Something's Wrong, I'm Getting Shorter

Early morning.

The alarm rang twice.

Chen De sat up in bed.

He did not sleep in.

He did not struggle.

He did not even curse at the alarm.

Because the first thing he did every morning after waking up had become a fixed routine.

It took priority over brushing his teeth.

It was more urgent than drinking water.

—Looking in the mirror.

He walked into the bathroom and stood before the sink.

He took a deep breath.

He looked up.

The person in the mirror looked at him.

He looked at the person in the mirror.

Then both of them fell silent at the same time.

"My hair grew back again."

Chen De's voice was very calm.

He had gotten it cut just yesterday.

It had cost thirty yuan.

Tony had even complimented him on his nice head shape.

One night had passed.

That clean, sharp black short hair had become shoulder-length hair.

It had not "grown a little longer."

It had gone straight from a buzz cut to medium-length hair.

It was ridiculous.

What was even more ridiculous was the ends.

The tips had taken on a faint gray tint.

It was not the white hair from his transformation.

It was the kind of beautiful gray gradient.

So pretty that if he posted it on social media, the comments would definitely be full of, "Sis, please share the dye formula."

Chen De shifted his gaze from his hair to his face.

His features had softened again.

It was not "slightly softer."

It was enough that cosmetics counter attendants would stop him on the street and ask, "Miss, would you like to try our new foundation?"

His skin was so pale it practically glowed.

His eyelashes had grown by at least two millimeters.

His eyes seemed to have gotten a little bigger too.

If his Adam's apple had not still been barely visible—

Anyone would have thought he was simply a girl with somewhat heroic-looking features and above-average height.

If he made videos, he could definitely become a top beauty influencer.

Titles like "Putting on makeup before heading out" would easily get millions of views.

Chen De stared at himself in the mirror for a full ten seconds.

His expression changed from calm to grave.

From grave to panicked.

From panicked to—

"Something's wrong!"

As if he had remembered something, he abruptly turned and rushed out of the bathroom.

He began tearing through the place.

The bedside table.

The drawers.

The wardrobe.

Under the sofa.

Under the coffee table.

On top of the shoe cabinet.

He made enough noise to sound like he was renovating.

Qubi appeared behind him with a yawn and perched on the edge of the sink.

"What are you looking for now? Scissors?"

"A measuring tape."

Without looking back, Chen De kept searching.

Qubi's ears twitched.

"A measuring tape?"

"Yes, a measuring tape. The kind for measuring things."

"I know what a measuring tape is. I'm asking what you're measuring."

"My height."

Qubi fell silent for two seconds.

"Weren't you one seventy-five yesterday?"

"That was yesterday."

Chen De's voice came muffled from deep inside the wardrobe.

"I felt like my eye level was lower this morning."

"Lower by how much?"

"I'm not sure, which is why I need to measure it."

Qubi jumped onto the coffee table and tilted his head.

"How could you tell your eye level was lower?"

"The sink."

Chen De backed out of the wardrobe, holding a dusty flexible measuring tape.

"When I used to stand in front of the sink, the top edge of the mirror was right above my forehead."

"Today, it's above my head."

"That's at least two or three centimeters of difference."

Qubi blinked.

"Maybe you remembered wrong."

"I didn't."

Chen De flicked the measuring tape open and stood straight against the wall.

"Help me check the markings."

"I'm a cat. How am I supposed to help you check the markings?"

"You're a higher-dimensional life-form."

"When necessary, I'm a cat."

"Right now is when I need you not to be a cat!"

Gritting his teeth, Chen De pressed the tape against the wall with one hand, touched the top of his head with the other, and dug a mark into the wall with his fingernail.

Then he crouched down to check the measurement.

He was silent for five seconds.

"One seventy-three."

Qubi's tail swayed.

"That's two centimeters off one seventy-five, within the margin of error."

"This isn't an error!"

Chen De stood up, his face filled with a sense of crisis.

"I measured yesterday. I was one seventy-four point five."

"Today, I'm one seventy-three."

"I shrank one and a half centimeters in a day."

"You measured yesterday?"

"I told you, checking is the first thing I do every morning."

Qubi looked at him with a complicated expression.

"You measure your height every morning after getting up?"

"Yes."

"Like a pregnant woman weighing herself?"

"That analogy is extremely inappropriate."

"But very vivid."

Chen De took a deep breath and wrapped the tape around his hand.

"Qubi, you said before that the changes to my appearance would gradually stabilize."

"Yes."

"Will my height stabilize too?"

"Theoretically, it will."

"At what height?"

Qubi hesitated for a moment.

"How tall are you after transforming?"

"Around one fifty."

"Your real-world form will stabilize at the midpoint between your original body and magical girl form."

Chen De did the math in his head at lightning speed.

"One seventy-five plus one fifty, divided by two..."

"One sixty-two point five?"

"Approximately."

Chen De stared at Qubi.

Qubi stared at Chen De.

The air was silent for a full three seconds.

"One sixty-two."

"Approximately."

"I'm shrinking from one seventy-five to one sixty-two."

"That's the final stable value. You probably won't change anymore after that."

"Do you think that's comforting?!"

Chen De slapped the measuring tape onto the table.

"Do you know what it means for a one-sixty-two guy to walk down the street?!"

"With your current appearance, people will only think you're a one-sixty-two girl."

"That's even more ridiculous!"

Chen De began pacing back and forth through the living room.

"Wait, you said before that the stabilization period would be around one or two months."

"Yes."

"That means within one or two months, I'll shrink from one seventy-three to one sixty-two."

"Probably a little each day. Slowly."

"You make it sound like I'm doing yoga!"

Qubi licked his paw.

"You can wear height-increasing insoles."

Chen De stopped walking.

"Height-increasing insoles?"

"Yes, lots of people wear them."

"That's your solution for me? Height-increasing insoles?"

"What else? Do you want me to cast a height-increasing spell?"

"Can you?"

"No."

"Then why bring it up!"

Chen De dropped onto the sofa and held his head in both hands.

"Qubi."

"Yeah."

"I'm 1.73 meters tall now, my face looks like this, and my hair is this long."

"I still have to go to school today."

"Tell me, how am I supposed to explain this to my classmates?"

Qubi thought for a moment.

"You could say you've been losing weight."

"Does losing weight make you shorter?"

"You could say you've been stretching."

"Does stretching make people shorter?"

"You could say you switched shampoos."

"Would switching shampoos make your hair grow to your shoulders overnight? With an ombré color, too?"

Qubi's stockpile of solutions seemed to have run dry.

"Then you can wear a hat."

Chen De lowered his head and looked at the hat on the coffee table, the one he had worn yesterday.

He picked it up and put it on.

His hair spilled out from both sides of the brim.

Shoulder-length gray ombré hair paired with a black baseball cap.

No matter how he looked at the reflection in the mirror, he looked like a cool girl.

"The hat doesn't cover it."

"What if you tie it up?"

Chen De froze for a moment.

"Tie it up?"

"Yeah, make a ponytail and tuck it into the hat."

"I'm a guy. You want me to wear a ponytail?"

"With how you look now, a ponytail would actually be the least out-of-place option."

Chen De opened his mouth, only to realize he had no way to argue.

He rummaged through the drawer for ages before finding a black hair tie from who knew where.

Standing before the mirror, he clumsily gathered his hair behind his head.

He tied it three times.

It came loose three times.

"You don't even know how to tie your hair?"

"I used to have short hair! Do short haircuts need tying?"

"You can look up a tutorial online."

"Search for what? 'How do boys tie ponytails'?"

"That search term is indeed a little awkward."

Chen De tried for the fourth time.

At last, he barely managed to secure it.

It was crooked and messy, but at least it did not come loose.

He tucked the ponytail into the hat and put it on properly.

Then he looked in the mirror.

"How is it?"

"You can still tell your hair is long."

"At least it's better than leaving it down."

"Your standards are way too low."

Chen De looked at himself in the mirror again.

The hat pressed down on his hair and the ponytail was hidden, but the changes to his face could not be concealed at all.

His skin was fair, his features delicate, and his eyelashes looked fake they were so long.

"Qubi."

"Yeah."

"What if Jiang Ping says I'm pretty again today?"

"You can say thank you."

"What if he says I look like a girl?"

"You can hit him."

"What if hitting him just makes him more certain?"

"Then run."

Chen De felt like his life was falling apart in a way it never had before.

He reached out and touched his Adam's apple.

It was still there.

He could still feel it.

It was not as obvious as before, but it was definitely still there.

This was his last line of defense.

"Qubi."

"What now?"

"Will my Adam's apple disappear?"

Qubi was silent for a long time.

So long that Chen De's heartbeat sped up.

"It won't disappear completely."

"You used the word 'completely.'"

"It'll become less noticeable."

"How much less noticeable?"

"To the point where you can't tell unless you touch it."

Chen De closed his eyes.

He lowered his hand from his Adam's apple.

"Qubi."

"Yeah."

"I regret becoming a magical girl."

"You certainly didn't sound like that when you were fighting disasters for money."