Page 5

Swallowing quite a bit of water and dragging half a life along, Zhu Bafu relied on a few strokes of dog-paddle to crawl ashore with great effort. Resentful, he sat on a large boulder by the embankment, wringing out his long robe while muttering endless curses.

He could only blame Li Chenjing for being truly utterly devoid of virtue, with a conscience entirely eaten by dogs. Watching a living human being fall into the water right beside him, the man just stood there looking, not even speaking, detached from above and minding his own business as he fluttered his sleeves and stood with his hands behind his back by the dam, watching with cold indifference. Seeing him kick his feet and slap the water to pull off a few dog-paddle strokes, and concluding there was no real danger, the man actually turned around and paced away in such a clear, ethereal, and carefree manner.

Goddamn it! Fortunately, his Zhu family lineage was destined not to perish; otherwise, would the family incense really have been cut short in the hands of Li Si?

His entire body was soaking wet, revealing the curves he never usually exposed to others. Oh no! The binding cord of his inner tunic seemed to have loosened. He anxiously lowered his eyes to look at his chest, and sure enough, he saw two slightly rounded objects that were about to burst forth.

Damn it, damn it! He hurriedly reached his hand into his inner tunic, tightening the loosened cord once more. Gritting his teeth and pulling a face, he was mustering all his strength to tighten the cord when suddenly, a pair of large hands reached out from behind, covered his mouth and nose, and dragged him into a narrow alley.

Oh no! Could this be enemies seeking revenge over the love letters and flirtatious verses he usually wrote for people? Men and women falling in love, love triangles, incestuous romances, and the like were none of his business; he was just a little scribe who played with words and brushed!

"Spare... Mph! Spare my life! Spare my life!" He struggled and thwacked about with all his might, managing to squeeze out a few broken phrases through the person's fingers, but in the end he was no match for the man's strength and was shoved forcefully against the corner of the wall.

Already hidden in a dead angle where he would not be easily discovered, the man slightly relaxed the force in his hand while raising his other hand high. Zhu Bafu assumed he was bound to be dealt a punch, so he hurriedly hugged and protected his head, closed his eyes, and loudly proclaimed his innocence.

"G... Great uncle, spare my life! You have no idea it's not easy making a living in our line of work either, and we have our unspeakable hardships. Things like you loving him and him not loving you happen every single day; things like you loving her and her happening to marry someone else also happen every single day; and what's more, things like you loving her and her sleeping with someone else happen every single night too! Every radish has its hole, every pot has its lid, and one is willing to beat while the other is willing to suffer. T... these emotional matters are simply not things we humble scribes can control. Every debt has its debtor and every wrong has its perpetrator—you really must keep a clear perspective on the mortal world, and when looking for enemies you ought to find the right counterpart!"

"You haven't stayed in the water long enough, and you want to be thrown back in for another drink? Spouting so much nonsense in one breath, aren't you thirsty, Zhu Bajie!?"

Zhu... Zhu Bajie?! How dare anyone call the dashing and debonair young master Zhu Bafu by the name of Zhu Bajie?! What kind of dead punk from the streets was this?!

Zhu Bafu stealthily opened his eyes and saw a pure silver, phoenix-carved, jade-inlaid pipe thrust right in front of his eyes, sending wisps of fragrant smoke drifting directly toward the tip of his nose, with a few sparks splashing from the bowl to land unfavorately right on his nose tip.

"Hot, hot, hot! High Person, master, we are under the imperial domain; you can't abuse private lynching!"

"Bah! Using private lynching on your kind would dirtying my hands. Good for nothing, bad at everything."

The lofty and arrogant voice made Zhu Bafu feel a double sense of familiarity. Could this be that client from a few days ago who wore a black gauze bamboo hat, left behind quite a bit of silver, and ordered him to write a love poem for that Li Chenjing?

With a "clack", a foot in a black boot stepped onto the wall before him. A flash of golden-red figure leaned sideways against the wall, lowered himself, and unceremoniously pinched his wet, dripping chin with two lifted fingers. Only then did he lock eyes with a pair of pupils full of mockery and displeasure.

On the day he commissioned the letter, this client had wrapped himself up tightly, leaving behind only an order, some loose silver, and a date and time for the transaction before turning around and striding away. Today, however, he was arrogant and high-profile, holding a tobacco pipe that looked extremely expensive, dressed in gorgeous brocade garments with a red tunic over a golden gauze lining that made his whole person look rich and imposing. His long hair was scattered and flowing, simply tied back and cascading from the back of his neck down to his chest. The binding cord for his hair was a top-grade gold-threaded carved-embroidery cord, rather long, with two red jades dangling from the knot.

"You Zhu Bajie, I told you to hand the written love letter to the person who came—why didn't you give it? You took my money and won't do my bidding; are you looking to die?" Holding the pipe in his mouth with one hand, he used the other hand to firmly grip Zhu Bafu's chin, shaking it left and right. Putting on the air of a big boss, he squinted his eyes and sized up the thin, short, and easy-to-bully scholar before him with a roguish look, his bully's persona pointlessly ruining such a handsome and dashing appearance.

"Cl... client master, you are truly wronging this humble person here. This humble person definitely intended to hand the letter to the contact person, but that Young Master Li suddenly stood there for some reason—"

"Nonsense! I deliberately tricked him into standing there precisely so you would hand the letter to him!"

"How could that do! That was bought by you, client master, from this humble person with your money. Since that Young Master Li is your beloved, then it's only right for you, client master, to personally hand the love letter into his grasp. If this humble person gives him the letter, what would that even be? Wouldn't that be seizing a love by force?"

"Who did you say was my beloved?" His slender pupils narrowed dangerously, and his profile leaned in close to him, signaling him not to run his mouth off and talk nonsense.

Zhu Bafu felt uneasy being stared at, shrinking his neck as he increased the distance that was about to touch the client master's lips. "A-actually, when it comes to this kind of matter, gender doesn't really matter; the pursuer should just be a bit more magnanimous, right? As a thief who steals hearts, what is there to be embarrassed about? This humble person thinks you should boldly stand right in front of Young Master Li, say nothing at all, and directly pin him down into your arms. Y... yes, right, just use the exact force you're currently using to pinch my chin—push him, pin him down, pull him, embrace him... Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, it hurts, it hurts, stop using force!"

"You chatterbox of a Zhu Bajie, you listen well and get this straight: I do not have any cut-sleeve affections; I only like women! Plump and slender women with breasts, waists, and asses, not some stinky man who acts like a lump of ice and loves to put on airs, nor a painted, sissified pansy like you!"

"Hmph! If you don't like him, then don't like him—why are you scolding me?"

"Because you ruined my plan! I wanted to let the whole city know that Li Chenjing has no normal interest in women!" Having said that, he even smugly curled his lips and snorted with a chuckle, his eyebrows even flashing with wicked and charming brilliance.

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Ancient Romance

Cross-dressing Female