Abstaining from alcohol, meat, lust, and women from now on

The next day, Hughes sat in a corner of the guild, looking thoroughly upright. There wasn't a scrap of meat on the table before him; it was all vegetables.

Hughes swore that from now on, whenever he met a mage who used Transformation Magic, Smell Magic, or Charm Magic, he would beat them up first, regardless of their age or gender.

Damn it, Madam Yasulien had been so seductive last night, playing hard to get with just enough left to the imagination. But when she turned into Yasulien in front of him, his dick had gone just as limp!

He had decided: from today on, he was abstaining from alcohol, meat, lust, and women.

"Hey, Hughes! I heard you spent the night with Madam Yasulien?"

"Yeah, Hughes, lucky you! Madam Yasulien is an unparalleled beauty!"

Hughes silently plugged his ears and repeated to himself, They're all bastards. It's all bastards making noise. It's all bastards making noise!

Wakaba and the others, who had come early especially to laugh at him, doubled over when they saw Hughes like this. Wasn't he just another Macao?

After that night, Macao had sat in a daze in a corner of the guild for three days, questioning his life the whole time.

Hughes glanced at Wakaba and Macao, who were laughing the loudest. Looking at those two assholes, no wonder their marriages were unhappy later on.

"Come on, don't laugh at Hughes. Even if he really is funny!"

Lisanna, whom Mira had brought along especially for this, was holding back her laughter so hard that veins stood out at the corners of her eyes. When she saw that Hughes hadn't come home last night, she had planned to look for him at the guild.

Mira had stopped her and told her some things that weren't suitable for children. This morning, Lisanna had made a point of not eating too much, afraid she would laugh until she threw up.

Hughes picked up a piece of clothing from the floor, with no idea who had taken it off, and flung it in her face. "You precocious little brat, get lost!"

Seeing the crowd gathering to laugh at him grow larger and larger, Hughes burst into flames and chased them away. "You lot get lost too!"

"Bastards, stop pushing! Who spilled this white, sticky liquid on my clothes? Why does it smell?"

"Ah! My leftover soy milk!"

Everyone: ∑(゜д゜lll)

Everyone hurriedly scattered, leaving only Macao and Wakaba in the spotlight. The crowd took a closer look.

Macao really did have a lot of unidentified liquid spilled on him, and Wakaba really did have a cup of soy milk in his hand.

"You two bastards, be clearer when you talk next time!"

"False alarm! False alarm!"

"Look closer, the amount doesn't add up!" Hughes, having turned into Holmes, pushed up the nonexistent glasses on his nose and pointed at the floor.

There was another puddle of unidentified liquid there.

"According to Newton's Laws, that amount is far more than the cup Wakaba's holding can contain. And the unidentified liquid on Macao's clothes is also lighter in color than the soy milk left in Wakaba's cup."

"So..." Hughes deliberately raised his voice. "There's only one truth!"

"And that is... I don't know either!"

"Analyze your mother*****!"

"Macao, that's your first warning. No swearing in the guild!"

Seeing everyone descend into chaos again, cursing at one another, Hughes clapped his hands and walked out of the crowd.

Yes, he was the one who had splashed the unidentified liquid on Macao: a brand-new drink made by mixing fresh soy milk with salad dressing.

Hughes had just invented it. He had tried a sip, then poured it all over Macao's clothes.

It wasn't... bad. Everyone should give it a try; it was super sweet!

"Mira, get me a steak, will you? Order it in your name. You can eat for free at the guild."

Abstaining from alcohol, meat, and women was something the Hughes of earlier had decided. It had nothing to do with the Hughes of now!

Sitting at the bar, enjoying the steak Mira had cut up for him and drinking the beverage she had poured him, Hughes occasionally glanced back at the battlefield and thought life was pretty good.

"Mira, let's take another request today!"

Mira nodded. They did need to earn more money. Magnolia Town was a prosperous town, and prices were high.

She had to save more if she was going to support Elfman and Lisanna.

"By the way, Mira, aren't we forgetting something?" Hughes looked at the steak on his plate. He had a nagging feeling he'd missed something important.

"We haven't lost the money. I've got it!"

"Then it's fine. Eat, have some more. You're like a stick figure right now. You need to eat more to fill out."

Mira looked down and immediately retorted, "My figure is normal for my age!"

Mira kept her head down and fell silent for a while before asking out of nowhere, "Do they have to be as big as Yasulien's?"

Hughes nearly sprayed the steak out of his mouth. He turned and gave her a knock on the head. "You precocious little brat, eat! You're not allowed to mention that crossdresser again!"

"Oh!"

After eating his fill, Hughes found another corner to rest in. Last night had been so nerve-racking that he had kept an empty bed all by himself... kept the guild all by himself.

Now that he was getting sleepy, he planned to take a nap and then go make some money.

"Oh, I'm such a good man!" After that heartfelt remark, Hughes fell asleep in one second and woke up the next.

"Damn it! Can't you all keep it down?"

"Hughes, come look! Natsu found a dragon egg!"

Hughes raised his head. Natsu was holding an egg with blue markings and showing it off everywhere. So today was the day Natsu found Happy?

Yes, what was in the egg wasn't a dragon or a chicken, but a cat-a blue one with wings.

Blue... cat...!!

Oh no, my mission!!

Hughes's eyes suddenly widened. Where was his blue-nosed raccoon cat? No, where was his Chopper?

Hughes shot out of the corner like a mad dog and grabbed Mira, looking frantic. "Mira, where's my cat?"

Pretending not to know, Mira knitted her brows tightly. After pondering for a moment, she shook her head. "I don't know either!"

"Ah! This is bad. I must have left it at Yasulien's house!" Hughes pressed his palms together. "Please, Mira, help me get it back."

Even if Hughes had been given all the courage in the world right now, he wouldn't have dared go within ten meters of Yasulien, let alone go to his house.

"Then if I find it, you have to agree to one condition!"

"Ten is fine!" Hughes patted his chest and spoke without hesitation.

Mira held out her little finger and made a pinky promise with Hughes. Then she turned around and brought out a cage from behind the bar. Inside, the blue-nosed raccoon cat was sleeping comfortably.

Hughes looked at Mira calmly. He needed an explanation.

Damn it, there wasn't a single good person in this other world. They were all out to trick and bully a mentally ill man like him!

"You left it outside the guild. If I hadn't brought it in yesterday, someone would have taken it!"

"I don't want ten conditions. Just one is enough. I promise it won't be some unreasonable demand!" Mira's big, bright eyes narrowed as she spoke with a sweet smile.

Hughes accepted the cage Mira handed him and nodded helplessly.

He was a little puzzled. Wasn't Mira supposed to become scheming only after she grew up? At her age, she should have been butting heads with Erza.

But he hadn't seen it happen once. The two of them barely even spoke.