Like a seasoned farmer sensing that a pig was about to root up his cabbages, Kyoko casually asked one more question. "Who's looking for our section chief this time?"
The officer on duty cautiously glanced at Fubuki, who was waiting for an answer. "It's... a very beautiful young lady."
Just as I thought. Another little vixen!
"Then our section chief isn't here!"
"Huh?" Josen had just walked into the office when he stopped short. "Kyoko, is someone looking for me? What do you mean, I'm not here?"
"Hmph. Just a nuisance call."
Seeing his deputy chief's little face clouded over, Josen shrugged. "Oh, okay."
Beep, beep, beep...
The phone clicked off on the other end, leaving the officer on duty at a loss. "Um..."
"I heard." Fubuki toyed with the ends of her hair, looking intrigued. "So he's deliberately avoiding me? Heroes really do all have their own quirks."
"It's fine. I'll wait right here until he gets off work."
Crack.
Something seemed to shatter inside the stunned officer's heart.
The Special Affairs Section.
"Chief, the fax with your official appointment papers has arrived."
"Really? Headquarters certainly moves fast."
Josen took the stamped document Kyoko handed him and scanned it.
"Following deliberation, the following decision has been made:
Z City patrol officer Josen (badge number PCZ9527) is hereby promoted to assistant inspector of the Special Affairs Section and appointed chief of the Z City Special Affairs Section, with a probationary period of one year.
This appointment takes effect immediately.
-A City Metropolitan Police Department."
Josen lowered the appointment papers and handed them to Kyoko for filing. "All right. You guys are next."
Kyoko took them with a tinge of envy. "We're not like you, jumping three ranks at once! Ow..."
Josen stood and pushed the young policewoman away with a finger against her forehead. "This is nothing. No need to make such a fuss."
Back at training camp, he had turned down the big shot's offer to get him into the senior ranks at Headquarters within a year. Now that would have been a meteoric rise.
After clearing the section's backlog, Josen seized the brief window while Kyoko went to the restroom to dust off his backside and make his escape.
When there was work, let the deputy do it. When there wasn't, do the dep...
To keep his subordinate from rebelling, Josen avoided the front entrance. He activated his psychic power, launched himself down the hallway, and clocked out at light speed.
Night fell.
Fubuki sat in the lobby's reception room, idly flipping through a police magazine.
Quitting time had long since passed. Aside from those working overtime, those on duty, and those with unfinished cases, most of the officers had already left by early evening.
Gurgle...
Fubuki's stomach issued a quiet protest. Her brow twitched, and a vein faintly bulged on her forehead.
She had waited so long that she was starving.
That awful man! He's actually staying at work this late just to avoid me. This is outrageous!
"Miss Fubuki, I ordered a Dragon and Phoenix Noodles combo. Would you like some?"
The officer on duty, who had volunteered for overtime and chased away his replacement in the process, approached with a steaming container of noodle soup. The aroma wafted into Fubuki's nose. Her vision darkened, and her stomach felt even emptier.
"...No, thank you. Please ask again for me. Where's Officer Josen? Has he still not finished work?"
"Oh, you're still waiting for him?" The officer smiled, something sinister stirring inside him. "I just ran into someone from the Special Affairs Section. Apparently, Officer Josen left work at noon."
At noon...
He left work!
A terrifying aura erupted. The officer, who had just tattled on Josen, shivered. The takeout in his hands suddenly floated up beyond his control. His police cap, the reception room's pens and paper, and its tables and chairs all took on a shimmering blue glow and rose into the air together.
Finally, the officer himself felt a force bind his limbs and neck, lifting him off the ground in defiance of gravity.
"M-M-Miss... Fubuki! Please stop... I... can't... breathe..."
Whoosh-
Fubuki regained her senses amid her outburst and exhaled a breath of pent-up frustration through her small mouth. The green glow faded from her eyes. Deprived of her psychic power's support, everything floating in the reception room clattered to the floor.
"My apologies, officer. Sorry for the trouble." Fubuki turned and walked out of the reception room. "Now, I have an irresponsible man to settle a score with."
"Wh-what... irresponsible?"
He seduced her and dumped her?!
With the overturned bowl of Dragon and Phoenix Noodles perched on his head, the officer's vision went black, and he passed out completely.
"Ah-choo!"
Josen, who was dealing with a Soap Monster's attack on a women's bathhouse, suddenly closed his eyes and sneezed. Despite having a chunk sliced off, the monster was still lively as ever. Its eyes lit up, and it shouted, "An opening! Take my ultimate move-Bubble Beam!"
Two streams of linked soap bubbles burst from the monster's hands and shot forward.
Josen took out a tissue and wiped his nose. With a snap of his fingers, a rust-covered Road Roller appeared out of thin air, hurtling down toward the monster's head with crushing momentum as it cackled viciously.
"Uh..."
The wild laughter cut off abruptly. With a thunderous crash, the Road Roller smashed a cracked crater into the ground, sending clumps of liquid soap splattering everywhere.
"So noisy. Bubble Beam, seriously? What do you think you are, a Water-type Pokémon? Since when were Pokémon this perverted and useless?"
Josen blew his nose and tossed the tissue into a trash can as he grumbled.
He barely had time to turn the Road Roller, which had finally gotten a rare chance to appear, back into a card before a crowd of enthusiastic female fans wrapped in bathrobes and towels descended on him.
"Mr. Super Police, thank you for saving me!"
"Josen, that monster was so scary! Thank goodness you were here... You little b**ch, get out of his arms!"
"Why should I? I got here first!"
"Super Police, I love you!"
"Please don't crowd. If you want autographs, come one at a time..."
"Miss, please put your clothes on."
"Ma'am... miss, please restrain yourself."
"..."
The scene descended into utter chaos for a while.
Only when the reporters arrived did Josen manage to use an interview as an opportunity to shake off the mob of frenzied fans.
"Whew. Somehow, that felt harder than dealing with a Demon-level Monster."
A white monster card appeared in Josen's hand: the Wolf-level Monster "Lewd Soap," whose ability made the surrounding environment slippery.
Just how pathetic was a monster of this level?
If those female fans had swarmed it with the same enthusiasm they had shown for their idol, they probably could have torn it limb from limb.
However much it mutated, it was still just a bar of soap.
He casually dismantled the useless card for enhancement materials, only for his Stand to send back a message.
[The monster's base stats are too low. Enhancement failed.]
Josen: "..."
Watching his card stock drop by one, Josen inexplicably felt as though he had been freeloaded off.
He hardly needed that tiny improvement now anyway. Even if he had worked for nothing, at least he had gained some exposure as a hero. And then there was the free eye candy a few of those enthusiastic young female fans had thrown in...
Hot. Way too hot!
Thinking of it that way instantly lifted his mood.
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