Yūto carefully raised the binoculars, his heart nearly leaping out of his chest the instant he aimed them at the gap in the wall.
Inside the steam-filled bathhouse, several hazy figures were faintly visible, and he could clearly hear water dripping from their hair.
He held his breath, his fingers trembling slightly with nerves.
"S-someone's coming!"
Tsukimi suddenly tugged at the hem of his clothes, keeping her voice extremely low.
The sound of soles striking paving stones came from a distance. Yūto hastily put away the binoculars, and the two pressed themselves against the wall, shrinking into the shadows.
Tsukimi's back was pressed against his chest, and he could feel her pounding heartbeat through their clothes.
"It's an ANBU patrol..." Tsukimi whispered breathily, her warm breath brushing Yūto's ear.
As the footsteps drew closer, Yūto instinctively pulled Tsukimi a little closer into his arms, their shadows almost merging into one in the moonlight.
A while later, after the ANBU patrol left, Yūto continued gathering material.
He had just raised the binoculars when a beauty with Blond Hair suddenly appeared in his field of view.
He instinctively assumed it was Nonō. After all, Nonō's hair was blonde too.
He was just about to lower the binoculars when his gaze suddenly swept over a pair of towering peaks.
Wait, Nonō's weren't this tall, were they...
Yūto raised the binoculars again and aimed them at the beauty with Blond Hair's face, only to discover to his surprise that it was Tsunade.
Even more terrifyingly, Tsunade was looking straight at him!
Yūto's breath instantly caught, and cold sweat slid down his temple.
Through the binoculars, Tsunade's amber eyes stared straight at him through the lenses, a dangerous curve lifting the corner of her mouth.
"I'm done for..." His throat tightened, and his fingers began trembling involuntarily.
Sensing something was wrong, Tsukimi hurriedly tugged at his sleeve. "What is it?"
"I-it's Lady Tsunade!" Yūto's voice shook as he fumbled to put away the binoculars.
But before he could turn and flee, the ground suddenly began to shake violently.
The bathhouse wall shattered with a crash, and Tsunade's towel-wrapped figure appeared faintly through the dust, water still dripping from her wet Blond Hair.
"Brat!" Tsunade cracked her knuckles, her smile growing more ferocious. "Have you figured out how you're going to pay for peeping on me in the bath?"
Tsukimi's legs went weak with fear, but she still stood in front of Yūto. "Lady Tsunade, we were only..."
Before she could finish, Tsunade flashed right before them.
Yūto felt the world spin as monstrous strength sent him flying, and he smashed through three trees before coming to a stop.
Sprawled in the wreckage, he watched Tsunade approach step by step and actually felt a thrill of relief. At last, he could die a heroic death, just as he had wished!
But isn't this a little early? I haven't finished Icha Icha Paradise yet!
Fighting back her embarrassment, Tsukimi spread her arms in front of Yūto, her voice trembling slightly. "Lady Tsunade, please hear me out! Yūto... he wasn't peeping for some filthy purpose!"
Tsunade's clenched fist stopped in midair, the droplets falling from the edge of her towel reflecting a cold glint in the moonlight.
"Little girl, move aside." She narrowed her eyes. "Or do you want a taste of my fist too?"
"H-he was doing it to earn money by writing a novel!"
Tsukimi shouted with her eyes closed, the tips of her ears crimson. "The orphanage's funding has been cut by seventy percent! The children can barely afford to eat! Yūto wanted to write a bestseller and donate his royalties to the orphanage..."
By the end, her voice was choked with tears. "If you have to hit someone, hit me! I'm his teammate. It's my fault for not keeping an eye on him!"
Tsunade slowly lowered her raised fist, her brow furrowed as she studied Yūto sprawled on the ground.
She snorted. "Making money by writing that kind of filthy book? Brat, you're certainly good at making up excuses."
Just then, the other women in the bathhouse gathered around, wrapped in towels, asking over one another, "Lady Tsunade, what happened?"
Tsunade glanced at the bedraggled Yūto and the red-faced Tsukimi, then suddenly turned and waved the others away. "I was mistaken. A stray cat knocked down the wall."
After the women dispersed, still dubious, Tsunade grabbed Yūto by the collar. "If you dare lie to me, I'll bury you in the Naka River as fertilizer."
She turned and gestured toward the shadows, and an ANBU member immediately appeared. "Go fetch Nonō from the orphanage."
Tsunade released Yūto, her fist still clenched beneath her towel. "If I find out you're using the orphanage as an excuse..."
Tsukimi hurriedly bowed. "Lady Tsunade, everything we said is true!"
After hearing Tsukimi's explanation, Tsunade gave no indication either way.
Only when Nonō appeared did she turn toward the woman hurrying over. "Has the orphanage's funding really been cut by seventy percent?"
Nonō adjusted her glasses and nodded gravely. "Yes, Lady Tsunade."
"We only received the notice this morning. After the war mobilization order was issued, the village prioritized funding for the front lines, and the orphanage's allocation was drastically reduced."
There was a trace of exhaustion in her voice; clearly, she had been worrying about this for some time.
Tsunade snorted, her clenched knuckles cracking. "That old Third is getting more muddleheaded with age! He's even cutting the children's food money!"
She glanced at Yūto sprawled on the ground. Though she still thought earning money by writing that kind of book was absurd, at least his motive was reasonably proper.
"Hmph. I'll let you off this time." Tsunade unclenched her fist and left him with a warning before turning to go. "If I catch you skulking around the bathhouse again, one punch won't settle it!"
Once Tsunade disappeared from sight, Nonō finally breathed a sigh of relief, then looked at Yūto, not knowing whether to laugh or cry. "You really went and started writing that kind of book?"
Her tone was both helpless and touched, and her eyes reddened slightly.
"I just wanted to help the children..."
Yūto scratched his head, feeling a little embarrassed.
Nonō suddenly stepped forward and gently hugged him. "Thank you, Yūto."
Watching the two embrace, Tsukimi felt a faint pang of bitterness, but she quickly hid her feelings and said with a deliberately lighthearted smile, "All right, this guy's injured. We need to get him home to rest."
Only then did Nonō release Yūto, and she and Tsukimi supported him on either side as they headed toward his home.
Although Yūto ached all over, he felt it was rather nice, too.
The door to the Hokage's office had been violently kicked open, and the visitor was none other than a furious Tsunade.
She had already changed her clothes, but she had come in such a hurry that she had not even had time to dry her hair.
Seeing the office door suffer damage yet again, Hiruzen Sarutobi shook his head helplessly, put down his pipe, and said:
"Tsunade, could you lot knock properly for once?"
Tsunade ignored him completely. She had come to demand answers. "Old Third, did you cut the orphanage's funding?!"
"I could let it slide when you said assigning a medical ninja to every squad would cost too much, but how much could a bunch of children possibly cost?!"
"If that Uchiha brat hadn't told me about this, I wouldn't have known you could be so stingy!"
Seeing Tsunade's accusatory manner, Hiruzen Sarutobi was rather bewildered.
Before you continue