"Move it! You spineless Midgardian weakling! Haven't you eaten?!"
Thor's booming roar thundered over the ruins of Hell's Kitchen, accompanied by the crackling blue sparks of a high-voltage stun baton.
"Aaaah! Stop shocking me! My ass is getting cooked!"
Dave Lizewski let out a bloodcurdling scream. A heavy iron chain was fastened around his waist, dragging four heavy truck tires weighing a full five hundred pounds combined as he tore through the mud like a rabid dog whose tail had been stepped on.
"Too slow! At that speed, you couldn't even catch an Asgardian slime! Faster!"
Thor strode after him, brandishing the sizzling high-voltage stun baton, a bizarre madness flickering in his eyes.
If you ignored what Thor was wearing, this would have been a touching picture of a strict teacher producing an outstanding student.
The problem was precisely what he was wearing.
The crown prince of Asgard, the strongest warrior in the Nine Realms, was currently dressed in an extremely snug black-and-white Maid Uniform trimmed with lace!
His granite-like, bulging biceps stretched the Maid Uniform's puff sleeves almost to bursting; his broad back pulled the zipper taut, as though it might shoot off like a bullet at any moment;
And beneath the skirt, which barely reached the tops of his thighs, two thick legs covered in dense blond hair were fully exposed! Worse still, those legs were clad in black stockings!!!
Every step he took was an assault on the eyes, enough to give any mentally sound Earthling nightmares for three days and nights.
"Teacher! I'm done! Ten laps!"
Dave finally crossed the finish line and collapsed into the muddy water with a thud, gasping like a dying fish. He didn't even have the strength to move a finger.
Yet the results of these two weeks of hellish training