The Pain of a Married Man

"Master Ichikabe Tōkō Yunzhongniao has released a new book—hurry and buy it, or you'll miss the first edition!"

"Master Yunzhongniao has another new book? What's the title?"

"Ninpō Sōkyū—the protagonist is Sarutobi Hi no En. I heard it's a super masterpiece over five million characters long! The synopsis is already gripping: 'This is a world of Chadunla, no flashy magic, only ninjutsu evolved to its peak!'"

"Then what are we waiting for? Let's go!"

Inside the Yuelai Tavern, a man rushed in to share the good news with his friend, and the two immediately sped off to the bookstore, even using the Body Flicker Technique.

"That damned Yin Zhongniao has released another book—when will my The Paradise of Passion ever get its break!"

In a private booth of the tavern, a white-haired youth slammed the table in frustration, his heart brimming with envy and resentment.

"Sarutobi Hi no En! So this time it's a novel starring Teacher Sarutobi? Looks like Teacher Sarutobi's reputation is about to take a hit!"

A young man with long black hair sitting across from him chuckled lightly, looking forward to seeing the teacher's expression upon reading Ninpō Sōkyū.

He had heard of Ichikabe Tōkō Yunzhongniao before and had read a few of his novels—they were quite interesting, and some of the settings even inspired him.

But that Yunzhongniao always liked to add some pointless scenes to his novels; if you cut those out, the whole book was pretty good.

Indeed, the two present were Orochimaru and Jiraiya.

"Orochimaru, I suddenly remembered I left the faucet running at home. Wasting water is shameful, so let's call it here—we'll talk another day."

Jiraiya couldn't sit still anymore, making up a flimsy excuse as he got up and dashed out. Though he was full of envy and resentment toward his fellow writer Yunzhongniao, he had to admit the man's novels far surpassed his own skill.

Most importantly, those novels came with plenty of character illustrations—especially the ones of the young ladies.

At that thought, Jiraiya's mouth watered, and he couldn't help swallowing.

Just as he was about to step out of the tavern door, a stack of bills flew toward him—sixty sheets of ten-thousand-ryo notes.

"Get me a set too!"

Orochimaru's calm voice followed, clearly also interested in Yunzhongniao's new release.

"I'm just going back to turn off the faucet—I wasn't planning to line up at the Xinhua Bookstore to buy books!"

Jiraiya caught the money and instinctively retorted, but was met with Orochimaru's undisguised look of disdain.

You just named the bookstore—and you say you're not going?

"Wait, you're actually interested in that Yin Zhongniao's new book too?"

Realizing this, Jiraiya's expression gradually twisted into a lecherous grin, and he winked suggestively.

He never expected his usually serious friend to be a kindred spirit!

"Don't misunderstand—I have no interest in those pointless scenes. Some of Master Yunzhongniao's settings are quite good. For example, the last book, Shading the Heavens, gave me plenty of inspiration.

And the settings from his earlier books are also excellent—like the new power levels above Elite Jonin, such as Quasi-Kage Level, True Kage Level, and Super Kage Level, which have been recognized by all the ninja villages. He's a master-level figure who can influence the entire ninja world."

The disdainful look remained, and Orochimaru clarified that he wasn't on the same page as Jiraiya—he simply appreciated the novel settings in those stories.

For instance, the Nine Secret Arts from Shading the Heavens were quite interesting. The All Characters Secret seemed inspired by Tsunade's Monster Strength Technique and the Eight Inner Gates Formation, while the Battle Characters Secret, which could copy any ninjutsu, likely came from the Uchiha Clan's Sharingan.

And the settings in those other Yellow Volumes were also intriguing, filling some gaps in the current ninja world—like the proposed Kage-level classification.

Without Master Yunzhongniao proposing that, the highest power level in the ninja world would still be Elite Jonin, and 'Kage' would just be a title for a village leader. Even Uchiha Madara back then was only recorded as an Elite Jonin in Konoha's archives.

"I've read Shading the Heavens too. The protagonist, Ye Yuefan, was really impressive—he could apply the Lightning Armor to that area, reaching a thrust speed of ten times per second, and use lightning stimulation to heighten sensitivity for both parties.

By the way, do you think the Third Raikage actually cuckolded the Third Tsuchikage?

I've heard that the Third Tsuchikage's son, Kitsuchi, is built like a tank—even as a kid, he's no smaller than an adult. He'll probably be over two meters tall as an adult. Doesn't look at all like the offspring of that shorty Third Tsuchikage."

Jiraiya's expression grew even more lecherous, and his gossip fire burned bright.

Giving Jiraiya a speechless glance at his further degenerated state, Orochimaru felt mentally exhausted. Communicating with this guy was too tiring—their thoughts were on completely different wavelengths.

"I suggest you hurry over and line up to buy the book, or you'll miss the first edition.

The first edition is pricier, but Master Yunzhongniao's masterpiece is worth it!"

"Right, I need to get going!"

Snapping back to reality, Jiraiya dashed frantically toward the Xinhua Bookstore, even using the Body Flicker Technique.

As per usual, Master Yunzhongniao's first edition was only sold in a thousand copies in Konoha.

Although the first edition cost ten times more, for true die-hard fans, compared to waiting a whole week for the regular version, this money was nothing.

Most importantly, the first edition had the most complete collection of young lady illustrations!

Thinking of the illustrations from previous novels, Jiraiya's heart burned even hotter, and his speed kicked up a notch.

"Good—there aren't more than five hundred people!"

Arriving at the Xinhua Bookstore, Jiraiya glanced at the long line and estimated about four hundred people, feeling a wave of relief.

The Xinhua Bookstore had some restrictions on buying Master Yunzhongniao's first edition. Though you could buy for a friend, each person could only get one extra set—meaning as long as you were in the top five hundred, you were guaranteed a copy.

"Hey buddy, why are you all disguised as me to buy books?"

Patting the figure in front of him that looked exactly like himself, Jiraiya felt pretty annoyed.

Master Yunzhongniao's works always had some risqué content, and since it was the first edition, the buyers generally weren't the most upstanding folks—using a Transformation Jutsu to disguise themselves was normal.

But why did most of these people have to take on his, Jiraiya's, appearance?

Was he, the Gutsy Shinobi Jiraiya, really that unserious?

"Aren't you also in Jiraiya-sama's form?"

The guy ahead turned his head to glance at Jiraiya and shot him a disdainful look.

You're the one who turned into Jiraiya's appearance—how dare you ask that question?

That retort left Jiraiya speechless, and he felt even more depressed inside.

Had his reputation as the Sage of the Toads in Konoha really sunk this low?

It was just a few times he'd gathered materials at the bathhouse—was that really such a big deal?

"Jiraiya!"

Just as he was stewing in his gloom, he felt someone pat his shoulder. Turning around, he saw another guy who'd turned into his own form, but he quickly sensed something off.

This chakra aura felt a bit similar to his teacher's!

"Since you're here, buy a set for me too!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen, disguised as Jiraiya, whispered. But as soon as he finished speaking, it annoyed a few people waiting in line behind him.

"Hey, no cutting in line—go to the back!"

"Got no manners?"

"We're all die-hard fans of Master Yunzhongniao here—don't embarrass us, alright?"

"I'm not cutting in line, just chatting with an acquaintance!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen quickly stepped out of the line and apologized with a flattering smile.

He didn't want any trouble right now—it'd be awkward if someone saw through his identity.

"You're really the teacher?"

Jiraiya's eyes went wide. He never imagined that his always dignified and serious teacher was actually a kindred spirit.

The image of his teacher as a shining, righteous figure instantly shattered into dust, but it oddly made him feel closer.

No wonder they were fated to be master and disciple!

"Enough talk—don't forget to buy a set for me!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen, impatient and unwilling to linger, finished speaking and turned to leave, but Jiraiya grabbed his arm.

"Teacher, it's not that I don't want to buy it for you, but Orochimaru already asked me to get one for him, and he's already paid."

Jiraiya looked troubled. As a good disciple who respected his teacher, he normally wouldn't refuse his master's request, but this time he really couldn't—he'd already promised Orochimaru.

After a brief silence, Sarutobi Hiruzen lowered his voice again: "Do you have any spare money? Lend me some!"

"Teacher, you don't have money?"

Jiraiya's eyes bulged, utterly baffled.

What kind of nonsense was this? His teacher was coming to him to borrow money to buy Great Liu Bei—and he was the Hokage!

"The pain of a married man—you single dogs wouldn't understand!"

Tilting his face up at a forty-five-degree angle, Sarutobi Hiruzen let two streams of tears flow, filled with infinite love for his wife.

Of course, the main reason was that Master Yunzhongniao was just too prolific—publishing a new book every few months, averaging nearly a million words a month.

A standard version of a million words cost ten thousand ryō, while the first edition was pricier at a hundred thousand ryō.

According to the notice posted by Xinhua Bookstore this morning, this new series, Ninpō Sōkyū, was nearly six million words long, requiring six hundred thousand ryō to buy a full first-edition set.

As a married man, he didn't have big money, but he had a little—yet after multiple purchases, the private savings he'd stashed before marriage had long been drained.

Otherwise, he wouldn't have been lurking nearby just now, only showing up when he spotted the real Jiraiya.

"I didn't bring much—only four hundred thousand ryō left!"

Even more bewildered and lost, Jiraiya still picked up his Toad Wallet and took out four hundred thousand ryō to hand to his teacher.

When the teacher had swallowed his pride to borrow money, how could he refuse?

"That's enough!"

Delighted, Sarutobi Hiruzen took the four hundred thousand ryō in bills and quickly hurried to the back of the line.

Before coming, he'd swiped the pocket money from his eldest son's piggy bank, and with his own meager savings, it was enough to buy a first-edition set of Ninpō Sōkyū.

"I hope Master Yunzhongniao doesn't go too far with this one!"

Muttering to himself, Sarutobi Hiruzen felt both anticipation and nervous unease.

After all, Master Yunzhongniao's style always used famous figures and strong warriors from the ninja world as protagonists and supporting characters. For instance, the protagonist of the last novel, Shading the Heavens, was modeled after that guy, the Third Raikage.

Even the protagonist Ye Yuefan's bitter-sea phenomenon was centered on lightning, and his formidable physique mirrored the Third Raikage's recently famous title, the Strongest Shield of the Ninja World.

And now, he hadn't expected that this time Master Yunzhongniao would use him, the Hokage, as the protagonist's model for a new book.

Although Master Yunzhongniao's novels were a bit heavy on the erotic side, each protagonist's romantic luck was utterly outrageous—practically a human-shaped self-propelled cannon—making countless male readers green with envy.

He had once been filled with admiration, jealousy, and hatred toward those previous novel protagonists, never expecting that his turn would finally come.

This little heart of his was pounding, thumping nonstop.

"Damn it, over five hundred people!"

At that moment, another man also sporting Jiraiya's appearance used the Body Flicker Technique to rush over quickly. Seeing the line already five hundred strong, he felt a pang of frustration, then gritted his teeth and shouted loudly, "Brothers up front, is anyone willing to buy an extra copy for me? I'll pay an extra one hundred thousand ryo as a reward!"

The crowd in the front of the line glanced over at him but said nothing.

"Brother, stop shouting. No one's going to buy an extra copy for you—the line's already full!"

Seeing that the man was about to shout again, a nearby book fan, also sporting Jiraiya's appearance, tried to console him.

After all, Master Yunzhongniao now had quite a few die-hard fans. Although the Xinhua Bookstore always priced the first edition of that master's works at one hundred thousand ryo per million characters, on the black market the price would at least double.

If they could buy an extra set now—one for their own collection and one to sell on the black market—they could not only recoup the cost of buying the book but also make a small profit. And if they got lucky and ran into a wealthy fan, they could even make a killing.

So, for these hardcore fans, buying the first edition was both an act of faith and a business opportunity!

(Dear readers, if you think this book is decent, please cast your precious votes. Your support is my greatest motivation!)