I Signed In for a Hundred Million Years in the Primordial Era, Now I'm Back to Be a Modern-Day Slacker
Chapter 28

Invalid Hunger and Invalid Instant Noodles

2,287 words8 min read1 views
8mo ago

Su Wanqing held the phone, which seemed to have been "formatted" and "reinstalled and upgraded," listening to her assistant Xiao Lin's incoherent, excited report from the other end. She felt like she was floating on clouds, her old understanding of the world completely shattered beneath her feet.

The cyberattack had stopped inexplicably, the crisis averted... all because of her insane decision to throw her phone into a foot basin? And the great being had merely waved a hand in his sleep, erasing all traces as if nothing had ever happened.

This had gone beyond the realm of the fantastical and entered a domain of "Rules" she couldn't comprehend or describe.

She hung up, her body still trembling slightly from lingering fear and excitement. She looked at the Chaos Green Lotus pot in the corner, which had returned to its simple, ancient appearance, like an ordinary piece of art. Her gaze was incredibly complex. Awe, gratitude, fear, and a hint of... absurd dependence?

A clear rumble from her stomach reminded her that she hadn't eaten anything substantial since last night, apart from a few licks of noodle soup and one noodle. The dual exhaustion of her mind and body had unleashed hunger like a delayed tsunami, sweeping over her.

She needed food. Immediately.

Her gaze subconsciously drifted to the kitchen, where the refrigerator door was still wide open, revealing a mess inside. Although the cooling system had been "muted" by the great being, there should still be some ready-to-eat items inside... like bread, ham, or something?

She tiptoed around the sofa, trying not to make a sound, and slipped into the kitchen like a thief. Due to the power outage, the temperature inside the refrigerator had risen, and the cold air had long since dissipated, leaving a slightly stale smell mixed with various food odors.

She rummaged quickly. Sure enough, on the door shelf of the refrigerator compartment, she found an unopened bag of whole wheat toast and several boxes of individually wrapped cheese slices. Although they had lost their chilled crispness, they should be fine for filling her stomach.

Clutching them like a lifeline, she tore open the toast packaging, took out two dry slices of bread, sandwiched a slice of cheese between them, and without any regard for her image, took a huge bite!

However--

The moment the bread entered her mouth, Su Wanqing's brow furrowed tightly!

Dry! Hard! Coarse!

It was like chewing on sawdust! There was no wheat fragrance, only a strange taste of industrial additives and the staleness of being stored for too long! The cheese slices had also lost their usual creamy, salty flavor, becoming as difficult to swallow as plastic!

What... what is this stuff?!

If it were before, she might have managed to swallow it down when ravenously hungry. But now, her taste buds and body had been elevated to a new dimension by that "divine noodle soup" and Chaos Spirit Tea! Her body instinctively produced an extremely strong rejection and... disdain for such mundane, coarse, and spiritless food!

"Gag..." She couldn't help but gag, forcing the mouthful of bread mixture, which felt like gravel, down her throat. Her throat felt scraped raw, and her stomach churned violently.

The immense drop in quality made her want to cry. It's easy to go from frugality to luxury, but hard to go from luxury to frugality! Having tasted such exquisite delicacies, going back to these was simply torture!

Unwilling to give up, she dug out a box of yogurt that looked decent and took a big sip through the straw--

Sour! Acrid! A distinct taste of preservatives and artificial flavors hit her head! It was equally, outrageously undrinkable!

It's over.

Su Wanqing despaired, realizing that her taste buds and digestive system had likely been thoroughly spoiled by the great being's "pig feed"! Ordinary food could no longer satisfy her body's instinctive needs; it had become a burden!

The hunger was still fierce, but her physiological disgust towards the "junk food" in front of her was even stronger! She looked at the food filling the refrigerator, feeling a sense of despair that she couldn't even bring herself to eat anything!

Could it be... that from now on, she could only live on the scraps casually bestowed by the great being?! How could she go on like this?!

A wave of immense frustration and grievance washed over her, making her eyes sting.

As she stared blankly at the refrigerator, her heart filled with sorrow--

From the direction of the sofa, a faint, sleepy mumble could be heard.

Ling Ye seemed to have been disturbed by some subtle noise again. His eyes were closed, his brow furrowed unconsciously, and his nose twitched slightly, as if he had smelled something unpleasant in his dream.

"...Inferior... oil... rancid... carbohydrates..."

A few vague words, filled with intense disdain, escaped his lips intermittently.

Clearly, even in his sleep, the aroma of "inferior food" that Su Wanqing had emitted when she opened the refrigerator, chewed the dry bread, and drank the yogurt had polluted the great being's sensitive olfactory environment, causing him displeasure.

Su Wanqing instantly held her breath, frozen in place, not daring to move, not even daring to put down the half-eaten piece of bread in her hand.

Fortunately, Ling Ye only mumbled a few words and didn't wake up. He seemed to instinctively want to block out these "unclean" odors, turning over and facing the back of the sofa.

Then, under Su Wanqing's tense gaze, the sleeping Ling Ye, with the hand resting on the side of the sofa, extremely casually... towards the kitchen refrigerator... gently... waved.

As if feeling a bit hot in his sleep, he casually fanned the air.

There was no light, no energy fluctuation.

But the moment he waved his hand--

In the kitchen, the double-door refrigerator, with its door wide open and emitting the smell of "inferior food," along with everything stored inside... bread, yogurt, cheese, vegetables, fruits, meat, ice cream... even the refrigerator itself...

Like a pencil drawing erased by an eraser, extremely abruptly, completely... disappeared from Su Wanqing's sight!

Not invisible!

It was a true, physical disappearance!

All that remained in its place was an empty cabinet space embedded in the wall, and a faint ripple in the air, as if space had been smoothed out!

Su Wanqing: "!!!!!!"

The half-eaten piece of bread in her hand "plop" fell to the ground, her mouth agape in an 'O' shape, her eyes wide as if about to pop out of their sockets!

Where... where did the refrigerator go?!

And all those things inside?!

Where did the large, double-door stainless steel refrigerator go?!!

Just like that... with a casual wave... it was gone?!!

What kind of operation was this?! If it's noisy, mute it; if it's ugly, kick it away; now that it smells bad... just erase it from the world?!!

Su Wanqing felt her brain's CPU had completely fried, smoke rising. She looked at the empty cabinet, then at Ling Ye on the sofa, whose brow had relaxed and who was sleeping more soundly as the air seemed to have become "fresher." A chill ran from the soles of her feet straight to the crown of her head!

This wasn't a matter of power anymore, this was simply... a Creation God-level tantrum!!!

Meanwhile.

At the other end of the city, in the basement of a dilapidated, abandoned building that had been derelict for years.

It was dark, damp, and piled high with construction debris.

Suddenly--

"Clang! Rattle--!"

A brand new, silver-gray, double-door smart refrigerator appeared out of thin air, as if thrown from the void, smashing heavily onto the dusty concrete floor! It made a tremendous noise!

The refrigerator door sprang open from the impact, spilling all sorts of food, drinks, and ice cream onto the ground, mixing with the dust and trash in a chaotic mess.

Several homeless people who had been rummaging through nearby trash cans for food were startled by the sudden loud noise and the "windfall from heaven." They cautiously gathered around, looking at the brand-new refrigerator, seemingly fallen from the sky and filled with food, exchanging bewildered glances as if they had seen a ghost.

"Oh my god... Who threw this away? It's brand new!"

"There's meat! Ice cream! Look!"

"We're rich! We're rich! Let's move it!"

After a brief moment of shock, the homeless people erupted in ecstasy, scrambling to grab the scattered food and the refrigerator, which, despite the fall, still looked incredibly valuable.

No one knew where the refrigerator came from or why it appeared there. It was as if some incomprehensible being had casually "deleted" it from one coordinate and then randomly "pasted" it into this neglected corner.

Inside the villa kitchen.

Su Wanqing was still reeling from the shock of the refrigerator's sudden disappearance, unable to snap back to reality.

Her hunger, stimulated by the unpalatable bread and yogurt she had just eaten, had become even more ferocious, burning her stomach like fire!

What should she do?

The food was gone!

The only person capable of making "edible food" was asleep, and he clearly despised her!

Was she going to starve to death here?!

Extreme hunger and despair, coupled with her brain running on overdrive, suddenly sparked an idea!

Her gaze snapped towards... the floor in the corner of the island counter.

There, quietly lying were two empty... ice cream cartons that Ling Ye had casually discarded!

And... the plastic spoon he had used to eat ice cream, which he had later disdainfully tossed aside!

On the inside of the cartons, there were still some melted and solidified remnants of ice cream, emitting a faint milky fragrance and a trace of the extremely, extremely thin cold aura of "Ten Thousand Year Ice Marrow"!

Su Wanqing's eyes instantly lit up! Like finding a life-saving straw!

Even though it was just the leftovers from the "big shot's" meal, this was probably the only thing she could eat right now that her body wouldn't reject!

She no longer cared about dignity or hygiene. Driven by hunger, she pounced like a famished wolf, carefully picking up the two empty cartons. Her trembling fingers slowly scraped the solidified milk residue from the inside walls, and she eagerly brought it to her mouth!

A faint taste, sweet and milky with a cool sensation, melted in her mouth. Although it was pitifully little, almost tasteless, her body didn't show any rejection! In fact, nourished by this faint cold aura, her hunger seemed to have eased slightly!

It works!

It really works!

Su Wanqing acted as if she had discovered a new continent, scraping the residue from the cartons with even more vigor. She even picked up the plastic spoon and licked it!

Her appearance was pathetic, pitiful, and tinged with a madness born from being pushed to the brink.

Just as she was intently "licking the box"--

"Gurgle gurgle..."

A louder, more urgent rumbling sound came not from her, but from... the direction of the sofa!

Su Wanqing's movements froze abruptly. She looked up in horror.

On the sofa, a clear rumbling of hunger emanated from Ling Ye's stomach area! The sound was so loud that it even echoed in the silent living room!

The "big shot"... was also hungry?!

Ling Ye's brow furrowed deeply. Even in his sleep, he seemed troubled by this intense physiological need. He unconsciously smacked his lips, turned over, and one hand even unconsciously covered his stomach.

Then, under Su Wanqing's nervous gaze, the sleeping Ling Ye's hand, which was covering his stomach, very naturally... began to fumble around on the old cloth bag he always kept beside him...

Was he trying to find something to eat in his dream?

Su Wanqing's heart leaped into her throat! What was in that cloth bag?! A Buzhou Mountain rolling pin? A Chaos Green Lotus foot basin? What if he pulled something out and started gnawing on it like a biscuit?!

Just as she was so scared she could barely breathe--

Ling Ye's fumbling hand suddenly paused, as if he had touched something.

His brow relaxed slightly, and a hint of dreamlike satisfaction appeared on his face, as if he had found the "snack" he was looking for.

Then, under Su Wanqing's dumbfounded gaze--

Ling Ye, with his eyes closed, very naturally pulled out a lump of... something?... from that tattered cloth bag.

The thing looked dusty and limp, like a ball of... moldy, long-stale, dehydrated... dough?! There were even a few suspicious dark mold spots on the surface! It exuded an indescribable scent, as if it had traversed endless years... a scent of staleness, decay, yet with a hint of a peculiar Origin aura!

He held that lump of "dried moldy dough," which he suspected was a prehistoric fossil, and with extreme naturalness... brought it to his lips, opened his mouth... and with a "crunch," took a bite!

The crisp sound, like breaking a dry twig, was particularly jarring in the living room!

Ling Ye closed his eyes, chewed a few times, and a satisfied expression appeared on his face. He mumbled in his sleep, "Mmm... old starter... tastes authentic..."

Then, he took a few more "crunch, crunch" bites, eating with great relish, as if he were enjoying the most delicious delicacy in the world.

Su Wanqing: "..."

She watched the powerful figure gnaw on that "old starter fossil" that even a dog wouldn't sniff at. Then she looked down at the empty ice cream container in her own hand, licked clean, not even a trace of milk left...

At this moment, she felt a deep, despairing doubt about her future "dining" standards...

Her taste buds and digestive system were probably not far from "failing"

End of Chapter
Novel
How was this translation?

Explore the wiki