A Fine Plan, but I'd Like to Make a Small Change

Lu Bian: [I've finished creating the Dog Beating Technique. Come take a look, brothers! @everyone]

Kakashi Hatake: [Did you call everyone here just for this?]

Lu Bian: [Please watch my demonstration.]

Lu Bian uploaded the demonstration video of the Dog Beating Technique he'd painstakingly filmed to the Chat Group.

Lu Bian: [Kakashi, if I remember right, your Summoning Technique summons the Eight Ninja Hounds, doesn't it? What do you think of my Dog Beating Technique?]

Kakashi Hatake: [Terrified.]

Shi Tianwu: [The moves are exquisite, the variations truly ingenious. I can see echoes of the Supreme World Shocking Era in them.]

Lu Bian: [That's right. I came up with it in a flash of inspiration, combining some of the variations from the Book of Supreme World Ordering.]

Shi Tianwu: [Just some of them? Or are you being modest?]

Lu Bian: [This staff technique might not be very effective against people, but it works wonders on four-legged animals.]

Lu Bian: [Anyone want to learn it?]

[Lu Bian uploaded the Dog Beating Technique]

[Kakashi Hatake downloaded the Dog Beating Technique]

Lu Bian: [Kakashi, you want to learn my Dog Beating Technique?]

Kakashi Hatake: [You can never have too many skills. I might not use it myself, but it'd be pretty good to teach someone else.]

Lu Bian: [Then could I ask you to teach my Dog Beating Technique to someone on your side?]

Kakashi Hatake: [Who do you want me to teach?]

Lu Bian: [Naruto Uzumaki.]

Kakashi Hatake: [Naruto Uzumaki...]

Kakashi Hatake: [All right. But let's be clear: if Naruto Uzumaki doesn't want to learn, that's not my fault.]

Lu Bian: [I know. Naruto Uzumaki's actually pretty contrary, and this is when he's most fond of playing pranks. Not many people like a bratty little troublemaker.]

Lu Bian: [Let's put on an act before you teach him.]

Kakashi Hatake: [What kind of act?]

Lu Bian: [Like this... then this... and then this...]

Kakashi Hatake: [A fine plan, but I'd like to make a small change.]

Another day of skipping school.

Naruto Uzumaki was catching fish by a creek in the hills behind the village.

Why was he skipping school?

Of course, it was because school was just too boring. Besides... he'd forgotten to do his homework. He was afraid the teacher would check, and he had no classmates who'd let him copy theirs, so Naruto simply skipped class.

He could already picture Iruka, his homeroom teacher, hauling him back. He'd definitely be punished again. Would he have to carry buckets of water or balance books on his head? Either way, he'd be standing outside the classroom, so he might as well fill his stomach before getting punished.

Just as he was about to catch a fish, Naruto suddenly heard someone laughing uproariously in the distance. The laughter pierced his ears like a demonic tune, and Naruto jumped in fright and hid.

The laughter drew nearer, then farther away. Whoever it was kept moving around.

Naruto then heard a rustling behind him, as if some beast were moving through the plants. He hurriedly turned to look.

Kakashi Hatake clamped one hand over Naruto's mouth and put him in a rear naked choke with the other arm, making sure he couldn't make a sound.

Naruto Uzumaki broke out in a cold sweat.

"Spies" were an important topic in class at the Ninja Academy, and a guaranteed question on every exam. Naruto figured he'd definitely run into a spy.

The ninja covering his mouth wore a Konoha Forehead Protector, but he was concealing his face so thoroughly that he had to be a spy. No doubt about it.

Naruto Uzumaki had never seen anyone with only one eye showing.

The laughter gradually faded into the distance.

The Batman Who Laughs was probably a Konoha ninja, right?

Help!

Naruto Uzumaki hadn't become Hokage yet. He couldn't die!

"Kid, my opponent's already gone."

"I'm a Konoha jonin. You don't need to be nervous."

Kakashi Hatake let Naruto Uzumaki go.

"Wha—? Help! He's a Konoha jonin!" Naruto Uzumaki shouted.

"I told you I'm a Konoha ninja. Why are you still yelling?"

"Y-y-you..." Naruto started to stammer.

"I don't have time to explain. I've got something important to do." Kakashi rose from the bushes.

"?"

Kakashi jogged off, deliberately running toward another part of the hills at a speed Naruto could keep up with.

He'd reached the place he'd prepared ahead of time.

Kakashi took out a small shovel and began digging.

"..."

Naruto followed and hid in a nearby tree, watching.

Naruto wondered, What's this guy digging for? Could it be treasure? A ninja scroll? Or... the corpse of another ninja?! What secret is he hiding here?

He dug it up.

It was a dead rooster.

Kakashi dug a few times and unearthed the dead rooster. It was covered with enormous centipedes crawling all over it.

"Eek!!!"

Seeing the horrifying centipedes, Naruto Uzumaki was so scared he fell out of the tree.

If it had only been one or two centipedes, Naruto would've dared to jump out and scare a girl with a branch. But there were more than a dozen huge centipedes crawling over the dead rooster Kakashi had dug up. His trypophobia kicked in on the spot.

"W-why did you get so many centipedes?" Naruto asked Kakashi, nervously walking over.

"Heh. Because I'm going to eat them," Kakashi said, turning to Naruto.

His face was covered by a mask, but Naruto could tell Kakashi was smiling at him.

"H-how are you going to eat them? Those bugs don't look edible at all!" Naruto felt sick.

"Don't worry. If you prepare them properly, they're pretty tasty."

Kakashi took out a scroll and released its seal. A pile of camping stoves and cookware appeared beside him.

Kakashi picked up a small knife and removed the centipedes' venom glands and fangs, then tossed them into a pot.

"Could you help me get some water?" Kakashi asked.

"...Mm." Naruto picked up another pot and went to the creek to fetch water.

After Naruto brought the water back, Kakashi started heating it. He put the cleaned centipedes in the water to boil.

Naruto watched with keen interest.

Kakashi handled the centipedes with such skill that, as Naruto watched, he stopped being afraid of them.

The boiling water cooked the dozen or so centipedes through. Kakashi poured out the water, then peeled off their shells.

He removed the centipedes' heads and tails. Once peeled, their meat was exposed, pearly white and translucent, just like shrimp.

Kakashi poured oil into a pot. When it was half hot, he put in the centipede meat and deep-fried it.

Naruto stood beside him, drooling.

When the centipede meat had turned a faint golden brown, Kakashi lifted it from the oil, sprinkled on some seasoning, and put a piece in his mouth, chewing it slowly.

"Still think it's disgusting now that you know it's a centipede?" Kakashi asked Naruto.

"Not at all! Not at all! Give me some to try~!"

"Here you go."

Naruto took the freshly fried centipede from Kakashi and stuffed it straight into his mouth. The scalding meat made him let out all sorts of strange noises.

"Ha! The centipede's biting you," Kakashi laughed.

"Mmmph!!" Naruto wrinkled his face at Kakashi while quickly chewing the tender, fragrant centipede meat.