Warhammer 40K: The Jokester Who Saves the World
Chapter 3

The 12-Year-Old Father and Over 10,000 Sons

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On the tenth day aboard the Bucephalus, Hogg, who had no need for sleep but did so out of habit, woke up in the quarters built for every Primarch on the Emperor's flagship.

Hogg and the Emperor had spoken at length over the past few days, and Hogg felt fully the trust the Emperor placed in him; as they talked, the topics often drifted.

From Hogg exposing the Emperor's past experiences with Roman noblewomen on ancient Terra, to the Emperor teasing Hogg about being a lonely bachelor in his previous life, and even discussing various works from the 2K era, the two found common ground.

Hogg discovered that the Emperor was not as dull as he had imagined; in truth, he was just a socially awkward science nerd who was a bit repressed, and his status as a Perpetual made his emotional intelligence as poor as a dog's.

Of course, Hogg received his fair share of psychic slaps to the face, but all in all, the Emperor—or Neoth—was a decent person, and Hogg was even granted permission to call him Neoth.

At first, Hogg was very confused as to why Neoth trusted him, a visitor from an outer universe, so much. After he posed this question, the Emperor fell silent and said:

[Because you are human. In your memories, I saw your entire life. You were educated, or rather, protected very well. Therefore, I trust you. Even if you are not outstanding, I am honored to have an offspring like you.]

Upon hearing the Emperor's answer, Hogg felt an inexplicable wave of emotion, but he immediately realized he had been charmed by Old Man Yellow. The two began trading trash talk again, ending only when Hogg admitted his mistake.

For the past few days, Hogg had been following the Emperor to learn and conduct research—though, naturally, Hogg was the one being researched.

Benefiting from a Primarch-level brain and a robust physique, the two exchanged information at a rapid pace, gaining a more detailed understanding of Imperium.

The Great Crusade of Imperium was currently in its middle-to-late stages. The Solar Segmentum was fully conquered and served as the rear base for the Crusade, while other sectors were treated as the front lines, slowly being reclaimed by Imperium.

Additionally, eleven Primarchs had officially returned, though Afa was still in hiding, and the Lion had just returned.

Emperor gave Hogg two years to reorganize and recuperate, and he even assigned him a Tech-Priest Magos from Mars to serve as his tutor.

He then threw Hogg onto an information-infusion machine, using psychic power to pump various knowledge into him for a week straight, nearly turning his brain to mush, claiming it was to broaden his horizons so he wouldn't waste a Primarch's brain.

"Primarch, you have 3 minutes of rest remaining. Next, you will learn the basic construction principles of plasma reactors."

The emotionless, synthesized female voice emanated from the bionic organs of Candice Laza. Regarding the task of teaching a Primarch assigned by the Emperor, Candice Laza had initially felt extremely honored and excited.

The direct reaction was that upon receiving the news, the operating frequency of her electromagnetic sensors increased by 17 percent, and the electrical signal conduction in her biological tissues became more active; there was nothing more worth studying than teaching a Primarch.

However, looking at the Primarch slumped on the soft sofa of the Bucephalus, Candice Laza's mindset underwent a slight change.

According to the data shared by the Emperor, the Eleventh Primarch's learning speed was exceptionally rapid compared to the others, comparable even to the Tenth Legion's Primarch, Ferrus, but he was simply too lazy.

To use an old Terran saying, he "did not look like a ruler at all." As long as no one was watching him, he would slump in a corner like a pile of waste oil.

"Ah! My Magos, I have been studying continuously for 73 hours, and I only got 10 minutes of rest?" A powerful but listless voice rang out.

Hogg's schedule had been packed tight these past few days; he studied by day, studied by night, had to find time to be researched by the Emperor, and occasionally had to be beaten by psychic slaps.

[Hogg, your Legion is arriving (Golden text)] A psychic call hit Hogg's brain.

[Ah! Understood, Father.] "Candice Laza, my offspring are coming. I can't let them see me like this, can I? I request a day off," came the pitiful voice from the sofa.

"Sigh! Very well, but tomorrow I expect to see you build a stable Type 7 plasma infantry reactor all by yourself."

Arriving on the deck, Hogg wore the power armor crafted by the Emperor's own hands. Compared to the 3-to-4-meter height of other Primarchs, Hogg's armor was custom-made at 2 meters, scaled down proportionally from the Adeptus Custodes' armor, emphasizing defensive capabilities with a modular design that allowed for future component swaps.

After the Emperor handed him this armor, dubbed the Raider, Hogg immediately took a bucket of paint and painted the golden surface black, which angered the Emperor so much that he slapped Hogg's head with several golden psychic strikes until it glowed with golden light.

Beside the low orbit of Alicia, a gray-black Gloriana Class battleship appeared near the planet's spaceport. As the ship docked, the Astartes of the Eleventh Legion, the Dark Raiders, stepped forth to meet their Primarch.

In the Alicia hive plaza, over ten thousand warriors of the Eleventh Legion stood tall, surrounded by the gathered populace of Alicia. As the sound of metal scraping against the floor was captured by Leman's ears, a figure walked onto the platform.

The Astartes of the Eleventh Legion felt their initial unease instantly replaced by a massive sense of happiness. Even without prior contact, they knew the figure before them was their father. Even after ten thousand years, this memory would accompany them for the rest of their lives, and they would be proud of it.

Looking at the heroic warriors below, the psychic resonance allowed Hogg to instantly confirm their identity. "My cubs." Removing his helmet, the Primarch's face was revealed to all.

Quietly watching his offspring, Hogg Menethil began his first speech.

His crisp voice rang out, spreading to every corner of the hive: "Remove your helmets and let me see your faces, my sons."

Following the Primarch's command, over ten thousand warriors removed their helmets in unison, and a variety of bizarre hairstyles came into view. Hogg, who had prepared a draft, was choked into silence by the colorful spectacle, his expression one of constipation.

But in the eyes of the Eleventh Legion warriors, their father—with a golden halo above his head and long, snow-white hair, handsome and beautiful—was smiling at them with satisfaction. The overwhelming pride and happiness hit them so hard they couldn't even steady their footing, forced to increase the output of their servo-motors to remain upright.

Hoo... After exhaling to adjust his state, Hogg continued his speech:

"My sons, warriors of the Eleventh Legion, when you came to my side, I already felt your loyalty and indomitable will.

My proud children, the bond of genes connects us, the brilliance of the Imperial Truth lights our way forward, and we are human—proud humans!

Here I promise, as your gene-father, I will lead you to victory after victory, fighting to protect humanity!"

Handfuls of pre-prepared flower petals rained down from the sky, and the people in the plaza cheered spontaneously.

The Eleventh Legion had welcomed back their Primarch, and every Alician was infected by the atmosphere of the scene, swearing to follow the footsteps of the Emperor's son.

[Are you satisfied, My Lord?] A hooded figure appeared beside the Emperor, who was hiding his form among the crowd.

[Yes, Malcador. We need bonds to stabilize his existence, we need allies, and he has become my offspring—is there any connection more profound than this?]

[But the future we glimpsed shows that your offspring are...]

[...]

[No, he is different! I trust my judgment. He is human, and he will always be human.]

[As you command, My Lord.]

As the petals fell across the sky, the two figures vanished from the plaza; after all, they were not the protagonists of today.

End of Chapter
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