Chapter 15

Shi Jihan took in the whole scene and felt certain it was in the bag. He had 000 look: [Though I don't understand what they were saying in the middle, the result's the same. Look, they're already making eyes at each other.]

000 took his words to heart: [...At least it didn't fall through right away like the previous missions. (°ー°〃)]

Shi Jihan protested: [What's wrong with falling through? Soaking in hot water feels great too! I love adding milk and kneading it.]

After the two of them left, he secretly gave Zhou Zeyang a thumbs-up. "Nicely done!"

Zhou Zeyang beamed brightly. "Hehe, Boss taught me well."

After hesitating, he asked, "But their relationship seems stable to me, and your brother doesn't seem like the kind of person who'd hold his partner back, like you said."

"How wouldn't he?" Shi Jihan said. "Don't let appearances fool you."

He had read the original plot. It was a collection of melodramatic, agonizing, and cathartic—

Tortured romance.

Shi Bochuan had mistaken Shen Qinghuai for someone vain and materialistic, believing Shen Qinghuai had ulterior motives for signing a contract marriage with him. Because of that, Shi Bochuan had subjected him to years of cold violence and verbal humiliation.

After the fashion show, Shi Bochuan lost out in the conflict between the old and new factions. To secure his position as chairman, he dated heirs from other families while still married. Everyone said he was seeking a new business marriage and planned to kick his original spouse aside. Shen Qinghuai endured plenty of gossip and mockery, and was even slapped in public by one of Shi Bochuan's dates, suffering endless humiliation.

"My brother gets pretty inhuman later on. Let's hurry up and get through this part, then help scatter his ashes at the crematorium," Shi Jihan said, patting Zhou Zeyang's hand with the genial air of a leader inspecting the countryside. "Brother, I'm counting on you."

Zhou Zeyang did not understand, but that was fine. He could feel the heavy responsibility settling on his shoulders, and he nodded firmly. "All right. I definitely won't let everyone down."

After leaving the restaurant, he carried that heavy responsibility to his brother's company to freeload off the food and drinks.

Zhou Jingcheng was quite good at enjoying life. The chefs in the company cafeteria were hired with high salaries and excelled in all eight major Chinese cuisines as well as Western cooking, from the slow-fire techniques and knife work of Huaiyang cuisine to the art of French sauces.

It was just that, when he went to mooch a meal today, his brother's expression was extremely strange.

Zhou Jingcheng stared at him for a long time, looking like he had too much to say. "A few days ago, you said you found a part-time job recently?"

Zhou Zeyang could not bear to look away from the food. With his mouth full of rice, he nodded. "Mm-hmm. And the boss is your friend too—the guy you worked with last time. I recognized him the moment I saw him."

"Shi Jihan?" Zhou Jingcheng raised an eyebrow high, finding this turn of events increasingly surreal. He asked, "Brother, is this job respectable?"

"How isn't it respectable? It's high-end emotional counseling!" Zhou Zeyang finally swallowed and patted his chest. "I'm helping lost travelers cut apart the shackles of despair and guiding them onto the road home."

Zhou Jingcheng: "..."

Chuunibyou really was an illness.

He scrutinized his dim-witted younger brother for a long while and found that Zhou Zeyang did not seem to be lying. He was completely immersed in the holy radiance of a savior. Then Zhou Jingcheng thought that, with Shi Jihan's intelligence, he probably could not do anything too bad.

Then the Zhou Family probably would not end up in the social news.

Still, he found it very distasteful.

He said, "Don't tell Shi Jihan you're my brother."

Zhou Zeyang looked aggrieved. "Am I that embarrassing?"

Like he was petting a dog, Zhou Jingcheng rubbed his head and whispered gently, "You don't even have that much self-awareness, little brother?"

Zhou Zeyang: "..."

He grumbled to himself, No wonder you're single. With your personality, what kind of partner are you looking for? Just queue for PvP and go top lane.

The taut string loosened. Zhou Jingcheng looked at his younger brother, this bottomless pit for food, and found him annoying again. "You have time for a part-time job? You're clearly too free. Go home and walk Pizza for me."

"No!" Zhou Zeyang shot upright in dying protest.

What domineering CEO kept a beagle?!

-

When Shi Jihan contacted Zhou Zeyang again, he could clearly sense that the other man seemed to have had his life force sucked dry.

[Why Are You Still Awake?: Are you okay?]

[Yangzi Fried Rice: No. My life is full of holes...]

[Why Are You Still Awake?: Uh, then it's pretty breathable?]

[Yangzi Fried Rice: ...Boss QAQ]

[Yangzi Fried Rice has changed his signature to "Endure the harshest hardships, serve as the lowliest dog."]

Shi Jihan offered a little of the concern a boss ought to show, but not much. He immediately asked whether Zhou Zeyang had time tonight.

[Yangzi Fried Rice: That urgent? Sure, I have time.]

Of course it was urgent. Shi Jihan had just received a mission assignment called "Old Flames Rekindled."

[Ding, mission issued. Successfully make Shi Bochuan rekindle his passion for his white moonlight. Mission reward: Malice Points +27.]

[Completion countdown: 05:00]

He pointed at the timer and asked 000 why there was such a thing.

000 answered coyly: [Didn't I have a system error last time? I went back to the Unified Realm for repairs, and the Main System even upgraded me.]

"This is an upgrade?" Shi Jihan nearly abandoned all manners. "000, could you kowtow to me or something?"

000: [Hehe.]

Those two sounds nearly sent Shi Jihan away.

Thirty seconds passed while they traded barbs, scaring him into quickly contacting Shi Bochuan to ask what he was doing.

Shi Bochuan was touched by his third brother's long-overdue concern: [I'm working overtime with A-Huai. We'll probably finish around ten tonight.]

"Born workhorse," Shi Jihan said as he forwarded the message to Zhou Zeyang and told him to get to the parking garage immediately.

[This mission is kind of subjective. How do you determine whether it's complete?]

[I can detect Shi Bochuan's hormone levels. Love is essentially driven by biochemical reactions,] 000 said, only worried. [But they don't have any passion. How are they supposed to rekindle it?]

Shi Jihan was brimming with confidence: [Relax. I've got plenty of methods and strength.]

That was a huge sum of money, enough to make his brain run at high speed.

He messaged Zhou Zeyang to prepare for their meeting later.

[Why Are You Still Awake?: Wear a loose white shirt this time to hide your muscles. Put some powder on your face too—try to get as pale as my sister-in-law.]

[And soften your voice when you talk. Today we're going for a gentle, fragile look.]

Zhou Zeyang replied with an "Mm-hmm."

Then he looked at himself in the mirror.

He played basketball and got sunburned on the court every day. His skin was a healthy wheat color. The only way he could achieve Shen Qinghuai's complexion was with the strongest skin-smoothing filter turned on.

Most importantly, "Where am I supposed to find foundation?" He scratched his head, his eyes vacant.

9:40 p.m.

Shen Qinghuai finished work early and looked at Shi Jihan, who had been keeping him company. "I got so busy that I didn't notice you. Xiaohan, weren't you bored?"

"No, no," Shi Jihan said, shaking his head. He had recently downloaded a new game and was grinding himself senseless for a limited SSR. "Are we leaving now?"

Shi Bochuan did not even look up. "I still have some work to wrap up. You two can go get the car first."

"Okay."

Shi Jihan synced the live updates to Zhou Zeyang, who had been waiting for a long time.

The other man replied with "ok."

By the time the work was completely finished, it was already past ten. Shi Bochuan drained the last sip of coffee from his cup, shut down his computer, and took the elevator directly to the parking garage.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he only felt his eyes sting. He was probably overworked, so he closed his eyes briefly to ease the discomfort.

"Ding—" The elevator doors opened.

The dim light of the underground parking garage spilled in.

"A-Chuan—"

The instant Shi Bochuan opened his eyes, he saw a pale-faced ghost with flailing limbs charging at him while screaming his name.

His pupils constricted sharply.

Zhou Zeyang had put on powder and a loose white shirt. With excellent professional ethics, he had even sprayed on perfume.

He had just sprayed too much. The scent was so strong it was like he had fallen into a pool of floral water, making him sneeze nonstop.

"Achoo! A-Chuan, achoo! It's been days since we last met, do you—" Miss me?

Zhou Zeyang's vision suddenly spun, and a sensation of weightlessness swept over him.

He screamed in terror, "Aaaaaah!!!"

Shi Bochuan, who had cleanly thrown him over his shoulder, screamed even louder. "Aaaaaah! A ghost!!"

"A-Huai! A-Huai!! A ghost!!"

[Ding, "Old Flames Rekindled" has been completed. Mission reward: Malice Points +27.]

000 looked at the skyrocketing adrenaline data. [Re-rekindled?]

Chapter 15

Shi Jihan was wearing headphones and coordinating with Zhou Zeyang in real time.

"Aaaaaah!!!"

"Aaaaaah! A ghost!!"

Their alternating screams nearly blew off the top of his head, setting off a level-ten tsunami inside his brain.

He hurriedly reached to take off his headphones, but before he could remove them, Shen Qinghuai—who had heard the screams too—floored the accelerator toward the source.

The force shoved Shi Jihan straight into the seatback, and his head hit it with a bang.

"..."

He felt so dazed, as though he had gone to heaven.

He did not even hear 000 say, "Host, you're amazing! You earned twenty-seven thousand today!" He could only struggle to speak. "Brother Huai... slower..."

When the two of them drove to the scene, they saw a man holding a fire extinguisher and a ghost screaming madly.

"Fuck, nobody's going to die, right? They can't die, right?!"

"I'm filing for a workplace injury! Aaaaaah!"

Shen Qinghuai immediately got out of the car. "What happened?"

"A-Huai, y-you don't come over," Shi Bochuan said, his voice trembling. "Stay back. I'll protect you."

Shen Qinghuai: "..."

He said calmly, "Then why are you standing behind me? And why are you grabbing my clothes?"

Shi Bochuan followed his gaze to the hand desperately clutching Shen Qinghuai's shirt hem. He stiffly raised it, patted his wife's shoulder, and spoke even more stiffly. "It's fine. I'll protect you." As he spoke, he lifted the fire extinguisher again.

Zhou Zeyang screamed, "Boss!! Boss, save me!!!"

Shi Jihan jumped out of the car, looked at the chaotic scene, and decided they might as well drink the porridge while it was hot.

His original plan had been for Zhou Zeyang to pounce over, snatch Shi Bochuan's phone, and run.