Not Everyone Is Qualified to Be My Dance Partner

S.H.I.E.L.D.'s black SUV sped along the desert highway, kicking up a cloud of yellow sand.

Chen Tian sat in the front passenger seat, his fingers rhythmically tapping the edge of the window. In the rearview mirror, 2B sat quietly in the back, holding Chen Tian's First Kitetsu in her arms.

"So," Natasha Romanoff said, one hand on the steering wheel while the other adjusted her sunglasses, "why did you suddenly take the initiative to contact S.H.I.E.L.D. and request to join the New Mexico investigation? More amazingly, how did you get Fury to agree?"

Natasha's voice was full of confusion. She had originally planned to offer herself to the tiger and use her beauty to get close to Chen Tian. After all, S.H.I.E.L.D. could easily investigate Chen Tian's feat of fighting three heroes in one night.

Chen Tian shrugged and sighed. "Can't be helped. The New Mexico matter is something you can't handle at all on your own, and I happen to need an official identity to get involved. I don't want to interfere without authorization and end up being listed by S.H.I.E.L.D. as an 'extremely dangerous, uncontrollable target.'"

Natasha's lips twitched. Even without your interference, Fury had already put you on that list.

"Nat, a hammer fell from the sky, and neither machines nor people can move it. Doesn't S.H.I.E.L.D. find that strange?"

Chen Tian was a little curious. Were S.H.I.E.L.D.'s people really that stupid? They actually thought it was some divine artifact they could use, wrapping it up to study it...

Natasha laughed. She thought it was rather stupid too. They called it a meteorite, but how could there possibly be such a precisely hammer-shaped meteorite?

"You know, S.H.I.E.L.D. is dedicated to protecting the lives and safety of people around the world. So, you understand."

"Isn't it all just for your own ambitions? After all, the snake... cough, cough, cough." Chen Tian had only gotten halfway through when 2B covered his mouth from the back seat.

"Master, you have said too much," 2B whispered near Chen Tian's ear.

Her Master was kind-hearted, with a smile that warmed people's hearts and a handsome face. (2B: I swear the author absolutely didn't force me to think that.)

It was just that he was sometimes too careless with his words. Fortunately, The Ancient One had instructed 2B to keep watch over Chen Tian at all times and prevent him from revealing anything more, so as to spare him from further danger.

The Ancient One's instruction had been recorded by 2B as her second-highest directive, right below "obey all of Master's orders."

"Snake what? Are you saying there are lots of snakes in New Mexico?" Natasha did not quite understand what Chen Tian meant.

Chen Tian removed 2B's hand from his mouth and shot her an annoyed look. "Yes, yes. Back in our ancient Eastern nation, snake soup is a delicious dish, especially when made with venomous snakes."

Natasha laughed. "When we get to New Mexico, I'll have my people catch a few for you. Remember to cook them for me."

Chen Tian turned toward 2B and said casually, "Did you hear that, 2B? I'll leave it to you when the time comes."

2B gave a slight nod, her silver hair glowing softly in the sunlight. "Master, I will prepare the most perfect snake soup for you." There was a trace of indulgence beneath her calm voice, while the sensors beneath her mechanical blindfold quietly recorded every change in Natasha's microexpressions.

Natasha glanced at the mysterious silver-haired girl through the rearview mirror, the corners of her red lips curling into an amused smile. "Your little girlfriend is so considerate."

Chen Tian looked at Natasha teasingly. "Of course. I'm also looking forward to seeing you become as considerate as she is."

Natasha glanced faintly at Chen Tian. "Really? I'm looking forward to it too."

There was an unclear meaning in her smile. Watching it, 2B frowned slightly. Is this one of the ripples The Ancient One mentioned?

Amid Chen Tian and Natasha's banter, the vehicle sped into a small town in New Mexico and stopped in front of a bar.

The moment the vehicle came to a stop, Coulson approached with his trademark gentle smile. He wore a crisp suit, his tie perfectly knotted around his neck, as though the desert heat had no effect on him at all.

"Agent Romanoff." Coulson nodded at Natasha before turning his gaze to Chen Tian and 2B. "Hello, Mr. Chen Tian, and... Miss 2B."

Chen Tian smiled in reply. "Hahaha, hello, hello. There isn't a sniper rifle aimed at me this time, right?"

Coulson's smile did not change. "Please forgive the previous offense. After all, S.H.I.E.L.D. exists for the sake of..."

Chen Tian cut in. "The safety of people around the world, right? I get it, I get it. Let's go in, shall we? I heard the liquor here is good."

Coulson hurriedly gestured for them to enter. "What Mr. Chen heard is correct. The tequila here is indeed no worse than the bartenders Tony specially hires."

2B's sensors immediately scanned the entire bar: thirty-seven customers, four bartenders, twelve exits, and... She frowned slightly. At least fifteen hidden surveillance devices.

"Master," 2B reminded him quietly, "this place is already completely under S.H.I.E.L.D.'s control."

Chen Tian patted her shoulder unconcernedly. "Don't worry, 2B. We can be considered S.H.I.E.L.D.'s 'unofficial personnel' now, right?"

As he spoke, he looked at Coulson. Coulson said nothing, merely smiling as he pushed open the door and led them into the bar.

The bar was dimly lit, and the air was thick with the smell of alcohol and grilled meat.

The moment they sat down at a round table, the aroma of barbecue wafted over them. Chen Tian stared at the sizzling, greasy ribs, his eyes lighting up. "Whoa, this service is way too attentive, isn't it? We don't even have to order."

Coulson elegantly unbuttoned his suit jacket and sat down. "Everyone here is with S.H.I.E.L.D." He picked up a napkin and wiped his hands. "Compared to the barbecue, I recommend trying the tequila first. It's a local specia—"

Before he could finish, Chen Tian had already raised his glass and drained it in one gulp, only to start coughing violently. "Cough, cough... This stuff has more kick than vodka!"

A blue glint flashed beneath 2B's mechanical blindfold. She calmly took Chen Tian's glass and dipped a fingertip lightly into the liquor to analyze it. "Alcohol concentration: 42%. Contains trace amounts of capsaicin. Master, I recommend drinking more slowly."

Natasha watched the scene with great interest, lightly pursing her red lips around her own glass. "You two really are sweet."

"Of course!" Chen Tian proudly wrapped an arm around 2B's shoulders. Rather than avoiding him, 2B leaned closer into his embrace.

Even while in Chen Tian's arms, 2B precisely cut off a piece of the most tender grilled meat and placed it on his plate.

Chen Tian stuffed the meat 2B had cut into his mouth and chewed contentedly, a bit of sauce clinging to the corner of his mouth.

2B immediately used a napkin to gently wipe it away, her movements so practiced it was as though she had done it thousands upon thousands of times.

Coulson maintained his professional smile, his fingers lightly tapping against the table. "Mr. Chen, regarding that hammer..."

"Mmph... about that..." Chen Tian replied indistinctly with his mouth full of food, casually picking up another piece of grilled meat. 2B handed him a glass of water at the right moment. He gulped down a few mouthfuls before continuing, "Um, didn't you already capture a female doctor named Jane Foster?"

Coulson's smile stiffened slightly. "Mr. Chen, we only just found Dr. Foster. How did you...?"

Chen Tian smiled. "As long as surveillance devices are connected to the internet, they can't hide from Tony."

Chen Tian had no intention of telling them that 2B had found out. Let Tony Stark take the blame.

Natasha set down her glass, her red lips parting slightly. "That female doctor is related to this hammer?"

"Um, more accurately, she's related to the muscular hunk you captured along with her." Chen Tian put down his knife and fork, rose to his feet, and looked at Coulson. "Let's go, Smile Assassin. Let's take a look at that muscular hunk who keeps claiming he's the God of Thunder."

Coulson's smile stiffened for a brief moment before quickly returning to its familiar gentleness. He rose gracefully and adjusted his tie. "It seems Mr. Tony's intelligence network is more extensive than we imagined."

Natasha's red lips curled into an amused arc. "I'm more curious why Tony Stark would help you investigate this."

Chen Tian grinned, revealing eight pearly white teeth. "Hehe, because I have a recording of him and Pepper making out like two seals fighting over a ball?" He casually accepted the coat 2B handed him. "Let's go. If we don't see that 'God of Thunder' soon, I'm afraid he'll tear down your temporary base."

2B quietly followed Chen Tian. Her silver hair gave off a cold sheen beneath the bar's dim lights. Her mechanical blindfold continuously scanned their surroundings as she whispered in Chen Tian's ear, "Master, at least twelve snipers have already taken position."

Chen Tian waved dismissively. "Relax, 2B. How could such a polite person as Agent Coulson possibly mean us harm?" He deliberately raised his voice. "Right, Mr. Smile?"

Walking ahead of them, Coulson smiled without looking back. "Of course. Mr. Chen is now our honored guest."

Once they stepped out of the bar, the blazing desert sun immediately made them squint. Three black SUVs were already waiting outside, their engines rumbling quietly.

Natasha opened the front passenger door. "Get in. It's a bit of a drive."

But 2B suddenly reached out to stop Chen Tian. "Master, please wait." She pulled a sun umbrella from her small carry bag and snapped it open. "Desert ultraviolet intensity exceeds safe levels. It will damage your skin."

Chen Tian put an arm around 2B's shoulders with emotion. "See? Just as expected of my 2B."

Natasha rolled her eyes and climbed directly into the vehicle.

The convoy sped along the desert road, sending yellow sand into the sky. Around twenty minutes later, a temporary base enclosed by barbed wire appeared in the distance. Dozens of military tents were arranged in neat rows, while a massive metal hangar stood at the center, surrounded by fully armed agents.

"Whoa." Chen Tian pressed himself against the window. "You built this place like Area 51."

Coulson glanced at him through the rearview mirror. "Just security precautions. After all, that hammer... is very special."

The convoy stopped before a checkpoint. After strict identity verification, it slowly drove into the base. Chen Tian noticed that the deeper they went, the denser the guards became. He could even see several armored vehicles and surface-to-air missile launchers.

"You sure have a complete set of equipment for stopping thieves," Chen Tian teased.

Coulson did not answer, merely smiling as he led them toward the central metal hangar. Two armed agents stood guard at the entrance, immediately snapping to attention and saluting when they saw Coulson.

"Is he inside?" Coulson asked.

"Yes, sir," one of the agents replied. "Our medical personnel are examining his body."

Chen Tian's expression suddenly turned unusually serious. He grabbed Coulson's shoulder. "Listen. If you want the agents here to live, immediately order them to withdraw at least three kilometers away. Even that might not be enough."

Coulson's smile froze on his face. "Mr. Chen, that joke is not funny..."

"Heh. Coulson, listen to me." Chen Tian sneered and looked toward Natasha. "Nat, you leave too."

Natasha frowned. "Chen Tian, what do you mean?"

Chen Tian took a deep breath and held out his hand toward 2B. Understanding, 2B placed First Kitetsu in Chen Tian's hand.

"Nat, there's going to be a major battle next, so leave this place first. And while you're at it," Chen Tian looked at Coulson, "take the Smile Assassin with you. After all, you're rare flowers in S.H.I.E.L.D.'s pile of filth..."

After saying this, Chen Tian pushed open the metal hangar's doors. Inside, a blond, muscular man was bound to a specially made metal chair. Though he looked disheveled, he still held his head high, radiating an innate kingly aura.

Beside him, a medic was examining the injuries agents had inflicted on him after he resisted.

Chen Tian held Kitetsu across his chest and slowly approached the bound blond man. As soon as the medic left the room, the muscular man began struggling violently, the metal chair producing an ear-piercing scraping sound.

"Mortals! Release me!" His voice boomed like thunder through the cramped space. "I am Thor Odinson, crown prince of Asgard!"

Chen Tian did not respond immediately. Instead, he circled Thor, carefully examining the legendary God of Thunder. Thor's blond hair was disheveled from struggling, fury burned in his blue eyes, and veins bulged along his heavily muscled arms.

Chen Tian waved at the medic, who quickly left the room. He had long since grown tired of this madman shouting in his ear for nearly an hour about being the God of Thunder.

After the medic left, Chen Tian locked the door. He pulled over a chair and sat across from Thor, his eyes fixed intently on the now-quiet Thor.

"Mephisto, where did Thor go?"

Thor froze for a moment, then tilted his head. His face suddenly twisted, his golden pupils gradually turning into snake-like vertical slits, while his mouth split into an exaggerated grin that nearly tore his face apart.

"Oh my~" His voice suddenly became hoarse and slick, carrying the brimstone stench unique to hell. "My dear little Eastern friend, how did you discover me?"

Chen Tian smiled and shrugged. "I didn't know. I was just saying it casually. I just didn't expect the so-called Lord of Hell to be so easily tricked into revealing himself."

"Hahaha—" Mephisto's laughter was as shrill as fingernails scraping glass, while Thor's face twisted into an exaggerated demonic expression. "Foolish mortal! Do you think you lured me out with a bluff?"

Chen Tian lightly tapped Kitetsu's sheath with his fingers, a faint smile lingering on his lips. "Otherwise?"

"My dear little Eastern friend," 'Mephisto' said, breaking free of the handcuffs and rising to perform an exaggerated bow, "the special fragrance of your soul can be smelled across nine planes." He suddenly leaned closer, the smell of sulfur rushing at Chen Tian. "Especially... that interesting little thing inside you."

Mephisto took a deep breath, and his expression abruptly turned astonished. He roared, "You deceived me! This isn't your true body!"

Chen Tian grinned as his body suddenly rippled like water, gradually becoming transparent. "Bingo~" His voice carried a hint of mockery. "As expected of a Lord of Hell. Your nose is sharp."

Mephisto's expression instantly froze. Genuine terror surfaced on that twisted face for the first time. He staggered back several steps and discovered that his body had returned to its original form rather than Thor's.

"E-Eternity?!" His voice trembled, all the arrogance of a Lord of Hell gone. "Impossible! How could you—"

Chen Tian's figure had completely dissipated, replaced by a majestic existence that could not be accurately described by language.

Eternity's body was made of countless stars, every contour constantly flowing and shifting as if it were a miniature universe. It had no distinct face, yet Mephisto felt as though countless eyes were watching him at once.

The surrounding space completely twisted. The bar, the base, and the desert all vanished, leaving behind nothing but pure white emptiness.

In the real world, Mephisto had already become an elderly man dressed in an immaculate suit. His once-ferocious face was now lowered, and a gloomy aura radiated from his entire body.

Visible chains of black energy coiled around him. Ancient runes covered every chain, flickering with a ghostly blue glow.

Beside Chen Tian stood a black-haired man in red armor, his arms folded across his chest and his expression arrogant.

"Madara, can you control him until Diablo finishes setting up the seal?"

A Mangekyō slowly rotated in Madara's eyes.

"Hmph, for trash like this, I don't even need to activate the Rinne Sharingan." As he spoke, he shot Chen Tian a dissatisfied glance.

"My lord, I could clearly deal with this kind of thing myself. Why have that ugly red-skinned thing set up a seal? That's completely unnecessary."

Chen Tian curled his lips. "An extra layer of insurance. Besides, we still don't know where this guy hid Thor."

"Hmph, my lord, you underestimate me too much. Even a Demon Lord may not be qualified to become my dance partner."

"And my lord, please don't turn me into your sword again next time. A ninja's Transformation Technique isn't meant for women to hold in their arms."