By his fourth day staying at the Village Chief's house, Duan Qizhao had mastered a whole repertoire of food-stealing tricks.
While Li Guizhi squatted in the courtyard peeling garlic, he could time his dash into the kitchen to the second, flick open a food storage bag, and pocket half a plate of braised pork, sauce and grease included.
While Zhao Pengfei squatted beside his motorcycle polishing the wheel rims, Duan Qizhao strolled brazenly out the front door with three braised pig's trotters stuffed into his coat's inner pocket, his expression unchanged.
Even the big black guard dog at the Village Chief's house had grown familiar with him through his feeding. It never barked when he carried food in his pockets, and even wagged its tail as it saw him out.
Every afternoon at three, Duan Qizhao appeared punctually at the gate to Shen Wangjing's courtyard.
He tossed his stolen haul onto the low table, still making excuses. "The food at the Village Chief's place is too good. Li Guizhi cooks like ingredients are free. I can't finish it all, and throwing it away would be a waste."
After Duan Qizhao kept bringing stolen meat and fish back to feed Jiang Xun, Li Guizhi finally caught him.
Li Guizhi glared and unleashed a torrent of abuse. Her sheer speed, rich vocabulary, and piercing pitch crushed every attempt Duan Qizhao made to get a word in before it could leave his throat.
Duan Qizhao was no match for her when it came to hurling abuse. He only knew a handful of insults, endlessly cycling through "Are you sick in the head?", "You're the one who's sick," and "Your whole family's sick."
Li Guizhi, meanwhile, could go on for ten minutes without repeating herself. Furious, Duan Qizhao dragged his suitcase back from the Village Chief's house that very night, looking as though he had just faced a major life decision.
"I've thought it over. Sure, the Village Chief's place is comfortable, but I, Duan Qizhao, am not the kind of person who chases comfort. I came on this show to experience life. What kind of experience is sleeping in a soft bed and feasting on meat and fish every day?"
Duan Qizhao puffed out his chest. "I, Duan Qizhao, swear right here that from this day forward, even if sleeping on this cold bench gives me a slipped disc, I will never set foot in the Village Chief's house again!"
And so Duan Qizhao returned to the three-legged bench, wrapped himself in the army coat Shen Wangjing had given him to use instead, and spent another night tossing and turning in the main room, where drafts blew in from every side.
Early the next morning, he sprang up from the bench with his blue hair looking like a bird's nest, brushed his teeth and washed his face in one smooth sequence, then followed right on Jiang Xun's heels.
However slow he might be, he had figured out one thing-follow Jiang Xun, and there would be food.
Breakfast at Shiban Village Middle School was still the same three things: vegetable mush, cornmeal buns, and corn porridge.
Duan Qizhao squatted on a long bench with his bowl, took a bite of a cornmeal bun, and his scrunched-up face relaxed again.
"You know what? Once you get used to these things, they're actually pretty tasty."
He was busy shoveling down his food when a middle-aged woman in a blue cloth apron appeared in the cafeteria doorway. Her gaze passed over several students in the front who were licking their bowls clean and locked straight onto his bright blue head.
"Whose kid are you? I haven't seen you before."
"I'm new." Duan Qizhao stood up with his bowl and stuck out his chest. "I'm with the show, from the city. Heard of it?"
The middle-aged woman clearly hadn't. She frowned. "Your name isn't on the list. If you're not a student here, you can't eat here. You have to pay."
Duan Qizhao froze for a moment, then turned to Jiang Xun.
Holding his bowl, Jiang Xun shifted half a body's width aside and lowered his head to drink his porridge, his face saying, "I barely know this guy."
Duan Qizhao took a deep breath, set his bowl on the table, and tilted his head up, shamelessly refusing to budge. "I don't have any money! Go ask the production team!"
"I don't care what show you're talking about. Our school has rules-"
"Then go talk to the production team. I didn't make the rules." Duan Qizhao pointed toward the village entrance.
"The director's in that white car at the village entrance. Go ask her for it. They dragged me here against my will. Technically, you should be providing me with three meals a day, plus afternoon tea and a late-night snack. I'm only eating one breakfast here, so you're already coming out ahead."
The middle-aged woman: "..."
In the end, she left seething, throwing out a parting warning: "If you still don't pay tomorrow, don't come back."
Duan Qizhao put his shamelessness to full use, waving at her retreating figure with a grin that begged for a punch. "We'll talk about it tomorrow!"
After breakfast, Jiang Xun dumped his bowl and chopsticks into the sink, wiped his mouth, and headed out through the school gates.
Duan Qizhao instinctively followed him a couple of steps. "Where are you going?"
"Back to sleep."
"You're not going to class?"
"Nope," Jiang Xun said as though it were only natural.
Duan Qizhao hesitated at the classroom doorway for a moment.
Going back to Shen Wangjing's house would only mean lying around. At least in the classroom, there were living people to talk to.
Back in Capital City, Duan Qizhao had been somebody in his social circle, after all. Yet he had been dumped in this godforsaken mountain backwater for an entire week without anyone to chat with, and it had nearly driven him crazy.
Now that he had finally cornered a few living people, there was no way he would let them go.
He entered the classroom, sat on the teacher's desk, crossed his legs, and cleared his throat.
"Your classroom's way too run-down. You don't even have air conditioning? What wattage is that bulb? It's not even as bright as the lights in our hallway."
Several boys below exchanged looks.
"Do you know what kind of house I live in?" Duan Qizhao traced an enormous circle in the air.
"The swimming pool alone is this big. It's indoors and temperature-controlled, so you can swim even in winter. There are dozens of sports cars in the garage. My favorite's the Ferrari. Floor it, and it can hit three hundred."
A chubby boy with a runny nose widened his eyes. "Three hundred? How fast is that?"
"Ten times faster than that tractor at your village entrance."
Gasps rose one after another from below.
In less than fifteen minutes, seven or eight students had gathered around him.
With his legs crossed, Duan Qizhao went from the temperature-controlled pool at his villa to the private cinema in the underground garage, from his dad's limited-edition watches to the cash-filled red envelopes his family gave relatives' children at New Year-
"Even the thinnest ones are this thick." He measured out a width with his fingers, and the children around him let out a perfectly synchronized "Wow."
"Is your family even richer than the Village Chief's?" the chubby boy asked.
"The Village Chief's?" Duan Qizhao gave a scornful laugh. "That shabby house of his wouldn't even qualify as a maid's room at my place."
Another, louder "Wow" followed.
After being stifled in this impoverished mountain backwater for a whole week, Duan Qizhao's vanity finally received ample nourishment.
The more he talked, the more carried away he became, until he practically wanted to announce his dad's safe combination to everyone.
Then the tall, skinny boy named Xiao Guang leaned over and asked in a low voice, "You're staying at Shen Yuxing's house?"
Duan Qizhao had just reached the part about having dinner with a certain top celebrity. Displeased at the interruption, he grunted an acknowledgment.
Xiao Guang's expression instantly grew subtle. He exchanged a glance with the children beside him, leaned closer, and lowered his voice even further.
"Then do you know how Shen Yuxing's dad died?"
Duan Qizhao's bragging paused for a second. Before he could speak, Xiao Guang went on without waiting.
"His dad drowned after Shen Yuxing's older brother pushed him into the river. My older brother saw it with his own eyes! Everyone in that family is really cold-blooded. You'd better watch out..."
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