A Complete Home Makeover?

The barbershop.

Chen De sat in the swivel chair. The moment he took off his hat, he clearly saw the barber's hand pause.

It had only been a fraction of a second.

But Chen De caught it.

It was the subtle expression of, "I've seen plenty of ridiculous things, but yours really pushed the limits."

Then the barber said nothing and picked up a comb to section his hair.

He remained silent the whole time.

Professional.

Calm.

Twenty minutes later.

Chen De stared at himself in the mirror and froze.

"This... was salvageable?"

The barber untied the cape and brushed the loose hairs from Chen De's shoulders.

"More or less. But you really don't have much hair left, and you cut off too much on the left side. I could only make it shorter."

"Does it look all right overall?"

"It's fine. Clean and neat, just a little thin."

Chen De looked himself over in the mirror from side to side.

It was definitely a hundred times better than what he had done himself.

At least it no longer looked like a dog had chewed on it.

At worst, it looked like a more particular dog had chewed on it.

"How much?"

"Thirty."

Chen De took out his phone and scanned the code.

Thirty yuan for a miraculous recovery.

It was the best money he had spent all day.

After leaving the barbershop, Chen De touched the back of his head. It felt pretty good.

Qubi lay on his shoulder, its emerald-green eyes sweeping over the surroundings.

"I thought the barber would laugh at you."

"So did I."

"But he kept a straight face the entire time."

"Maybe that was professional ethics."

"I think he's just seen it too many times and gotten used to it."

Chen De fell silent for two seconds.

"You mean people often go get haircuts with hairstyles like mine?"

"You underestimate the destructive power of humans doing things themselves."

"...Fine. I guess that's comforting."

Chen De walked a few steps, then suddenly felt that the weight on his shoulder was off.

It was lighter.

Noticeably lighter.

He glanced sideways.

Then stopped.

"Qubi."

"Hmm?"

"Why did you shrink?"

Qubi was now only half its usual size.

The white cat had not been large to begin with, but now it looked like a plush toy.

Sitting on his shoulder, it did not look out of place at all.

"Basic operation."

Qubi's tone was flat.

Chen De stared at it.

"You could do this all along?"

"I've always been able to."

"Then why didn't you shrink at home before?"

"Why would I shrink at home? Even jumping onto the sofa would be difficult."

Chen De was too tired to complain.

"I never realized you could change size anywhere."

"What do you mean, change size anywhere? You make it sound like I poop anywhere."

Chen De reached out and poked Qubi's tiny shrunken head.

Qubi's ears twitched.

"Don't touch me randomly. My dignity has limits."

"You have dignity my ass. When you tricked me into signing that contract, you fed your limits to the dogs."

Ignoring its protest, Chen De took out his phone and opened his notes app.

On the screen was a shopping list comparable to moving house.

It was packed full.

"Next, I'm replacing my phone."

"You can get the best one. You have one hundred and sixty thousand, after all."

"No. I need to spend rationally. One hundred and sixty thousand looks like a lot, but in times like these, who knows when food might run out?"

Chen De stared at his phone screen as he walked.

"Besides, if I buy a ten-thousand-yuan phone and crush it when I transform, who am I supposed to cry to?"

Qubi leaned over, sticking its little head in front of the screen.

It read line by line.

Phone ×1

Mattress ×1

Electric blanket ×1

Pillow ×1

Quilt ×1

Slippers ×2

Pot ×1

Kitchen knife ×1

Cutting board ×1

Various seasonings

Rice ×1 bag

Thermos ×1

Trash can ×1

Towels ×3

Toothbrushes ×2

Laundry detergent ×1

Clothes hangers ×several

Qubi finished reading.

It fell silent for three seconds.

"How is this any different from renovating your entire home?"

"It is different. At least I'm not replacing the tiles."

"The tiles in your home really should be replaced too."

"Shut up. Don't add to my budget."

Chen De put his phone away.

"These are all basic necessities. I used to live too roughly."

"You didn't used to live roughly. You simply weren't living at all."

"It means about the same thing."

"It means very different things. One means your quality of life was low; the other means you had no quality of life at all."

"Now that I have money, what's wrong with upgrading a little?"

"Nothing. It's just that the length of this shopping list reminds me of a freshman's packing list for school."

"Those magical girls don't buy this stuff after making money?"

"They already have these things at home."

"..."

Chen De was silent for a while.

"Right. Normal households really do have all this stuff."

"You're not normal."

"Thanks for the reminder."

They reached the phone store.

Chen De pushed the door open and went inside.

There were not many people in the store. A clerk came over and gave him a quick once-over.

"Looking for a phone?"

"Replacing mine."

"Do you have a budget?"

Chen De thought for a moment.

"Around two thousand."

The clerk's expression visibly relaxed, and his enthusiasm rose from seventy to eighty-five.

Chen De looked around the counter.

"How about this one?"

The clerk pointed at a phone.

Chen De picked it up and turned it over in his hands.

It felt good. The screen was large enough. The processor was not the newest, but it was sufficient.

"How much?"

"One thousand nine hundred and ninety-nine."

"Can it be cheaper?"

"At most, I can throw in a phone case."

"What kind of phone case?"

The clerk took one out from beneath the counter.

It was pink.

A cartoon cat was printed on it.

Chen De looked down at Qubi on his shoulder.

Qubi looked down at the phone case.

The man and cat fell silent at the same time.

"Do you have another color?"

"There's black too."

"I'll take the black one."

Deal.

After transferring his data, Chen De slipped the new phone into his pocket.

He did not throw away his old phone either, stuffing it into another pocket as a backup.

After leaving the phone store, he took out his new phone and swiped through it a couple of times.

Smooth.

Bright screen.

Good feel.

Compared with his previous seven-hundred-yuan phone, it was like trading a tractor for a sedan.

"Now this feels good."

"A phone alone makes you this happy?"

"You don't understand. Typing on that temporary one was miserable."

"You don't even have many people to chat with."

"...Can you stop stabbing me in the heart at times like this?"

Qubi flicked its tail and ignored him.

Chen De opened the contacts on his new phone.

They were either sales calls or scams.

At the very top was the unfamiliar number that had texted him last night.

He stared at the number for two seconds.

"Qubi, should I save this number?"

"Whatever you want."

"What should I put as the note if I save it?"

"You're asking me?"

"Didn't you say her figure was better than mine? You should know her better than I do."

"I meant you after transforming. That has nothing to do with how you are now."

"That just makes me even madder."

After thinking for a moment, Chen De saved the number under "Unknown Origin."

Simple and brutal.

Next stop: the home goods store.

As Chen De pushed his cart inside, a long-lost feeling welled up in him.

It felt like going to the supermarket with his family when he was little.

He wanted everything.

Everything seemed necessary.

He headed straight for the mattress section.

A row of mattresses was laid out there, ranging from eight hundred to eight thousand.

Chen De sat down on a mattress priced at twelve hundred.

His butt sank into it.

Soft.

Supportive.

No hard spots.

Then he lay down.

"Qubi."

"Yeah."

"I might not be able to get up."

"You've been lying there for three seconds."

"That's enough. These three seconds have already surpassed the combined experience of four years on my old mattress."

"Can you have a little more ambition?"

"Good sleep quality is the prerequisite for ambition, and a good mattress is the prerequisite for good sleep quality."

"You used that logic last time too."

"Because it actually makes sense."

Chen De climbed off the mattress.

At that moment, even the back that Fierce Calamity had sent flying into an iron pillar did not hurt anymore.

"This one! Have it delivered to my door, as soon as possible!"

He sprang off the mattress, moving as briskly as an office worker who had just received a year-end bonus.

The saleswoman at the furniture store smiled so hard she could not close her mouth. It was probably her first time seeing a young man buy a mattress with the same extravagance as buying cabbages.

Over the next hour, Chen De fully entered "revenge spending" mode.

He also picked up a frying pan and a set of ceramic knives.

"You don't even know how to cook. Why are you buying that stuff?"

Qubi mercilessly called him out.

"I can learn if I don't know how. Besides, even if all I do is fry eggs, shouldn't I use a good pan?"

"This is called respecting the ingredients. Even an egg that costs fifty cents deserves to live in a two-hundred-yuan pan."

Chen De muttered to himself as he swept through the supermarket section.

Laundry detergent, hangers, towels, toothbrushes—he even bought a case of the pure milk he normally could not bear to drink.

The cart was stuffed full.

Chen De looked at the cart piled into a small mountain and did the math.

Everything had cost a little over four thousand.

"Over four thousand." Chen De said the number aloud.

"Does it hurt?"

"No, I'm just reflecting."

"Reflecting on what?"

"I made one hundred and twenty thousand from killing a Fierce Calamity, then spent a little over four thousand upgrading my place from an unfinished shell to fully furnished."

"You call that fully furnished?"

"For me, it is."

Qubi shifted positions on his shoulder.

"Do you know what other magical girls can do with over four thousand?"

"What?"

"Buy a secondhand beginner-level magical power recovery tool."

"One secondhand tool costs over four thousand?"

"That's beginner-level. Normal ones cost over ten thousand."

Chen De pushed the cart toward the checkout counter.

"Then don't they buy daily necessities?"

"They already have everything at home."

"..."

"You're the only magical girl who needs to furnish a home from scratch."

"Don't call me a magical girl."

"Magical boy?"

"Not that either."

"Then what should I call you?"

"Just call me by my name."

"Chen De."

"What?"

"A pack of hangers fell out of your cart."

Chen De looked down.

Several hangers really had rolled out from beneath the cart.

He bent down, picked them up, and stuffed them back in.

After checking out, there was too much to carry.

He arranged delivery for the mattress and bedding.

He carried the rest himself.

With three or four bags in each hand, he looked like he had just restocked from a wholesale market as he walked down the street.

Qubi curled up on his shoulder, very close to the plastic handles of the bags.

"The plastic handles are rubbing against me."

"Bear with it."

"Can you switch me to your other shoulder?"

"There are bags on my left shoulder too."

"Then could you buy less?"

"I already bought less. I still wanted to buy a bookshelf."

"Do you have books?"

"No."

"Then why buy a bookshelf?"

"To put stuff on."

"That's called a storage rack."

"Same thing."

Qubi fell silent.

The wind blew by, making the plastic bags rustle.