"What are those two white balls?"
"One's the idiot who survived the Uchiha Clan. The other's the demon fox brat."
"So what are they doing?"
"Leave them alone. Those two have nine lives."
In a shadowy alley, two figures darted past.
Uchiha Sen, wrapped in a bedsheet, pulled a wooden sandal from his waist and pressed a jumble of buttons on its sole. Then he whispered:
"Double-Zero Two, respond if you can hear me. Double-Zero Two, respond if you can hear me. Beep-boop, beep-boop."
Naruto Uzumaki, also wrapped in a bedsheet, looked grave. He reached around to his waist, pulled out a wooden sandal, and replied:
"Double-Zero Two here. Awaiting orders! Beep-boop, beep-boop."
"The planet invasion plan has been exposed. Double-Zero Two, remember to keep your identity hidden. If necessary, infiltrate the enemy's ranks!"
With that, Uchiha Sen fled in the other direction. At a deserted spot, he gazed at the wide-open sky, then pulled out his wooden sandal again:
"Hole-Hole Monster calling Blue Star Headquarters. I've successfully infiltrated the enemy. Requesting a line. Beep-boop, beep-boop."
He waited for a while, but received no reply.
He lifted a corner of the bedsheet and grinned. Just as he'd expected: once he put on his Invisibility Cloak, no one could see him. He scanned the area to make sure it was safe, then tucked his "communication device" back into his waistband.
Uchiha Sen spotted a park bench and charged at its backrest, pushing off hard and leaping into the air.
Then he fell headfirst, as luck would have it, striking his head on a rock.
Naruto, who had been following him the whole way, saw it happen.
"Oh no!"
When Uchiha Sen woke up again, he was in a hospital room. Night had fallen outside the window.
[Beep! System successfully activated. The host must complete missions to unlock the progress bar. Once the progress bar is complete, the worlds of the heavens will be unlocked. Scanning host's physical condition: severe mental illness, severe persecutory delusions, intermittent behavioral dysfunction. Would you like to receive treatment?]
Uchiha Sen rubbed his eyes and shook his head, completely ignoring the azure system panel before him.
"Just as I thought. The ants on this planet have noticed the great Cybertronian warrior. They even ambushed me from behind. Despicable and shameless, with no honor!"
[Would the host like to receive treatment?]
"You're the crazy one! Your whole family's crazy, for seventeen generations! Get lost, you're blocking me from absorbing the sun and moon's essence!"
[Treatment failed!]
Uchiha Sen cautiously surveyed his surroundings. Once he was sure no one was there, he sat cross-legged to cultivate. Footsteps sounded in the hallway from time to time.
They kept Uchiha Sen from fully immersing himself in his cultivation, so he strained his ears to listen for movement outside the room.
On the other side of the village, in a shadowy underground chamber, Shimura Danzō spoke, his body wrapped head to toe in bandages:
"He's pretending to be crazy and fooling everyone else, but he can't fool me! Bring him here."
"Yes, sir!"
The ninja wearing an eagle mask leaped out of Root.
It was after the night of the massacre. Of the once-mighty Uchiha Clan, only two people had survived: the second young master, Sasuke Uchiha, and Uchiha Sen, a severely mentally ill man who had arrived from another world. The Third Hokage had settled the two of them somewhere safe to limit the fallout from the incident, but Danzo wasn't satisfied with that. He also suspected Uchiha Sen's identity.
A few minutes later, in the hospital room.
"Uchiha Sen, Lord Danzo wants you to come with me." Eagle Nine clung to the eaves with his feet, hanging upside down on the windowsill. His arms were crossed, and his tone left no room for refusal.
[System scan]
[Aburame Zhiheng, male, Chunin. Specializes in Water Release Ninjutsu and Insect Secret Technique. Ordered by Shimura Danzō to take the host back to Root. Assessing host's strength and analyzing danger level: extremely high. Strongly recommend that the host make a disturbance to attract the Anbu Ninja hidden nearby and get rescued.]
After waiting a long while without a reply, Eagle Nine grew impatient. He stared straight at Uchiha Sen, and the room filled with murderous tension.
[Best recommendation: smash the lamp beside you]
A madman's thoughts were never the same as a normal person's.
"Why are you glaring at me? You dare look down on the bravest warrior on the planet!"
Uchiha Sen pointed at Eagle Nine outside the window and cursed:
"So you're Zhiheng, huh? Don't think I won't do anything to you just because you're a woman. Once I get out of here, I'll beat you every time I see you. Still glaring? You old bastard, just you wait! I'll teach you a lesson!"
[It's Aburame Zhiheng, not "a woman named Zhiheng." And why are you provoking him?!]
Eagle Nine didn't want to waste any more time. He pushed open the window, flipped inside, and landed steadily. With a turn of his hands, two Kunai appeared in them.
He blurred forward in a thrust, the Kunai gleaming coldly as he aimed straight for Uchiha Sen's vitals.
[Danger alert. Host, dodge to the left immediately.]
Uchiha Sen raised his left hand and stuck his middle finger into Eagle Nine's nostril. At the same time, his right hand snatched up the slipper hidden under his pillow.
"You despicable local muggle, you freak! Back in my day, I could take on ten guys like you!"
Eagle Nine's breathing grew noticeably heavier. Red veins filled his eyes, and the veins on his forehead bulged. Lord Danzo had only told him to bring the man in. A few injuries wouldn't matter. Who would care about some Uchiha idiot?
That's right. He was angry.
He was going to teach this brat, who didn't know his place, a lesson.
He tossed aside the Kunai and clenched both fists. His punches whistled through the air as he charged toward Uchiha Sen's head.
[In keeping with the principle of strengthening the host, the system is temporarily granting the host one minute of Super-Kage Level strength. Host, please—never mind.]
Uchiha Sen swung the slipper backhanded. Eagle Nine scoffed. At that speed, it wouldn't even touch him—
In that instant, the system's one-minute boost to Super-Kage strength surged through Uchiha Sen's body. The hand that had seemed to rise at a snail's pace now moved too fast to leave a shadow.
"How is that possible?!"
"Whoosh!"
"Smack!"
The slipper hit Eagle Nine's cheek with a deafening bang like a cannon blast. The force was immense, sending him flying straight out the window.
"Thud."
Eagle Nine lay on the lawn below, his mind completely blank.
Who was I? Where was I? What had I come here to do?
[Danger cleared. Energy withdrawn.]
The doctor pushed open the door and warily switched on the light. Uchiha Sen was curled up under the covers.
"Uchiha Sen, what are you doing?"
A little head peeked out from under the blanket, wearing an innocent smile.
"I didn't do anything."
The doctor didn't dare linger. Everyone in the Hidden Leaf Village knew this fellow didn't seem right in the head. He closed the door and hurried away, thinking it was better not to get involved.
The room fell quiet again. Once he was sure no one was around, another string of sounds came from under the covers.
"Hole-Hole Monster calling Blue Star Headquarters. The greatest warrior on the planet has successfully repelled the enemy, but I'm still in danger. I'll find another chance to contact Headquarters. Beep-boop, beep-boop."
Hokage Office Building
"You're saying that fellow was hiding his strength?"
The Third Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi, furrowed his brows in confusion. As far as he could remember, Uchiha Sen spent all day playing bizarre games with that brat Naruto.
"Yes, Third Hokage. Root's Eagle Nine, a Chunin, appears to have been sent flying by an immense force. Our investigation found that only Eagle Nine and Uchiha Sen were in the room at the time."
A glint flashed in Hiruzen Sarutobi's eyes. He gathered chakra and looked at the Crystal Ball on his desk.
"Beep-boop, beep-boop..."
[Beep! Someone is secretly observing the host. They mean no harm... The system will not retaliate.]
"This..."
As he watched Uchiha Sen hide under the covers and make strange noises, the Third Hokage fell into thought...
"Reporting, Lord Third. Lord Danzo is waiting outside."
Before you continue