The midday sun blazed like a freshly baked egg tart, its warmth settling on the skin so thickly that you could almost smell its sweetness. Qin Yanan wasn't used to Junsha's scorching early-summer heat. Yet as she strolled through the campus, the shy glances, hurried footsteps, and lively chatter all carried the youthful innocence and energy unique to that age. Gradually, a wistful envy stirred in her heart.
At twenty-five, she wasn't exactly old, but she wasn't young, either. Normally, Qin Yanan hardly ever gave her age much thought. Zhu Juntang was a little fairy, but people often called her the Qin Family's little princess, too. And princesses never had to worry about finding a husband.
But then her great-grandfather had gone and found her an eighteen-year-old fiancé... Before the Dragon Boat Festival, word had come from the old residence that Qin Yanan didn't need to go back and pay her respects to the old man for the holiday. Instead, she was to stay in Junsha and keep Liu Chang'an company.
Even her father couldn't argue with that. Qin Yanan had no choice, while Zhu Juntang had run back to Taiwan to play the good girl and dote on her parents.
At least Zhong Qing was still in Junsha. When Qin Yanan had nothing to do, she could invite her to a spa or go shopping at Baolong Center. It was nice to have someone around, so she wouldn't be left with nothing to do.
Qin Yanan turned around and saw Liu Chang'an looking at her. She couldn't help frowning. "I thought I was too ugly for you to accept. What are you looking at me for?"
"A woman's charm takes many forms, but in the end, beauty is what matters most. Doesn't the Book of Songs say, 'Plainness is the basis of color'? Plain means white. For a woman, fair skin is the hardest thing to achieve. Often her brows, eyes, mouth, and teeth are all picture-perfect, and her only flaw is her complexion." Liu Chang'an quoted a passage from Li Yu's Xianqing Ouji. "When did I say you were too ugly for me to accept? I think you're beautiful. And what's especially rare is your fair skin, which makes you even prettier."
Qin Yanan was slightly taken aback. But since he was complimenting her, the irritation faded from her expression, and surprise crept into her heart. Of course, she hadn't come to see Liu Chang'an today because she was bored and wanted to check on her "fiancé's" studies. Her father's secretary had arranged the visit, and she'd hoped to use the chance to discuss things with Liu Chang'an. If he thought she was ugly, why not play along and help her put an end to the engagement?
But now he was suddenly saying she was pretty. Could Qin Yanan be blamed for feeling like her plan had gone awry?
"You clearly said you understood what my great-grandfather meant, and that you didn't want this!" Qin Yanan was so anxious she wanted to stamp her foot, but she didn't want to act childish in front of a boy seven years younger than her.
"I don't want it, but how could you possibly be ugly when you look so much like your great-grandmother? Don't be so self-conscious. You should have a proper understanding of yourself. It's a good thing for a girl to be pretty. Being too modest about it is just affected." His great-granddaughter was already grown, yet Liu Chang'an's smile still shone like brilliant sunlight.
Qin Yanan didn't even bother taking issue with him calling her affected. She stared at him in disbelief. "You... You know what my great-grandfather wants, and you don't want it—but it really isn't because you think I'm ugly? It's just because I look like my great-grandmother?"
Liu Chang'an nodded. The past would eventually vanish like shattered dust. He had buried those memories and feelings and didn't want to stir them up again... If he carried the emotions of countless years around in his head every moment, he might have ended up imagining things nonstop, just like Zhu Juntang. If he got together with Qin Yanan, he might not be able to tell her apart from Ye Sijin. With all those tangled emotions, he would struggle to maintain the calm state of mind he needed for the life he was living now.
Qin Yanan couldn't understand. It wasn't as if he'd lived with her great-grandmother or shared a close, blood-related bond with her. Why would being with Qin Yanan make him imagine things and feel uncomfortable?
But none of that mattered. It was his business. As long as he didn't want the marriage, that was enough. Qin Yanan tentatively asked, "Since you don't want it and I don't want it either, why don't we just put a stop to the whole thing?"
"Sure. I'll write a letter to Qin Peng and explain." Liu Chang'an nodded solemnly. "This marriage absolutely cannot happen. You can rest easy."
A smile spread across Qin Yanan's face. She tried to keep it restrained, but somehow felt shy, looking at this younger cousin who was nothing like the boy she'd first imagined. "The adults are the ones who keep meddling and trying to pair us up. I think you must have someone you like, right?"
Qin Yanan couldn't sway her great-grandfather herself, but she figured Liu Chang'an certainly could. After all, her great-grandfather had been thrilled to receive a message from Liu Chang'an. It had left her with the impression that anything he wrote carried great weight and influence.
If he was willing to write such a serious letter now, he could surely undo the impression his earlier message had made.
Liu Chang'an nodded. As the saying went, "Though the match has not yet come to pass, the excitement is quite real; though the matter has not been experienced, its nature is easy to understand. The imagined pleasures are twice as stirring as those enjoyed by someone already immersed in a life of tenderness." Anyone who hadn't experienced love between a man and a woman could lose themselves in it just by imagining it. Liu Chang'an wasn't one of those people, but it had been a very, very long time since he'd been close to a woman. Of course, he had someone he liked, and he had desires like any man.
"Was it one of those two girls just now?" Qin Yanan had the natural pride of someone born into a powerful family—perhaps even enough to call it arrogance. But she'd still developed the basic attentiveness required of someone in the system. She hadn't said anything during the meal, but that didn't mean she'd been lost in her own thoughts; she'd also kept an eye on the others.
Both girls were striking, especially the one with the great figure and the nicely sized little breasts Qin Yanan wished Zhu Juntang had... Though Zhu Juntang's were probably bigger.
"Just worry about your own affairs. You're clearly not that young anymore. Find someone suitable and get married." Liu Chang'an sighed.
Qin Yanan nearly choked on his words. She'd only learned a little more about this younger cousin, but that was already enough to show her how far he was from her first impression. He lived in poverty, but supported himself. Huang Shan had also told her he was an excellent student, and he could quote classical poetry and prose with ease. It wasn't as if he'd prepared all that just to meet her. He'd only just complimented her, and she'd even been about to say he had a knack for wooing girls. Who could have expected him to follow it up with, "You're clearly not that young anymore"? Was that something a boy with normal social skills would say to a girl?
Maybe it was because he definitely didn't see her as a romantic prospect. She was seven years older than him... Qin Yanan took a deep breath and suppressed the urge to knock him on the head. What a brat!
"Still, even though I can't marry you, I'll take good care of you. If you ever face some insurmountable hardship in life—say, a serious illness, being hunted by a mysterious figure, or being bullied by an overbearing in-law—or if you want to live longer, get your skin tightened or your looks enhanced, care for your skin, or maintain your figure, you can come to me." Liu Chang'an spoke earnestly.
Qin Yanan was both exasperated and amused, and couldn't help giving Liu Chang'an a light smack. She was Qin Peng's granddaughter; no one had ever bullied her, not once in her life. And the ridiculous things he'd just listed were even less likely. Qin Yanan assumed he was joking, but she was in a good mood. As long as Liu Chang'an turned down the marriage, everything would be fine.
That was the reality of male dominance. Even women had to accept it. A man marrying a woman seven years younger than him was no problem at all. But if he married a woman seven years older, he'd attract too many strange looks and too much annoying gossip.
"If anything like that happens, I probably can't come to you. But I'll still come see you for the Dragon Boat Festival. There are plenty of things I can ignore, but Great-Grandfather's insistence that we cousins grow closer is one thing I have to follow." Qin Yanan's smile grew more natural and gentle. "All right, go back and pay attention in class."
She really was talking to him like he was just her younger cousin... Liu Chang'an didn't mind. He turned and headed back to the classroom, though even he felt unusually conflicted inside.
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