What Kind of Path Has Those Bullshit Rules? / The Result of Two Chaotic Alignments Getting Together-

"Mash, crew member, call me Captain!"

Bai Ming raised his mug high with one hand. "Men, strike up the musical!"

"Senpai!"

Mash felt utterly exhausted, but she turned around and joined the pirates' musical anyway.

After all, Mash had never really experienced anything like this. Getting to be a pirate was probably something she would never encounter again in her life.

"So!"

Mash spoke up. "Could we deal with the problem at hand first?"

"Easy!" Bai Ming clinked glasses with the pirates, then said, "Men, are there any islands nearby where we can restock?"

"Yes!"

The pirates all started talking at once. "To be honest, since water and supplies are getting a little tight, we were planning to head to a nearby pirate island to restock!"

"A pirate island... wouldn't there be a lot of pirates there... Ah! Senpai! I'm underage, I can't drink!"

Seeing the cup Bai Ming handed over, Mash immediately scolded him seriously. "Please protect minors properly!"

Even so, she still took the beer mug from Bai Ming and took a small sip.

"Mash, what are you overthinking for? If Galahad had dared talk to me like that, he and his father would already be buried in the ground with only their heads sticking out."

"Huh?"

Bai Ming completely ignored Mash, who was still processing what he had just said. "Men, perk up and prepare to head for Pirate Island! Strike up the music!"

"Yeah!!! Yo-ho-ho~?"

Filled with helplessness, Mash finally connected to Chaldea's communications. "So... Doctor Roman, can you tell me why Senpai is so skilled and natural at being a pirate?"

Roman: "Huh? Him? A pirate? Isn't he a bandit who leaves not a blade of grass wherever he goes?"

Mash: "Huh? A bandit?"

The pirate ship approached Pirate Island.

Bai Ming shouted, "Men, prepare to restock supplies and conquer the seas!" Then he leaped straight over the rail.

"Hey, Senpai, this is Pirate Island!" Mash shouted. "Wouldn't it be terrible if we started fighting?"

Still shouting, Mash jumped over the rail after Bai Ming.

"What kind of joke are you making, kid? These are pirates! Are you expecting them to reason with you? When this group of pirates, who haven't seen a woman all year, sees a girl with fair skin, a cute face, a full chest, and a perky backside like you, what do you think they'll do? Like this!"

As Bai Ming spoke, he slapped Mash's chest with a smack. Mash cried out with a flushed face, "Eek!"

After landing, Mash said indignantly, "I could have imagined that even if you didn't say it! There was absolutely no need to demonstrate!" Then she used the round cross-shaped shield in her hand to smack away the pirate shouting, "A woman! Hunt her!"

"Mash, you were too gentle."

Bai Ming rolled his neck, then dragged the pirate away and threw him into the sea. He said sternly, "Mash! Tell me what pirates are!"

"Yes! Pirates are bandits who rob merchant ships and coastal towns at sea. Their nature is the same as bandits active on land: evil people who commit every atrocity imaginable, including murder, arson, plunder, rape, and worse! If possible, I hope Senpai is not the bandit Doctor Roman described!"

"Hah? Beat them all up first. If they refuse to submit, beat them twice. If they still refuse, then third time's the limit—break their limbs and throw them into the sea to drown. Your mercy toward them is their cruelty toward you!"

"Yes!"

Though something about this felt strange, Mash believed her Senpai was doing it for her sake. So she grabbed her shield and charged forward. As a Demi-Servant, taking on a group of pirates was more than easy for her, so Bai Ming merely watched quietly as Mash faced the pirates with her shield.

When Mash had nearly subdued every enemy, Bai Ming remarked, "As expected, Mash's butt really is nice." Then he walked toward her and shouted, "Leave one conscious for questioning. This is Duke Joslyn's interrogation class now. If he refuses to reveal even the slightest information, strip off his pants and use his thing to feed the fish."

Before Bai Ming even arrived, his voice had reached them. The final pirate saw Mash take down dozens of men by herself without even breaking a sweat, and he was scared out of his wits. He wailed, "Wah! No! Don't do that! I'll tell you anything!"

"Oh? You really will tell me anything?"

Bai Ming's tone was full of amusement. Mash complained, "Please don't ask him difficult math problems or anything like that. No matter how you look at it, that isn't something a pirate like this could solve—"

"Am I that bored?"

Chapter 60: What Kind of Path Has Those Bullshit Rules?

After briefly questioning the terrified pirate, Mash and Bai Ming waited for their pirate ship to dock at the shore of Pirate Island.

While waiting, Mash silently shut off her communication with Chaldea and asked with a blushing face, "Senpai, just now... um..."

"What is it?"

"N-Nothing!"

Mash shook her head. She really wanted to ask what it had felt like when Senpai slapped her chest, but the secretly lustful girl ultimately did not ask the things in her mind that were not quite suitable to say aloud.

Because she liked her Senpai, Mash would do her best to fulfill any request from him, even if she was unwilling. Just like earlier, when she had said, "Minors can't drink," but still accepted the cup and took a sip. The girl herself had not realized that she liked her Senpai, so she did not dare cross the boundary between them.

But Mash knew one thing very clearly—whether Senpai wanted it or not, she should stay by his side.

As Bai Ming watched the pirates of the Chaldea Pirate Crew gradually approach, he wrapped an arm around Mash's shoulders and headed deeper into the island. "Let's go. Men, restock properly. I'm going to find Francis Drake."

"S-Senpai, you're too close!"

Mash's cheeks were burning red, while Bai Ming looked completely unconcerned. "This is declaring ownership! It tells these pirates, whose eyes are like exhaust vents, that you're mine. Otherwise, it'd be annoying to fight all the way there."

"I-I suppose...?"

Mash did not really understand. She only felt her heart beating rapidly and her cheeks burning.

"Mash, you're blushing."

"I-It's because Senpai is too close, so it's too hot! We should... we should hurry and find the legendary Francis Drake!" Mash stammered as she began explaining Drake's story from the middle of the Age of Exploration. Bai Ming patiently listened to her.

Soon, led by the only pirate who had not been knocked unconscious, the two passed through the forest and arrived at Francis Drake's "secluded residence." Looking at the sexy pink-haired woman with two round peaks on her chest, Mash could not help feeling inferior. The only flaw was the terrifying scar that slashed diagonally from Drake's forehead to her chin.

"Don't worry, Mash. Your beauty doesn't lie in those few pounds of flesh on your chest."

That said, Drake really was huge.

Bai Ming could not help taking a few more looks.

"So, who are you two? Looks like my idiots have received quite the 'care' from you."

Drake emphasized the word "care." Bai Ming rolled his wrist, while Mash hurriedly grabbed his sleeve. "Senpai, calm down. I'll handle the conversation! Hello, you are Francis Drake, correct? We are from an organization called Chaldea. My name is Mash Kyrielight, and this is my Master, Bai Ming."

"Hah? Chaldea? What does an astronomical organization want with me? Selling star charts?" Drake fired off four complaints in a row before asking, "Forget that. What did you come here for?"

"In short, to correct the distortions that have appeared in this era," Bai Ming said. "Drake, you must have already noticed that something is wrong with this era. That this sea is not the sea you once lived in."

"...Hmph."

Drake snorted. "I was going to ignore your problem, but once you mentioned the sea, I can't just leave it alone. Even if you want to talk, I'm already drunk as mud. How about we raise some hell and sober me up first? Defeat Francis Drake first, or there's nothing to discuss."

The moment she finished speaking, Drake transformed into a pink whirlwind and flew out.

"Boss!" Some pirates ran toward her, while others surrounded Mash and Bai Ming. Bai Ming withdrew his fist. "Hah? I've lived this long, and this is the first time I've heard such a masochistic request."

Mash's mouth fell slightly open before she complained, "Senpai! Why are you acting recklessly again? Even doing whatever you want should have limits!"

"Ah, Mash." Bai Ming shook his hand. "What kind of path has those bullshit rules? I honor the path in my heart, so the limits you speak of simply don't exist!"

"Damn, you're one hell of a man!" Drake, who had not been very sober before, flipped herself up from the ground. That punch had sobered her up completely. "Want to come aboard my ship and be my man? I can completely ignore your little lover."

"Captain Drake, don't be so willful either!"

"Looks like your little lover likes you a lot. She's even jealous." Drake said, "Though we said we'd make a scene, let's keep it to sparring!"

"Go, Mash. Show her what you can do."

Bai Ming's words made Mash point at her own face in confusion. "Eh... me?"

"Using me as a whetstone, huh? Then come on! A splendid battle!"

The next moment, two gunshots rang out. Mash raised her shield to block Drake's bullets, then charged at her. Seeing Mash withstand her gunfire, Drake became interested and began fighting her at close quarters.

Since it was just fooling around, Drake called a stop once she felt it was enough.

"Wah... Senpai, Captain Drake is ridiculously strong. Is she really a living person?"

"Of course I'm alive." Drake looked at Bai Ming. "Well, kid? Want to fight me?"

Bai Ming shook his head. "There's no need for us to fight. Don't try to provoke me either. Aside from training, every fight I have is a fight to the death."

"Fine, fine~" Drake's smiling expression vanished. "I lost. Kill me, torture me, or hold me and do whatever you want—I'll leave it all to you!"

"I think Captain Drake's suggestion can completely—Senpai?!!"

Just as Mash was about to say that there was no need for that at all, Bai Ming had already hugged Drake once. Then they sat by the camp, each holding a cup of rum.

Mash stared at Drake's chest and sighed inwardly, overwhelmed by a sense of defeat. It's—It's deforming?! It's about to spill out from the pressure?!

"Anyway! A loss is a loss. Men, prepare some food to entertain our honored guests! Let's hear what you have to say."

After giving the order, Drake sighed like an older person who had repeatedly gone on blind dates only for every one of them to end in failure. "I don't know why, but I've never had much luck with men. I'm a woman too, you know? My figure isn't that bad, and I didn't have this scar from the beginning... Ah, thank you for the hug! Could it be that my standards are too high, and you're the only man I find pleasing? Well, but if I had a man, how could there still be a me of the seas?"

"Um... Senpai already..."

"Don't worry, I won't interfere with you lovers!" Drake clinked glasses with Bai Ming and drained her rum in one gulp. Mash explained, "Um, we're not lovers at all! Senpai, why aren't you denying it—"

Orderly Good Mash simply could not keep up with Chaotic Evil Drake's train of thought. Seeing Bai Ming nod only made her even more exhausted, but she quickly realized something was off.

It seemed that when Captain Drake had first called her Senpai's lover, Senpai had not denied it.

Huh? Senpai wants me to be his lover?

Chapter 61: The Result of Two Chaotic Alignments Getting Together—

After secretly lustful Mash realized that "Senpai wants her to be his lover," her thoughts inevitably began to slide downhill.

But just as she began imagining Bai Ming baring his muscular body, gripping her chin, and pinning her against a wall, the two Chaotic people, Drake and Bai Ming, had already begun discussing serious business.

Mash sighed inwardly. Her unhealthy little fantasy had ended the moment it began. It would be nice if I could really see Senpai naked.

By then, Bai Ming and Drake had already shared two drinks before he stated his request. Unable to get a word in, Mash could not help complaining inwardly, Is this the business drinking party working adults always talk about? Wah! It looks so exhausting!

As the alcohol kept going down, Drake came to a conclusion:

"So, you're looking for something, but you're unfamiliar with these waters, so you need my help—even though I'm a notorious pirate."

Drake smiled happily. She did not like unchanging lives, and such a sudden adventure would always leave her with unforgettable memories.

Bai Ming nodded. "Yes, but whether you're a pirate or not has nothing to do with it. It's only because you are the Star Pioneer of the middle Age of Exploration."

Drake did not take Bai Ming's words to heart.

Telling someone outright that it did not matter whether they were there or not, and that only their identity mattered, was quite hurtful.

But it was precisely Bai Ming's blunt way of speaking and decisive style of acting that made her favor him.

Drake teased, "Ah~ I thought you would say something cool, like, 'We need Francis Drake.' But since I lost, as long as you don't take my life, I'll do anything you want~"

To stop her Senpai from saying anything outrageous, Mash immediately took over. "I would like to know where we are right now. What exactly is the situation in these waters?"

"Ah~ Sorry~"

Drake threw an arm around Bai Ming's shoulders and drank another cup with him before explaining, "Actually, I have no idea where this place is either."

Mash was immediately astonished and asked skeptically, "You don't know anything, yet you're making such a fuss?"

Bai Ming stood up, pulled Mash to his side, and said, "Well, Drake obviously lives for the moment!"

"Exactly!"

Drake nodded in agreement. "There's no shortage of food or alcohol, and since I lost to you, I'm your companion from now on! Three, two, one, bottoms up!"

"Eh! Wait, wait, wait—You can't!"

Mash felt a somewhat improper sense of shame at this beginning of indulgence—partly because she was naturally reserved despite her hidden lustfulness, and partly because her upbringing had taught her that enjoying herself in the moment was the wrong choice.

But seeing Bai Ming and Drake linking shoulders, singing while drinking, Mash ultimately chose to sit beside them and peacefully drink juice.

From daytime until dusk, Mash's peaceful expression finally turned miserable.

"Look at that frown. Treasure will run away from someone like you!" Seeing Mash's unhappy face, Bai Ming immediately tried to comfort her. "Smile~ Smile~"

Drake burst out laughing. "Yo, I didn't expect you to understand so well, Master! Come to think of it, you've been staring at my cup while drinking. Could it be that you want to kiss me?"

Little Eggplant immediately bristled and shouted, "Senpai would never do something like that! Kissing a woman he only just met! No, no, since you said you would help us, listen to the situation properly! Senpai, don't just go along with her!"

"Ah, Mash, your life up until now must have been terribly miserable, to the point that you never learned when to relax and enjoy yourself and when to remain tense. Romani will pay for that remark."