The Pain of Married Men

"Master Ichikabe Tōkō Yunzhong Niao released a new book! Hurry and buy it, or you won't be able to get the first edition!"

"Master Yunzhongniao released another new book? What's it called?"

"Ninpō Sōkyū. The protagonist is called Sarutobi Hi no En. I heard it's a massive work of over five million words! The synopsis sounds pretty exciting too: this is a world belonging to Chadunla. There is no flashy, gorgeous magic—only ninjutsu developed to its pinnacle!"

"Then what are we waiting for? Hurry up!"

Inside Yuelai Tavern, a man hurriedly arrived to bring his friend the good news. The two immediately raced toward the bookstore, even using the Body Flicker Technique.

"That damned Yin Zhong Niao released another new book! When will my The Paradise of Passion ever rise to prominence?"

In a private room of the tavern, a white-haired young man slammed his fist onto the table, his heart filled with envy, jealousy, and hatred.

"Sarutobi Hi no En! Is this a novel with Teacher Sarutobi as the protagonist? Looks like Teacher Sarutobi is about to lose his reputation in his old age!"

The long black-haired young man sitting opposite him chuckled. He was quite looking forward to that teacher's expression after seeing Ninpō Sōkyū.

He had heard a little about Ichikabe Tōkō Yunzhong Niao and had read several of his novels. They were all quite interesting, and some of the settings within had even given him plenty of inspiration.

It was just that Yunzhong Niao always liked adding some pointless scenes into his novels. If those scenes were removed, the books would actually be quite good.

That was right. The two sitting there were Orochimaru and Jiraiya.

"Orochimaru, I just remembered that I left the faucet running at home. Wasting water is shameful, so let's leave it here for today. We can talk another day."

Jiraiya could no longer sit still. He casually made up an excuse, then got up and ran outside. Though he was full of envy, jealousy, and hatred toward Yunzhong Niao, he had to admit that Yunzhong Niao's novels were far beyond his own level.

Most importantly, the man's novels came with plenty of character illustrations, especially of the beautiful young ladies.

At that thought, Jiraiya's mouth watered, and he could not help swallowing.

Just as he was about to step out of the tavern's doors, a stack of banknotes flew over—sixty ten-thousand-ryō bills in total.

"Bring me a set too!"

Orochimaru's calm voice followed. Clearly, he was also interested in Yunzhong Niao's new book series.

"I'm just going home to turn off the faucet. I never said I was going to Xinhua Bookstore to line up and buy books!"

Jiraiya instinctively retorted as he caught the money, only to be met with Orochimaru's utterly undisguised look of contempt.

You had already named the bookstore, and you still claimed you did not want to go?

"Wait, you're actually interested in that Yin Zhong Niao's new book too?"

Realizing this, Jiraiya's expression gradually became increasingly lecherous, a lascivious grin spreading across his face. After speaking, he even wiggled his eyebrows obscenely.

He had never expected his usually serious friend to be a fellow traveler!

"Don't misunderstand. I have no interest in those pointless scenes. Some of Master Yunzhongniao's settings are quite good. For example, his previous work, Shading the Heavens, gave me quite a bit of inspiration.

"The settings in his earlier books were also very good. For instance, the newly established strength tiers above Elite Jonin—Quasi-Kage Level, True Kage Level, Super Kage Level, and so on—have gained recognition from every ninja village in the ninja world. He is already a master-level figure capable of influencing the entire ninja world."

His contemptuous expression remained unchanged as Orochimaru stated that he was not the same kind of person as Jiraiya. He simply appreciated the novel's novel settings.

For example, the Nine Secret Arts from Shading the Heavens were quite interesting. The setting of the All Characters Secret should have been inspired by Tsunade's Monster Strength Technique and the Eight Inner Gates Formation, while the Battle Characters Secret, which could copy all ninjutsu, should have been inspired by the Uchiha Clan's Sharingan.

The settings in those other yellow volumes were also quite interesting, filling certain gaps in the current ninja world. For example, there was the Kage-level classification he had proposed.

If Master Yunzhongniao had not introduced that classification, the highest strength level in the ninja world would still only be Elite Jonin. Kage would merely be a job title representing a ninja village's leader. Even Uchiha Madara, from back then, was only recorded as an Elite Jonin in Konoha's archives.

"I read Shading the Heavens too. The protagonist, Ye Yuefan, really was amazing. He could actually apply Lightning Armor to that area, reaching a thrusting speed of ten times per second. He could even use lightning release to stimulate and increase both parties' sensitivity.

"By the way, do you think the Third Raikage really cuckolded the Third Tsuchikage?

"I heard that the Third Tsuchikage's son, Kitsuchi, is incredibly burly. Even as a teenager, he was no smaller than an adult. Once he grows up, he will probably be over two meters tall. No matter how you look at it, he doesn't seem like the offspring of that little runt, the Third Tsuchikage."

Jiraiya's expression became increasingly lascivious as the flames of gossip burned fiercely in his heart.

Orochimaru glanced speechlessly at the ever more depraved Jiraiya and felt exhausted. Communicating with this guy was simply too tiring. Their minds were not even on the same wavelength.

"I suggest you hurry over and line up to buy the book. Otherwise, you won't get a first edition.

"The first edition may be a little expensive, but Master Yunzhongniao's masterpieces are worth the price!"

"Right, I need to get over there quickly!"

Suddenly coming to his senses, Jiraiya rushed toward Xinhua Bookstore in a panic, even using the Body Flicker Technique.

According to the usual practice, only one thousand first editions of Master Yunzhongniao's masterpieces were sold in Konoha.

Though first editions cost ten times as much, for true hardcore fans, compared to waiting a whole week to buy the regular edition, that amount of money was nothing.

Most importantly, the first edition had the most complete collection of beautiful young lady illustrations!

Thinking of the illustrations of beautiful young ladies in those previous novels, Jiraiya's heart burned even hotter, and his speed surged to another level.

"Good, there aren't more than five hundred people!"

When Jiraiya arrived at Xinhua Bookstore and saw the long line, he quickly scanned it and found that there were only around four hundred people. He immediately relaxed.

Xinhua Bookstore had some restrictions on purchasing first editions of Master Yunzhongniao's works. Although customers could buy for friends, each person could only purchase one additional set. In other words, anyone who made it into the first five hundred would definitely be able to buy one.

"Brother, why did all of you turn into Jiraiya to buy books?"

Jiraiya patted the identical figure in front of him and felt rather depressed.

Master Yunzhongniao's works all had some heavily suggestive content. Coupled with the fact that this was a first edition, the people who came to buy them generally were not particularly respectable. It was perfectly normal to use a Transformation Jutsu as a disguise.

But why had most of these people chosen to turn into Jiraiya?

Was he, Gutsy Shinobi Jiraiya, really that improper?

"You turned into Lord Jiraiya too!"

The man in front turned around, looked Jiraiya over, and gave him a disdainful look.

You had turned into Jiraiya too, and you had the nerve to ask that?

That retort left Jiraiya speechless, making him feel even more depressed.

Had Sage of the Toads Jiraiya's reputation in Konoha really fallen to this extent?

He had only gone to gather material at the bathhouse a few times. Was that really necessary?

"Jiraiya!"

While he was feeling depressed, he suddenly felt someone pat his shoulder. Turning around, he found another guy transformed into his appearance, but he quickly realized something was wrong.

This chakra presence was somewhat similar to his teacher's!

"Since you're here, buy a set for me too!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen, transformed into Jiraiya's appearance, spoke in a low voice. However, the moment he finished speaking, several people in line behind him became displeased.

"Hey, no cutting in line! Go line up in the back!"

"Do you have any manners?"

"We're all Master Yunzhongniao's hardcore fans. Don't embarrass us like this!"

"I'm not cutting in line. I just ran into an acquaintance and was chatting!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen hurriedly stepped outside the line and said with an apologetic smile.

At a time like this, he did not want to cause any trouble. It would be embarrassing if anyone saw through his identity.

"You really are Teacher?"

Jiraiya's eyes widened. He had never expected his always imposing and serious teacher to be a fellow traveler.

The lofty and righteous image of his teacher in his heart instantly shattered into pieces, yet he somehow felt even closer to him.

It seemed that becoming teacher and student really had been their shared destiny!

"Stop talking nonsense. Don't forget to buy a set for me too!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen did not want to stay here long and was growing impatient. After speaking, he prepared to leave, only for Jiraiya to grab him.

"Teacher, it's not that I don't want to buy one for you. It's just that Orochimaru has already asked me to buy one for him, and he even gave me the money."

Jiraiya looked troubled. As a good disciple who respected his teacher, he would normally never refuse his benefactor's request. But this time, he truly could not, since he had already promised Orochimaru.

After a brief silence, Sarutobi Hiruzen spoke softly again. "Do you have any extra money? Lend some to me!"

"Teacher, you don't have any money?"

Jiraiya's eyes widened in complete confusion.

What kind of operation was this? The Hokage had actually come to borrow money from him to buy Great Liu Bei!

"The pain of married men is something a single dog like you would never understand!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen raised his face toward the sky at a forty-five-degree angle, two streams of tears running down his cheeks, filled with boundless love for his wife.

Of course, the main reason was that Master Yunzhongniao was simply too prolific. He released a book every few months, writing nearly a million words each month on average.

A million words in the regular edition cost only ten thousand ryō, while the first edition was more expensive at one hundred thousand ryō.

According to the notice Xinhua Bookstore had posted that morning, this new set of Ninpō Sōkyū had nearly six million words. It would take six hundred thousand ryō to buy a first-edition set.

As a married man, he did not have much money, though he still had a little pocket money. But after doing this repeatedly, the small secret stash he had saved before marriage had long been squandered.

Otherwise, he would not have lurked nearby just now, waiting until he spotted the real Jiraiya before revealing himself.

"I didn't bring much money. I only have four hundred thousand ryō left!"

Though he felt even more confused and lost, Jiraiya still took out his Toad Wallet and withdrew four hundred thousand ryō, handing it to his teacher.

His teacher had already humbled himself enough to borrow money from him. Could he refuse?

"That's enough!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen happily accepted the four hundred thousand ryō in banknotes and hurried to the back of the line.

Before coming here, he had taken the spending money from his eldest son's piggy bank. Added to his own tiny savings, it was enough to buy a first-edition set of Ninpō Sōkyū.

"I just hope Master Yunzhongniao doesn't write anything too outrageous!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen muttered softly. His heart was filled with anticipation, but also unease and apprehension.

After all, Master Yunzhongniao's style had always been to use famous and powerful figures from the ninja world as templates for protagonists and supporting characters. For example, the protagonist of his previous novel, Shading the Heavens, had been modeled after the Third Raikage.

Even Ye Yuefan's Sea of Bitterness phenomenon was centered around lightning, while his powerful physique corresponded to the Third Raikage's recently spread title, The Strongest Shield of the Ninja World.

What he had not expected was that Master Yunzhongniao had used him, the Hokage, as the protagonist's template for this new novel.

Although Master Yunzhongniao's novels were a little too suggestive, every protagonist had outrageously absurd luck with women. They were practically humanoid self-propelled cannons, the envy of countless male compatriots.

He had once been full of envy, jealousy, and hatred toward the protagonists of those earlier novels. He had never expected it would finally be his turn.

His poor little heart was thumping nonstop.

"Damn it, there are already more than five hundred people!"

At this moment, a man also wearing Jiraiya's appearance used the Body Flicker Technique to rush over. Seeing that the line had already reached five hundred people, he became deeply annoyed. Then, gritting his teeth, he shouted, "Brothers in front, can anyone buy one for me? I'll pay an extra hundred thousand ryō as a reward!"

Everyone in the line ahead glanced over, but none of them spoke.

"Brother, stop shouting. No one will buy one for you. The slots are already full!"

Seeing that the man was about to shout again, a book fan beside him, also wearing Jiraiya's appearance, tried to persuade him.

After all, Yunzhong Niao now had quite a few hardcore fans. Although Xinhua Bookstore had always priced the first editions of the master's works at one hundred thousand ryō per million words, their price on the black market would at least double.

As long as they bought one extra set now, they could keep one for themselves and sell the other on the black market. Not only would they recover the cost of this purchase, they could even make a small profit. If they were lucky enough to encounter a wealthy book fan, they might make a fortune.

Thus, for these hardcore fans, buying first editions was both a matter of faith and a business opportunity!

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