Guard against thieves, burglars, and Gojo

Unfortunately, I never gave Megumi Fushiguro and Yuji Itadori the chance to "discuss hand-to-hand combat," because...

"If I turned into a puppy, would you still love me?"

"..." Megumi Fushiguro fell silent as he watched the girl crouching in front of him with a serious expression, her tail wagging wildly.

"Hm? Why aren't you saying anything? Sob..." Her eyes immediately reddened, misting over until a few tears gathered, poised to fall.

"Wait! I would... probably..." Megumi Fushiguro answered with difficulty.

Only then did the drunken girl let him off, satisfied. She shifted to meet Toge Inumaki's eyes. "If I turned into a puppy, would you still love me?"

"...Salmon."

The girl nodded in satisfaction and looked at Maki. "Huh? I have to answer too? And how can she still understand Toge when she's like this?!"

After waiting ages without an answer, the girl's ears and tail drooped. Her lips turned down, and she was about to cry. Maki panicked, scrambling to answer, "Yes, yes, I would!"

Before the girl had even fully turned her gaze toward him, Yuji Itadori hurried to answer first. "Me too! No matter what you turn into, Edano will still be Edano!"

And so the girl got unsteadily to her feet and walked toward Panda.

Panda chuckled and scratched his head. "Huh? You're asking me too? This is kind of embarrassing."

He hadn't been laughing long when the girl dove headfirst into his arms, loudly mumbling, "Cat! Bear! So comfy!"

"..." × 5

They tried to peel the girl off Panda, but she clung to him like an octopus, and every attempt ended in failure.

"...What do we do? How are we supposed to get her back to her room to rest when she's stuck to him like that?"

"Yeah, and Edano doesn't seem to understand us anymore..."

"..." Megumi Fushiguro was silent for a moment, then finally formed a hand sign and summoned his Divine Dogs.

"Awooo-" Little White affectionately rubbed against the girl's face, seemingly talking to her.

"Awoo, awoo~" Little Black circled around her too.

At last, the girl loosened all four limbs from Panda.

Maki spoke in admiration. "Leave it to you, Megumi. Who would've thought of that!!!"

Then she hesitated a little. "But is being like this really not going to hurt Edano? What do you think, Toge?"

Everyone looked at the only proper Cursed Speech User present.

"Bonito flakes, tuna mayo. (No idea. Try some hangover soup. We'll probably have to wait until she wakes up and undoes it herself.)"

"I'll go get Ieiri!"

Bang! The door to the brightly lit Infirmary was shoved open.

"Oh? Itadori? What's wrong? Why are you in such a hurry..." Shoko Ieiri turned around, but before she could finish, Yuji Itadori urgently cut her off.

"Ieiri, in the lounge, Edano's..."

This time, before Yuji Itadori could finish, he saw Satoru Gojo stride over from inside the Infirmary and disappear right in front of him with Shoko.

Yuji Itadori was left standing there in bewilderment. "...Why was Gojo-sensei here?"

Jujutsu High, lounge

"Ieiri! Come take a look at Edano..."

"What happened to her?!" Satoru Gojo hurried after Shoko, pushing through the door ahead of her, only to see his students gathered helplessly in a circle around a girl lying in the middle.

The girl had sunk into sweet dreams. For some reason, ears had sprouted from her head, along with a fluffy tail.

Her pale face was flushed red, carrying the faint glow of alcohol. A tipsy smile lingered on her lips as she curled into a ball, the very picture of drunkenness.

"...What happened?" Satoru Gojo directed a questioning look at Megumi Fushiguro.

"Ahem. She got drunk and used Cursed Speech on herself." And then she'd ended up like this.

"Mustard leaf, tuna mayo."

As Shoko tried to treat the girl, Panda helpfully explained, "Toge says there's no need to worry. She should be able to undo it herself once she sobers up, but she might need some hangover medicine."

After examining both drunken girls, Shoko Ieiri stood up. "All right, nothing serious. I'll head back and keep working on my report. Remember to give Edano and Nobara a glass of honey water before bed, or they'll have headaches tomorrow."

"Ieiri, let me walk you back. I'm the one who called you over..." Yuji Itadori, who had just caught up, stood by the door.

"No need. You should all head back and get some rest too. I'll be fine here at Jujutsu High."

"But Maki, sorry for the trouble, but I'll leave Edano in your care. The others are all men, after all."

Shoko Ieiri looked at Satoru Gojo, who was crouching on the floor poking the girl's fluffy tail, and pointedly emphasized the word "men."

A sharp glint flashed in Maki's eyes as she pushed up her glasses. "Understood."

After Shoko Ieiri left, Satoru Gojo scooped the girl into his arms, only for Maki to swiftly stop him. "Satoru, Edano's staying in my room tonight."

"Hm?" Satoru Gojo paused.

Maki put more weight into her words. "I'll take good care of her."

Confused by the undercurrents between them, Yuji Itadori quietly asked Megumi Fushiguro beside him, "Fushiguro, why does it feel like Gojo-sensei and Maki are arguing?"

Toge Inumaki nodded in agreement. "Salmon."

Megumi Fushiguro hadn't been raised by Satoru Gojo for nothing. Connecting this to Shoko and Maki's earlier "riddles," he keenly picked up on something.

"It's nothing. Gojo-sensei's just a real scumbag."

"Huh?"

"..."

Meanwhile, the silent standoff continued.

"Maki, Edano's eyes still aren't stable. To keep her from accidentally hurting you, her teacher will just have to stay with her~"

"Just wrap the Silk Ribbon around them again. Satoru, don't you have missions?"

"Great Teacher Gojo already finished them all~"

"Whatever you say, you're a man, Gojo. With Edano this drunk, it's more appropriate for me to take care of her!"

Satoru Gojo reluctantly pouted. "Fine, come with us, then." He grabbed Maki by the back of her collar.

"...Idiot!"

Satoru Gojo used Teleportation to bring us to my room.

"? Edano's room isn't here, is it? Aren't these the faculty dorms?"

Satoru Gojo opened the door with practiced ease. "Oh~ Edano moved here a little while ago~"

"Huh? You scumbag!"

He gently laid the girl in his arms on the bed. "How could you say that about your teacher, Maki? The higher-ups ordered me to keep Edano under constant supervision~"

"That'll only fool Edano. They never told you to move her into the room next to yours!"

"Ah, you caught me~" Satoru Gojo simply stopped trying to hide his scumbag tendencies. He propped his chin in his hand and leaned against the bedside, playing with the girl's fluffy tail.

Maki tried to smack Satoru Gojo's hand away, but Limitless repelled her. All she could do was reclaim the girl's tail and glare at the shameless teacher.

Satoru Gojo had returned from vacation without yet changing into his blindfold. Behind his sunglasses, his deep eyes were fixed on the girl sleeping soundly in bed.

Beneath the clear moonlight, they glittered like stars. The tenderness in his gaze spread all the way to the corners of his eyes, something even he had never noticed.

"...Are you serious?"

"Come on~ Don't make your teacher sound like some womanizing jerk, Maki."

"...Does Edano know?"

"She has absolutely no idea. It's quite a headache for me too~ Are you going to play wingwoman for your teacher, Maki?"

Maki drove Satoru Gojo out of the room. "Hah, dream on!"

Not throwing obstacles in his way would already be showing him respect as her teacher! As if she'd help!

Bang! The door slammed shut.

"Don't you dare break into a girl's room, you scumbag!"

Outside the door, Satoru Gojo rubbed his nose and slipped one hand into his pocket. Entirely oblivious to what a scumbag he was, he was still thinking to himself.

Edano's eighteen. In another two years, we can submit the marriage registration, right? Hmm, I really wish time would go a little faster~