From Now On, I'm the King of Sunglasses (Officially Signed-Please Vote and Tip!)

Naruto took Konohamaru deep behind enemy lines to observe for an hour. After taking a bath while they were there, he had to drag Konohamaru away because the boy could barely walk.

They had just reached the Small Woods and were about to begin the next stage of training when Ebisu, the man in glasses, found them.

Perched on a branch, he looked down at Naruto. His sunglasses hid his eyes, but not the contempt on his face. "Damn Demon Fox," he muttered.

Naruto's senses had grown sharp. He caught Ebisu's attitude immediately, and the events of the past two days came unbidden to mind.

The fat shopkeeper had bullied him. He was dead.

The Dog-Faced Anbu Ninja had insulted him. He was dead.

Silly Mizuki had acted friendly while despising him inside. He was dead too.

And now there was Ebisu.

Why does everyone treat me this way? Damn the Third Hokage! Damn Ebisu! Naruto cursed inwardly. He stared coldly at Ebisu and found himself asking:

"If I were stronger than all of you, would you still treat me this way?"

"Huh? What did you say?" Ebisu looked at Naruto in amusement, thinking he must have misheard.

"I said, if I beat you up, would you still dare treat me this way?" Naruto asked through clenched teeth.

"Hmph, Demon Fox!" Ebisu ignored the question and turned to Konohamaru.

"Young master, let's go. Someone of your standing shouldn't be around an idiot who only knows vulgar ninjutsu! Spend enough time with him and you'll become an idiot too!"

"Screw you! Multiple Shadow Clone Technique!"

Naruto's expression changed. He barked out the technique and formed the Hand Seals. In an instant, over a hundred Shadow Clones surrounded Ebisu.

"Well, well. Does the stupid Demon Fox think he can beat me with flashy, useless ninjutsu? How childish!"

Ebisu began forming Hand Seals for a ninjutsu of his own.

"Sexy Technique!" shouted all the Shadow Clones at once. With a string of pops, clouds of smoke burst into view.

More than a hundred beautiful women of every description, completely uncensored, struck seductive poses at Ebisu.

"What?" The sight overwhelmed Ebisu. Blood poured from his nose, and his mind went blank.

Konohamaru watched in a daze. Naruto had completely led the boy astray.

Meanwhile, the Third Hokage, who was spying on them through his Crystal Ball, coughed guiltily. He glanced around, then pulled out a pink handkerchief to wipe his nosebleed.

Naruto wasn't about to waste an opening like that. Each of the hundred uncensored beauties landed a kick, knocking Ebisu out cold.

Then Naruto walked over with a cold smile, picked up Ebisu's sunglasses, and put them on.

Heh. Nice gear. These'll hide where I'm looking, Naruto thought with a grin before leading Konohamaru away.

Back home, Naruto thought carefully about his next steps.

The next morning, he went to school for the "graduation briefing," which was really just where they assigned everyone to teams.

Today would be the starting point of his rise to power.

In his plans, Sasuke, Kakashi, and the others would all help him along the way.

It was still early when Naruto reached the classroom. Only a handful of students were there.

Seeing Sasuke eating a rice ball, he walked straight over and said with a chuckle:

"Sasuke, we're about to start taking missions and become real ninja. The people who did well at school won't necessarily stay ahead."

Sasuke shot Naruto a disdainful glance. "A dead-last loser like you has the nerve to talk big?"

"I may have been dead last, but my dream is to become strong." Naruto leaned closer and lowered his voice. "Strong enough that no one can push me around again. And I'll help you get your revenge."

Sasuke whipped his head around and stared at Naruto in disbelief. "How do you—"

"Shh!" Naruto raised a finger, signaling him to keep his voice down.

"So? How about we help each other and grow stronger together?" Naruto went on.

Sasuke was someone Naruto could use to grow stronger. That was why he wanted to win him over.

Sasuke's cool expression returned, but his eyes were full of distrust. "How exactly would you help me grow stronger?"

"We train together every day and share what we've learned, along with our ninjutsu," Naruto said with a smile. He was almost ready to reveal what he was really after.

"Hah. What could you possibly teach me?" Sasuke asked mockingly.

"I killed Teacher Mizuki and beat Konohamaru's private tutor, Ebisu. Do those count as experience?" Naruto met his gaze in challenge.

"Oh, and Konohamaru is the Third Hokage's own grandson. You can guess how good his tutor must be!"

Naruto continued enthusiastically. "Agree, and I'll teach you the secret ninjutsu I used to take them both down. I'll even show you all around Heaven and Earth!"

"Hmph. Sounds nice, but what do you want from me?" Sasuke wasn't stupid. He went straight to the heart of it.

"I hear your family has a lot of Ninjutsu Scrolls," Naruto said with a smile.

That was right. Naruto had his eye on the Uchiha clan's valuable inheritance!

"So that's it." Sasuke gave a cold laugh and turned away. "But I don't believe a dead-last loser like you."

"If you don't believe me, let's go outside and fight right now!" Naruto pressed.

Sasuke ignored him. He finished his rice ball, stood up, and headed for the bathroom.

Talking to a loser like Naruto was a waste of time. He would be better off practicing his Hand Seals.

Naruto watched him go and rolled his eyes. After a moment's thought, he followed Sasuke into the bathroom.

He would corner Sasuke in there and give him a thorough beating. Then Sasuke would believe him.

"Multiple Shadow Clone Technique!"

Naruto barked out the words. In an instant, his Shadow Clones packed the entire boys' bathroom!

Sasuke stared at the sight in shock. Suddenly, he couldn't pee at all...

"Sasuke! Are you scared yet?" a dozen Narutos shouted at once.

"Oh, screw me," Sasuke muttered stiffly. He started to form the Hand Seals for Fire Release Ninjutsu, but the Narutos filling the bathroom pounced, punching and kicking him to the floor.

Five minutes later, Naruto swaggered out of the boys' bathroom in his sunglasses. Sasuke trailed behind him, disheveled and looking miserable.

With the sunglasses on, Naruto felt like all he needed was a machete. The theme song from Young and Dangerous sprang unbidden into his head:

"I take the world by storm, go where I please, admired by everyone!"

"I take the world by storm, and I never look back!"

"I turn the world upside down and write my own laws!"

The class's dead-last student had taken down its star rookie of six years in one go. Naruto wanted to shout something gloriously overdramatic:

"When my flowers bloom on the eighth day of the ninth month, all others will wither."

"Beating Sasuke felt amazing. From now on, I'm the King of Sunglasses!"