of bed, folded his blanket, and changed into his uniform. His daily routine was as precise as clockwork.

That was the current Student Council President, Horikita Manabu.

After finishing everything, Horikita Manabu turned on his phone to check whether anything unexpected had happened at school.

As usual, he ignored the challenge request Miyabi Nagumo had sent him. His finger paused over a message from someone saved as "Little Sister," but in the end, he pretended not to see it and cleared the notification.

Horikita Manabu walked to the sink. As water swished into his mouth, he opened Kouiku's internal school forum.

The school had set it up specifically for students to discuss things. The school and the Student Council also posted announcements there from time to time.

Students weren't allowed to contact their families for three years, nor were they allowed to send messages to the outside world. It was inevitable that some would develop negative feelings and vent anonymously on the forum. As long as they didn't post anything related to crime, the school generally ignored it.

The school and the Student Council also regularly monitored students' moods on the forum and assessed them. If someone seemed too down, they informed the Exam Committee, which would make slight adjustments to the next Special Exam.

Horikita Manabu took a sip of water and skillfully tapped the option to sort topics by popularity.

The next second—

"Pfft—!"

[Advanced Nurturing High School Forum Trending Topics] [1. This is the boss of Class 1-C! Could you do something like this?!] [2. The first-year popularity rankings for boys/girls you'd most like to date] [3. First-year gloominess rankings] [Definitely Not Anonymous 6457: A world-shaking battle just took place in the eastern restroom of the first-year building. It's going to shock students across Japan. I can't put the details into words, so please watch the video below.] [Definitely Not Anonymous 6457: Could you do something like this?! .MP4] [Dreams of Becoming a Soccer Star: Let's see what this is... Yeah, I couldn't do that. You win, OP. Where did this King of Red History come from?] [It Must've Been the Duck People: My eyes... I need to wash them out... But I'm going to make a parody right away, so everyone at school can have the same eyes as me.] [Such a Beautiful Me: That's right! I can't believe I had to see something so disgraceful. It's not beautiful at all. And that red-haired boy—don't you dare show your face in front of me again.] [Katsuragi Is the Strongest: Pfftahaha, so this is the boss of Class C? He looks like a dog.] [Against Ryuen's Tyranny: Don't slander him. That lowlife delinquent doesn't deserve to be the boss of Class C. He couldn't even beat Albert with a sneak attack.] [Class C's Smartest Guy: He's brought shame on all of Class C.] [Student Council President Horikita Manabu: Setting aside Ryuen Kakeru's deliberate damage to the restroom, this... indecent behavior is unbecoming of Kouiku. Please come to the Student Council this afternoon to give a report in person. @Ryuen Kakeru] [Student Council Vice President Miyabi Nagumo: Oh dear, someone just reported that the restroom was damaged, and now we've found the culprit. @Horikita Manabu, senpai, I'll leave it to you. I can't handle this kind of underclassman.] [Genius All-Rounder (Looking for a Girlfriend): If it were me, I could've taken out a loser like that with one move. I'll have you know that the Japanese national taekwondo team tried to recruit me back in middle school...]
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