Twins

He had only been born a few seconds earlier, so why had he become this child's big brother? What did being twins mean? Pondering questions he could not understand, Xia Xia took his first breath in this world.

After birth, the warm, damp touch of the fetal membranes gave way to the dry chill of the operating room, tinged with the smell of disinfectant. His newborn skin stung for an instant as it met the air.

His thoughts wore away in a flash.

His understanding dissolved, and amid a helpless, bewildering chaos, Xia Xia stopped thinking.

An infant's brain could not sustain intellect and reason. With a not particularly forceful pat from the doctor, the child let out a rather quiet cry.

That hurt. Couldn't you be gentler?

No. To prevent respiratory obstruction, medical staff in delivery rooms usually used this method to make newborns cry, allowing their airways to open properly and preventing suffocation.

Look on the bright side. The other child will go through the same thing. It's the same for everyone...

"Welcome to this cruel world."

"Xia Xia, and Yuji."

That was what his father and mother said.

The older child seemed to realize that his father and mother shared the same presence.

But they were his father and mother, so it was all right.

Was it?

Don't worry about those details.

When he grew a little more lucid again, it was a peaceful afternoon. Sunlight spilled through the window onto the floor, spreading into patches of orange-yellow, and the air smelled of wooden furniture and clean cotton.

The swaddled child heard the old man say:

"Jin."

The white-haired old man pushed open the door and stood before his son, gazing at his two newborn grandsons, his tone tinged with helplessness and complicated feelings.

"What is it, Dad?"

"If you're going to talk about her, I'm leaving."

His pink-haired father spoke evenly, as though he already knew what his grandfather would say.

"Jin, my son."

"You're free to live whatever kind of life you want, but you mustn't get involved with that woman... you'll die."

An unshakable firmness entered the old man's voice, as though he had realized that some kind of suffering was already inevitable.

"Please don't say strange things like that in front of Yuji and Xia Xia. I've heard that memories from infancy actually stay with you forever."

His father remained resolute.

"I know you've always wanted children, and I know you and Kaori couldn't have any, but the reason Kaori died..."

His grandfather was halfway through speaking when the door opened again. A familiar, reassuring scent-it was his mother.

"Dad, what are you talking about?"

His black-haired mother interrupted their conversation, approached the swaddled infants, and picked up her children.

That scene was etched into Itadori Xia Xia's mind.

His father, grandfather, mother, and the younger brother beside him.

Just as his father had said, he would never forget that scene for the rest of his life. Memories from infancy would stay with him forever.

Unless something unexpected happened, he might never recall it for the rest of his life, but at some special moment-when his consciousness blurred, or when his life flashed before his eyes near death-that scene would appear before him again.

He would remember what his mother looked like, and clearly see the scar on her forehead that formed a pieced-together four-pointed star. It looked a little like stitches and a little like a decorative tattoo. He did not find it strange.

Because she was his mother, it was all right.

His mother had been like that from the beginning, so there was nothing wrong with it. Nothing felt unusual at all.

His mother was simply his mother, the mother who had given him life.

He remembered that Grandpa did not like his mother.

He remembered his father's gentle smile.

He remembered his mother's warm embrace.

He remembered his younger brother's soft breathing.

It was as though some hollow void in his heart had been filled by the feeling of having his family gathered around him. A surprising ache welled up, and tears kept flowing from the corners of his eyes.

Why was he crying?

Because of joy.

Xia Xia rejoiced in having a family. He was happy for that simple reason alone. The child felt heartfelt happiness because his father, mother, brother, and grandfather were all together.

As for those keen intuitions, there was no need to think about them or pay them any mind. Children needed no reason to cry. In this world, children had special privileges.

The milk had a sweet, faintly raw taste. After drinking it, his body felt a little more real than before, and his once-hazy vision gradually grew clearer.

His mother sat beside the bed, holding a rustling toy and gently rocking the cradle as she told bedtime stories from a fairy-tale book. His father, wearing square-framed glasses, sat on the other side of the bed, looking after his younger brother and changing his diaper...

If only time could stop at this moment.

If only I had never sought the truth.

Then could this happiness last forever, never disappearing, never leaving me?

Then came an autumn when he learned to speak, a spring when he finally learned to walk, and a summer he remembered, though he did not know when it had been.

"Xia Xia, what are you thinking about?"

His mother gently gathered the boy sitting in a daze on the balcony into her arms and stroked his head.

"Mommy and I have black hair, but Daddy and Yuji have pink hair. We're all family, so why?"

In his mother's arms, Xia Xia touched the hair hanging over her shoulder with his finger.

"Because we're family. Xia Xia looks like Mommy, so Yuji has to look a little more like Daddy. There's nothing we can do about that."

"Do you want pink hair too, Xia Xia? You're still too little. When you're older, you can dye your hair the same color as Yuji's."

His mother patiently explained it to her curious little boy.

"No, it's nothing. There are sunset clouds over there."

The boy pointed out the gold-edged clouds to his mother, his eyes fixed only on the sky outside the window.

"Yes, it'll be evening soon."

"I need to hurry and make dinner. Daddy will be getting off work too. Xia Xia, could you help Mommy by playing with your little brother for a while?"

His mother stood as she spoke and put on her apron.

"Yuji's still asleep."

The boy pointed at his younger brother on the sofa, who had been playing with toys just a moment ago and was now fast asleep.

"You're the big brother, Xia Xia. You have to take good care of your little brother."

His mother suddenly said something that seemed to come out of nowhere.

"I know, Mommy."

The boy smiled casually.

"I want a rice bowl for dinner!"

"What about Yuji?"

"Yuji likes rice bowls too, so it's fine."

Yuji would definitely say that either rice bowls or noodles were fine, and that there were no foods he disliked at all. Xia Xia thought it was wonderful that he and his little brother had similar tastes. It saved them so much unnecessary trouble.

As he spoke, the child jogged into the room, fetched a blanket, and draped it over his sleeping brother.

The summer afternoon was a little muggy, but the house had the fragrance diffuser his mother had bought, so it still smelled quite pleasant even without the air conditioning on. Leaning back in his chair, Xia Xia felt a little sleepy too and simply went to sleep.

He did not know how much time had passed before the doorbell rang.

It was his father, carrying an old-fashioned briefcase.

He had brought the toy car he had promised Xia Xia the night before, along with manga for Yuji. His father had also bought himself a few cans of beer. His mother went to the door and gave him a hug.

"Xia Xia, Yuji, Daddy's home. Go wash your hands and get ready to eat. Dinner is hamburger steak rice bowls and miso soup..."

His mother woke his younger brother as she spoke.

The family sat around the dinner table.

"Let's eat!"

Everything his mother cooked was delicious, but before eating, Xia Xia still cut off a small piece of his hamburger steak with his spoon and slipped it onto his younger brother's plate.

"Big brother?"

Yuji seemed a little confused.

"Just eat. Don't worry about it."

"Eat plenty, and hurry up and finish. When we play Aeroplane Chess and cards after dinner, I won't go easy on you anymore. No crying if you lose."

Smiling, Xia Xia reached out and ruffled his younger brother's messy pink hair, then began eating the food on his own plate.

Because he was the older brother, he had to take good care of this little brother who made him worry, no matter what. It was his inherent responsibility as a big brother.

Xia Xia's heart was small, with room only for the few people in this house. As long as these days could keep going, he was willing to give anything for them.

As long as his little brother could grow a bit healthier, he did not mind eating a few bites less of his favorite meat at every meal.

After dinner, Xia Xia volunteered to help Mommy wash the drinking glasses.

The fairy-tale book said that bad children who did not help their mothers wash the glasses would be snatched away by an evil witch on their way downstairs to the convenience store. Xia Xia was a good boy, so he was not afraid of evil witches.

But if I were taken away, Daddy, Mommy, and Yuji would be sad, wouldn't they?

To eliminate that possible danger, after reading that story, Xia Xia obediently listened to his mother after every meal and washed all the drinking glasses the family had used.

Standing on a little stool, he rose onto his tiptoes to reach the faucet, put on gloves, and turned on the water...

The water washed over his hands, bringing a cold sensation.

He carefully washed all the water stains and dust from the glasses until they sparkled beneath the living room chandelier. Xia Xia had done this many times already, so he was super good at it. With a little patience, he could always do it well.

"Big brother, play Aeroplane Chess with me."

"I'm done eating. Play with me, play with me."

Like a puppy let out of its cage, Yuji ran to his older brother's side and took his hand.

"All right, Yuji. I'm almost done washing the glasses. Set up the board first, and I'll be right there."

Smiling, Xia Xia dipped two fingers in the water and dabbed his younger brother's forehead, soothing the child who loved to wheedle.

"Forgive me, Yuji. Wait just a little longer."

"Hmph, you always say that. Really, you just can't remember how to set up the board, can you? You're so sneaky."

"Hahaha, Yuji saw right through me."

"Then sorry for the trouble, clever little Yuji, but could you set up Aeroplane Chess for your big brother first? I know you can do it."

Xia Xia gazed gently at Yuji and said nothing more.

The cruelest part of the past was that we could never foresee the value of a moment until it became a memory-an ordinary afternoon, laying the groundwork for a daze many years later.