Old friends

"I've found you, Bloody Finger Nerijus. Here, you and your cursed blood will meet your end!"

The gold phantom and the red phantom clashed in a flurry of ringing blows.

The gold phantom wore a metal kasa and a feathered rain cape, wielding an absurdly long Odachi.

The red phantom wore a hooded coat and held an outrageously short dagger.

Their allegiances were as diametrically opposed as their weapons. They immediately became locked in fierce combat, reducing Tarnished, the original star of the show, to a spectator.

The gold phantom had the upper hand. After all, greater reach meant greater strength, and his absurdly long Odachi was downright unfair. Though wielding it required tremendous skill, once that requirement was met, it could give an enemy endless trouble.

Within just a few exchanges, the red phantom had taken several cuts. The gold phantom pressed his advantage, hoping to finish his enemy in one go, but the red phantom suddenly flicked his dagger. Several blades of blood shot out, catching the gold phantom off guard and tearing open two wounds. The blood blades also carried a Blood Loss Curse, making his blood boil in an instant, bursting his wounds open and sending blood spraying.

"Urgh!" The gold phantom grunted, swaying as he sank to one knee.

The red phantom was also at the end of his rope, panting just as heavily.

They exchanged a look, simultaneously pulled out a Flask of Crimson Tears, and simultaneously drained it.

Tarnished: "..."

Well, look at that. Drinking together, are we? Why not link arms and share a wedding toast while you're at it?

In any case, the Flasks of Crimson Tears healed their wounds, putting them both back where they had started.

Perhaps because they had just bloodied each other so badly, neither dared attack recklessly now. It was rather like a man facing a wolf with a flimsy stalk for a weapon-both sides were scared.

The red phantom paced, looking for an opening. While keeping his guard up, the gold phantom spared some attention to warn Tarnished. "Be careful. He's Bloody Finger Nerijus. He's already ambushed and killed more than a dozen Tarnished here, a terrifying opponent whose strength makes one tremble. Only by setting aside life and death and giving it our all can we hope to survi-"

Before the gold phantom could finish, the two Crucible Knights stepped forward at a glance from Tarnished and swung their greatswords, noisily chopping that Neri-whatever fellow into finely minced meat.

The red phantom did put up a fight, but his little dagger was so short and tiny that even if the two Crucible Knights spread their legs and let him thrust, he still couldn't get it all the way in. He unleashed his blood blades again, but the heavily armored Crucible Knights barely felt a thing. Blood Loss Curse? It was nothing compared to the Prince of Death's thick, enormous death curse earlier!

Watching his mortal enemy dissolve and vanish, the gold phantom was left speechless.

Tarnished came over and asked, "What was it you said we had to do to have a chance of surviving?"

The gold phantom: "..."

Tarnished smiled. "Anyway, thanks for your help. I'm Tarnished. And you?"

"My name is Yura. Yura, Bloody Finger Hunter," the gold phantom said. "I know you, the new master of Stormveil Castle. That is probably precisely why Nerijus chose you as his target. After all, killing a renowned Tarnished pleases the Mother of Truth more than killing an ordinary one."

"The Mother of Truth? That guy belonged to the Blood Order?"

"The proper name is the Mohgwyn Dynasty, but it hardly matters. It's only a name." Yura shook his head and kindly warned them, "Be careful of dragons when traveling around Agheel Lake. Those creatures are beautiful but dangerous. If you encounter one, be sure to hide-"

"You mean Flying Dragon Agheel?" Tarnished interrupted Yura again. "We defeated it. Now it's Stormveil Castle's fleshli... water heater."

Yura gaped, looked at Tarnished, then at the two Crucible Knights chatting nearby, and once again said, "..."

"It seems my presence was unnecessary." Yura sighed.

"A helping hand offered in kindness is never unnecessary." Tarnished extended an invitation. "Mr. Yura, would you consider joining Stormveil?"

"Thank you for your kindness, but my goal lies elsewhere." Yura sheathed his long blade and bowed. "You defeated a tyrant and treated the people well. Such noble conduct deserves admiration. But I have another mission to fulfill and cannot follow you. All I can do is pray day and night that everything goes smoothly for you."

Rejected yet again. It would have been a lie to say Tarnished wasn't disappointed.

But Tarnished also knew what weighed on Yura's heart and understood that this wasn't the best time to recruit him.

He quickly adjusted his mood and returned the bow. "In that case, I won't press you. You came to save my life, Mr. Yura. If you ever need help, please come to Stormveil Castle. I will do everything in my power to assist you."

Yura solemnly thanked him and accepted that promise. Then he took out the Finger Severer and severed the connection, turning into motes of light and returning to the time and place where his true body resided.

[Finger Severer]: An illusory blade that severs connections between Tarnished, allowing the user to return to their original world.

That farcical assassination attempt came to an end. The deity's twisted amusement was over, and its power gradually dissipated, lifting the white mist surrounding them.

"Let's go." Tarnished headed toward the nearby cave entrance. "That's Moo-water Cave over there."

"It's Murkwater Cave," Laurendi said coldly. "I never thought you could speak so elegantly. I thought all you knew was plain talk like, 'I have to protect everyone.'"

"Of course I use plain language with ordinary people, but that doesn't mean I don't know elegant words. Speaking differently to different people-that's the wisdom of an Elden Lord."

"Hmph. Nothing but trimming your sails to the wind."

"It's called understanding people's hearts. Keep talking like that, and I'll make life difficult for you once I become Elden Lord." Tarnished pointed at Murkwater Cave. "Time for you two to get to work. Go!"

The two Crucible Knights entered Murkwater Cave. Sounds of fighting soon rang out, but just as quickly died away. Then the two Crucible Knights emerged covered in shit.

Yes, actual shit.

Strictly speaking, Murkwater Cave hardly qualified as a cavern. It wasn't deep, just a slightly oversized little cave.

A band of deserters had gathered there and occasionally robbed passersby, which was why Tarnished had marked them for elimination.

Being deserters, they obviously weren't living well. Their weapons and equipment were terrible. Eventually, someone had hit upon the bright idea of stuffing feces into Cracked Pots to make Rancor Pots, resulting in the Crucible Knights' thoroughly shitty predicament.

[Rancor Pot]: Can be thrown at enemies to inflict deadly poison.

Scientifically speaking, that was fairly reasonable. Shit did contain plenty of bacteria, after all. But against Crucible Knights encased in heavy plate armor, even large crossbow bolts might fail to penetrate, let alone a pile of shit.

Rodini and Laurendi certainly hadn't been poisoned, but while the damage was negligible, the humiliation was considerable.

Tarnished hadn't expected these deserters to be so damned bold. Back when he'd been dressed in rags and looked easy to bully, throwing shit at him was one thing. But daring to fling shit at two hulking men in heavy armor? They really were manly men.

Unfortunately, after a thorough beating from the two Crucible Knights, those "manly men" were all crouched on the ground with bruised, swollen faces and their hands over their heads, sobbing like a bunch of women.

Tarnished was a little surprised. "They covered you in shit, and you only beat them up? I thought you'd slaughter them all in a rage."

"In the past, I certainly would have!" Laurendi snapped. "But didn't you already lay down a rule in Stormveil? Soldiers aren't allowed to harm civilians!"

"They don't count as civilians, do they?" Tarnished examined the shit-throwers' battered equipment. "They seem to be deserters."

"Deserters aren't soldiers!" Laurendi declared firmly.

"All right." Tarnished added, "But if they aren't soldiers, doesn't beating their faces black and blue still count as harming civilians?"

"Well, uh..." Laurendi was at a loss, but Rodini smiled faintly and said, "They fell."

Then he laid his greatsword against the deserters' necks and asked, "Isn't that right?"

The deserters weren't complete idiots and nodded frantically.

Rodini withdrew his greatsword. "See? They admitted it themselves."

Tarnished was speechless, while Laurendi quietly gave Rodini a thumbs-up.

"Fine, we'll let this go. But what I want to say is..." Tarnished's expression turned serious. Assuming it would be the same old spiel about gathering everyone's strength and therefore treating people kindly, Laurendi couldn't help rolling his eyes. But what Tarnished said next caught him completely off guard.

Tarnished said earnestly, "When I said soldiers weren't allowed to harm civilians, I meant our civilians, friendly citizens. The purpose was to prevent soldiers from abusing violence and undermining our internal unity. But that rule does not include civilians outside Stormveil. Call me selfish, call me cruel, but I simply can't take care of everyone. A battlefield changes in an instant, and combat is fraught with danger. I want our soldiers to return safely from every mission, not die in a foreign land because of one foolish order of mine. I'm truly sorry for causing this misunderstanding, and even more sorry that it exposed you to additional risks! Once we return, I'll revise the rule to make it clearer, so every soldier can understand its true meaning."

Rodini and Laurendi didn't know what to say.

They genuinely didn't, because they had never encountered anything like this.

They had assumed this new rule was Tarnished's way of winning hearts and cultivating a virtuous reputation. Though it annoyed them, powerful people always did such things, and they were used to it.

But they had never imagined Tarnished would also consider the soldiers. From the outset, he had never intended to trade their safety for his own reputation. After learning that they had misunderstood, he even apologized sincerely and promised to revise the rule to clear up the misunderstanding.

A king who apologized?

They had never even heard of such a thing!

With neither self-respect nor regal bearing, if someone like Tarnished could become king, it would be the most ridiculous joke in the world!

But why?

Why did someone utterly unqualified to be king make them hope he would become one?

The two Crucible Knights stood frozen, and the deserters also stared blankly at Tarnished.

Excitement? Gratitude?

They couldn't explain it themselves. They had never encountered anything like this, so all they could do was remain silent.

But while they couldn't speak, someone else could.

A mocking voice rang out, dripping with scorn. "A big shot who cares for his people? Hahaha, what a fantastic joke! Lying bastards deserve divine punishment. Leave your valuables and get lost!"

As he spoke, a bald Tarnished in leather armor jumped down from a high platform, a spear in one hand and a greatshield in the other. At first, he swaggered like he owned the place. Then he spotted the two Crucible Knights, turned pale with shock, and spun around to run.

Tarnished was already well accustomed to this fellow's behavior. He snapped his fingers and ordered the Crucible Knights, "Catch him."

The two Crucible Knights immediately advanced, and within a few moves had the bald man scrambling all over the place.

Realizing he couldn't escape, the bald man decided to pick on the weakest target. He couldn't beat the two Crucible Knights in their full suits of heavy armor, but surely he could beat that fellow over there, who was just as tall, imposing, and devastatingly handsome as he was.

I'll break through there!

Having made up his mind, the bald man rolled past the Crucible Knights' interception, raised his greatshield, and charged at Tarnished.

The Crucible Knights had initially worried he might hurt Tarnished, but once they saw him raise his shield, they immediately relaxed and settled in to enjoy the show.

The bald man launched a shield charge at Tarnished without hesitation. In his mind, even if the attack couldn't defeat his opponent, it would force him to dodge, giving him a chance to escape.

But to his utter surprise, Tarnished neither dodged nor evaded. Instead, he kicked the shield. With a clang, the bald man instantly lost his balance and fell face-first into the mud. Before he could figure out what had happened, the two Crucible Knights had their greatswords pressed against his neck.

"Playing with shields in front of me? Why don't you try grafting in front of Godrick while you're at it?" Tarnished declared proudly. "I can kick over a Crucible Knight's shield too!"

The two Crucible Knights twitched. He could make his point without dragging them through the mud.

But that twitch gave the bald man a fright. Thinking the two mighty Crucible Knights were about to chop him up, he hurriedly shouted, "W-wait! I surrender! I surrender!"

Ah, that familiar dialogue. That familiar flavor.

Tarnished nodded to the two Crucible Knights. "Let him go."

Rodini and Laurendi withdrew their greatswords.

The bald man let out a long breath. "Whew, finally, someone who'll listen. Thank goodness. I actually knew from the start that you were a reasonable sort. Hehehe..."

"Then why did you attack me?" Tarnished asked.

"I thought you were a Demi-Human or something. Only after taking a closer look did I realize you were Tarnished too," the bald man hastily said. "It was a complete misunderstanding. I'm terribly sorry. But unfortunate misunderstandings like this happen all the time. And if you ask why, it must be because there's something wrong with this country and its system!"

Well, damn. We've already reached 'What's wrong with this country?' and 'It must be the system,' have we?

Tarnished snorted. "You mistook me for a Demi-Human? Do you think I'd believe such a pathetic lie?"

"Like I said, it was just a misunderstanding. Now that we've cleared things up, let's let bygones be bygones and get along from here on out. How about it?" the bald man said with a cheerful smile. "I'm Patches. Patches the Unbreakable. I'm Tarnished, just like you, and a Tarnished who travels all over the place, at that. Might I ask your esteemed name...?"

"Tarnished. As in a Tarnished."