Something Even More Ridiculous Than Bullshit (Part 1)

After Shen Fei stepped through the door, he noticed Su Bai was no longer beside him. He turned and saw Su Bai standing ramrod straight at the entrance. Shen Fei had no choice but to go back, take Su Bai by the shoulder, and pull him inside. "What are you standing there for? Come in with me!"

Su Bai coughed lightly and defended himself in a low voice. "It's not that I won't go in. I don't have an invitation. How about... you go in by yourself? I'll wait for you at the door?"

Shen Fei laughed in exasperation. "What, I eat and drink inside while you stand out here in the wind and rain? If you're not going, neither am I. We'll leave together."

The man in a suit standing at the entrance looked at Su Bai and gave a slight nod. "Sir, although you don't have an invitation, the invitation of the gentleman beside you is enough to establish your identity."

Su Bai steeled himself and said, "Then... all right."

What kind of class reunion is this? It's clearly a Hongmen Banquet. If Xiang Zhuang comes out and starts dancing with a sword in a bit, things will really get interesting.

Beyond the porch was a tree-lined path, with a row of sparsely spaced camphor trees on either side. Through the gaps between the leaves and branches, the banquet's multicolored lights were faintly visible.

Su Bai had been to the Fanghua Holiday Hotel once before, so he was fairly familiar with the place.

The difference was that the last time he walked down this path, he saw young men and women wearing masks and dancing gracefully to enchanting music.

This time, when he walked down the path, he saw the classmates and schoolmates with whom he had spent three years, day in and day out.

Beside the pool, dozens of young men and women sat together, some holding drinks and others carrying food. Without exception, their eyes were fixed on the temporary stage not far away.

Soft, lyrical music flowed from the stage.

A rich male voice came through the microphone.

"...Three years ago, we met at Star Sea Middle School. Back then, we didn't understand what parting meant. But after weathering three years of wind and rain, today, we all understand. It turns out we part so that we may meet again under better circumstances. It turns out we part so that we may meet a better tomorrow!"

"...My fellow classmates of senior year, class seventeen, my brothers and sisters of senior year, class seventeen, we may spend our whole lives as ordinary people, but so what? In every moment when we are needed, in every moment when we face our own ordinariness, we are extraordinary. Our youth needs us to wave our own hands and say goodbye!"

"..."

Su Bai looked at the youth onstage, his voice full of feeling and his eyes glistening with tears. He nudged Shen Fei's shoulder and asked in confusion, "Who's that guy bawling his eyes out? Have I met him?"

Shen Fei shrugged. "Well, the speech was supposed to be given to the class monitor, but he said he shook whenever he saw a crowd, so we paid for an orator. He wasn't cheap, either."

"Holy shit, an orator?" Su Bai stared in bewilderment. "We're graduating, not being parted by life and death! Besides, this is our class's farewell dinner. What the hell are you doing letting some guy we don't know give a speech onstage? And he's going on about meeting? I've never fucking met him. What the hell is he talking about? It's bad enough he's lying, but he has to get so worked up about it too?"

"Who cares whether we know him? As long as the mood is right, that's enough. Look at those girls down there, Liu Juan, He Shu, and Zhou Zhou. They've all been moved to tears, which means the money was well spent!"

"Well spent, my ass." Su Bai glanced at the girls covering their faces and sobbing below the stage. His mouth twitched as he grumbled, "They can cry over this? Wouldn't they bawl their eyes out watching Tom and Jerry?"

"If the girls want to, what's it to you?" Shen Fei patted Su Bai on the shoulder and pointed toward the pool. "Lin Xue's piano performance is next. Find somewhere to sit. I've prepared a surprise for you."

"A surprise?" Su Bai's heart leaped into his throat. "I'm warning you, don't try anything. If you dare prepare flowers or a ring or anything like that and make me go onstage to confess, I'm fucking not letting you off!"

Shen Fei frowned deeply. "Fourth Brother, am I really that tacky a person in your eyes?"

Hearing that, Su Bai felt a little relieved. "Then what surprise did you prepare for me?"

"You'll find out soon enough." Shen Fei smiled mysteriously and dragged Su Bai over to the pool by sheer force. Quite a few familiar faces came over to greet them. Shen Fei dealt with them easily, while Su Bai closed his eyes and ignored everyone, looking like a brave warrior about to march to the execution ground.

Soon, the tranquil, ethereal sound of a piano, like a flowing stream, drifted from the stage. Su Bai cracked his eyes open for a peek, then quickly shut them again.

Onstage, Lin Xue wore a plain white gown with a trailing skirt. Her ten fingers constantly flitted, moved, and fell across the eighty-eight black and white keys, sending out one beautiful note after another.

It was a lovely piece of music.

She was an elegant pianist.

Perhaps the listeners had all been entranced, for only when the piece ended and Lin Xue bowed to the audience did they remember to offer a tide of applause.

Then the applause stopped abruptly.

Because the surprise Shen Fei had prepared had arrived.

The stage curtain suddenly fell as if it had been torn loose, revealing clusters of flowers that had been hidden behind it for a long time. Some were red, some white, and they were arranged like a sea of blossoms. Behind the flower sea stood a large screen.

On the screen appeared Shen Fei's somewhat flashy face. He cleared his throat and picked up a microphone, first testing it with a few "Hello, hello, hellos." Then, in a tone more serious than ever before, he shouted:

"I don't fucking want to waste words, so let's get straight to it. I have a brother, and he's a fucking coward. He's liked a girl for three years but hasn't dared tell her. The college entrance exam is almost fucking here, and he's still dragging his feet, too scared to say a word. He might not be anxious, but I am! Even if he's a coward, even if he's good for nothing, he's still the best brother I, Shen Fei, will ever have. So, on this grand day, I'm going to say something for him that he's always wanted to say but never dared-Lin Xue, Su Bai likes you!"

Onstage, Lin Xue froze, looking a little at a loss.

Below the stage, all the students erupted into a wild frenzy as if they had been injected with stimulants, their eyes all locking onto Su Bai and Shen Fei, who were hiding at the edge of the pool.

They clapped madly and shouted at the top of their lungs, "Aaaah!! Get together! Get together! Get together!"

They were simply a bunch of lunatics who loved a spectacle and didn't care how big a fuss they made.

In the video, after Shen Fei finished speaking, he flung the microphone away in an extremely cool manner and pointed fiercely beneath the screen. "One Piece!"

As a mechanism swung into motion, the flower sea beneath the screen slowly parted to form a heart-shaped opening. A small table then rose from below. On it sat an open little box, and inside the box was a sparkling diamond ring.

Su Bai, suffering a social death, wanted nothing more than to find a crack in the ground to crawl into. But he couldn't find one, so he grabbed Shen Fei by the collar and snarled, "Didn't you just fucking say you wouldn't prepare flowers and a ring?!"

Shen Fei spread his hands with a helpless look. "All right, I admit it. You know me well. I really am a tacky guy."

Onstage, Lin Xue hesitated for a long time before seemingly coming to some decision. She slowly picked up the microphone and said softly, "I... accept."

Su Bai's heart trembled.

What Hongmen Banquet is this? This is clearly Liu Bang asking Xiang Yu to be his father-in-law, then putting an arm around Xiang Zhuang's shoulders and saying, "Brother, you don't need to dance with your sword anymore. We're all family from now on, haha."

This is way too ridiculous!

When Lin Xue slowly came down from the stage wearing the ring, Shen Fei gave Su Bai a meaningful pat on the shoulder, then left.

Su Bai, however, couldn't sit still.

It wasn't because Lin Xue was particularly dazzling at that moment, but because a blonde beauty in a red qipao had appeared beside her.

The blonde beauty followed Lin Xue all the way to Su Bai's side.

"Su Bai, let me introduce you. This is our family's housekeeper and my dad's capable assistant, Sister Hong."

Sister Hong held out her hand to Su Bai. "For some reason, seeing you, Su Bai, suddenly reminds me of a few lunatics who came to Heavenly River International to cause trouble a few days ago. One of those lunatics was also named Su Bai... haha, perhaps it's just a coincidence that you share a name?"

Su Bai reached out and shook Sister Hong's hand. "Life moves fast, and young people are under a lot of pressure. It's only natural that one or two might go crazy. To tell you the truth, Sister Hong, I ran into a few lunatics a couple of days ago too. One of them happened to look a little like you. What a coincidence, wouldn't you say?"

Lin Xue watched the two of them shake hands for a long time without letting go and asked in confusion, "You two... know each other?"

"We don't."

"Never met her."

Su Bai and Sister Hong quickly released their tight grip, speaking in unison.