"A girl in her teens, even one with the Sharingan, couldn't cause me any trouble."
Madara's tone was mild. "Go."
"Yes."
Black Zetsu withdrew from the cave.
Once outside the fissure, he slithered swiftly across the ground and soon found his target—
A White Zetsu Clone lay sunning himself on a nearby hillside.
Black Zetsu merged with him, and White Zetsu abruptly sat up.
This White Zetsu was different from the others.
The others were quiet. This one never stopped talking.
"Oh-ho! Lord Black Zetsu! You finally came to find me!
I knew you would! Did you see that tree on your way here?
There was a bird in it, singing beautifully, but I couldn't understand what it was saying. Lord Black Zetsu, can you understand birdsong?"
"Tobi... shut up!"
"Got it! I'll shut up! But Lord Black Zetsu, can I ask you something?"
"Ask." Black Zetsu felt his soft body beginning to stiffen.
"What does Bowel Urge feel like?"
Black Zetsu fell silent, as if questioning whether his hearing had malfunctioned.
"...What did you say?"
"Bowel Urge!" White Zetsu sounded utterly serious. "I've watched humans. Sometimes they suddenly clutch their stomachs and run into a little room, then come out looking relieved.
I asked the other White Zetsu, but none of them knew.
Lord Black Zetsu, you've lived for so many years that you must know everything. So I wanted to ask: what exactly does Bowel Urge feel like?"
Black Zetsu wanted to sew his mouth shut.
"...We don't have digestive systems. We don't get Bowel Urge."
"Oh—that's such a shame." White Zetsu drew out the words, a hint of disappointment in his voice. "Then what's the point of being alive?"
"Shut up. Move."
"Where to?"
"Konoha."
"Konoha!" White Zetsu perked up at once. "I heard the Dango there