If Idiocy Had a Color, It Would Definitely Be Blue

"Haah... Mayuna, I told you not to cast magic buffs on me."

Ruben, sprawled across the table, yawned and reluctantly raised himself as he complained. He wanted to keep sleeping, but his brain told him he had already slept enough. Even if he tried, he would not be able to fall asleep again. Naturally, all thanks to that exploitative Magic God.

"You stayed up all night researching again, didn't you? Who knows how long you'd sleep otherwise. The support spell [Sleep Compression] is pretty good, right?"

Mayuna smiled smugly. Ruben had not been keeping day and night reversed for just a day or two, but she was no pushover either. She had directly and forcefully applied magic to Ruben's brain to help him rest. Only someone of her level would dare use this kind of mental magic; a lower-level mage could easily end up killing someone with it.

"You've taken away the joy of sleeping."

Ruben wanted to tell Mayuna how wonderful it was for ordinary people to get a good night's sleep after overworking themselves, but now even that simple pleasure had been taken from him.

"Who cares? I'm your creditor now, so hurry up and make me cake. One strawberry and one chocolate. Not one piece less."

Mayuna's cravings were already roaring in her stomach. She really wanted to know why everything Ruben made was so delicious. Besides, these desserts did not clash with regular meals at all; she could completely eat four meals a day. Her taste buds had long since been conquered by the soft, sweet cakes.

"Hold out your hand."

"Okay."

Mayuna obediently held out her right hand before Ruben and watched as he felt around her forearm and upper arm twice.

"You've gained one thousand five hundred grams."

"Huh?"

"Before you came to my house, your body was weak, but you hadn't grown thin from illness. Your weight and figure were both within the standard range for a normal woman. But now..."

Ruben looked at Mayuna with a regretful expression. The branch on his head quietly opened its One-Eye as well, and the three eyes stared at her. The room became strangely quiet.

"I don't believe it! How can you tell just by touching me? Do you have psychic powers?!"

"Because of my past experience, I never made a scale. But Dragon can transform into one. Want to try it?"

Ruben suggested it. Dragon called himself the Invisible Blade because he could transform into weapons of all shapes. As long as he knew the internal structure, becoming a simple scale was naturally no problem.

"Dragon has a grudge against me. He definitely won't tell you the truth..."

Mayuna still refused to accept her fate. She looked like someone struggling desperately at the edge of a cliff, while Dragon's single eye had already curved into an expression of near-death laughter.

"Whether you're the Magic God or the God of Light, as long as you're a living creature, eating and drinking every day without exercising will make you fat. Think about what you've been doing."

Mayuna began reflecting on her recent life. In the morning, she made Ruben cook. At noon, she made Ruben cook. In the afternoon, she made Ruben prepare desserts. At night, she made Ruben cook. The rest of the time, she lay on the soft sofa and read... Yeah.

How was that any different from being useless?! And wasn't that way too lazy?! Why had the dignified Magic God fallen to such a state?!

Ruben had no idea what Mayuna was thinking. Rather than advising her on what she should do, he simply went to prepare the food. It was not like he was the one getting fat.

"Then I'll give you a day off. I-it's not because I care about my weight... Have I really gained weight?"

Still unwilling to give up, Mayuna reached out and touched her lower belly. Her expression immediately changed. What should have been smooth and flat now had a faint softness to it. She hurriedly grabbed Ruben before he could go far and asked with a pitiful look.

"So why are we fishing?"

This resource-rich little Mountain was not just an empty boast. Mayuna and Ruben were now fishing by the shore of a lake. The lake was neither too large nor too small; if they looked into the distance, they could barely make out small animals drinking on the opposite shore. Mayuna asked because she could simply blast all the fish out with magic. There was no need to waste time on such an activity.

"Fish has much less fat than other meats. It's rich in protein, replenishes vitamins, and can also help with exercise."

Ruben did not want to argue with Mayuna, whose head was full of violent solutions. He simply explained the benefits of fish. To him, fishing was also an enjoyable process.

"Come to think of it, this water is really clear. It's almost on par with the rivers in the imperial capital."

Mayuna dipped her hand into the lake and swished it around a few times, visibly surprised. The water in the imperial capital was purified of impurities by countless mages using purification magic day and night. How could an ordinary little Mountain have water quality like this?

"Of course. The water here already meets drinking standards. The water we use normally is also piped in from here."

Splash!

As Ruben spoke, a huge black shadow suddenly flashed through the clear water. After circling underwater for a while, it abruptly surged up and attacked Ruben.

"Defense spell [Mana Barrier]!"

Mayuna had not expected an attack. Her body instinctively used mana to form a sturdy transparent barrier around herself and Ruben.

Smack!

A teeth-grating sound rang out as the attacker unmistakably slammed into the barrier. Before them was a flattened face pressed tightly against it, its mouth and nose scrunched together. From Mayuna's perspective, it looked utterly disgusting.

"Aqua, I told you not to suddenly pounce on me."

After the mana barrier vanished, the attacker fell down as well. Ruben helplessly put away his fishing rod. Sure enough, the bait tied to the line had disappeared too.

"What, what is this?! Why was there a mana barrier? Don't you have no mana?!"

The attacker named Aqua propped herself up with both arms and barely climbed to her feet, constantly rubbing her red, swollen nose as she complained. Judging by her face alone, she was also a beautiful woman, with lovely sky-blue eyes and hair. However, pale blue fish fins grew from her ears. Her bare upper body was covered only by two shells over her sensitive areas, while her lower body was a sky-blue fish tail.

"You're from the sea race? A mermaid?"

Mayuna was well-informed enough to recognize Aqua's race at a glance. Looking more closely, she no longer found Aqua as disgusting as before. In any case, Aqua's chest was not large enough to make Mayuna jealous.

"Huh, a woman? Waaaah! Ruben, you can't do this! You promised to have children with me, so why is there another woman beside you?!"

Only now did Aqua notice Mayuna beside Ruben. Slapping her tail, she wriggled over to Ruben, grabbed his clothes with both hands, and began crying loudly. Her tears turned into white pearls that fell to the ground, and Ruben picked them up one by one.

"A lot happened. Mayuna, this is Aqua. As you can see, she's a mermaid."

"So the legend that a mermaid's tears turn into pearls when she cries on land is true! But don't mermaids all live in the Endless Sea? Why is she here?"

Mayuna curiously looked at the pearls in Ruben's hand. This place was far from the Endless Sea, and unless this mermaid could fly, she would definitely have died somewhere while crossing the continent.

"Good question. That day, a huge tornado suddenly blew up at sea. I thought it looked really fun, so I swam into it. When I woke up, I found myself here. He healed the dozen or so bones I broke, ehehe."

"With all due respect, you didn't fix this mermaid's damaged brain."

Mayuna's expression changed subtly after hearing that. Tornadoes in this world were not natural phenomena, but real tornadoes—elemental hurricanes whipped up by wind dragons while traveling. Their power could completely tear apart the tough bodies of magical beasts below level six. This mermaid had gone inside because she thought it looked fun. She had to be an idiot.

"She was born that way."

P.S. Please bookmark and recommend this! Recently, there's also been a request for reading lists, so I'm following the trend and asking for reading lists too!

P.S. If Aqua were the heroine, this book would be a world of idiots. Sadly, she isn't. The author was just too lazy to think of another name—and speaking of blue, was there any more fitting name?