As Long as You're Bold, the Hokage Gets Maternity Leave

The Fifth Hokage, Tsunade, personally arrived at Ichiraku Ramen, her oppressive presence terrifyingly heavy.

The once-noisy little shop instantly fell silent. The diners did not even bother carrying their noodles; they grabbed their things and rushed out in unison. Within seconds, only Naruto, Tsunade, and Uncle Teuchi, frozen behind the stove, remained.

Uncle Teuchi held the long chopsticks for boiling noodles, his hands stiff in midair. He did not dare breathe too loudly.

The Hokage had come personally to arrest someone. He had never seen such a spectacle in his life. All he could hope was that he could turn invisible and avoid getting dragged into this mess.

Tsunade strode up to Naruto's table, planted both hands on it, and stared down at his grease-smeared face. Her voice was urgent and irritable. "Naruto! No one in Team 7 ever lets me relax! I had just taken Sakura as my personal disciple, and Sasuke immediately defected!"

"I'm assigning you a pursuit mission right now. Go accept it immediately and bring Sasuke back! I believe you can do it!"

Naruto slowly finished chewing the char siu in his mouth, wiped the corner of his lips, and firmly shook his head. "I won't go. I advise you not to issue this mission at all."

Tsunade froze at once, her brows drawing together as she muttered inwardly, Could it be that the conditions he set when he and Jiraiya agreed to let me become Hokage still haven't been fulfilled? This brat is pushing his luck!

For some reason, her cheeks heated up. Her gaze darted away for a moment before she lowered her voice and spoke with both embarrassment and anger. "Don't push your luck! I already agreed to the arrangement between you and Jiraiya and became Hokage! Don't tell me... you're still thinking about that nonsense you said before, about wanting me to bear your child?"

Behind the stove, Uncle Teuchi was struck as though by lightning.

The long chopsticks in his hand clattered against the rim of the pot. Scalding noodle broth splashed onto the back of his hand, but he did not even notice.

Cold sweat poured down his forehead as he screamed inwardly, Holy shit! Is this the kind of secret an ordinary ramen shop owner like me is supposed to hear?!

I'm done for, I'm done for! After hearing something this private from the Hokage, will the ANBU silence me?!

Damn it, Naruto! You insisted on keeping me from closing just now, saying you wanted two more bowls of ramen. I knew that brat was up to no good! He's throwing me straight into the fire!

He wished he could bury his head in the stove and pretend he did not exist, but his body was too stiff to move. He could only keep his head bowed, even as his ears uncontrollably perked up.

Naruto raised his brow, a wicked smile curling his lips. His gaze swept openly over Tsunade as he answered frankly and seriously, "Why not?"

The moment those words came out, Tsunade's face flushed from her cheeks all the way to her ears, and even her neck turned crimson.

She abruptly straightened up, clenched and unclenched her hands, then stomped her foot in exasperation. Her high heel struck the floor with a dull thud. Too flustered to look Naruto in the eye, she scolded him in embarrassment and fury, "Naruto Uzumaki! How dare you!"

"I'm already so old. You... don't make such ridiculous jokes! Would you really like an old woman?"

Her thoughts were a complete mess, full of embarrassment, agitation, and an inexplicable panic.

After living for decades, this was the first time a junior had teased her so bluntly. Yet Naruto's gaze was open and straightforward, without the slightest hint of mockery or lechery. That only made her heart race, stripping her of all the usual dignity of a Hokage.

Uncle Teuchi's heart pounded wildly as he listened from behind them. More than half the noodle broth in his hand spilled as he frantically complained inwardly, I-I-I... I didn't hear anything! Please spare me, Lady Hokage! I'm just a noodle cook!

Please don't kill me! I'll close shop tomorrow and leave the Land of Fire! I'll never come back!

Seeing Tsunade all flustered and shy, Naruto's smile widened as he spoke earnestly. "You're not old. In my eyes, you're not old at all."

His words made Tsunade's heart tremble, throwing even her breathing into disarray. She sharply turned her head away and rubbed her burning cheeks, forcing herself to calm down before cutting him off sternly. "Enough! Stop changing the subject!"

"Now isn't the time for this. Sasuke's defection is the top priority. What exactly are you planning to do? Stop talking nonsense!"

She finally dragged her thoughts back to the matter at hand. Her eyes were full of anxiety. Sasuke's defection was a grave issue; one wrong move could trigger unrest throughout the Ninja World and plunge Konoha into a storm of public criticism.

Naruto's smile faded, and his expression turned solemn. He spoke slowly. "Sasuke defected because of his own choice. We should respect his decision."

"Not issuing a pursuit mission does not mean letting him go. It means leaving Sasuke and Itachi Uchiha a way to return to Konoha openly and honorably. Once we issue a wanted order, we'll completely push them to Konoha's opposing side. It'll be difficult for them to turn back after that."

"Besides, I think Itachi Uchiha has the potential to become Hokage. That job is so exhausting, and Grandma Tsunade works so hard already. It would make my heart ache!"

Ignoring Naruto's teasing, Tsunade immediately refuted him, her tone firm. "Absurd! Defection is defection. How can there be any reason to leave them a way out? Itachi Uchiha is a missing-nin of Konoha. His return is already impossible, let alone that nonsense you just said about making him Hokage. That's utterly ridiculous!"

"A missing-nin becoming Hokage? What would the Ninja World think of Konoha? The Elders' Council and the villagers would never agree either!"

Naruto countered in a deep voice, his reasoning clear. "Konoha was founded by the Senju Clan and the Uchiha Clan. Only when the Senju and Uchiha stand together is Konoha complete. After all these years, has Konoha not wronged the Uchiha Clan enough?"

"Allowing a capable and responsible missing-nin to return, even entrusting him with an important position, is not compromise. It shows Konoha's magnanimity! Itachi Uchiha's strategy, strength, and patient sacrifices for Konoha make him far more suited for the Hokage's position than those old fools who only know how to fight for power!"

"He never truly betrayed Konoha. He merely carried too much on his shoulders. What we should do is not force him into a dead end, but give him a clean identity and an opportunity to return to Konoha. That is the kind of vision a Hokage should have."

Tsunade was stunned. Her brows remained tightly furrowed as she fell into thought.

Every word Naruto said struck at the heart of the matter.

She had been too fixated on Konoha's rules and the Ninja World's opinion, forgetting Konoha's original purpose and forgetting that the Uchiha Clan should have been one of Konoha's foundations.

After a moment of silence, she had to admit Naruto was right. Still, she frowned. "I understand the reasoning, but even if we intend to let the brothers return someday, Konoha needs an explanation. We can't simply let a missing-nin leave for no reason and wait for him to come back, can we? There has to be a reasonable excuse to shut everyone up."

The two fell silent at the same time, each lowering their heads in thought.

Naruto stroked his chin as name after name flashed through his mind. Tsunade rested her cheek on one hand, brows tightly knit as she considered suitable candidates.

Less than three seconds passed.

They both looked up at once. Their gazes met, identical sparks of realization flashing in their eyes as they shouted the same name together:

"Danzo!"

"Danzo of Root!"

As soon as the words fell, they exchanged smiles and instantly reached an understanding.

For thirty years of professional blame-taking, no one fit better than Danzo!

Sasuke's defection had all been secretly forced by Danzo, with Root stirring things up in the shadows;

Itachi Uchiha's burden of being branded a missing-nin had also been orchestrated by Danzo;

All the filth and every mistake could be dumped onto Danzo in one go, perfectly solving every problem!

Behind the stove, Uncle Teuchi's hand trembled nonstop around the long chopsticks. He was nearly scared senseless.

His face was pale as he wailed inwardly, Who am I? Where am I? I'm just a ramen cook!

His legs had gone weak with fear, but he did not dare make the slightest sound. He could only remain frozen in place, breathing as lightly as possible, terrified that the two would notice he was still there.

Only then did Tsunade remember there was an outsider present. She turned and glared at the stove, her cheeks burning red with embarrassment and frustration. Her eyes clearly said, "Say a word, and I'll kill you."

Uncle Teuchi nearly lost his soul. He shook his head like a rattle drum and frantically gestured with both hands, his mouth moving at lightning speed. "I'm deaf, blind, and have amnesia! Don't worry, Lady Hokage, not a single word will leave me!"

At that moment, Uncle Teuchi's mind was flooded with frantic thoughts:

Holy shit, I'm finished!

Not only did I hear the Hokage say something so outrageous, I also stumbled upon a secret plot against Danzo! Those Root people are famous throughout the Ninja World for making people disappear. I'm probably about to vanish from this world today, without even ashes left behind!

If I'd known, I never would've earned Naruto's few coins for ramen! Help! Somebody save this innocent ramen shop owner!

Naruto held back his laughter until his shoulders shook, then waved a hand grandly. "Don't be afraid, Uncle. I'll come by often and support your business from now on!"

All Uncle Teuchi wanted now was to survive. Without thinking, he cried out, "No, no! Young Master Naruto, whenever you come for noodles from now on, it'll be free for life! Unlimited refills and char siu! All free!"

Naruto's eyes instantly lit up like lightbulbs, his grin nearly reaching his ears. "It's a deal! Uncle, you're truly the best boss in the world!"

Tsunade gave a light cough, suppressing her full-faced embarrassment. She rolled her eyes at Naruto and said in a deep voice, "We'll do as we agreed. We'll dump all the blame on Danzo. I'll handle what comes next."

"If this goes smoothly and Konoha's strength increases greatly, then the request you mentioned... might not be impossible to consider."

Naruto had originally been the aggressor, yet in an instant, he somehow became the one being toyed with. "Temptation, naked temptation. You've only been playing politics for a few days, and your heart is already turning black?"

After saying that, Tsunade turned and walked outside. Naruto eagerly followed after her, and the two left the ramen shop side by side, their backs strangely harmonious.

Only after the door fully closed did Uncle Teuchi collapse to the floor. Staring at the ramen in the pot, he finally realized what had happened and slapped his thigh as he howled in anger:

"Damn you, Naruto Uzumaki! You black-hearted bastard!"

"From the moment you refused to leave, it was all a trap! One scheme after another, tricking an honest man like me!"

"I seriously suspect you were just craving my free ramen and didn't want to pay for your noodles! So I'm the real sucker here!"